c-section a must, if refused i'll need to pay, advise on getting c-section on nhs or paying the nhs in wales, or private c-section in wales

[Ema76]

a c-section is a must for me.
i am really worried that i will be refused one on the nhs. if so i have to have options. can i pay the nhs to give me one? really want to have my baby in wales too which restricts me as it seems more private c-sections are done in London.
Does anyone know of a good private hospital in wales (south in particular) and how much it would cost?

Many thanks for your help.

Awful ranting, shocking really, I hope you have a thick skin and don't listen to some of the vile rubbish spouted. keep us posted re your appointments and well done for not lowering yourself to slate some of the truly horrid responses you have had.

Redhead you should be disgusted with yourself, a display which is nothing if not bullish and aggressive to say the least, vile.

Ema76 it seems that you have a fear, whether others believe it to be valid or not, it is real, and as I have pointed out on another thread before, if you are scared and worried this can cause you to labour badly, which in turn can be dangerous for you and your unborn, if it is what you need then ask, it is your right as a patient. Good luck for tomorrow.

this board is unmoderated.

that's one way in how its nature is very different from other boards.

The OP asked about c-sections on the basis that if it was refused on the NHS, that somehow if she paid for it, it would be allowed.

This is wrong on so many levels.

If her clinical need is that she needs a c-section, fine. Although at 10 weeks, it is very unlikely that her consultant will make a decision at this stage. But if refused and she offered to pay for it, this really shouldn't make a difference as the medical profession shouldn't compromise their ethics for the sake of a buck.

Either the OP is entitled to a c-section for medical reasons or not.

I haven't read the rest of this thread (internet connection slow tonight), but would like to offer you my support.

In an ideal world, we would all have great pregnancies, with no fears of childbirth and uneventful vaginal births with no complications. Your family's experiences show that this isn't an ideal world, and I can fully understand why you are frightened of a vaginal birth and would feel more at ease and in control with a C-section.

I don't normally support elective C-sections on request, but I think you have a genuine case and would be very surprised if you were turned down. I have seen women get booked in for elective C-sections for FAR less valid reasons (to fit in around holidays, etc). The decision to have a C-section may be agree early in pregnancy, but they don't tend to book it until you reach 34 weeks, and then perform it around 38 weeks.

I hope all goes well tomorrow. Don't be scared about being emotional or crying- it will be OK.

ilovemydog- I agree in principle about clinical needs be the same in NHS and private practice. However, in reality money does tend to buy you whatever you want (even if completely inappropriate) at the local golden nugget. Sad, but true.

I do no private work BTW as a matter of principle and would never use a private hospital.

I asked for an elective c section for no medical reason and my request was granted by the consultant straight away. In the end I had an em section at 32 weeks.

I haven't read all posts but there seems to be a lot of anti-elective section posting when really if a woman understands risks and benefits relevant to her it is a perfectly valid birth choice.

On the other hand I'd highlight my experience which is that you cannot control and plan for everything so if that is partly the reason that you want a section then I would still strongly suggest that you consider that things may still not go to plan and how you would deal with this.

Best of luck for your appointment.

Well, emma, if you read the rest of the thread, you'll see the OP wants a csection because then there'll be no damage to her vagina or anus because she doesn't fancy sitting with legs akimbo being stitched and once you have a vaginal birth you're 'never the same'.

She wants baby to be delivered without ever going into labour.

Thanks expat.

I based my initial response on the original post which seemed to be a genuine phobia of childbirth based on a valid experience. However, if its more a cosmetic/avoidance of a flappy fanny thing, then I'm probably less supportive.

COI- Survivor of vaginal birth, second degree tear, stitched up with legs akimbo and vagina back to normal now thank you very much.

Another survivor here! Forceps birth. Legs hiked up in stirrups, loads of stitches.

Fanny fine and functioning. Gave birth to DD2 with only a 'graze', which I actually found more painful. Road rash on the vulva. Ow.

Ema my love, I hope you get the birth you want. Your body, your choice. For what it's worth I had an awful first pregnancy because I was so scared of giving birth, in the end I had an emergency section. Second time was elective - no questions asked. Be kind to yourself and fight for what you want. And the rest of you - there are no medals earned in childbirth, at home, drug free, epidural, gas and air, c section - whatever you have as long as you and your baby/ies are ok at the end that's all you can wish for. The OP does not sound as if she would be mentally OK at the end if she had to have a VB. Now lay off and go to bed! Phew - The End.

