The thread for first time home birthers (or thinking about it) - over here!

[Boobz]

I only just found out I was pregnant 10 days ago, and it is of course early days, but I have been doing a lot of research and am seriously thinking of having a home birth.

I'm a member of my Due March '09 ante natal club thread, but I don't want to go on about home birthing there where the majority will be planning a hospital birth (don't want to bore them!) I'd like to start this thread for all those people who'd like to talk about the pros and cons, planning, expectations and realities of home births, especially if it is your first baby, or first home birth.

Has everyone else's other halves been fine at the thought of a first baby HB? Or did you have to do some convincing?

A

thanks all! I suppose for me it's the other way round as here in Holland you feel you have to justify going to hospital, the midwives assume you'll be at home and loads of people have homebirths, and they're very casual about it. Heard stories of midwives cajoling women to stay at home by saying they weren't as far on as they actually were in the labour etc! Here there's this tradition of being very stoic and brave about birth, all natural, which is great I suppose but it's pushed a bit too hard..

can't WAIT for mat leave, will only take it from 38 weeks, but working at home most days now anyway cos of SPD, thought that would be less stressful but it's worse because of colleagues skyping all the time..

Hi

i've been lurking for a bit while I convinced dh that he really wanted a hb too.

Found a list know it's not up to date but have added myself to it.

leakyR, 28 weeks. 1 DS (Apr 07), planning home water birth, due May 7th.
Gemzooks, 31 weeks pregnant, live in Holland, 1 DS 2.5, planning first home birth with pool, due 29 March
Swottybetty. 29/05/09. 1 DD (march 08). croydon surrey
CEB80 28 weeks, Due 23/4/09, planning 1st home water birth
Boobz, 33 weeks, due 19th March, planning 1st home water birth, Streatham London
Helley, 39 weeks, 1st baby, planning HB
twocutedarlings, 36wks (tomorrow) and due on the 30th of Jan, hoping for DC3 to be born at home
captain karvol, 33 weeks, 2nd DC
Belgianchocolates, 26weeks, due 6th May, dc3 1st home birth, a water one hopefully

welcome leaky,

I've added my update...

leakyR, 28 weeks. 1 DS (Apr 07), planning home water birth, due May 7th.
Gemzooks, 34 weeks pregnant, live in Holland, 1 DS 2.5, planning first home birth with pool, due 29 March
Swottybetty. 29/05/09. 1 DD (march 08). croydon surrey
CEB80 28 weeks, Due 23/4/09, planning 1st home water birth
Boobz, 33 weeks, due 19th March, planning 1st home water birth, Streatham London
Helley, 39 weeks, 1st baby, planning HB
twocutedarlings, 36wks (tomorrow) and due on the 30th of Jan, hoping for DC3 to be born at home
captain karvol, 33 weeks, 2nd DC
Belgianchocolates, 26weeks, due 6th May, dc3 1st home birth, a water one hopefully

Have added mine too

leakyR, 28 weeks. 1 DS (Apr 07), planning home water birth, due May 7th.
Gemzooks, 34 weeks pregnant, live in Holland, 1 DS 2.5, planning first home birth with pool, due 29 March
Swottybetty. 29/05/09. 1 DD (march 08). croydon surrey
CEB80 31 weeks, Due 23/4/09, planning 1st home water birth
Boobz, 33 weeks, due 19th March, planning 1st home water birth, Streatham London
Helley, 39 weeks, 1st baby, planning HB
twocutedarlings, 36wks (tomorrow) and due on the 30th of Jan, hoping for DC3 to be born at home
captain karvol, 33 weeks, 2nd DC
Belgianchocolates, 26weeks, due 6th May, dc3 1st home birth, a water one hopefully

oh and welcome leaky Have you had your dh read the post further down the page about convincing partners re homebirths. Mine was already fairly onside but said it really helped him to see it positively!

Okay I hope people don't mind, but I have gone to the liberty of tidying up the list a bit... have taken out how far along we are in weeks as this changes too often, and have re-ordered us into the order we are due. Can you tell I'm on maternity leave?!

