Why are Mothers-to-be treated like idiots in the Labour Ward???

[Toothache]

This question has been bugging me for a while. I was already in hospital when I my waters broke with DS. I had been in for a few days with high BP and was 39wks when they broke. It was 3am and waddled to the MW station and told them my waters had gone. They said "No they haven't, just go back to bed"!!!! I INSISTED that my waters HAD broke and they made me hand over my sanitory towel so they could check it. NICE! My waters had broken.
A few hours later the backache kicked in, then contractions. I told them I was in labour and they said "No you're not, it could take hours to get into established labour, go eat your breakfast." As I panted my way through another big contraction then waddled back to bed. Half an hour later I tried to phone DH, midwives STILL insisting that I wasn't in labour. I got a huge contraction and nearly fell in the corridor. A Consultant had some firm words with the Midwives and I was given an internal. I was 4-5 cm dilated and whisked off to the labour ward!!

WHY DIDN'T THEY LISTEN TO ME??????????

Another example:
I got a phonecall from a friend yesterday. Her friend was due her 2nd baby 2 wks from now. She went into labour at home and her boyfriend took her to hopsital. They examined her, told her she wasn't in labour, but that she had a UTI and would kept in for the night. She said "Are you sure, I've had a baby before and this feels like labour". They insisted she wasn't in labour and sent her boyfriend away to fetch her some things. They ran her bath to help with the pain of her "UTI" and 30mins later her baby's head was delivered as she was wrenched from thebath in agony! Healthy 8lb girl. Boyfriend missed everything. .

WHY WHY WHY WHY WHY don't they listen mothers??????

grumble for the day.... anybody else any experience of this?

Ooh, a friend of a friend went into labour last Friday, turned up at the s London hospital she was booked at and it was full! Never even considered that possibility. Reckon it happens often? This probably wrong thread for this.

My first experience of labour in hospital was just like yours SA and I was sent home - only to turn around and go straight back and hour later when the pain was totally intolerable and I was so worried they would send me home again. Later found out that the first midwife I saw was going off duty shortly after I arrived! (Glad about that in the end). When I returned the midwife who delivered ds1 in the end took one look at me and said "Well, you look like you're in labour to me." You can't imagine the relief I felt even though I had hours to go. I was 4 cms dilated when she examined me and the entinox was v helpful in relaxing me a bit until the contractions got much stronger again. I eventually had an epidural which worked well and the delivery itself was a pleasure due to the pain relief and the sympathy and encouragment of a good midwife. But I'll never forget the first one telling me to "Go home, have a glass of wine, have some sex (!?!?!?!?!?!? - I was in agony), do some 'floor cleaning' and take two paracetamol" - I may as well have taken smarties for the good it did me!
My second experience was much worse as the midwife who delivered dd was awful - too long to go into, which is why ds2 was born at home with a fantastic midwife who is a personal friend and looked after me from start to finish of my pregnancy and also post-natally. I realise how privilidged I was for that to happen and I really felt cared for and being so relaxed and in control, had no real need for pain relief! Would recommend home birth to anyone who can!
I would never want to give birth in a hospital again! Mears - you sound like a person I would trust and I think for women in labour or pre-labour pain, trust is fundamental so that when the baby is delivered, regardless of any complications, the mother feels that she was in safe and caring hands. My first hospital experience and particularly my second labour left me in a strange place emotionally for a long time and made it difficult to decide if I could go through it again to have another child that we desperately wanted. (obviously we went ahead and are so glad we did!) Does any of that make sense?

I would have had more children if it hadn't been for the trauma of my pregnancies (awful sickness and terrible prenatal care) and first labor (2nd one was better experience, but I did almost die).

Mears - can I ask you a question?

I was admitted to hospital for induction for first birth. I went in on the Thursday afternoon to be induced on the Friday morning but during evening (Thurs)I started with mild labour pains that went on until the following morning. I reported this but the person prepping me said I'd 'soon be sorted out' and was induced.

I was term plus 5 days (the gynae had requested me to go in as the baby was Clomid(?)).

There is more to it (as you may suspect with dd being SN) but it has always prayed on my mind whether this should have been the procedure.

