c-section a must, if refused i'll need to pay, advise on getting c-section on nhs or paying the nhs in wales, or private c-section in wales

[Ema76]

a c-section is a must for me.
i am really worried that i will be refused one on the nhs. if so i have to have options. can i pay the nhs to give me one? really want to have my baby in wales too which restricts me as it seems more private c-sections are done in London.
Does anyone know of a good private hospital in wales (south in particular) and how much it would cost?

Many thanks for your help.

i understand you are afraid even phobic about a natural delivery but what is slightly irksome is your insistance that you must have one regardless even if you have to pay for it

obstetricians are highly skilled professionals childbirth has become almost a technology and there are mny dedicated professionals who work alonbgside ensuring a safe healthy delivery-dont presume to think that purely becuse you can research and collate information and put a well worded argument forward that you have a god given right to a caesarian and whilst i appreciate you are willing to pay for private treatment that will not negate the recovery from a caesarian a caesarian is NOT the easy out and can be far more risky than childbirth - i know ive had 3! following the first and third i suffered complications and nearly died- i had to convalesce for 3 months following the 3rd baby not easy for a family with only 1 wage coming in and no family support.

tbh i resent the fact that you feel because you can pay you can dictate what way you will give birth.

sometimes the irksome phrase too posh to push really does ring true .

if you felt that strongly why become pregnanr??? i gleaned that from your phrase if you lived in another time you wouldnt have children.

Do research the c-section complications as well (I recommend Michel Odent's book). As there are different ways of having sections and not all are as good as others.

I've had 3 sections. The elective (2nd one) was the worst. In part because it was performed at 38 weeks and ds2 had a lot of problems breathing and therefore needed special care. He was not ready to be born. Apparently there is a way they can test if baby's lungs are mature but they dont routinely do it for electives in the UK. By the time of my third child when discussed (I went for VBA2C in the end- although had an in labour section for non-progression) cs vs vba2c I said that I would not agree to an elective at 38 weeks- the consultant said they wouldn't give one and I think guidelines are now 39 weeks. I still hear of people having electives at 38 weeks though for strange reasons.

I'd also read up on scar tissue. I had a terrible time with scar tissue after my first section. It made the second section very complicated and caused a lot of pain (and damaged my bladder). I have since found out that scar tissue may be reduced by wearing different types of gloves (??- something to do with latex allergies- I have a mild one). Worth finding out about as scar tissue is not fun, especially if you want more children.

just as there are women who choose to have home births, water births etc there are women who wnat cs. that is my birth plan. i have choose the acceptable method for me in the 21st century. i would indeed not have become pregnant if i had lived years ago as i simply could not go through child birth, and i do not wish to enter the competition of pain and suffering.

i can and will dictate how i have my baby. just as you have the right to.

thank you jimjams. i have also read about scars due to 'natural' childbirth. my mum tore to her anus and elsewhere.

chapstickchick, I too hate CS's, I've had three, I would do anything for a natural birth, anything, and I don't wish the recovery on anyone, but if it is a really severe psychological problem then I don't think too posh to push comes into it.

She has also said she would have to get a loan to cover it, so it's nothing to do with being 'able to pay'.

oh please don't say about prem labour. i couldn;t deal with that. trying not to think of it.

no Ema i didnt have the benefit of wealth to allow me to make the decision that i would try a natural delivery and i felt that professionals who are trained in that area had a better knowledge than me regardless of how much i researched and i respected their professional decision and advice.

i entirely hope that you do not come across with this attitude when speaking to your obstetrician as i can assure you it may well get his back up to.

• incidentally you should research the examples you offer -many women are denied home births and water births because professionals advise against it if certain criteria arent met.

I do agree about the complications of sections. I was desperate for a vagina birth with ds3 because my second (elective) section was bloody awful, the recovery was awful, there were still effects years later. Some of those problems seem to have been sorted out during the 3rd section.

I'm pleased c sections exist as I would probably not be around without them, but with a section chances are you'll be barely able to walk for longer than a week (my first one wasn't too bad, my second one I still had a catheter in days later, third one I took a long time before I could walk freely and I was on morphine in the hospital).

I think if you shut your eyes to the risks from sections (which bluntly are greater to the mother than from straightforward vaginal delivery) then you could end up at best very disappointed.

