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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Original poster

On a scale of 1-10, how painful is giving birth?

234 replies

rogantano · 16/12/2025 12:01

I want to give birth to a baby naturally but my pain threshold is non-existent… my mum is worried about the day I give birth because she said all I’ll be doing is screaming

OP posts:
Allseeingallknowing · 16/12/2025 13:05

12

luckylavender · 16/12/2025 13:05

Honestly, I was lucky and I’ve had far worse period pains. For context I had preeclampsia and was induced which took ages (days). When it all kicked in finally it was all over in less than 2 hours with no pain relief. I always like to tell expectant mums that story as people are always out to frighten them.

Honeypizza · 16/12/2025 13:07

Far more than a 10 but I guess it is what it is. An epidural helps!

BadgernTheGarden · 16/12/2025 13:09

I think it varies a lot, I was an older first time mum so everything was a bit less flexible, so it was a difficult birth and not much fun, but the outcome makes it all worth while and forgotten in a minute. After the event my midwife said she thought I should have had a c-section, now she tells me!

elliejjtiny · 16/12/2025 13:10

It really varies. My 1st and 3rd were about a 6, about the same as period pains or the cramps you get with the runs Then pushing felt different, like trying to get something very large out of a very small hole, which is mostly annoying and uncomfortable for most of it as you feel really bunged up but then the baby crowns and it stings like hell but that bit is over quickly. The baby is out fairly soon after that and you get all the newborn cuddles if they are OK which is amazing.

About half an hour later, just when you think nothing is ever going near your vagina again, the midwife reminds you that you can't sit there forever with the cord attached to both you and the baby so you let them cut the cord, hand baby to your birth partner and push the placenta out. Which is something soft and flexible so wouldn't normally hurt but if your vagina has been damaged it feels like pushing out something with jagged edges.

My 2nd was back to back and my 5th was induced which were both a lot more painful, more like a 10. Lots of screaming and moaning with those.

My 4th was an elective c-section.

user86397409754 · 16/12/2025 13:12

It was like extreme period pain for me, that came and went every 5min or so. Nothing unmanageable. I’ve had far worse falls off horses!
And weirdly you forget about it almost instantly.
Don’t listen to your mother, every one of your female ancestors except maybe the last two or three must have given birth successfully so the odds are in your favour.

whatthedickens5 · 16/12/2025 13:15

It can hurt a lot for some people and not so much for others. When I got to the hospital I was already 6cm dilated and had no pain. I only went in because my waters broke. My son was born 1h42 minutes later and I did not need any pain relief. My 2nd was also born quickly so did not really have time to register any pain. Both mine where back to back which is apparently more painful but I found it all bearable. Remember drugs are there to be used if needed :-)

Firstsuggestions · 16/12/2025 13:15

I have zero pain threshold, I cry at a papercut. I found it totally bearable and I had a back to back labour first time and a 10lb8 baby second time. The pool and gas and air really helped and I can honestly say I found labour enjoyable. Second time I was laughing with the midwives right up to transition. It's so different for everyone. Remember, you can change your mind and take the drugs if you want to. It never felt like more than I could handle.

ChocolateLemsip · 16/12/2025 13:20

Different for everyone. Another one who was fine with gas and air here, and barely any pain at all the last hour or so. Your mum is BU scaring you like that.

stargirl1701 · 16/12/2025 13:20

For me, it felt a little like period cramps but with more pressure. I’ve certainly had periods that were more painful than any of my labours. I was in a birth pool for DD1 which was just lovely.

Keep an open mind. I didn’t have much in first birth plan - just red lines like no Kiellands (so?) forceps. I think it’s better to be sure what you will not consent to rather than a list of things you think you might like.

PoorPhaedra · 16/12/2025 13:22

When my sons asked me what giving birth is like I told them it felt like being ripped apart by a shark.

NotQuiteUsual · 16/12/2025 13:23

Giving birth is bloody brilliant. Yes it hurts, Yes it's tiring. But you know what else is? Running a marathon. It's a endurance thing mostly, as it can be quite long. The pain ramps up slowly so you get used to it bit by bit. Like when you slowly get in a cold pool so your body can adjust. It's not 0-100. It's a slow, gentle process. You might wanna scream through a few contractions, you might want to be silent. Both are absolutely fine and perfectly valid ways to tolerate a contraction.