I haven't asked a question.

It's 'Is this standard procedure?'

totally agree with sofia, we had similar experiences on the nhs i think. now i have had a second child without ever having had what the the witch of a midwife the first time would have called "proper" contractions. i can assure you that the pain of my "false" contractions in pre-labour was well up there with the "real thing"!

Dottee - I would imagine that, although you were experiencing contractions they perhaps were not enough to have got you into labour, hence why they continued with your induction. How long women are left after their date varies greatly from consultant to consultant. Induction itself should not cause a problem. A difficult labour might cause problems, induced or not. Unfortunately some babies have problems that are not associated with birth at all.
If someone comes to out labour ward who is for induction of labour and is having contractions, we will wait and see what happens once the waters have been broken. If contractions are not good within 1-2 hours, we would start the drip as planned. Does that answer the question?

Hmmm! Sort of Mears. Thanks very much for a professional point of view.

I was induced around 10.30am and an ARM was performed about 1pm. I'd had a go at TENS but the contractions were too strong. I'd planned to have a bath to ease pain but couldn't make it along the corridor.

I did have a very fast aggressive labour. Dd was born at 15.51pm. Her Apgar was 9 at 1 min and 10 at 5 mins (or whatever the measure is). But the midwife did comment when the placenta was delivered that she had never seen such a ragged placenta.

Dd has CP and epilepsy with complex learning difficulties. She was diagnosed with CP at 7 months. No-one had picked it up before then (although we had mentioned to the HV that she was lob-sided but the HV said one side was developing slower than the over).

I haven't gone into litigation but it's prayed on my mind whether the labour was too artificially rushed, especially with the placenta being in such a bad condition.

I'm grateful for the information you've just given me.

Although your labour was fast Dottee, your dd was born in very good condition. With Apgars of 9 and 10 it means that she was not hypoxic (lacking oxygen). It used to be thought that distressed babies in labour associated with hypoxia was the reason CP developed. However, research has shown that some babies have brain 'injuries' in the antenatal period and would have CP whatever type of delivery they had. Placenta are amazing things and they vary so much. Some of them look pretty unhealthy and gritty (especially after 41 weeks or in mums who smoke), and others look very red and healthy. It really isn't possible to tell how the placenta was functioning by looking at it after delivery. Often midwives do make some comment. I remember when I had DS2 the midwife said I was lucky to have got an 8lb baby out of it because it looked so puny.
I am sorry that your dd has these health problems but I am not sure that it is linked to the labour. You could get an appointment with the consultant to go over your labour to make things clearer for you.

Dottee, My DS has CP too, and he was a C/Section deliverly, his Apgars scores were 7,8,10. He looked lop-sided too. He was dignosed at 2 1/2 years, after 2 years of me saying there was a problem. Anyway, a neurologist at Great Ormond Street has since told us that his brain injuries happened before birth, possibly around 28 weeks, when he stopped growing for a few weeks.

My DD1 also has CP, and she was born after a 2 hour labour at 31 weeks, very fast and very painful. Her brain injuries happened after birth, while in SCBU.

To be honest, your labour proberly didn't cause her CP. Have you seen the MRI scan? What did the damage look like?? DS's damage looks very contained while DD1's looks very ragged. A consulant could tell you when it happened, and I know with DS, they said that he would have had CP whatever had happened.

Good luck

Oh, DS wasn't an emergancy deliverly, he wasn't distressed, I had a CS because he was breech and I had gone into labour, so they took me straight in for a CS

Sorry another slightly off topic question for Mears. My DS was born at 39 weeks and my notes said that the placenta was very gritty. (I don't smoke). He had shoulder dystocia and respiratary distress, and his apgars were 5,5,8. he was intubated in SCBU for several days.

I too have been worried about CP as he seems stronger on one side than the other, but been too frightened to ask GP/Paed who say he is doing fine.
I assumed the respiratory distress was due to the SD - could my placenta have been to blame, and why was it gritty?

nwmummy - Placentas are often gritty. It is an amazing organ that provides nutrients for the developing baby and acts as a filter. No-one really knows the significance of calcification (grittieness). After a delivery the placenta is checked to make sure it looks complete. Any remarkable features are noted, and is a placenta looked severely abnormal it would be sent to pathology department for examination. I have seen extremely gritty placentas where the baby is absoluely fine.

