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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

The thread for first time home birthers (or thinking about it) - over here!

993 replies

Boobz · 23/07/2008 11:53

I only just found out I was pregnant 10 days ago, and it is of course early days, but I have been doing a lot of research and am seriously thinking of having a home birth.

I'm a member of my Due March '09 ante natal club thread, but I don't want to go on about home birthing there where the majority will be planning a hospital birth (don't want to bore them!) I'd like to start this thread for all those people who'd like to talk about the pros and cons, planning, expectations and realities of home births, especially if it is your first baby, or first home birth.

Has everyone else's other halves been fine at the thought of a first baby HB? Or did you have to do some convincing?

A

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
ceb80 · 11/03/2009 16:17

Thanks Gemzooks, have 2 dogs so do lots of walking and have been doing some exercises that stick your bum in the air! Haven't tried the light or talking though, dh will really think I've lost the plot!

Trying not to worry yet but apparently they like to do ECVs at 36 weeks here which is still 4 weeks before your DD which seems a bit early...

ceb80 · 11/03/2009 16:19

Whilst I'm in a more positive frame of mind has anyone got a Birth Pool in a Box for sale? Ideally the mini as we're a bit short on space but the regular would just about fit!
Have posted on a separate thread with no luck so hopefully someone might have one on here.

RunJHC · 12/03/2009 04:13

Hi folks. Haven't posted here before but kept meaning to as also planning home birth for 1st baby. Was due on 25 March but DS decided to come early and arrived on Monday at 2305 after 18.5 hr labour - yes you guessed it - at home! So thought I would post birth story which will hopefully encourage everyone else planning to have their 1st at home.

Woke up about 4.30am on Monday with period-type pains (remember those?!) also small amount of blood. Woke DH up because too excited! We watched TV, contractions started coming every 10 mins or so, but I packed him off to work anyway just in case false start.

Called DH back at 11am by which stage contractions every 5 mins. He came home via B&Q for plastic sheeting! Was sitting on ball and breathing thru each contraction. Waters broke gradually thru morning.

Midwife (amazing, from specialist hb practice in SE London) arrived at 2pm, when I'd just got in pool. Found only 2cm dilated - felt v despondent but got out of pool to save for later, back on ball with TENS machine watching DVDs. Quite hard slog - contractions about 3 every 5 mins - but just kept distracting myself and trying not to focus on time.

Midwife came back at 7pm, by which stage I was ready for change of scene! Luckily was 5cm dilated by then so got into pool which was great. DH a complete star - kept pool warm, kept me in drinks and lucozade tabs and helped me work out way to breathe thru each contraction.

About 9.30pm, MW said see if you can feel baby's head as I was starting to push. Had a quick feel and could feel head not far up fanjo! From then on felt completely different as pushing-much easier having focus and knowing it was coming to an end! Pushed in pool till 2300, then MW suggested getting out to use gravity. Squatted with DH holding me up and then whoosh! DS arrived 5 mins later on living room floor! Only 6lb 6oz but all perfectly formed.

Had 5 min natural 3rd stage, no tearing at all and although it was bloody hard work (and in a weird way just mentally a lot tougher than I had expected), I feel tired and a bit beaten up, I am sooooo pleased to have been at home the past couple of days just having a lovely time with DS and DH.

So I really hope you all have lovely healthy babies and hopefully get the HBs you want Hope helpful/encouraging story!!

Boobz · 12/03/2009 08:15

Oh wow RunJHC - that's a fab story! I am so jealous you got your LO early! I am dying to go into labour here - am so prepared it's not true! What a lovely story - so unhurried and straight forward. And your DH sounds fab too.

Well cone you. Any name yet??

xxx

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Thefearlessfreak · 12/03/2009 09:46

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Boobz · 12/03/2009 10:09

Yes Fearless - am not known for my patience at the best of times, let alone when I have been in preparation for something for 9 months! My body is ready to get itself back too - my ribs are constantly killing me.

But sods law I will go well overdue and it will be another 3 weeks till I get to meet my babe. Takes after his father already, never early or on time! Have been bouncing on my ball for the last hour whilst watching Red Riding on Sky Plus (is dead good). Might have a nap soon though as was out walking the dog at 6am this morning!

And 40 weeks today for you! Any twinges yet?

xx

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Deaconwood · 12/03/2009 10:23

Hello,

I haven't posted on this thread before, but some of you may remember my post from a month or so ago about first-time homebirths.

Well, all went to plan and two weeks ago we had our baby at home. Just wanted to share my postive homebirth story with you all...

It started with a tiny show on Thursday afternoon (baby was due on the Saturday). I didn't want to get too excited because I'd had occasional cramping pains for about two weeks, and knew my body was gradually preparing itself. Later that evening the cramping got worse and I felt generally a bit weird (getting tetchy about dog hairs on the sofa and tidying up....). Woke at about midnight with strong contraction-like pains - stayed in bed for about an hour feeling a bit panicky - could this really be it?

