The thread for first time home birthers (or thinking about it) - over here!

[Boobz]

I only just found out I was pregnant 10 days ago, and it is of course early days, but I have been doing a lot of research and am seriously thinking of having a home birth.

I'm a member of my Due March '09 ante natal club thread, but I don't want to go on about home birthing there where the majority will be planning a hospital birth (don't want to bore them!) I'd like to start this thread for all those people who'd like to talk about the pros and cons, planning, expectations and realities of home births, especially if it is your first baby, or first home birth.

Has everyone else's other halves been fine at the thought of a first baby HB? Or did you have to do some convincing?

A

I'm 16 weeks and even before I was pregnant, I was thinking of having the baby at home (we were trying for 2 1/2 years). I think it's calmer, cleaner and quieter than being in a hospital, and I know that I should have the same people with me all the way through.

Like most people, I know I can't book my delivery to be how I want it, but my theory is that if I plan for the best and prepare for the worst, I'll be set... I'm hopping for a waterbirth, as it will help with pain relief, I feel at home in the water, it's a less shocking birth for baby (coming from dark watery tummy to a dark watery pool has to be the best birth) and it will contain the mess!!!!

I am using NHS midwife's and throughout the midwife and doctor at my GP's surgery have been brilliant, and I have had some issues in very early pregnancy - they're still supportive and I'm really happy.

My hubby is really supportive although a bit concerned, and most people have been surprised, but I haven't had any negative reactions apart from my 93 year old /gran, who has a negative reaction to everything!!!!

Sounds perfect (so far!) mrsy -- you sound very similar to me. I am still waiting for my booking in appointment but hopefully I will get that sorted this week.

And Gabriel is a lovely name ;)

Well I am off for a scan this afternoon because the midwife has found that the head is not presenting properly. It is kind of in the right hip socket area.

if they could ever make one for me.

Thanks Boobz.

I'm having a scan tomorrow, so we'll see if all the worrying is for nothing!!!!

I think my main reason's for hb are that I feel I will have a bit more control, and I think being able to say "can you turn the lights down" "can you turn the music up" etc will make me more comfortable. Also won't have to stick to hospital protocals - a friend was told that if she wasn't 10 cm in the next ten minutes (after contracting for hours) she would have to have a c-section. Talk about pressure!

Also, Maidstone hospital has to be the scankiest place in the world. When I went for my 12 week scan, was sitting waiting and flicking though magazines, and saw an article by Cheryl Baker about her mil dying of MRSA / c.diff at Maidstone Hospital. Did not fill me with confidence. And although I'm not a clean freak I know my house is clean, and that any germs here I'm living in how, will have antibodies, and the baby will live in so must be better than hospital.

Plus - how scary must that first drive home be?!

foxytocin fingers crossed things are ok...

Good News Update: had a scan. the midwife was wrong apparently. Baby is head down and 2/5 engaged. The consultant thinks she was feeling a shoulder. durrr.

My doula said what I have had in the back of my head all along, because it is a home birth, they are panicking a bit expecting something to go wrong around every corner.

Hi all, I'm very late coming into this as I'm 37+4 now but I'm all booked in for a homebirth

The community midwife came out and filled loads of forms in and gave me the ok but didn't really say anything else. My antenatel appts have been at my doctors with a different team of midwives. The comm m/w asked if i was still ok to go there for check ups and when I said yes just said good. Does this mean I won't see the comm m/w again before I go into labour? I also have to phone the hospital to tell them I'm in labour and they will tell the comm m/w, is that normal?

Sorry to just jump in with all these questions but I don't know anyone else who has had a successful homebirth in the past 30years.

Yes I had to phone the hospital because that was where the community midwives had a 'base'. Then they arranged for the on call midwife to ring me and attend. I didn't have to ring the normal delivery ward though. Does that make sense?

Finally have my booking in appointment tomorrow with the MW team at Tommies so I can talk about my HB etc. I'm 13+2 today -- is that particularly late to not have had your booking in appointment? Feels like it to me.

Went to pregnant yoga last night and borrowed a home water birth DVD. Is everyone who is planning a HB also planning to have a pool? Which one should I get?

glad to see this thread again. 34 weeks and breech so please all keep fingers crossed that it turns!

having a pool but will see if it feels right on the day re giving birht in there. I borrowed my cousings, its from birthpoolinabox or something like that.

another question for homebirthers thinking of having a birthing pool - where are you putting it? i ask because our builder laughed when i said it was going in the spare room... to which he said "falling through the ceiling is one way of giving birth i suppose"

Hi WP,

I intend to keep this thread going all the way through until I pop in March next year! And hope that all the people on here come back and post their stories, whether they ended up going into hospital or not.

DH and I were talking about where to put the pool last night. It makes most sense in the kitchen I suppose, given it's on a slate floor there, but I think I would prefer in my spare bedroom or living room.