Shoulder dystocia can lead to a baby being hypoxic at birth which can have a knock on effect on respiration. SD can also cause damage to the nerves supplying the baby's arm resulting in an Erbs palsy which affects the arm only. It can take months of physiotherpay to resote/improve movement.
I thin you you should go to your doctor and express your concerns. Ask for a referral to the paediatrician to discuss your baby's progress. As his mum you know more about him than nayone else. It is always better to know what you are dealing with than get yourself all worried about something that may not be the case. HTH

thanks mears.

He is still being seen by the paed and I have mentioned my concerns about his right side being stronger and he is being reviewed in another month. Have not mentioned CP as don't know if it is me being stupid worrying about something not at all likely. The paed's letter to the GP said probable mild HIE. I've googled this and it is pretty scary (well to me anyway). They're all really vague if I ask if there are going to be any future complications, although we're off for an EEG with him. I don't really know what I should be worried about, or whether it is all just precautionary and they're not worried about anything in particular just being cautious.

Also if I had another one, would I have to have a CS because of the SD last time?

Please ask the paeds the question about CP because it is obviously worrying you. You would not 'have' to have a C/S for your next delivery, but to be honest, it sounds as though it would be advisable. What kind of labour did oyu have. Were you induced? Did you have an epidural? Did you deliver propped up on a bed?

had PROM. I had weak contractions after 22 hours (but had to stay in until then so very tired anyway when I went onto labour room at 2 cm). Poor contractions, and after 3 hours stuck at 5 cm they gave me oxytocin and so I agreed to an epidural, as by this time I was tired and knew things would speed up. So yes, on bed, with antibotics etc

He was 9lb but I'm not small!

Mears, sorry to ask you yet another question (you must feel like you are never off duty) but my DD was born after a very quick labour with 'membranes intact' (I think that is what the MW or the notes said). I think the MW said that she was still partially in the sac and there was some confusion as to whether my waters had broken or not (there was a big puddle on the floor but DH told the MW that it was sweat!!). So was does 'membranes intact' mean?
Thanks

dottee I am pretty sure my dd has CP resulting from her birth. She had an apgar score oif 9.5, although we cant be sure as none of us saw her and when dh did she was 'blue'

nwmummy - sometimes the position of being in bed propped up can lead to shoulder dystocia because the sacrun cannot move back to make room. That can be overcome by lying on your side with an epidural when pushing, but not all women can manage to push like that. Doctors and midwives should be taught a drill to manage shoulder dystocia to minimise any damage to mum or baby.

oneofeach - membranes intact means that the waters have not broken. Ideally the waters break as the baby delivers. Sometimes the baby is born in the sac which is meant to be really lucky. It isn't a problem as the fluid in the sac is what the baby has been in all pregnancy. Sailors who had the 'caul' they were born in were thought never to be able to drown at sea. It is mentioned in Dickens' book David Copperfield.

thanks mears (also re-reading a previous post I should have said intubated, for a short time, and in SCBU for several days).

No-one seemed to indicate the possibility of SD till the last minute (I was pushing for 1 hour 40) , the head took ages to come out,and so then they got more midwifes in to hoist me into McRoberts position, but I'm pretty sure that no-one asked me to get onto my side, and I do have a copy of the notes (that I have poured over).

Thanks for your comments. I feel I can query CP with the paed, but I didn't want to ask him loads of things that weren't possible/infeasible, and him overlook something relevant that I had to ask.

I have also had a really bad experience, which has put me off trying for a second child.
My waters broke whilst at home, and I went to hospital, where I was put on a monitor and a very nice trainee midwife examined me. She said that my waters had broken, but as I was not experiencing strong contractions, to go home and return the next day unless contractions started on their own. (I was three weeks before my due date)

Anyway, I went home, and sure enough, as soon as I got home, I was in very bad pain, feeling a strong urge to push. - I was having contractions every two minutes. They started very quickly - there was no build up or gradual increase in intensity - they were all bloody painful.