Eventually woke up DH and we got up to drink tea and see what would happen. Contractions much easier when out of bed, felt much calmer - about 7 minutes apart, quickly moved to 5 minutes. We rang the Delivery Unit at about 4am to ask them to let the midwives know. Had a chat soon after with one of the team of on-call midwives. We were both calm and dealing with the contractions so we agreed that there was no need for her to come out yet.

Spend the rest of the night playing cards (great distraction, even if I had to jump down on all fours every few minutes!), and when this got too difficult alternating between bath/ball/bed. DH was great and helped talk me through contractions.

By about 7ish the contractions were 3 minutes apart - but then seemed to become more irregular, but more painful. We asked for a midwife to call in later that morning to see how we were getting on. Midwife arrived at 10 am, and contractions disappeared for her visit! However, she had a look and saw that I was 5cm dillated.

No sign of waters breaking.

When she left us, things started up again and got stronger - but still bearable. I kept active, tried to eat some toast etc. By about 2 pm, the pain had got much worse and I began to feel a bit out of my depth and wanted the reassurance of the midwives - so we called them and said we felt we needed a bit of help.

Our main midwife arrived about 40 minutes later. I'd moved up to the bedroom by this point and was glued to my birthing ball. She had a look and saw that I was 7-8 cm. The midwife was very diplomatic and left us to it as much as she could - apart from coming and checking the baby's heartbeat.

After this point things are a bit more blurry - I remember the contractions being very hard to work through. As there was only an hour of gas and air, I didn't want to waste it as I didn't know how much worse things would get. In the event I never even saw it!

Things got increasingly focused and instintive and I seem to have gone off into my own world and didn't really interact with people as I had been. Was sick a few times.

The second midwife arrived at some point.

Baby had moved to an OP position at the last moment so I ended up pushing for nearly three hours. It was the hardest thing I've ever done and by the end I wondered if it would ever be over. The midwives and my DH kept me focused by reassuring me that I didn't want to transfer at this stage...but if the pushing went on much longer we would have to (clever ploy!).

As the waters still hadn't broken - the midwives asked if I was happy to have them broken. Gabriel was born about half an hour later - beauituful and healthy, he'd been happy all through the labour!

I had an assisted third stage as I was so tired by this point. Very glad I did.

Fortunately the perineum remained intact, although I did have a tiny tear in the vaginal wall which needed a couple of stitches.

The midwives were fantastic - a good combination of support and practical common sense.

Being able to have a bath and be in my own bed afterwards was amazing!

Without a doubt the hardest thing I've ever done. I'm so glad we did it at home. I think if we'd been in hospital there would have been much more pressure to speed things up a bit and I suspect we would have had an assisted delivery.

So glad I had the chance to find out my own inner strengh/resources instead - I still can't believe I did it!

Good luck everyone.

Gemzooks · 12/03/2009 10:24

lovely lovely story RunJHC, it really gives me confidence! You did so well!

hope it kicks off for you soon boobz and fearlessfreak. with DS I had quite some warning, apparently typical for 1st babies, (2 days of contractions before anything happened), I was so excited so stayed upright the whole time waiting, but looking back wish I'd just gone off to rest! You will most probably have a good indication it's on its way soon, like a show or first contractions.. the ball is great, isn't it?

I'm 38 weeks tomorrow and going to start on the raspberry leaf tea and really do the perineal massage (not nice but I didn't tear last time and attribute it to that). the doula also said there was no harm in having a little rummage to feel the cervix to see if it was hard or soft, bit sceptical though as mine seems to move around!

does anyone else find their sleep patterns going a bit weird, like wanting to nap in the day but not sleep a full 8 hours a night? I'm wondering if it's some kind of natural preparation for getting more into a 3 hourly baby care rhythm..

Gemzooks · 12/03/2009 10:27

wow, deaconwood, just read your story, well done! I really think all mothers should get some kind of award for going through this! Just a few thousand quid from the government, and a nice plaque or something!

ceb80 · 12/03/2009 14:21

Brilliant stories Deaconwood and RunJHC, thanks so much for sharing.
Fingers crossed for Boobz and Fearless next.

RunJHC · 15/03/2009 02:08

Hi folks hope all is well and babies are on their way.

Boobz - we've called our DS George which he seems to like! Hasn't left the house yet and seems to be settling in nicely.

Deaconwood - great story! Love the idea of playing cards and hats off to you for 3 hours of pushing . Must have been completely exhausting.

Gemzooks - agree on the perineal massage front. I gave it a good go from about 35 weeks and didn't tear so def worth a shot.

Look forward to more birth stories here soon!

Boobz · 15/03/2009 19:07

Hello everyone - just checking in...

Fab name Deaconwood - George is on our list as well but I think we're going to go with Isaac (or that's the current thinking).

Fab story Deaconwood - I hope it goes as well for me! Am inspired by all these successful HBs.