Updated list:

ARRIVED:
Tupperware 3 FEB, Baby boy (name??) Good hospital delivery as had to transfer due to snow.
Givethedogahomebirth 10 FEB, Baby girl Isla Rose.
DUE:
Helley, DUE NOW! Planning HB.
Twocutedarlings DUE 25 FEB. Hoping for DC3 to be born at home.
Laumiere DUE 10 MARCH. 1 DS already.
captain karvol, DUE 15 MARCH. 2nd DC.
Boobz, DUE 19 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth. Live Streatham, London.
CEB80 Due 23 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth.
Gemzooks DUE 29 MARCH planning first home birth with pool. Live in Holland, 1 DS already (2.5).
Belgianchocolates DUE 6 MAY. Planning home water birth. 2DC already.
leakyR DUE 7 MAY , planning home water birth. 1 DS already (Apr 07).
Swottybetty DUE 29 MAY. Live in Croydon, Surrey. 1 DD already (March 08).

ARRIVED:

Tupperware 3 FEB, Baby boy (name??) Good hospital delivery as had to transfer due to snow.
Givethedogahomebirth 10 FEB, Baby girl Isla Rose.

DUE:

Helley, DUE NOW! Planning HB.
Twocutedarlings DUE 25 FEB. Hoping for DC3 to be born at home.
Laumiere DUE 10 MARCH. 1 DS already.
captain karvol, DUE 15 MARCH. 2nd DC.
Boobz, DUE 19 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth. Live Streatham, London.
CEB80 Due 23 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth.
Gemzooks DUE 29 MARCH planning first home birth with pool. Live in Holland, 1 DS already (2.5).
Belgianchocolates DUE 6 MAY. Planning home water birth. 2DC already.
leakyR DUE 7 MAY , planning home water birth. 1 DS already (Apr 07).
Swottybetty DUE 29 MAY. Live in Croydon, Surrey. 1 DD already (March 08).

hello all,

I've been watching home waterbirth videos on YouTube. Now there's an experience (never used YouTube before this).

Anyone else been, um, educating themselves this way? I don't know what to think (apart from that there are some immature idiots out there commenting on the clips.) I'm not sure it's helping me, but I barely remember anything from DS's birth as I was so exhausted and drugged, so I feel the need for more information...

I did the whole youtube thing way back when I was first pregnant (about 10 weeks I think) and even looked for an episiotomy and c-section video. I'm weird I know.

Hasn't put me off though!

hey everyone!

O my gosh.....well baby Evlyn Grace was delivered by emergency episomtosy at 1.19pm on Thursday 12th Feb weighing 6lb 3oz. Not the planned homebirth I had hoped for and the experience has left me some what emotional.

This is how events happened:

11.30pm Tuesday - water broke
12-4am Wednesday - contractions every 3 minutes and pretty strong so Midwife comes out and after an hour things die down.
4-7am Wed- try and sleep through contractions every 10-15mins
10am Wed- things have slowed right down
2pm Wed - everything has stopped
2-6pm Wed - try and have a rest but start to get MASSIVE contractions every 30 minutes
6pm-11pm - MASSIVE contractions every 5-7minutes and not coping with the pain. Midwife gets called out.
12am Thursday - Midwife arrives, only 3 cm dilated!! Start on Gas and air which wasn't helping because everytime I felt a contraction it was on top of me before I could breath the stuff in to make it work!
2am Thur - Midwifes check 5cm dilate but cos contractions so big baby's heart rate kept dropping to below 100bpm so ambulance called and was taken to hospital.
3am-8am Thurs - in a world of my own!! Hooked up to the contraction monitor which helped me use the gas and air correctly.
8am Thurs - Finally at 10 cms dilated.
8-10.30am Thurs - Pushing and still no sign of baby! Drip put in cos really dehydrated, cathitor also used to drain my bladder...not a pleasant experience.
11am Thurs - plan of action is to increase contractions again artifically and then take me to threate to pull the baby out by forceps, with a spinal block put in place for the pain.
11.30-12.30 Thur - hooked up to induction drug, but still not in threate and the pain was something I've never experienced before in my life, by heart rate dropped and I went into shock!
12.30pm Thurs - DP grabs one of the consultants and shouts to take me into theatre NOW - a new theatre is set up especially and I'm taken in and given the pain relief required! Baby born after 3 attempts to pull her out by forceps but she was in good sharp when she came out.

I know this is probably not the birthing story you wanted to read and I was hesitant to even write this, but all I would say is be realistic....if the pain is too much or you need to be transfered, do so! No one gives you a medal at the end of it for staying at home and the most important thing is to get your baby out safely.

The care I received from the midwives at the hospital was second to none....but the consultants decisions were awful!

