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Childbirth

Share experiences and get support around labour, birth and recovery.

Homebirth, am I crazy?

316 replies

rubberducky87 · 26/02/2015 21:44

Just that really. I'm a first time mum and I really want a homebirth but scared because I've never done it before. Only a few more days until I'm due! My midwife is very supportive but I'm still nervous. Any stories to share??

OP posts:
Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 22:30

Penguins- google the Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynaecologists. The statistic of 1 in 200 is theirs. I know that doesn't sit well for your argument in which home birth is safe as prolapse hardly ever happens.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 19/03/2015 22:32

Lilly - that is great. As I've said, I support choice. If you feel safer in hospital, that's all the reason you need.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 19/03/2015 22:34

Fine Flowergirl. I'm happy with 1/200 overall if that is what you want to use. 1/200 is not like your scenario. No risk factors. No high head. Prolapse with an engaged baby....

You want to jump up and down and say how hospital is the only safe option. I get that. You've just been through a trauma. It's understandable. But the stats are that it's not the case.

All I am suggesting is respecting that there are many safe options and home birth, or freestanding MLU, is one of them.

sanfairyanne · 19/03/2015 22:34

lets face it, travelling in advanced labour is always going to be horrible, but at least they have midwives and paramedics with them and its spelt out that it might happen. its more shit imo to be sent home in labour and spend pretty much the entire labour in the car going back and forth, or on to a new hospital, as seems to happen to a lot of people i know now, or give birth with no midwife in hospital or just with one trainee
all things that have happened to my friends
the ones who transferred in mostly had c sections (subsequent labours so already knew they would be ok with gas and air) they were gutted but not so much about the transfer.

Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 22:38

Lilly- thanks. Hospital births really don't have to be the clinical experience that some think they are.

And Sanfairy- no I have two children and very few friends with none. Sorry to scupper your theory.
I'm sorry about your friend too. I do agree about the machines. It's not enough to just connect you up to them and call it done. As I said a long way down on this thread, I remember being cheesed off about the hour or so I spent wired up with midwives checking and moaning cause my baby couldn't stay still (she still can't). Thank goodness they were so attentive

Roseybee10 · 19/03/2015 22:38

My research showed 1/300 births with a cord presentation but only 1/900 with a prolapse. That's a 0.1% chance of prolapse.

They tried to send me home from hospital at 6am with dd1. I was contracting every 2 minutes with contractions lasting 1.5 mins and double contractions because they claimed I was only 3.5 cm. I was adamant I could not get back in the car and thank god I didn't.
I was fully dilated half an hour later and baby was born 3 hours later.

sanfairyanne · 19/03/2015 22:39

mind you, i am pretty pro choice on the issue. its more that i am horrified by the underfunding and understaffing of hospitals right now
it is a scary time to have a baby

Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 22:46

Penguin- I appreciate your point and I agree that my opinion is based on my experience. It's easy to be pro home birth if all you've known is a steady, normal birth. Much less so when you've experienced a difficult birth and have first hand knowledge that things do go wrong.

Re the odds- I have absolutely no idea how often the docs/midwives had dealt with the situation but I can tell you that they left me in no doubt that they knew what they were doing.

I didn't feel like a one off!!! Wink
And yes of course I know that the NHS is stretched and services are tight. Do you think that attending home births then potentially dealing with emergency, unplanned transfers helps or hinders that? (Controversial I know but worth a debate!).

sanfairyanne · 19/03/2015 22:48

they are cheaper, flowrrgirlmum, which is why the nhs is going to be encouraging more of them

Lillygolightly · 19/03/2015 22:49

Roseybee With DD1 I went into hospital on Saturday afternoon as my contractions were just 5 mins apart. I was checked and sent home, told to come back later when the pain was worse. In that case they were right I didn't end up back in hospital until late Tuesday eve with DD1 being born Wednesday morn.
With DD2 went to hospital around 1am as waters had started trickling....contractions started at hospital and I was monitored for around an hour. Again I was sent home and told I would prob be ages yet and to try sleep and relax. Got home and 20 mins later I was making my was back to hospital in agony. Just about made in time for them to fill the birthing pool and for DD2 to be born within half an hour.

Things can change in an instant in labour...I suppose you just never really know what can happen.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 19/03/2015 22:49

You know what, that is out of order. The implication that women having home births is hindering staffing is ignorant and insulting.

My last homebirth my mw was a community mw on call. She wouldn't have been at hospital.

And you know what. If having a home birth gets me the medical attention I deserve when otherwise I would be left alone, in tears, for hours (as happened first time) then yes, I'll do the best for me and my baby. What's safest for me and my baby.

Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 22:52

Calm down Penguin! I said it was controversial and for debate.

I agree actually that it's cheaper and the cynic in me is angered by the government push for more home births in this current climate.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 19/03/2015 22:52

Also, it is deeply patronising to imply all I know is 'normal' birth. As I mentioned, a friend's baby died because they were ignored in hospital. I'm not pro the option of home birth because of some rose tinted view of birth. Another friend has a child with erbs palsy as a result of a panicked junior in hospital. That isn't a rose tinted view of birth (she tells people to home birth or have a planned section. The first gets you an expert, the latter avoids shoulder dystocia, though carries it's own risks).

Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 22:54

You're not comparing like for like though are you? There are plenty of experienced midwives and doctors in hospitals and all community midwives have a first day on the job.

LaVolcan · 19/03/2015 22:56

It's often the home birth service that gets suspended when there are staffing crises with the midwives being asked to cover the hospital services.

Meanwhile the powers that be in hospitals can hide behind the fact they they are providing a maternity service; the fact that the staff are stretched to breaking point seems to escape them.

In my opinion providing one midwife between 3-4 labouring women is not providing a decent maternity service, and this is what we should be up in arms about.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 19/03/2015 22:58

Agreed LaVolcan.

In my first labour I discovered that they were nervous of giving women epidurals because they didn't have the staff to stay with them afterwards. How is that care?

Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 22:59

You're right there. My midwives were brilliant but on the ward after there were 5 women, all recovering from c sections to one midwife per shift. Baring in mind none of us could even get out of bed to lift our babies for feeds those women literally never stopped.

PenguinsandtheTantrumofDoom · 19/03/2015 23:01

I don't know about other areas, but mine doesn't allow newly qualified mws to do home births. You need to be experienced. Junior staff work at the MLU under supervision. Or as second mw on deliveries.

Home birth does mean an experienced mw here.

Of course there are experienced doctors on a ward. That wasn't my point. My point was you didn't know who you'd get in advance. And that they were often left far too much to their own devices in reliance on the big red alarm (that's my friend's opinion btw, not mine).

Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 23:01

It's not an argument for home birth though is it- it's an argument for better NHS funding.

Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 23:04

Experienced midwife Penguin yes but there's always going to be someone on their first day on home births. Their first day going it alone without the back up of doctors, colleagues, an emergency call button etc etc.
You're right, you don't know who you'll get. That's true of all options excluding free birth and I don't think any of us want to go there!!

OrangeMochaFrappucino · 19/03/2015 23:05

I planned a home birth for my second baby after a straightforward first birth in a freestanding MLU. My home was as far from the hospital as the MLU was. However, my waters broke with no contractions and I was called into hospital within ten minutes due to the risk of cord prolapse. So my planning a home birth made no difference - had I planned a hospital birth I would have done exactly the same thing ie call up when my waters broke and gone in to be checked. There was no waiting around for labour to start because I'd planned a home birth, I had to go in. My experience suggests they are very cautious when it comes to home births.

I didn't have a prolapse thankfully and ended up being induced. I'd have been happier at home but I went with medical advice - both initially, when a home birth was recommended to me by the midwife and then subsequently when I was advised to stay in hospital. Home birthers aren't selfishly putting their comfort first, they are making sensible and informed decisions and weighing up risks.

Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 23:07

Re your comment about epidurals Penguin "how is that care" how do you balance that with the fact that you can't have an epidural with a home birth?

Flowergirlmum · 19/03/2015 23:08

Jelly, if it had been a prolapse your decision could have been very significant. I'm glad it was all ok though.

LaVolcan · 19/03/2015 23:11

How is it care if you can't have an epidural with a home birth, but get denied one in hospital?

it's fair to say that women who choose home births almost certainly don't want an epidural, so they are not being denied anything, whereas a number of women choose hospital on the basis that the epidural will be available and will rightly feel annoyed if it's not.

rednsparkley · 19/03/2015 23:11

I haven't rtft but I had one hospital birth (my first) and then three home deliveries - I was very low risk and have easy fast births (my husband nearly delivered our second as it was a lot quicker than we expected). At the time you were not allowed to have your first at home but you are now.

Here you have 2 midwives for a home delivery and I am only 5 mins from the hospital should I have needed it. I loved being at home and found it much much more peaceful, relaxed and manageable. I had an absolutely awful time in hospital and was very VERY keen not to repeat it if at all possible. Luckily for em it all worked out very well.

I hope you get the birth you want, whatever you decide in the end x