Gemzooks, my sleeping is shot to pieces. I had a TERRIBLE night's sleep last night. We went to bed at about 10 and read our books for a bit and then tried to switch off and go to sleep at 11, but I then somehow managed to convince myself that the weird feelings across my tummy were braxton hicks / contractions (even though I couldn't really feel anything) so then fell half asleep convinced I was going into labour and then kept waking up on the hour every hour confused as to what I was trying to do (have a baby? sleep? ignore DH's snoring?) In the end I went downstairs and bounced on my ball for a bit (?!) and then came back to the spare bed as DH was still snoring and this was now 4am and the dog was rummaging around and keeping me awake too! So I got up completely shattered and slept for 3 hours on the sofa this afternoon during the England rugby, which will probably mean I can't sleep again tonight! Argh.

My lovely lovely midwife is off work tomorrow and Tuesday so I CAN'T go into labour until Wednesday as I don't want to have to call the on-call MW who I won't have met before.

You're overdue now Fearless, no? How's it going?

xxx

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Boobz · 15/03/2009 19:08

Sorry, that should have been fab name runJHC...

Not enough sleep...

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leakyR · 15/03/2009 20:58

Lovely stories RunJHC and Deaconwood.

Love the name George rJHC - ds1 is George Edward, we've struggled to think of another boy's name that we like as much

Boobz - I hope you get some rest tonight and continue to do so before baby makes an appearance.

Boobz · 16/03/2009 09:14

Thanks Leaky - another terrible night's sleep last night but don't seem to be too worse off for it. Am off to a photo shoot today actually - a friend is doing the PR for an infant mortality charity (African, or some such) and they're taking a press release photo with loads of sleb mums and sleb preggers people, but they also wanted some real people as well, so off I go! I look huge so God knows if they will try and hide me behind some of the sleeker mums-to-be! Still, getting make up done and generally looked after for the day so it should be fun! Will post the pic on here afterwards (and it should be in some of the broadsheets as well).

You still with us Fearless?

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ceb80 · 16/03/2009 20:24

Sounds like fun Boobz! How did it go?

Had scan at hospital today as midwife concerned about breech presentation but scan showed he's head down and ready for action (well not quite but head down anyway!) Am so pleased as it means I can have my homebirth eventhough registrar was gobsmacked when I mentioned it. Her exact words were "why on earth would you want to do that?" They said it was against hospital policy as I have a dormant medical condition but they couldn't stop me.

Boobz · 16/03/2009 20:51

It was fun! If a bit tiring...

What's your dormant medical condition?

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ceb80 · 16/03/2009 22:08

Nosey! I have 2! Ulcerative colitis which has been dormant since 1st trimester and depression (undiagnosed poss bipolar). They're fine with the colitis but apparently labour can bring on a bipolar episode. I did try to explain that dh would bring me straight down if that happened and that I couldn't see how actually delivering in hospital would affect that.

Boobz · 17/03/2009 07:35

Oh god sorry - I didn't realise I was being nosey? I thought MN was license to know all your deepest darkest secrets...

Interesting you talk about the bipolar thing... something similar (I think, but not sure) happened to DH's mum during labour (but more unipolar rather than bipolar - the manic side).

Twinging back ache this morning... could I have a ST Patricks's baby (pretty please)! DH and put up the pool last night which was funny - he did it in the buff because he so happened to have not got dressed again after showering following a bike ride, so he was assembling said Pool in a Box naked, and the dog was very interested to know if we were all going to get in the pool for a swim, but in the end it took half an hour just to fill it up half way, so we started to empty it again. Anyway, at least it's up now! Just need to clean the house from top to bottom again (it's been over 2 weeks since my last proper clean and no baby has turned up... dammit).

xxx

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Boobz · 17/03/2009 07:36

Latest bump photo up on profile as well - let's hope the next pic is of a baby!!

Where's Fearless got to?

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Thefearlessfreak · 17/03/2009 19:39

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Gemzooks · 17/03/2009 20:02

well done fearless, look forward to reading birth story!
and well done for standing up to the hospital a bit! you do have to, to get yourself heard.

ceb80, I am reading two very hippyish books but they are really good for positive thinking stuff and strategies to get through labour mentally, it is Ina May's Guide to Childbirth and Birthing from Within.. I tend to get very negative and anxious, and really find it helps to be armed with some positive stuff, especially songs/mantras/pictures to focus on or whatever.

boobz, hope you enjoyed the photo shoot, nice to have a bit of glamour, especially at this stage!

one of the mothers at my son's nursery came up and said (in Dutch), 'You have an enormous stomach!' Don't you just love those comments..

ceb80 · 17/03/2009 20:54

Congratulations fearless! That's half the reason why I want a home birth, because I think I'll feel more confident than in hospital.
Gemzooks, some others have mentioned those books too so will keep an eye out for them on ebay.
Boobz was only joking, people tend to shy away from bipolar so it was quite refreshing!

raindroprhyme · 17/03/2009 21:59

lurker here

can't wait to hear about mini boobz arrival good luck!

just had to comment on your dh's pic on your profile
does he have a black eye?

Boobz · 18/03/2009 06:39

Yes - black eye from playing rugby!

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