I've been quite hard on myself the last few days because I didn't deliver at home, but even if baby's heart rate was ok, I still would of have to be transfered because she wouldn't come out.

xx

Oh Helley! You sound like you've been through the mill! I know it's not the birth you wanted, but WELL DONE! You've got a healthy baby girl (with a beautiful name!) and now you can enjoy the REAL part of having a baby -- being a mum. The labour and birth bit are important yes, but you've done it now and it sounds like you couldn't have done anything else than what you did to get the baby out safely.

I'm glad you did post the real story as it happens to so many people planning HBs and it's important to see all sides of the possible story. I hope you're recovering well, and that Evelyn is coming along nicely.

I still hope to have a serene water birth at home, but am thankful to have your positive-ending story in my mind so I can be prepared if things don't go my way.

Welcome Evelyn! Pictures please! xxx

thanks Boobz, I really appreciate your thoughts!

Will get photos on asap.

x

Congratulations Helley !!

WOW you have done so so well, please dont be disappointed you have had a very difficult labour and managed on just G&A right up until needing forceps!! my god woman IMO you should get a medal, wine, chocolate the works!!, !!! you have done bloody amazingly well!!

well done Helley! You've done really well and it sounds like a very hard labour indeed, and hospital was the best place in this instance, though I'm sorry they didn't manage it better Congratulations on your lovely little girl!

Captain Karvol, I scared myself silly watching homebirths on youtube, either they were these unbelievably serene women in the tub, barely seeming to be in pain, or it was the full business end view and made me think yikes, thank God I couldn't see it from that end at the time!

Well done Helley! That sounds like such hard work, you must have been exhausted.

I know it's not the 'perfect home birth', but it's great that you posted, and I hope you can come to a place where you can say, 'hey, she's gorgeous, I did the absolute best thing for her and she's here safe and sound'.

(that's speaking as someone who had a birth by ventouse, feet in stirrups, episiotomy etc partly due to foetal distress,btw.)

And thank you, fellow YouTube watchers. I just saw this insanely serene hypnobirthing home water birth woman, and couldn't relate to it at all - she just kind of sighed, and out popped the baby. Ha! Mainly there seems to be a lot of very pained high pitched squealing from the mothers though...

Thank you for all your postings! Its made me feel a load better! xx

I, too, also watched some of the youtube homebirths and thought that it was going to be a piece of p*ss.....o how wrong I was

Just in case there are other people reading this, even though I went through the mill and back, it has not stopped me from wanting another homebirth next time around. I now know what labour is like and how my body deals with the contractions....it's strangely given me a sense of confidence for next time because I've done it once before....

Congratulations Helley, so glad you posted your story as it shows the other side and how you have to be adaptable. I would love a home birth but likewise am not going to chain myself to the house if I need a hospital transfer.

Evelyn Grace is a beautiful name, will she be an Evie? I know a lovely Eva so am biased!

Boobz have updated the list as I'm due on the 23rd April not March (I wish!!)

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Mumsnet Discussions: Childbirth : The thread for first time home birthers (or thinking about it) - over here! (720 messages)
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I only just found out I was pregnant 10 days ago, and it is of course early days, but I have been doing a lot of research and am seriously thinking of having a home birth.

I'm a member of my Due March '09 ante natal club thread, but I don't want to go on about home birthing there where the majority will be planning a hospital birth (don't want to bore them!) I'd like to start this thread for all those people who'd like to talk about the pros and cons, planning, expectations and realities of home births, especially if it is your first baby, or first home birth.

Has everyone else's other halves been fine at the thought of a first baby HB? Or did you have to do some convincing?

A
...less
Original Post - By Boobz on Wed 23-Jul-08 11:53:23
I only just found out I was pregnant 10 days ago, and it is of course early days, but I have been doing a lot of research and ...more
" By Tupperwife on Tue 17-Feb-09 10:02:24
Gemzooks A bit sneaky, but one of our reasons for booking a home birth was that the hospital team treat you differently if you end up on the ward; you're still less likely to have instrumental birth, emergency C section etc than the 'regular' labouring women. Our Trust reckon half of homebirth bookings end up in hospital (most for pain relief cos you can only have entonox or pethidine at home) so this was a big factor for us. And it worked, I got the physiological third stage I was after, and had only 1 internal exam during the labour.

