anyone have a vaginal birth and later wish they'd had a c-section?

[izzzie]

hello
i have a big fear of tearing and also of damaging my pelvic floor (already got problems in that department, though kegels are helping a lot.) and am considering elective c-section but am aware it's no picnic and would rather have a natural birth if I can get over these fears. I don't want to live to regret my decision, ie, go for a natural birth and end up a real mess and wishing i'd followed my instinct which is that a c-section might be better for me personally, despite all the downsides to it.
I was just wondering about other people's experiences - if you had a 3rd/4th degree tear, or if you are suffering from incontinence after birth, did you later really wish you'd had a c-section?
any advice/experiences gratefully received...i'm doing a lot of reading and researching..

I wish I'd had a CS

i am really, really glad to hear that , starlight.. honestly, i am

i wish you a happy , healthy pregnancy and a wonderful , positive and enriching birth experience, that helps to heal the trauma from last time.

Hey Izzie

I had my first in July this year and i too was scared of birth. I did hypnobirthing and this did help in getting to a more positive frame of mind in terms of learning how to relax more, and i also did perenial massage. You do this from week 32 onwards for 5 mins a day and it really will help. I had no perenial tear and only a small labia tear, which didn't hurt and 2 hours after birth i was sitting cross legged up in bed and couldn't feel a thing! I also gave birth to an 8lb boy, so he wasn't small by any means!

I used Sweet Almond oil and you put a small amount on your thumb (I also used gloves when doing this for hygene purposes but you don't have to) and you insert it into you and pull down slightly on the area of your perenium until you feel it stretch slightly and then move your thumb in a u shape. At first it will feel quite taut but it will soon relax and you will definitely feel the benefit come labour time!

Good luck and congrats on your baby

If you have a baby in an NHS hospital, the experience will only be as good as the team on duty, IME.

Lovely plans for a VB can either work or be blown out of the water by short-staffed and overstretched MWs and doctors. A birth plan is sadly not worth the paper it's written on a lot of the time, IMVHO.

As others have suggested, take advice from your consultant and the MWs and definitely make sure that you have someone with you to act as an effective advocate if you choose VB.

Congratulations Starlight!!!

Enjoy your pg and I'm glad to hear that you have such a fab mw. She sounds like she will be very supportive and enable you to explore your options. Even if you decide to elect a CS still I think it's important for you to deal with the previous birth. Also exploring the many various options for pain relief available at a HB should help you to learn more about yourself.

I recommend you get a copy of Birthing From Within as part of this process

you didn;t whinge ! have CATted you, starlight with some info that might be useful x

havent read all the posts but want to add my voice to Eleusis.

i had an elective cs on medical grounds (after prepping for vb via hypnobirthing etc) and i honestly have no regrets whatsoever. my birth and recovery were both amazing.

keep an open mind, get lots of advice. and please take all the anti cs views on here with a pinch of salt. some of the threads on here had myself and other posters absolutely petrified with some of the stories before our sections. obviously there are risks with cs and things can go wrong. but my view is that
each birth and each recovery is different - be it vb or cs.

make the choice you feel happy with but prepare to be flexible and have those plans changed on you...as mine were at 34 weeks.

good luck.

you have to sign up for it, and pay £5

i think i have your email addy from before, so will try that x

Hi StarlightMcKenzie,

congratulations on your forthcoming birth.

There is so much support on here for you and it seems like you have a very sensible midwife.

A positive approach to delivery can make such a lot of difference and it seems from your post that you are achieving this.

I wish you a wonderful pregnancy and a safe delivery of a healthy baby.

I am a big girl's blouse. I was hoping that there would be a medical reason that would force me to have a c-section as I thought that I would manage that better. Genuinely terrified of labour .

As it turned out - DD was born in water. No drugs, no tears, no damage of any kind and I was home a few hours later putting a load of washing on and making soup.

Just wanted to say do whatever feels right for you at the time. I have two dc's both born naturally, in water. I teared a small amount but not enough to warrant stitching.
I was up and about within two hours of 2nd DC, left hospital and even popped into tesco's for some shopping on way home!
I have friends who have amazing/bad natural birth experience same with c-sections.

Just please remember that having major abdominal surgery is not the easy way out.
Elusius, i can vouch that the amount of pain that comes from pushing something the size of a lemon through a melon is incredibly painful, however thats where nature designed it to exit, not the stomach. Oh, and thanks, for trying to inform and educate the poster with your pictures. Maybe i will post a picture of my friends infected and ruptured CS scar? Just to give a balanced view.

just to balance off the views, I had 2 cs, em and then elective. Both easy quick recoveries. It is a valid choice.