Emma,

Ethics aside, if one wanted a c-section from Mr.Private Consultant, then one would book into a private hospital. Then, god forbid, something went wrong, then it would be an ambulance to the nearest NHS hospital.

The OP stated that she, 'had rights, as she paid her taxes' which is such a consumer viewpoint. At no stage does the OP mention a baby or any other consideration than her own.

I'm aware of what happens when the shit hits the fan post-operatively at a private hospital and have been on the receiving end of sorting out the mess from time to time when I worked in hospital. It is why I would never have an operation done privately.

Medical services (including the NHS) are increasingly consumer-driven. How often do I see people post on the health forum, 'demand this, that and the other from your doctor and if you don't get it complain'. It saddens me, but its a fact of medical practice.

I now work in the community and see women who have high risk pregnancies insist on home births also using the 'my body, my choice' and 'I have rights, I pay my taxes' arguments. It is an attitude just as reprehensible and selfish, with little thought given for the baby or how an emergency would be dealt with. The NHS would also have to pay for and staff this eventuality at the tax payers' cost. However, I feel that Ema has been given a far rougher ride here than if she had been wanting a home birth against medical advice.

For the record, in my opinion genuine phobia of childbirth may be a valid indication for a C-section on the NHS. If it is purely personal preference with no medical indication, then you should pay privately if someone is prepared to take you.

Am a mental health professional and have treated many many people with phobias.

Now, I don't know the full history here and have only read this thread, but I don't think Ema is suffering with a genuine phobia. Most people with phobias fully acknowledge that their phobia is irrational and stupid, and are usually embarassed and apologetic about it, and more than anything, don't want to be phobic any more.

Ema doesn't sound as if she doesn't want to get over her fear. She has said she would attend counselling if it meant she would get her section. At no point has she expressed the desire to see if there is anything that can be done to help her overcome this, or at least make any kind of attempt to do so.

The more I read, the more I feel this woman has issues surrounding control, and in my experience this does not bode well post natally

Ema,

to answer your original question;

If you want a section, be pleasant, ask, say please, and state your reasons, nicely. If you rant, and shout and demand you are likely to get nowhere. And I am speaking as a HCP. Most consultants are more than happy to do sections, and if you are nice and open minded and don't use the line "I will get what I want" or words to that effect, you will almost certain get your section.

As for breastfeeding. It is perfectly possible to breastfeed and work. I have done it with both of mine. Just how early are you planning on going back to work? Unless you are talking about going back after 4 or 6 weeks (which would be very inadvisable, not to mention in breach of health and safety regs, after abdominal surgery) then it's just not a valid arguement.

Monkies

There is a huge difference between someone who has been traumatised through a previous labour,someone who is phobic, and someone who can't face the loss of control that is experienced in childbirth.

Someone who has been traumatised can be helped with very specific therapy however, though of course,this does not necessarily help everyone.

at how ready some of you are to judge OP on what is essentially her choice.

What is it to you that she prefers a c-section? How is her fanny your business? How on earth can you judge the kind of mother she will be from her wish to avoid a vaginal birth?!?

Not that you need any more encouragement for a c-section, Ema, but I don't blame you for wishing to avoid this.

Needless to say I am not going to have a vaginal birth again, ever, and that has nothing to do with having 'control issues'.

Not judging either way about the C section thing but agree about the control issue. Have been through it and the sooner anyone about to have children gives up on the illusion of control - in childbirth or parenting, the happier they and their famillies will be. And the better person in my experience (OCD - actually better since dc - by neccessity). I think it is quite normal the first time and is part of the whol PFB syndrome - but I think this is quite an extreme case and I really do think counselling or CBT might be a good idea even with the C section. The birth is only the start of it!!!

To be fair to Emma, she only posted as she wanted advice about the best method as far as getting a c-section in Wales at eny cost - NHS or private.

She was then given a range of opinions about c-sections, which she didn't find to be relevant as she had already decided. Some of these experiences came from women who had c sections, and some vaginal after c section.

What I found disburbing about the OP is that despite a range of experiences, the OP did not find any of this of relevance to her; as if there was a parallel universe where women gave birth, but that she was somehow excluded because she would insist on a c-section which would avoid pain, being out of control etc.