Homebirth, am I crazy?

[rubberducky87]

Just that really. I'm a first time mum and I really want a homebirth but scared because I've never done it before. Only a few more days until I'm due! My midwife is very supportive but I'm still nervous. Any stories to share??

LaV- not sure I get your point there? Are you saying they make you stay or that they tell you to go home and give birth there?

Well actually there are valid reasons why continuous monitoring is not standard protocol.

But I don't see how you can maintain your stance without believing it ought to be.

I think LaV was referring to the number of people who get sent home and told they are only in early labour when it turns out birth is imminent.

Is it reckless to stay at home for as long as possible until labour establishes? That is what you are advised to do.

They tried to send me home at 6am and I was pushing by 7am!!
Same thing happened to my friend - tried to send her home saying she was 2-3cm and she gave birth around 45 mins later.

So they don't send people home ages from delivery. They make a judgement based on a few factors.

The MW who attended my home birth was far more knowledgable tbh. She told me at 4pm I was only 2-3cm but she knew I was going to progress quickly and even though she left, to give me space to labour in peace, she just popped to the cafe down the road as she knew birth was imminent and called her second mw at that point.
By 5pm I was calling her back as I was going through transition.

"or be in hospital on continuous monitoring to ensure your baby was happy".

They don't continuously monitor low risk women in hospital because there is no evidence it improves outcomes, and there is clear evidence that it significantly increases the c/s rate, which puts mothers at risk.

Low risk mothers are intermittently monitored in all birth settings.

Presumably she knew you would progress quickly because you had progressed quickly the first time? She had that information to go on where the hospital at your first birth didn't. And presumably in both of those cases, though they "tried" to send you home, they didn't and in both cases the babies were born in hospital.

It's a judgement call isn't it. There's no point in being in hospital in the earliest stages of labour so they send people home to relax and sleep and progress to the point where hospital becomes necessary.

Have to ponder at Holly's reference to 'foetal distress', written as though that's not a 'thing' and that it is in fact something those nasty doctors in hospitals invent so they can whip your baby out by Caesarian instead. Babies die of foetal distress Holly. They perform c sections where necessary to save babies lives. If your baby was in distress and you weren't moved to hospital and the baby was ok then you were very lucky. I would hope that they took you there afterwards to check the baby over.

They did in effect send me home. It was my refusal to get into the car that meant I stayed at the hospital, not their judgement. It was my own trust in my own body which many women don't have the confidence in trusting their own judgement.
It was the same with my friend.
I sat downstairs in agony leaning over a chair at the front door because they wouldn't allow me to stay in the labour ward.

" And presumably in both of those cases, though they "tried" to send you home, they didn't and in both cases the babies were born in hospital."

Two of my friends were sent home. And in both cases only made it back to the hospital in time for the birth because they were blue lighted back.

One of those was nearly an unplanned homebirth. The ambulance won't move you unless they think that they can make it to the hospital on blue light. They will deliver at home rather than risk delivering in a moving vehicle or by the road side.

"It's a judgement call isn't it. There's no point in being in hospital in the earliest stages of labour so they send people home to relax and sleep and progress to the point where hospital becomes necessary."

I am sorry, but this is the point at which your argument has lost any internal logic and consistency within itself.

You have, again and again, used your own complication as evidence that home birth is reckless and a gamble. I can understand that given what you've been through.

In your own case, had your baby not been a wriggler or had the complication happened 2 hours later, you would have been at home. Waters broken, baby fine = sent home to await onset of contractions or come back after x hours for induction.

I can't believe that, thinking as you do that sudden and catastrophic complications should be our only factor in decision making, you don't believe that all women should be in hospital throughout.

So you feel that the issue of being sent home means that home birth is a better choice? I fear that it is your argument that has lost its logic.

There was no talk of sending me home by the way. My waters had broken and at no point did they mention that I could go.

Are you saying home birthers are selfish but those who leave hospital during labour are not?

Flowers you are confused and without logic

No, that wasn't what I said.

You would have been sent home in both areas I have lived in. Would you have been kept in for 24 to wait for contractions in your area?

But you know what, I don't think your argument is making any sense whatsoever. I'm out.

I wonder how you weight up your advice to the OP with the NICE guidelines on home birth for first time mums? This states that health professionals should-

Explain that if they plan their birth at home, there is a small increase in the risk of an adverse outcome for the baby.

There study found that an additional 5 in every 1000 births encountered serious complications at home. 40% of first time mums transferred to hospital. I assume you consider this a reasonable risk?

Bees- there is a big difference between experiencing early labour and delivering a baby!!

As I have said, I'm not arguing this with you any more. Your arguments are bouncing around from point to point, never answering or acknowledging things you don't want to and your position on sending labouring women home vs homebirth is illogical. It's like arguing with jelly.

I'm out.

Penguin- we will clearly never agree. I wish you good luck with any future pregnancies and hope that you don't need to rely on it.

You don't need to worry about me. I am done having babies

As stated by myself and others previously, I accept that my argument doesn't sit comfortably on the ears of those who have made your choices.

Me too Penguin!

I must just add, there's nothing illogical about my argument. Going home in early labour is entirely different to planning to deliver a baby at home. I am astounded by the inability to recognise that- we've all experienced the difference haven't we?!

I don't know what the general policy is in my area on going home after waters break and before contractions start. I've had two babies who both started labour in the same way and with both I was kept in. I don't know whether that's standard practice here.

Babies do die of foetal distress. I wasn't taking it lightly when I said that that was one reason why I want to avoid hospital births - my body labours well if I am left more or less alone in a dark room with an unobtrusive midwife, but my contractions stopped completely every time I was disturbed (by light, sound, a new person entering the room...) At home, my midwives were able to keep disturbance to an absolute minimum. In hospital, my baby would have been subjected to hours of extra labouring, and I would almost certainly have been given drugs to speed things up, putting further strain on the baby. I am absolutely certain that had I laboured in hospital, I would have required a drip. I think the chances of a Caesarian would have been well over 50%. Basically, a hospital environment would put my baby in danger, requiring further interventions for a safe birth.

And flowers, I realise that your views are coloured by your experiences. But I would appreciate it you could understand that having had two people I care about in ICU with hospital acquired infections, only one of whom came out, I see avoiding unnecessary surgery as a very high priority.

I'm out too, flowers you are boring and really not making any sense. You weren't in labour when you went in so surely by your own reasoning you shouldn't have stayed in. I had a sub 2 hr labour, I probably would have delivered on the motorway which is extremely dangerous, instead I had a lovely homebirth with 3 highly experienced (although surly) midwives and all there equipment on standby.
You seem not to understand we are all different and all women should be supported to make the choices that are right for them.

I think if I'm being completely honest you need to address your own birth trauma because dishing on pseudomedical misguided advise to first time mums. Like I said previously I'm going on the advise of the professionals around me rather than an unqualified clearly traumatised mum to give clear impartial appropriate advise on birth safety.

Holly, doctors also do all they can to avoid c sections. It isn't the default choice by any means.
Bees- I'm glad you were fortunate enough to have had a good experience. If you were so far from a hospital then it's fortunate that it was a good experience.
I am not the minority voice here you know. I may be on this thread but that isn't a reflection of RL. Most women choose hospital and most have positive experiences, with or without intervention.
Your comments on the quote I posted below are notable by their absence!