Overwhelmed - Husband is against getting induced!

[kakashixxkillua]

Hi all! I'm currently 38w+0d today. We went to see a hospital consultant recently as my baby was plotting as big in the growth scans - 96th percentile. Note, I have no health risk or underlying medical issues, it's just baby is** measuring too large. The hospital consultant strongly urged I opt for either an induction or an elective c section, I went for the induction. It's all booked in for 39w (next Monday). DH couldn't make it to this appointment and so when I filled him in he was furious as he's anti medical interventions, alongside his entire family. My MIL is also very opinionated on my decision

Anyways, was just looking for some positive induction stories from you guys as I've been around a lot of negativity and criticism recently and started to regret my choice. Or is there a way I can naturally induce myself before 39w?

Thanks x

"I am going to presume that the doctor recommending an induction or c-section is more trained than your DH and his mother."
This.
You can only follow medical advice and take no notice of your foolish husband and his silly mother (sorry).

My friend was induced, I thought it might lead to a long labour, surprisingly the baby arrived within an hour, all went well!

OP I’m hoping you are actually reading the responses and listening to the advice given!

When he is pushing a bowling ball out of the end of his penis he gets say otherwise he doesn’t…
My second was an induction- it was grand

Your autocorrect is on fire this evening!

But in reply to the OP, he should fuck right off with his "no medical intervention" crap.

Do you come from a religious background or does your husband? Either way, tell him to get lost.

This this this. Not to mention following the advice of the consultant.

Is he also against vaccinating baby?

I have a young relative born without medical intervention. He has cerebral palsy as a result.

Your body, your medical advice - and the DH who didn’t turn up for the appointment to hear that guidance can do one.

There's only one intervention he gets a right to decide about and that is the use of a condom. And even with that you get a say in what happens with or without.

I've had 2 inductions at 39 weeks and I'm sure the induction was the only reason i ended up birthing vaginally. You can never be sure but i suspect i would've ended up with an obstructed labour if I'd have gone past 39w.

If it's your first baby the most recent evidence from the ARRIVE trial suggests that an induction at 39 weeks is the safest delivery option for the baby.

My MIL is also very opinionated on my decision - well she can jog on! What the hell has it to do with her?

No no no no no! He does not get to overrule what you want and what the medical team advise. This is your time and his job is to support you and your wishes.
Or he can fuck off.

he's anti medical interventions, alongside his entire family

And you still married him?!

This is your body. YOU get to decide what what medical procedures you have. You, and nobody else. Not your husband, and certainly not his bloody family who frankly sound like nutjobs. He has zero say in how you choose to give birth. Zero.

I would also start to think about getting yourself a “support group” of people you can trust to be on your side and stand up for you and your needs, such as other family members and friends etc. 💐

Not going to comment on your relationship with your husband etc. just going to give you what you asked for and that is my personal experience (comparing any labour and/or pregnancies is comparing apples and oranges anyways). I had quite a neglected pregnancy healthcare wise. I had high blood pressure from 8 weeks right up until 6 months pp. I was measuring off the scale. Never sent for further tests, never given any advice. Wasn’t even tested for diabetes. Like your husband I was against any kind of interventions or an induction. Largely because I did a hypno birth course (which was amazing for pain management) but definitely put me off of inductions or the idea of a c-section. I had a few private scans for gender, and a 4K one, I was told at those he was measuring big with a large head. I was never advised by the NHS for an induction early, or a c section and they never mentioned the measurements. For reference I am petite, size 8, my bump was huge and off the measuring scale from the first measurement. I refused induction all the way up to 42 weeks. Couldn’t take anymore being pregnant, exhausted every “natural” induction method. Nothing. I was induced. I did have a bad reaction to the induction, they had to administer a drug to stop it. I was having 6-7 contractions in 10 minutes as opposed to 3-4 like you’re supposed to from the moment they induced me. 32 hour labour unmediated used breathing techniques. Baby too big, got stuck caused hyper contractions to start again. Emergency c section under general. I actually quite enjoyed my labour. I also was never disappointed in the c section, only that I never saw my son born, and it felt like the midwives and my husband had all the natural first contact and skin to skin whilst I was in surgery. Certainly not trying to give you a horror story, as I said I enjoyed my labour. On reflection however, if I was advised professionally as you have been, and what I believe to have been correctly, I had a birth review where they confirmed he was never going to fit, and I was able to consider that with my attitude towards inductions at the time I would’ve 100% opted to be induced earlier being equipped with the facts and the pros, cons and risks: Not only to have been able to see my son born and be the first to hold him, but also to not have his life risked the way it was during the labour with the hyper contractions and him ultimately being too big and being stuck in my birth canal. I’m a year pp and still struggling with PTSD from the experience. True story. True lesson learned. True reflection of my experience and my should’ve, would’ve, could’ve. I hope this helps. My advice would be to request an appointment to discuss this with your husband present, and actually discuss all the risks associated with shoulder dystocia, severe tears etc. and weigh it up from there. It isn’t about natural or unnatural, it’s about what is most safe for YOU and YOUR baby. Get all the facts, then make the best decision for you and the baby