Have just watched the Janet Whats-her-chops water birthing video. Was made in 1992 and boy could you tell! I was going to show it to my DH but not sure now... the hairy armpits and classical guitar in the background music might all be a bit too hippy for him. I like the look of the second birth though - I was fast forwarding through the longer labour bits and out it popped when I wasn't even looking! She looked like she had just taken a rather satisfying number 2 rather than a baby. Hope mine goes like that!

hi girls - haven't been on this thread in ages but seeing boobz last night reminded me!

got my 34 wk appt tomorrow so hopefully baby is still head down, still no problems that I know abut so fingers crossed we stay complication free then hopefully will be able to book in my homebirth next week!

we're not going to get a pool, simply because I rent a 2nd floor flat so any accidents just don't bear thinking about, also I don't think any room is big enough really!

have started to get together my just in case bag, have done another thread on it but just in case, here's mine, would be so grateful if anyone can add or take away:

FOR LABOUR
cooling spray
clary sage
flannels
flip flops
big towell
big bottle water
lip balm

POST LABOUR
nursing bra (x2?)
nursing PJ's/nightie (or best to chuck in stuff I don't mind being ruined?)
make up/hairbrush/toiletries
camera
nipple cream
breast pads
maternity pads (+tea tree & lavender oil)
cheap knickers (hate disposable ones)
baby vests (newborn and 0-3)
babygros (newborn and 0-3)
baby hat
newborn nappies
snowsuit
going home clothes for me and baby

oh and fingers crossed angelpoise for tomorrow!!!

gwtmh - i'd add energy bar/sweets as i've seen that on a lot of lists, and magazine/book in case it's a long labour (sorry!) or for after.

also would just take vest thing for you in case you get hot and want to strip off without being nude...

also money and address book to call friends and family.

Gosh you are good mousey -- so glad to have you doing this all before me so I can pick your brains from start to finish!

Looking forward to seeing that newborn list as well (sorry for stealing everything!)

See you at yoga next Tuesday

xx

Hi all. Im 33 weeks and planning a home birth, problem is, Ive only just decided in the past two weeks that this is really what I want to do, so the midwife is yet to learn this new piece of information, I have an appointment next week so hopefully that will go well.....anyone had any experiences with nhs midwifes/homebirth in Liverpool?

Its my third pregnancy, the other two girls were induced so Im really hoping that this one goes differently.....Im also hoping to borrow my friends birth pool but we'll see, all these plans...lol

So, as its my first time does anyone have a ny good tips?? Im gonna use old towels, I have plenty so thats not a problem, I dont want to use a tens machine, they dont agree with me. Im presuming they will bring gas and air with them, but I guess that will be the only pain relief I will use, saying that if my other births are anything to go by (1st one was 5 hrs, 2nd one was 18 mins) then I should'nt be in pain for too long =)

Anyways,I have been reading this thread for a while now and just wanted to say hello, hope to speak to you more in the next 6-7 weeks.

Laura
x

Laura, from what I've read you'll need a few layers of waterproof stuff - just go to homebase and get the underlay for laminate flooring. Also, newspaper is great as the ink is anti-bacterial. Not sure what layer that goes, under the towels i think.

MWs bring gas and air with them and you can order a prescription of pethadine if you want it. They can then give it to you.

I've told my MW all along that I'm aiming for a homebirth, and if you use the NHS community MWs, the whole thing is the same as a hospital birth until about 36 weeks when they get you to fill in some forms. I guess that's what they'll do in Liverpool. then they come to the house and give you a list of stuff you need to provide and go into further details.

It might be worth trying to call her iun advance of your appointment to warn her, just in case she needs some notice to prepare the forms etc.

I had a good appointment today - chatted to my midwife about having a home birth, and she was really positive and put my mind at rest with some of the things I was worrying about. My main worry is always that something might be wrong with the baby after birth, and there'll be a delay getting to hospital. She said she'd raised this on one of her training courses, and the consultant paediatricians had all been really positive and pointed out that a midwife at home (and potentially in an ambulance) will be doing exactly the same as anyone would in a hospital. Nice to know even the doctors are on the side of it being perfectly safe!

Foxytocin, that is good news from the scan, flaming midwives! Like you say, they seem to look for things that could be or might go wrong.

Boobz & Angelpoise, how did it go today?!

Wombleprincess, sending lots of head down vibes!

Hi Lauraw78! I "met" you on the November board. Like I said, I only decided that I would like a homebirth at about 29/30 weeks. I saw my midwife on Monday, when I was 32+5 and reminded her of what I had already told her on the phone, about how I wanted a homebirth. She didn't outright say no, but I felt she was looking for ways to perhaps get out of it. They are currently trying to scare me with the big baby/shoulder dystocia thing, but I told her that no matter what the measurements and even scans say at this point, I carried my other boys exactly the same and they were very average weights, 8lb 1oz and 7lb 13oz. I reckong this baby could be 9 -9 1/2lb born, but not the 10lb + they think I may have. Just go in with the "I won't take no for an answer" attitude. My midwife could tell very quickly I wasn't going to back down and went from telling me baby was huge, to plotting the estimated weight from a scan last week to tell me he wasn't as big as they thought and that if another growth scan at 36 weeks showed an average size, I could have my homebirth. Fingers crossed!