My husband phoned up the labour ward, and they told him "She's only just gone home - bring her in if you must"

I went back - and I went straight to the delivery suite - probably cos my waters had broken. However, I was in there for an hour and a half without being examined - I was hooked up to a monitor - but the midwife was not in the room - I honestly has no idea what stage of labour I was in. I thought if this is just the start I am going to die!

At last the midwife returned and looked at the monitor and got a little concerned.
I was still in my normal day clothes - I had not been given a gown - probably because until they looked at the monitor and saw the strength of the contractions, they thought I was a typical first time mum making a lot of fuss. I honestly pulled down my knickers and screamed and my dd's head was out!

I feel I should have been examined when I returned back, or at least a midwife should have been with us.

Due to the quickness of the birth, I had no option for any pain relief at all- not even gas and air - I try to look on the bright side and think that so many women would wish to have a quick, drug free delivery such as mine, but I wish that I had known that I was in the pushing stage of the deivery before I pulled my knickers down.

It was just so frightening because I thought i was only at the start, and was probably only a cm or two dilated, and that the intense pain I was experiencing was probably because I had a low pain threshold. Little did I know that I was in the 2nd stage!

Also, my dd weighed 5lb 2oz, and was exactly 3 weeks early. She was perfectly healthy. There was no mention of extra monitoring due to her low birth weight, does anyone know what the criteria is for extra monitoring? I know my dd didn't need it, but I would be interested to know.

This is a long and interesting thread!! Harking back a bit I know, but I do have to agree with HMB. Not really talking about myself as such but some of my colleagues in the nursing profession really don't deserve to be put down in any way. Fine talk about that medic etc, but in a job that is quite demotivating at times anyway its not nice to think that everyone thinks you are awful! Out of the doctors I work with, some are condescending, arrogant t*ssers, not only to the patients but to staff as well. It seems unfortunate but true that a good majority of these are actually the most knowledgable, leaders in their field, who know what needs to be done and want it done now. The others, well, they are the ones who know nothing. They are quite easy to spot, they use this awful persona to try and hide it.

As for complaints, please please do write in with them. In my quite limited experience of complaints they were often from grieving relatives, wishing to find someone to blame, where none would be found. There are also a few who complain, apparently for the sake of complaining. It is very rare that valid points in this, are almost always quashed straight away and are a sad result of compensation culture. By complaining with all your valid points and experiences, issues will reoccur to make the managers think and change things. More people should complain/feed back or sing praises!!

I'm especting my first baby at the end of a year and I have to confess my feelings about it. I am terrified. More than anything else I am terrified that I am going to appear a wimp. IME people who are wimpish/whiney etc do not always get the best deal from health professionals. This IS WRONG! Please don't think I am trying to say anything else and with all patients I make it my policy to give all pain killers I am able to to try and ensure my patient is pain free. My own experiences as a patient teach me this is not true of everyone. The thought that things will be taken out of my control, that I know I am going to experience pain really is very very frightening. I don't believe I have a particularly high pain threshold, and it's true that some of the stories on here aren't helping to calm me. But at the same time I hope I can learn from them and try to be an assertive but not hysterical(!) woman in labour!

wow megi your story is so identical to mine - waters went at home, went in got sent home was in agony went back in told I was only 1-2 cms. I did get gas and air. Was told I could go the ward for the night but then was told I had to stay in the delivery suite as I was distressed and would wake everyone else up. I was so upset that I was feeling so much pain and it was only the start of it all. They were coming so fast I never had a break inbetween them. I kept apologising for making so much noise and having such a low pain threshold!

It was only when I was screaming so loud that I needed to push that another midwife examined me and said I was 9cms dilated. I was still in my outdoor clothes as well. DD arrives shortly after that and my original midwife actually apologised saying that no wonder I was screaming if I was dilating that fast.

It's so hard when you are feeling so much pain (I didn't even think they were "proper contractions" and everyone around you is telling you to be quiet and breathe through them and conserve your energy.

It hasn't put me off having a second because now I know what a contraction feels like and know to listen to my body.