c-section a must, if refused i'll need to pay, advise on getting c-section on nhs or paying the nhs in wales, or private c-section in wales

[Ema76]

a c-section is a must for me.
i am really worried that i will be refused one on the nhs. if so i have to have options. can i pay the nhs to give me one? really want to have my baby in wales too which restricts me as it seems more private c-sections are done in London.
Does anyone know of a good private hospital in wales (south in particular) and how much it would cost?

Many thanks for your help.

My own experience is that vaginal childbirth is the most horrible thing that could happen to anyone, and that caesareans are fantastic! We are all different.

Expat

To your comment about antenatal depression I would add that one of the potential causes of PND is trauma from birth experience (from feeling out of control/the invasive cascade of medical intervention/ labouring alone with insufficient midwives to provide adequate care/ crash c-sections for those who intended a fairly natural birth or whatever reason)

Having read Ema76's posts IMHO the thing that may lead her to be antenatally depressed is knowing in advance that in about 6 months time she will have to go through something she finds unthinkable and has been dreading all her life and what physical/emotional state she will end up in post-natally as a result of this.

Ante-natal stress has been found to be bad for babies birthweights and chemical/hormonal balances post birth.

I can't help thinking that Ema76 is trying to sort this problem out within the resources available to her via the NHS so as to minimise any effect of this on her unborn child and herself. I fail to see why she is to be derided as not having researched the matter for herself, we have no proof of that and contrary to your post she does seem to understand that her fear of childbirth is a very real and serious psychological issue requiring attention from medical staff in acknowledging that if they O.K. a c-section she will probably relax and enjoy her pregnancy more which could benefit her baby and herself.

Sitdown, ELCS doesn't guarantee a women will not suffer any of those long term traumatic effects. They can happen as complications of the surgery.

She needs to get the root of her fears.

Having major surgery isn't going to solve that.

i totally agree mabanana and think that vb is unthinkable and horrid.

i agree strongly with sitdownpleasegeorge and thank you for your support. I do need to have my mind put at rest and that is my aim for the sake of myself and baby.

Try looking up poor 'whomovedmychocolate's latest posts if you think that ELCS is the problem-free way to go.

This poor lady has been left in agony and now fighting the NHS to get a hernia the size of a small melon repaired quickly, as well as the damage to her stomach muscles.

And there are posters on this site who have had babies die during natural childbirth, or be left catastrophically disabled. I think citing individual experiences are pointless.

why? because they don't agree with yours, banana?

if you're looking for guarantees in life, it's best not to have any kids at all - or do any number of other things in life.

Sorry, Expat, but Mabanana is right.

WMMC's case is awful - but try talking to Riven about VB... Equally horrendous.

ALl our cases are different. We can only put forward what happened for us, in our own situations.

FWIW, I'm not sure how much of a choice Ema has. She is so totally sure she cant' have a VB, that it would be almost a certainty that she'd end up with an Em CS if made try (Not having a pop, Ema... I would have too.. I just wasn't mentally prepared for a VB IYSWIM)

WHat (IMHO) Ema needs now is to be able to talk to someone truthfully so that she gets the delivery she wants.

Ema - I have only read the first bit of your thread so apologies if this has already been said. You can get a CS on the NHS for tokophobia, the fear of childbirth. You will need to speak to your consultant though and have counselling probably before he will agree.

I had a fear of birth with DD1 as I have come across numerous botched births in my jo. I had counselling and eventually gave labour a shot but then had a CS anyway for foetal distress. I had a planned CS with DD2 (transverse lie) and will have a planned CS with this baby as I've had 2 already. I was really worried about getting the CS agreed for DD2 as she wasn't tranxverse then, but the registrar agreed to it at about 20 weeks.

I recovered really well from both sections and the elective one was a very positive (though not painfree) experience. There are risks of course, but your consultant will talk to you about this. The risk to your mental health is a great one which must also be factored in.

Good luck with the birth. I think perhaps thinking about a doula(even for CS) might help your anxieties. There are lots on here who might be able to offer more advice - Lulumama, Mars, Hertsnessex.

All the best

Now, that's just silly Expat. Unless you think citing the experience of, say, a poster whose baby died during vaginal childbirth, or one whose baby was left totally paralysed due to natural childbirth is remotely helpful to someone planning a vaginal birth? Individual unusual experiences are rarely useful to someone making a decision like this. And frankly, if you are swapping horror stories, then the dead baby is more persuasive than a non-lifethreatening complication of a caesarean.

Sorry, youcannot, but in your opinion she is right.

In others, she is not.

Because cases like that can and do happen.

Riven would be happy to tell you she wasn't just a vaginal birth. She was a VBA3C.

Just read what I'd written..

I should clarify that IMHO mabanana is right... Obviously I don't have some higher power that allows me to actually decide who is right and wrong!

Well if we're not going to cite individual experiences then we're back to the stats which show that c-sections are more likely to result in death than vaginal deliveries (and things like 'twice nothing is still nothing' is the sort of stupid thing doctors say - of course bad things happen to people -more often in the case of death and c-section - ).