Purpleflower, I wish I could offer advice about who to call, but am unsure myself. I am guessing I would still need to call the hospital as the community midwives are based there. It seems I may fall lucky in that my community midwife gave the impression she is one of the homebirthing midwives too as said she would possible be on call and available from 37 weeks.

Rhian82, that is great news and definately eases some fears that I am sure must cross most minds at some point.

Hi all,
Haven't been on in a while, but I'm still on track for a hb, assuming my 34 week scan and GBS swab are both clear [fingers crossed emoticon] I'm currently 32+5 and the CMW is coming round a week on Sunday to chat to DH and I about hb. From what I understand they explain what might require a transfer to hospital so that you've got plenty of time to digest the information rather than having to deal with it whilst in labour. Hopefully she'll also tell me what will be provided and what I need to buy.
WP I'm planning to use a pool and DH and I are going to a NCT waterbirth workshop this Sunday. We saw a birthpoolinabox inflated at our AN class and it was lovely and roomy but private too IYSWIM so I think I'll be getting one of those. It will be downstairs in the living room - the mw did say that it was easier to be on the ground floor, just in case a transfer to hospital was required. Also I'm not sure what the weight of the pool would be when it's full so best not to risk it... Fingers crossed your baby turns soon.
Girlwiththemouseyhair Thanks for your list, very useful. How about some massage oil/talc for back massage? My AN teacher also suggested Bach rescue remedy for during labout and Arnica granules for after labour.
And CDs/MP3 player if you want music?
Rhian Sounds as though your mw is very supportive and reassuring. Makes a nice change after some of the stories we've had on this thread.
Laura Welcome. Hope you get your hb

Hi Heartmum -- my booking in appointment was brilliant. Lovely midwife who I will now see for all of my appointments and will also be my midwife on the day of my birth (plus one more, still to meet). She knew I had requested her team specifically because I wanted a HB so was all prepared with the right literature, including a list of all the things you need to have at home in prep for HB (including a list of tea making instructions for various midwives - very tongue in cheek so it looks like they have a sense of humour as well). We listened to the babe's heart beat which was nice and strong and discussed all the appointments I am going to have over the next few months.

So all in all, it was fab! I feel totally confident that I will get my hb and she will help me do it, so am very pleased. The place where I went for the appointment was very swish as well - felt almost like a private practice and not NHS at all (like the last hospital I was at before transferring).

Anyway - thanks for asking -- looking forward to reading everyone's birth stories soon!

Welcome Laura -- do stick around and let us know how it all goes.

Anglepoise -- how did The Talk go yesterday?
xx

As far as where to set up a pool, if not on a ground floor then next to one or 2 load bearing walls. The corner of a room with an o/s wall is perfect. I intend to have my pool set up in the living room - still have to get waterproof groundsheets and 39wks pg - which has laminate floor. Dh is worried the floor will be wrecked so he wants it in the kitchen which has slate. Like he is going to argue with a woman in labour when the time comes to set up the pool.

The living room also has lights which dim which I think is a + for this otherwise will have to bring down a bedroom lamp from upstairs as the kitchen only has bright lighting.

I am using a La Bassine birth pool. I went for that one because it is smaller and I am sure I don't want dh in the pool with me - and I am sure he doesn't want to climb in either! It is cosy. I am 5ft 4in and i can lie with my back against one side of the oval and they don't touch the far side. My legs are long for my height too.

If weight is an issue, it holds the smallest volume of water, can fit in a v. small space (about 3.5 ft by 2.5ft).

another thing, a midwife is supposed to come around on monday afternoon to make a birthplan with me. Well, I have already made my birth plan. Seeing that they are already looking for what can go wrong, I can only see their plan having a lot of detail to keep them not me, comfortable.

so watch this space.

cricri Yes, all the midwives I've seen (pretty much a different one at every appointment!) have been positive. We've got one of the highest home birth rates in the country here (Bath, which is Wiltshire PCT for maternity) so I think all the midwives are really on board with it and up-to-date with all the evidence about how safe it is, which so many people here seem to have to present to their midwives/doctors. I feel very lucky!

Hello ladies! Just a quickie as I'm stealing internet to post (ours isn't set up in the new place yet).

Meeting with MW was postponed on Thurs but went ahead fine on Friday - thanks for the good wishes. All seemed fine - she said that they are generally trying to encourage them in the area at the moment, which was nice. She ran through reasons why they might transfer me, which all seemed fairly standard, and dropped off the kit, which I obviously rifled through as soon as she left

Birth pool (birthpoolinabox, £40 off ebay) is set up and ready to go - all we need now is the baby! Not even due until tomorrow but already getting impatient, so send labour vibes my way ...

My parents are out of the country until Wednesday and still don't know our plans, but DH told MIL the other day on the phone and her response was "Good!", which is fab - she said she'd had both home and hospital births and knew which she preferred.

Good luck Anglepoise - sending good labour vibes your way! I hope it all works just like you want it to.