Overwhelmed - Husband is against getting induced!

[kakashixxkillua]

Hi all! I'm currently 38w+0d today. We went to see a hospital consultant recently as my baby was plotting as big in the growth scans - 96th percentile. Note, I have no health risk or underlying medical issues, it's just baby is** measuring too large. The hospital consultant strongly urged I opt for either an induction or an elective c section, I went for the induction. It's all booked in for 39w (next Monday). DH couldn't make it to this appointment and so when I filled him in he was furious as he's anti medical interventions, alongside his entire family. My MIL is also very opinionated on my decision

Anyways, was just looking for some positive induction stories from you guys as I've been around a lot of negativity and criticism recently and started to regret my choice. Or is there a way I can naturally induce myself before 39w?

Thanks x

Not rtft but your husband and his family are idiots. Til he pushes something the size of a watermelon out of his penis he has no right to comment on how you choose to birth your child.

I was insured at 38+5, I am heavily asthmatic and under 5ft 4, dd was 53.5cm long when born. Every time she moved I had an asthma attack and hit the deck Coa she was pushing her feet up under my lungs and reducing even further the amount of space I had to actually breathe.

Induction was done at 7pm and she was born 25 hours and 40 mins later. I had a patient controlled epidural and oxytocin drip. Full labour commenced at 2010 and she was born sleepy at 2040 so they kept us in for 12 hours for obs but we were absolutely fine.

I never want any more kids but I wouldn't hesitate to go for Induction again.

Your body, your decision.

He doesn't have to be induced then 😅

You should tell him you don’t know if you can have him as a birth partner if his priority is no medical intervention rather than you and baby being well, you’re worried his choices will see you or baby injured or dead, and you can’t even find the words for how stressful that feels at 38 weeks pregnant. He also needs to promise to tell his mum nothing about your birth at all or he can’t be there.

This isn’t about your husbands beliefs! It’s about your safety and babies safety! I was overdue! Big baby and well I wish I had been induced!

I went 11 days overdue with a giant baby, 10lbs. Induced but couldn't transfer me to labour ward as full...for days! Finally got waters broken, agonising labour with a back to back giant baby, epidural didn't work. Didn't dilate more than 3 cm in 8 hours labour, because he was huge and his position meant his head wasn't on my cervix and his size meant he couldnt turn. Had an emergency section. In the old days might have died or been severely injured trying to get him out. Wish I'd been induced earlier tbh.

Intervention is a gift at times to women in childbirth, it isn't dodging pain or taking an easy way out. Your husband doesn't get a say I'm afraid, and I hope he supports you properly after whatever birth you have and whatever medical help you need. My husband was in shock at ehat intent through to bring our baby into the world, and couldn't do enough for us after he was born. That's how its meant to be, time to have a firm word with your husband. To add a positive many friends have had inductions and been fine given birth vaginally no problem. Just saying my story to show that sometimes medical intervention can save lives/avoid major injury in childbirth.

Completely echoing others thoughts here, please tell your dh to keep his opinions to himself about YOUR body and YOUR birth. If necessary do not allow him to the birth if you cannot trust him to advocate for what you need and want.

RE positive inductions, I had an induction with dd at 39+2 due to reductions in heart rate (full disclosure she was my second baby). Induced with pessary at 1pm, pains started around 3pm. In active, this really hurts, labour by 8pm. Dd was born at 11.30pm after 3 pushes. I had gas and air, planned to have an epidural but was too far along when I asked for it.

I am so so sorry you have such unsupportive people around you at this time. I hope you are able to take the best decision for you and only you, informed by the medical advice you have.

I had an induction for the same reason. Had epidural (highly recommend!!) and forceps and episiotomy as baby was struggling to come out and heart rate kept dipping. What might have happened if we waited and baby got bigger? Shoulder dystocia? Death, of him or me or both? It doesn’t bear thinking about. I am very, very glad I went with medical advice in what is an inherently dangerous experience.

Thanks to modern medicine maternal and infant mortality is low - but that is with THANKS to modern medicine’s interventions!

Birth is a very physically demanding (let’s be honest - fairly traumatic) experience, even when it goes smoothly. You get to call the shots!

A healthy baby is the best outcome, regardless of delivery. Your happiness/comfort is also critical. As someone who had two inductions in the midst of very little good induction stories let me tell you it was the best decision I made in the moment for myself. A planned induction meant I could focus on what I could control and monitor the amount of pain relief I needed. It also meant I could get excited about meeting my little one rather than worry about whether something would happen! (One was overdue by 14 days, the other was measuring small).

Goodluck x

I was induced with my DS. All went swimmingly apart from the failed epidural. They had told me he was going to be 9lb + and he was 7lb 10.
I declined induction with my DD (had GD but well controlled and her measurements were stable). Definitely an easier labour with her despite no pain relief.
Ultimately it is your choice, if you’ve weighed up the risks and made an informed decision then he needs to accept that.