The midwives actually offered me the 6 hour discharge protocol (I had no idea that it existed) so we got to go home and sleep in our bed after only 9 hours total in hospital. that we managed to play the system so well, and that more Mums don't go for it.
By Gemzooks on Tue 17-Feb-09 19:16:49
thanks all! I suppose for me it's the other way round as here in Holland you feel you have to justify going to hospital, the midwives assume you'll be at home and loads of people have homebirths, and they're very casual about it. Heard stories of midwives cajoling women to stay at home by saying they weren't as far on as they actually were in the labour etc! Here there's this tradition of being very stoic and brave about birth, all natural, which is great I suppose but it's pushed a bit too hard..

can't WAIT for mat leave, will only take it from 38 weeks, but working at home most days now anyway cos of SPD, thought that would be less stressful but it's worse because of colleagues skyping all the time..
By leakyR on Tue 17-Feb-09 20:53:12
Hi

i've been lurking for a bit while I convinced dh that he really wanted a hb too.

Found a list know it's not up to date but have added myself to it.

leakyR, 28 weeks. 1 DS (Apr 07), planning home water birth, due May 7th.
Gemzooks, 31 weeks pregnant, live in Holland, 1 DS 2.5, planning first home birth with pool, due 29 March
Swottybetty. 29/05/09. 1 DD (march 08). croydon surrey
CEB80 28 weeks, Due 23/4/09, planning 1st home water birth
Boobz, 33 weeks, due 19th March, planning 1st home water birth, Streatham London
Helley, 39 weeks, 1st baby, planning HB
twocutedarlings, 36wks (tomorrow) and due on the 30th of Jan, hoping for DC3 to be born at home
captain karvol, 33 weeks, 2nd DC
Belgianchocolates, 26weeks, due 6th May, dc3 1st home birth, a water one hopefully
By Gemzooks on Tue 17-Feb-09 20:58:58
welcome leaky,

I've added my update...

leakyR, 28 weeks. 1 DS (Apr 07), planning home water birth, due May 7th.
Gemzooks, 34 weeks pregnant, live in Holland, 1 DS 2.5, planning first home birth with pool, due 29 March
Swottybetty. 29/05/09. 1 DD (march 08). croydon surrey
CEB80 28 weeks, Due 23/4/09, planning 1st home water birth
Boobz, 33 weeks, due 19th March, planning 1st home water birth, Streatham London
Helley, 39 weeks, 1st baby, planning HB
twocutedarlings, 36wks (tomorrow) and due on the 30th of Jan, hoping for DC3 to be born at home
captain karvol, 33 weeks, 2nd DC
Belgianchocolates, 26weeks, due 6th May, dc3 1st home birth, a water one hopefully
By ceb80 on Tue 17-Feb-09 22:39:12
Have added mine too

leakyR, 28 weeks. 1 DS (Apr 07), planning home water birth, due May 7th.
Gemzooks, 34 weeks pregnant, live in Holland, 1 DS 2.5, planning first home birth with pool, due 29 March
Swottybetty. 29/05/09. 1 DD (march 08). croydon surrey
CEB80 31 weeks, Due 23/4/09, planning 1st home water birth
Boobz, 33 weeks, due 19th March, planning 1st home water birth, Streatham London
Helley, 39 weeks, 1st baby, planning HB
twocutedarlings, 36wks (tomorrow) and due on the 30th of Jan, hoping for DC3 to be born at home
captain karvol, 33 weeks, 2nd DC
Belgianchocolates, 26weeks, due 6th May, dc3 1st home birth, a water one hopefully

oh and welcome leaky Have you had your dh read the post further down the page about convincing partners re homebirths. Mine was already fairly onside but said it really helped him to see it positively!
By Boobz on Wed 18-Feb-09 09:43:12
Okay I hope people don't mind, but I have gone to the liberty of tidying up the list a bit... have taken out how far along we are in weeks as this changes too often, and have re-ordered us into the order we are due. Can you tell I'm on maternity leave?!
By Boobz on Wed 18-Feb-09 09:43:28
Updated list:

ARRIVED:
Tupperware 3 FEB, Baby boy (name??) Good hospital delivery as had to transfer due to snow.
Givethedogahomebirth 10 FEB, Baby girl Isla Rose.
DUE:
Helley, DUE NOW! Planning HB.
Twocutedarlings DUE 25 FEB. Hoping for DC3 to be born at home.
Laumiere DUE 10 MARCH. 1 DS already.
captain karvol, DUE 15 MARCH. 2nd DC.
Boobz, DUE 19 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth. Live Streatham, London.
CEB80 Due 23 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth.
Gemzooks DUE 29 MARCH planning first home birth with pool. Live in Holland, 1 DS already (2.5).
Belgianchocolates DUE 6 MAY. Planning home water birth. 2DC already.
leakyR DUE 7 MAY , planning home water birth. 1 DS already (Apr 07).
Swottybetty DUE 29 MAY. Live in Croydon, Surrey. 1 DD already (March 08).
By Boobz on Wed 18-Feb-09 09:44:03
ARRIVED:

Tupperware 3 FEB, Baby boy (name??) Good hospital delivery as had to transfer due to snow.
Givethedogahomebirth 10 FEB, Baby girl Isla Rose.