It's silly to YOU, mabanana, but I doubt people who've had serious complications - some of whom have posted on here - found their experiences silly at all.

x post Expat!

You are right on that one!

Now you are being deliberately obtuse in order to insult me Expat. As is clear from my post, I obviously do not think anyone's traumatic experiences are 'silly'. What I think is silly is citing one story and saying 'that's what happens in caesareans' while we all know that we can bat individual stories back and forth ratcheting up the horror as we go. Because having babies can be risky. As risks go, a planned elective caesarean in a healthy young woman is very safe for the mother, and even more so for her baby.

And a straightforward vaginal delivery is safer. By a considerable margin. interesting article here

do get over yourself, mabanana. you're the one who's taking everything personally. continue on feeling outraged over some random stranger's opinion online, in other words, over FA.

Ema, you might find this reassuring.
www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1584671/Women-choosing-caesarean-have-low-death-rate.html

Ignore the scaremongering. It's mean to try and frighten an already anxious pregnant woman. I honestly don't know what people get out of it.

Stats on repeat caesareans in the US, while clearly helpful when trying to scare someone, are actually of little relevance to someone planning one child in the UK.

Well I planned one child. Ended up with 3. All sections. And ended up experiencing some of the complications associated with sections.

I wish I had known about the risk of repeat sections whilst making the decision on my first. Because finding out about them during my second pregnancy wasn't much fun.

Hi Ema

I haven't a fear of childbirth (more than the usual, ie it blinking hurts) but I am emetophobic, and I can relate to your fear in the sense that there is nothing that would persuade me to put myself willingly at risk of vomiting.

For this reason, I was insistent that the midwives did not perform an assisted third stage on me with my second child. This was because after my first, I had the third stage managed (injection that is routinely given) and afterwards I was very sick.

I researched the possible causes and found that it could have been due to this drug. So throughout my second pregnancy I insisted that I was NOT having a managed third stage. The midwives went blue in the face trying to tell me I might need it, and eventually I agreed they could bring the drug with them but I didn't want it unless necessary...I was convinced my research was correct and this had caused my vomiting. I was almost paralysed with fear about it.

Anyway I had my home birth as planned and then I bled, very heavily, for a few minutes while the midwife asked me repeatedly if she should administer this drug that would probably save my life - I agreed immediately but she was so sure I wouldn't that she didn't hear me and just kept asking and asking and apologising! I shouted 'yes just do it!!!' as I thought I was going to die...she did it, the bleeding stopped (she had really been panicking, was about to call ambulance - it was very serious) and I was Ok.

I wasn't sick. I had been totally wrong! No idea what caused the sickness the first time but there you go...all's well and all that.

I did get very upset with people trying to persuade me I was wrong before the event though as I could not countenance the idea of being sick and would rather have died - or so I thought

Anyway...I hope you manage to get someone to agree to a section, because I think it will make you feel more relaxed and that is definitely a good thing. However a phobia such as this might benefit from addressing at a later date - perhaps you would be happier all round if you could get a more rational perspective on it.

Wishing you lots of luck and peace xx

And everyone who's having a go at her - stop it!
She's obviously terrified and no amount of rational argument will change that, because it isn't rational in the first place...

Mabanana are you NAB?

i think it is mad wanting a cs but i also think you are working yourself up for no reason. most hospitals would give everyone an elective section if they could get away with it. so much easier on the scheduling.

Mabanana interesting statement about having a requested elective c-section resulting in just about the best psychological outcome of any birth. I do feel that I went into the birth positive and came out of it too, no signs of PND with either child despite difficult circumstances at times.

Expat

Your faith in nhs counselling to get to the bottom of Ema76's fears is charming but IME a little optimistic. I do think counselling is an excellent idea but predicting the outcome in the time constraints of 30 weeks is impossible.

All 4 of the risk possibilities mentioned in my last post might well be avoided by an elcs.

For a start no risk of crash c-section.

No risk of induction/other intervention in the birth process.

No risk of labouring alone for long periods of time in an understaffed delivery unit. - there are protocols for the number and type of staff required in theatre for a c-section.

If c-section has been fully researched and request for a section granted surely you would feel in control as you approach your c-section date. You cannot dictate what happens in the theatre as jimjams has already mentioned having incontinence issues from having her bladder damaged by surgeons cutting device but if you opted for an elective c-section and were aware of this risk (it is pointed out again when you sign the consent form) it is less of a shock after the event than no-one discussing the possibility of long-term urinary/faecal incontinence (and future attempts at corrective surgery) from 3rd/4th degree tears or a fistula. Midwives talk about episiotomy to prevent tearing they do not in my experience warn of the possible outcomes of tearing and the recovery time from large/deep episiotomies.

Ema76 at the risk of being like a dog with abone I will now leave the subject alone but I hope you are taken seriously, please take you dh/dp with you, providing he is supportive of your wishes, as sexism is alive and well amongst older male medical staff. Do plenty of research/cramming facts tonight or print stuff (reliable sources only) off the internet and take it with you if necessary.

Dismiss the option of having to pay for a c-section, you should not have to, at the end of the day it is (currently) your preferred method of giving birth and all women should be entitled to a degree of choice.