I wish my friend had been induced, she had a history of doing big baby, the 3rd one was late and weighed more than 5kg, extremely traumatic birth ending with a Amniotic fluid embolism she died at 28 and baby followed 2 days later (brain deprived of oxygen), it was 15 years ago and there is not a day I don't think of her. You are a mum and it is your body, do what feels right FOR YOU AND BABY, what your DH, PIL, me ,the postman thinks is absolutely irrelevant, induction, peridural, cesarian whatever listen to your guts. I am wishing you a happy and smooth birth whatever you wish to do.

I wouldn't likely be inducing for that kind of reason either, the research for supporting it isn't there. It's not so easy to estimate size and the idea that the baby at that size is "too big" is idiotic. People have big babies every day. The idea that the doctor can measure your pelvis isn't all that legitimate either.

I'd especially not be going near a c-section for that as it has it's own risks, it is major surgery.

The anti-intervention people can absolutely go to far. But that pushback came from the fact that so much obstetrical care is unevidenced. And interventional all come with their own downsides, so if they are being done without being evidence, sometimes they will be causing more harm than good.

Inductions are a good example, barring a real problem they are never as likely to go as well as allowing labour to occur naturally, because it's an artificial attempt to get the body to start labouring. We just don't know enough, and can't influence enough, about all the little things that make the body ready to go into labour, you are basically forcing it with a major dose of hormones.

Obviously it's up to you, but it's not like your husband doesn't have a big investment in the whole thing and doesn't get to ask if it's the best approach, it would have been good to discuss it with him first.

Opposes medical intervention…. So when baby is two weeks overdue, weighs 10lbs and gets stuck no one is to intervene… yep. Sounds safe for both of you….
How ridiculous. Think MIL needs to butt the f out if you ask me. Be careful with her and do not let her close enough to be adding her two cents to every parenting decision you make.
DH has to learn that he’s married to you, not his mother.

The advise is there for a reason and it’s backed up with science/statistics

You asked for positive induction stories - I had a v positive induced birth. We knew exactly when conception was so I was comfortable that the bump had cooked for long enough. Went to the hospital first thing, had some stingy vag cream put in. Hung out all day with my husband and he was there for when my waters were broken. I had a v rapid labour (runs in the family and happened with no. 1) but I felt safe throughout. Baby was monitored closely and we were never more than 10 m from healthcare professionals who knew what they were doing. We were able to plan for our older child to be looked after and felt in control the whole way through. We had no unplanned interventions.

Natural start to labour is great if that’s what you want and there are no/low risk factors (I did it with kid no. 1) but if the medics are saying that the bump staying in could be risky then it’s a no-brainer. Hope you work things out - you need someone who’s in your corner. Take care and best of luck.

Are they of a certain religion? As he’s against medical interventions, does he never want you to get your child vaccinated or go to A&E should they break a limb? How about if you or he need a hospital in the future because of an accident or similar?

have 3 children. last 2 were inductions. the last induction was awful and if that had been my experience the 1st time I wouldn’t have had more children. Would avoid if possible. also growth scans can be wildly inaccurate.

I technically had 3 inductions but I was in labour with my second and well on the way to giving birth. My first ended with a forceps as I was exhausted, don't fight labour! My third was induced by pessary for 3 days and the obs said it was going a c section if this pessary didn't work which she thought was unlikely due to my cervical position. A couple of hours labour started and she was born about 4 hours later.

I had pre-enclampsia with all 3 and apart from my first were all overdue.