Ratherubbish · 16/12/2025 13:24

10, in my experience. I don't want to sugar coat.

Chica1990 · 16/12/2025 13:25

I was induced with my first and had the epidural right away as I have 0 pain threshold but it was hard to push and need ventouse assistant to get him out.

However with my second I didn't get a chance for the epidural, even though the doctor entered the labour room behind me ready to give me it. I was a wild animal that second time, gas and air didn't seem to do much for me and I think most of the discomfort was panic and I wanted someone to just come rescue me. I sometimes wonder if it happening so quick (1.5 hours) was the reason the pain caused me to panic.

someone touched on it earlier but it was so much worse on my back so I went on all fours but even at the end one of the midwives moved me onto my back again.

im still waiting for me medal for the second labour 😂 but I did feel like a superwoman after and my recovery was a lot better, lost less blood as I didn't need intervention, and baby bonded with me much better and in general is a much easier baby. At the time I felt very hard done by but I'm glad it went the way it did now.

Thistooshallpass. · 16/12/2025 13:25

Worse than 10 . The intensity of the pain that you cannot escape . Two children here - no pain relief for either - 3rd degree tear .
It is a massive trauma for the body - but the price you pay to be a mother .

OldPosterNewName2025 · 16/12/2025 13:27

I had 3 using gas and air.

I was lucky that all 3 labours were quite straightforward.

I tried making more noise/screaming a bit during the third as lots of women on TV do that. It didn’t help at all and my energy was better used on pushing.

ShawnaMacallister · 16/12/2025 13:28

SelfRaisingFlour · 16/12/2025 12:19

There is no pain at all between contractions. Obviously the contractions get closer together so it gets more constant near the end, but it's not constant for the entire length of the labour.

I found gas & air helpful, because it distances you from the pain.

There is pain between contractions once you reach fully dilated

Passthecake30 · 16/12/2025 13:29

10 - my pain threshold is non existent. I begged (and got) epidurals for both of mine, it was always on the cards, I’m the sort of person who will pop a pill at the first sign of a headache! However, what I hadn’t known is that you have to be so many cm dilated before you can have one, so had hours of pain in waves with ds first (less with dd). I’m in awe of how people can do it without epidurals tbh.

ChillWith · 16/12/2025 13:29

Are you saying naturally meaning no painkillers? Definitely don't put that in your birth plan as some hospitals take those as gospel. Have an open mind. Things can change and you need to be able to adapt so don't rule it out.

Ileithyia · 16/12/2025 13:31

My broken toe hurt more. Stay upright and mobile, don’t lie on your back, focus on breathing during contractions and ignore coached pushing.

crossstitchingnana · 16/12/2025 13:32

I did active birth yoga, with the affirmations that your body will know what to do, trust it and try and relax. It’s 100% true. First labour was painful but I just relaxed so it was bearable. Second I panicked for a bit and it bloody hurt.

Dollymylove · 16/12/2025 13:33

You will be glad when its over is all i will say 😇

Darkdiamond · 16/12/2025 13:33

Im going to say 10+, for me. I was induced with the drip and the labour went on for a long time and I couldn't manage the pain psychologically as I was so exhausted. I couldn't get into the zone after a certain point and just felt like I was being beaten up for hours. I've friends who said its fine and not that bad. The most important thing is that you try to get yourself into the mindset that childbirth, by whichever means necessary, is just a means to an end. You want baby to get from inside of you to outside of you, alive. I got so wrapped up in defining myself through natural childbirth and felt like an absolute failure when things didn't go that way. I put so much pressure on myself to handle the process itself rather than just getting through the process to get the baby.

Hiptothisjive · 16/12/2025 13:34

it about 157/10.

I knew myself and knew natural wasn’t for me. I don’t understand it but I’m from a place where women tend to go for epidurals and then tend to breast feed. The UK seems to be the opposite.

But don’t stress about it and think about it too much.My advice is ask for the epidural in advance so they are ready - you can always say no at any time.

MrsApplepants · 16/12/2025 13:34

For me it was a 10. Not everyone forgets the pain either. I certainly haven’t. Fucking awful. Take the epidural if you want it. Most blissful relief ever.