'Recovery time' after 1st birth - how long?

[Smittals]

Hello - just wondering how long it took you to feel relatively in control physically and back on your feet again after giving birth for the first time please? I'm due a couple of weeks before Christmas and wondering if I'll be able to cope with all the family visiting, feeling human enough to deal with Christmas dinner etc etc. Both Mum and MIL have already involved us in Christmas events, so I'm wondering if feeling worried (and, lets face it, harassed!) is just me being feeble - after all, they've been through it twice each!

Agree it depends on the labour and how arduous that is. My first was very long and I felt as though I had been run over by a bus. I could hardly walk down the street for the first three weeks without feeling faint and I hated people coming round while I was struggling with breast feeding (it takes a bit of practice until you feel confident about getting your boobs out in front of male relatives in particular).

With DD, the labour was quicker and easier and I felt normal within about a week. However, I still hated the relatives converging on me, due to the tiredness and the breast feeding issue.

If I were you, I'd been non-committal about any Christmas arrangements so soon after giving birth.

Im a fit and healthy 25 year old, and I gave birth to my first last Saturday. The labour went well (only 6 hours), and I didnt tear. I stayed 5 days in lovely midwife clinic while they gave me massages everyday, breast massage, delicious meals and properly looked after me.
Well, its just over a week on now and while I could walk fine 45 minutes after the birth, I would say I am nowhere near normal at the moment. Recovery is very slow, in my case.
Its difficult for your body to heal when you cant sleep properly. I live in Japan, and my extended family bring lunch and dinner for me every day, but still Im guessing its going to be another week or so before I can go for a short walk, and longer before Ill be able to do some proper housework, cook a meal. I thought Id be superwoman (and I did feel like it immediately after the birth), but its one thing to be up and about and its quite another to have made a full recovery.
So, you may get away with being fine for the Christmas dinner, but I believe it will come back to haunt you and your body weeks down the line.

By the way, the waist cincher comes from Japan, and although I was sceptical at first, it really really works. Here they call it a Hara-Obi, or a Waist Nipper, and it basically supports your womb. I thought only excercise would get your belly back to normal, but sure enough after a day or two of the waist nipper, my womb is back to its original size and my belly is flat. It also supports your back and forces you to keep a good posture so you don`t hunch.

To me the holidays is always a time to be with family. You might resent not keeping to tradition because of the baby (even though you're starting your own family).

My advice. Either make it potluck or order chinese takeout. It's not important what you eat or what the house looks like. What is important is that you are with your family. this year you will have a lot to celebrate. Besides everyone will understand if you need to escape to get some rest for a while.

me - about 2 months

I started reading this thread with great interest and now I'm in a huge panic. My DH is insisting that MIL comes over from the US for Christmas and is putting alot of emotional pressure on me about it. I'm due on the 9th and her flights are now booked for the 22nd for a week. The only compromise is that she will stay in a hotel and not with us but is expecting to spend every waking hour at ours. She's nice enough but VERY loud and chatty and I desperately wish sh wasn't coming but DH has managed to make me feel guilty for thinking such things.

Baretoes, spend lots of time upstairs in your bedroom with the baby 'resting'.

Your going to be a new mum (even if you have kids, you're gonna be a new mum to this little one)

New babies sleep lots, so take the time to relax & just be on your own with your new baby. I did this with my dd when the inlaws were over from the states when dd was 6 wks old. I'd just say that she & I were tired & needed a rest. I'd then bugger off to bed with her 2 hrs & come back down completelt rested

They didn't mind in the slightest & dinner was usually cooked by the time I re-appeared too!

Thanks Adorabelle - it's good to know someone else has survived the same - although at best my lo is going to be 2 weeks old and at worst arrive after MIL has! Our house is also quite small and not soundproof at all(!). I'm not someone who enjoys visitors being around 24/7 at the best of times - I am also worried that DH will turn against me in support of her if I so much as express a need for her to go out for a walk / leave us in peace for a while. She is 70+ and although mobile, not enough to be of any physical help. So many people have told him that 6 weeks is the magic number for PIL's etc to visit but he doesn't seem to 'hear'. I tried to explain it's like him having a prostate operation and my Mum coming to stay for a week as soon as he gets out of hospital..he didn't agree at all. I just don't want any fallings out or for us to b at logger heads - I know what I'm like when I'm tired and I really don't want to be picking up the bill on this occasion.

I had ds1 2 weeks before christmas and ds2 4 days after christmas. Ds1 was a natural birth and I was ok for christmas although i did have to bf whilst eating my xmas dinner!!lol Make sure you get everyone else to so the washing up, cooking etc and pass baby to a relative at some point during the day so you can take a nap (grandparents love nothing more that taking babies for walks) Remember this will be your first xmas as a mum so relax and enjoy it!!

Thanks Adorabelle - it's good to know someone else has survived the same - although at best my lo is going to be 2 weeks old and at worst arrive after MIL has! Our house is also quite small and not soundproof at all(!). I'm not someone who enjoys visitors being around 24/7 at the best of times - I am also worried that DH will turn against me in support of her if I so much as express a need for her to go out for a walk / leave us in peace for a while. She is 70+ and although mobile, not enough to be of any physical help. So many people have told him that 6 weeks is the magic number for PIL's etc to visit but he doesn't seem to 'hear'. I tried to explain it's like him having a prostate operation and my Mum coming to stay for a week as soon as he gets out of hospital..he didn't agree at all. I just don't want any fallings out or for us to b at logger heads - I know what I'm like when I'm tired and I really don't want to be picking up the bill on this occasion.

oops sorry!