I can understand the fear. I was terrified I would die during the birth of my third child because, having had 2, I was so scared of sections. I found counselling helped, also having a friend present as well as dh, and when it was decided to give a section really telling the doctors and aneasthetists how terrified I was. The anaesthetist stayed on nearly 2 hours late to get me started and make sure I was OK.

v.s - i missed the bit about a loan

i would have to take out a loan that's how desperately i feel about it all.

"i can and will dictate how i have my baby. just as you have the right to.'

I would really recommend counseling, because really you can't. You cant dictate anything at all about motherhood. Even if you get a section there are loads of variables that you can't dictate. Childbirth is a situation in which you cannot be in total control. Get the counselling, talk it through. Whatever type of birth you end up with it'll be worth it.

the panic of all this i feel i am only going to do this once.

in life we all have choices so yes we can dicate certain things. v-birth is unpredictable to say the least. and what about emergency c-sections when things go wrong.
surely a planned c-section is better for me. i will be more relaxed and calm. better for me and baby

Sadly Ema76 I doubt you would have had the option if you had lived years ago - no contraception and not so much freedom.

I hear real fear in your post and I think any consultant will understand that you have a real phobia about this. I hope that he/she will be understanding enough to just review the pros and cons with you and then agree to a CS.

All I would say is that just because you have a CS don't necessarily assume that this removes the risks - in fact your risks of dying in or due to childbirth are higher with a CS because it is major surgery. Sadly I have had the misfortune to know someone for whom this came true. Her death was due to complications from a caesarean section and almost certainly she would still be alive if she'd had her baby vaginally.

Having said that - a planned CS which takes place under controlled circumstances will have a low risk of such an occurrence happening - the girl I knew was unlucky.

Yes we can dictate certain things. But very little to do with childbirth or parenting.

The caesarian that produced complications for me was the second (elective) one. I had the 'quick call a consultant, where is he, quick get him down here, put a call out for him, he needs to hurry up' whilst lying there with ds2 not born but everything opened. And no they would not tell me why they needed the consultant so quickly.

Even with electives you are not in control and you can't dictate anything. They chose not to tell me even though I was begging them to tell me what was wrong.

i honestly would not have had children in years gone by as i wouldn't have had sex. and mean that more than anyone knows.

re prem labour - i was booked in for an elective at 39 weeks with my second but went into labour at 37 weeks - had a few contractions and they just did my c-section then.

however my baby was poorly with breathing issues and spent a week in nicu as his lungs weren't working properly.

he was 7.5lbs at 37 weeks with a very large head and surgeon didn't think he'd have come out vaginally (same as with my first which was an emergency c-section)

you mention a poor family history of births - my mother had 2 dreadful births as did my sister and i'm also tiny with tiny feet. However the wisdom today seems to be to discard this information.

First time i really wanted a natural birth but second time i wanted an elective.

Ema, if you do have a first CS, most places will have no problem with a second, so I wouldn't worry too much about it.

Prem labour, well, if you've got an ELCS booked, they'll just do it then instead, so not to worry.

Just concentrate on seeing the consultant tomorrow, and in the mean time look into getting counselling for tokophobia, not because they will talk you out of it, but so you are not too stressed.

Do you have anxiety issues mixed up in the fear of birth as well? When I was recently suffering from anxeity problems I was convinced that if I went to the GP and they got me sorted, i.e got rid of my anxiety, then something bad would happen, and it would be my fault for letting them talk me out of it, almost as if the anxiety was my protection. Tell em if I'm way out of line, but is that an issue her too? IF so, then getting the anxiety sorted would probably make it easier for you to get your CS as they would be able to see that you had anxiety issues, which you have dealt with but are still determined to have the CS.

i am sorry you had a bad experience with you c-section jimjam.

Well ultimately it was fine. But I would really really get the counselling, because even with a section (actually more so) you have to relinquish control to others. You can't dictate anything when you're on an operating table unable to move and your guts open.

i have had anxiety of childbirth ever since i could remember.

and ultimately i should choose how i give birth when fully informed of the risks and benefits.

BUt if you were just processing risks and benefits and considering nothing else you would choose a vaginal birth because that is the safest way to give birth and the method that's the least likely to produce complications.

i think traceybath it is about money. the medical profession know that a c-section costs more initially that a v-birth even if you are torn to pieces. however the long term costs are not considered. for example my mum having an op later on due to the complications of childbirth. it can lead to stress urinary incontinence
pelvic fllor damage
postnatal depression - due to trauma of v delivery
prolapse of womb - possible hysterectomy
haemorrhoids
possible emergency c-section due to complications more risky and costly.