DUE:

Helley, DUE NOW! Planning HB.
Twocutedarlings DUE 25 FEB. Hoping for DC3 to be born at home.
Laumiere DUE 10 MARCH. 1 DS already.
captain karvol, DUE 15 MARCH. 2nd DC.
Boobz, DUE 19 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth. Live Streatham, London.
CEB80 Due 23 APRIL. Planning 1st home water birth.
Gemzooks DUE 29 MARCH planning first home birth with pool. Live in Holland, 1 DS already (2.5).
Belgianchocolates DUE 6 MAY. Planning home water birth. 2DC already.
leakyR DUE 7 MAY , planning home water birth. 1 DS already (Apr 07).
Swottybetty DUE 29 MAY. Live in Croydon, Surrey. 1 DD already (March 08).

Well, having had the nice MW who was very pro-HB, had a different MW yesterday who was very nihilistic about me having a successful HB with a posterior baby. I think even if it means a longer, harder labour, I'd still rather be at home for it!

Congrats helley!

laumiere, do you mean baby is currently back to back? As far as I know, it doesn't signify that much now, as they can turn in labour. Of course you can do all the optimum foetal positioning stuff, but I'm cynical, since my DS was born OP, and I did everything possible for good positioning from 20 weeks on, never slouching, swimming a lot, sitting up straight and forward, BUT during the long drawn out hospital birth I ended up lying on my back for a lot of it, with epidural etc, and I'm convinced that was what made him go OP.

Having said that, I also agree with you, a longer labour etc is no better in the hospital, in fact the opposite! My labour took 3 days and I wish I'd been at home.

On the plus side, maybe not because DS was OP, but I think it was, I had no tearing or stitches, because of the angle his head came out, it just happened to be a good angle. so not all bad...

Congratulations Helley! Well done on your beautiful baby.

Please can I add myself to the list?

ARRIVED:
Tupperware 3 FEB, Baby boy (name??) Good hospital delivery as had to transfer due to snow.
Givethedogahomebirth 10 FEB, Baby girl Isla Rose.
Helley, Baby born 12 Feb
DUE:
Twocutedarlings DUE 25 FEB. Hoping for DC3 to be born at home.
Laumiere DUE 10 MARCH. 1 DS already.
captain karvol, DUE 15 MARCH. 2nd DC.
Boobz, DUE 19 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth. Live Streatham, London.
CEB80 Due 23 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth.
Gemzooks DUE 29 MARCH planning first home birth with pool. Live in Holland, 1 DS already (2.5).
Gingersarah, norbury london, due 18 April and hoping for HB
Belgianchocolates DUE 6 MAY. Planning home water birth. 2DC already.
leakyR DUE 7 MAY , planning home water birth. 1 DS already (Apr 07).
Swottybetty DUE 29 MAY. Live in Croydon, Surrey. 1 DD already (March 08).

God, don't know what I did to my post above sorry! will try again as I'm due April not March.

ARRIVED:
Tupperware 3 FEB, Baby boy (name??) Good hospital delivery as had to transfer due to snow.
Givethedogahomebirth 10 FEB, Baby girl Isla Rose.
Helley, Evelyn Grace Baby girl born 12 Feb

DUE:
Twocutedarlings DUE 25 FEB. Hoping for DC3 to be born at home.
Laumiere DUE 10 MARCH. 1 DS already.
Thefearlessfreak Due 12 March 1ds 2.4 yrs & planning for homebirth
captain karvol, DUE 15 MARCH. 2nd DC.
Boobz, DUE 19 MARCH. Planning 1st home water birth. Live Streatham, London.
CEB80 Due 23 APRIL. Planning 1st home water birth.
Gemzooks DUE 29 MARCH planning first home birth with pool. Live in Holland, 1 DS already (2.5).
Gingersarah, norbury london, due 18 April and hoping for HB
Belgianchocolates DUE 6 MAY. Planning home water birth. 2DC already.
leakyR DUE 7 MAY , planning home water birth. 1 DS already (Apr 07).
Swottybetty DUE 29 MAY. Live in Croydon, Surrey. 1 DD already (March 08).