The OP literally writes that she has no health issues/no underlying medical issues. I certainly did NOT insinuate that the OP is brainwashed, I was saying many of the commenters on the post are!!

Giving an option of induction or c-section for a 'big' baby, is against medical guidelines. The Consultant has strongly advised for these. This is enough to make most women accept as 'doctor knows best', she hasn't really been given the choice to do nothing though, has she? Which is a perfectly valid and safe option, given she has no health issues, and that growth scans are notoriously inaccurate in late pregnancy. She, in my opinion, based on the details she has given, has not been given all of the options to make her informed decision, as she was not given the option of awaiting spontaneous labour.

It is absolutely nothing to do with him - your body- your choice! I was induced for my first, for health reasons and it was all fine!

How dare he be furious- what a prick!!! I would be questioning my relationship if he was willing to risk my health and his babies health because he has some ridiculous ideas!! Tell him to fuck off!

From my local Trust doesn’t look like its against ‘guidelines’

Early induction of labour, a week before your due date, will be considered if your baby is large for dates on ultrasound scan. It is estimated that for every 60 women who have labour induced, one case of shoulder dystocia resulting the baby having a broken bone (arm or collar bone) is prevented

It's your body!!

PLEASE take notice of the Consultant (actual medical professional) and tell your husband (and his family) to do one.

What is going to happen with vaccinations and other procedures your baby might need?

Just another person here to beg you not to have your DH as your birth partner. Take someone who will be a supportive advocate for YOU. Or even no-one, would be better than someone who will advocate against your interests.

My DH was so good in this role - when I was bewildered he asked midwives for more and different pain relief. He relayed medical advice and instructions back to me because I was out of it and could focus on his voice better than other voices. Doesn't sound like you can trust your DH to do this.

My second pregnancy was induced, it was absolutely fine (I mean, still an overwhelming life experience!). Take all and every pain relief offered (I'm ALL FOR the wonders of medicine!)

Anything can happen during birth, eg needing emergency cesarean, again you need a birth partner who is going to 100 per cent be there for you whatever happens. That doesn't sound like your DH.

Your husband should be nothing but supportive. What an idiot!

While I understand preferring not to have medical intervention, not having it when it's needed (which it is or else the medical professionals wouldn't have mentioned it) could be really dangerous.

To me, it sounds like the safest option for your baby is medical intervention, so I'd suggest you take it and I also suggest you somehow learn to own your decision. This is presumably not going to be the last time you'll face criticism from your partner and in laws when it comes to your child, so you'll need to learn to handle it.

Having said that, it doesn't really matter what I think you should do - what do you think you should do? After having spoken to the medical professionals, what do you think the right approach is? Clearly that's induction, so just go with that!

I was induced and it was easier and safer for both me and baby. If I hadn’t have been, and had gone into labor at home or unexpectedly elsewhere, the birth could have gone very, very wrong. I’m so shocked by your husbands ignorance. Medical intervention saves lives.

I’ve been induced, it was absolutely fine - no more painful than natural labour. I’ve also had a birth with shoulder dystocia - that was the most terrifying and painful experience of my life and my husband was probably worse as he had to watch it all play out. Final baby was an C section, mainly pushed for by him because he was so scared. With the shoulder dystocia everything was absolutely fine and a lovely natural labour until it very suddenly wasn’t and then all hell broke loose. Listen to your doctors, they are interested in a healthy mum and a healthy baby.

Tell him to fuck right off - if he was having the baby, he could decide on how it's born. Your body, you decide. Angry for you! He's actually a being a cunt!

Her husband isn't a consultant who is simply just doing their job.

When he grows a baby inside himself he can decide what to do. Your body your choice. You have a Dh problem.

Your body, you decide with the advice of your Consultant.

When men can have babies in the distant future they might think differently.

I was induced because DC4 was measuring big. I’d previously had big babies and quick labours. My consultant thought DC4 had a real risk of shoulder dystonia, especially problematic if I had a very quick labour again and delivered at home.

i was induced at 38 weeks, dc4 was 11lb and I gave birth 3 hours after gel had been put in, the quickest reaction to gel the midwives had seen.

with my 10lb and 11lb babies, the second stage wasn’t easy although I’m certainly not tiny. Both had to be manually rotated during second stage. I’m very glad I was Induced as no 4 was estimated 12 lb plus if I’d gone to term. I have absolutely no regrets, especially as I have quick labours. I trusted my consultant when she spoke about the risks of shoulder dystocia. Dc4 was nearly twice the size of some of the other babies on the post natal ward!

your body, your choice and listen to the experts.