what's the oddest thing someone's said to you just after you've given birth.

[justwantcheese]

Fil, on visiting in delivery suite. Bet you can't wait to go car booting now!

You still look pregnant, you will need to start exercising. Said by mil 12 hours after EMCS when I still was attached to a catheter and drip.

1 hour after the birth of first baby Mil said "put some lippy on, no excuse to let yourself go"!

A few hours after the birth and I am in bed in the hospital and notes were being taken the doctor asked me if I had thought about contraception for the future. I was 32 at the time!

2 weeks after my c section and I was back in my normal clothes feeling great and very proud of myself for not putting on too much weight or getting stretch marks my grandmother said ooohhhh you've got your belly to lose !!! Wtf !!!

Very premature DD in NICU, from rather ignorant and insensitive 'friend' "Is it not really weird, coming home from the hospital without your baby?" Well, it's not the way we planned it .......
Special care nurse: "Make the most of the free babysitting" Mmmm, yeah, coz we really feel like kicking our heels after a traumatic EMCS, and long days in special care. Again,

iknowWho forgive me if I am being dozy...but what has being 32 got to do with your future contraception?

Fan thats what my niece said to me three days after an emergency c section! "You still look pregnant Aunty Nerd"

She was only 15 but still!

thespoken The way it was said to me sounded like I was a feckless young lass who hadn't a clue and was stunned to find my self pregnant and having a baby.
At the age of 32 DS was very much planned and wanted and I knew excatly what to do to prevent another baby if I had wished.

The whole coversation was condensending.

"Cover yourself up! No need to be a naturist" from midwife about 2 hours post EMCS. I still didn't have any feeling from waist down but was trying to bf dd2 as best as I could manage

"You'll be wanting to get rid of that" (MIL poking my belly 24hrs after giving birth). Err, yes, all in good time... Still tease her about it.

My brother - 2 hours after giving birth to DC3 - " so will you now be making preparations for the menopause?" I was 38. How does one make preparations for the menopause exactly? [ grin]

iknowwho, it's standard procedure to ask about contraception, whether you're 16 or 46. Pregnancies v close together are often unplanned and not wonderful for a woman's health (and actually a lot of woman don't realise how quickly post birth they could conceive again) so they ask as a matter of course. Please don't feel patronised.

showfhands I couldn't care less now. My baby making days are long over but at the time I felt I'd hardly drawn a breath, had just been stiched up and was going to be in hospital for best part of a week.

I felt the conversation would have been better a day or two later when I might have been more response to a chat!

"I should have been off shift an hour ago..."

Said the MW literally moments after DS made his dramatic entrance into the world, tearing my nether regions to shreds.

I think I might have muttered at her that I was sorry but my baby didn't know what time of day it was.

About 8 hours after an EMCS and 40 hours labour:

FIL: "Well, that's your bikini days behind you."

my brother was asked to drop something off, he came between delivery and stitches and exp was in the toilet at the time and so DB came into delivery room, he looked a bit perplexed at this despite having 2 dcs of his own and on entering he said, "god it stinks in here".

Erm a "relative" fell on my ceasarean stitches in the hospital bed - they tripped. Landed on their elbow, and managed to rip the stiches. When I shot up in bed and screamed in agony (about 10 hours after op)said "You need to pull yourself together, you have a baby for Gods Sake". Fucker. Yeah, lets see how you feel having a nurse fish arround in an open wound to try and fish stitches out.

My DB when he visited, about 4 hours after birth "you look like you've got another one in there".

(Evil-Step) MIL on first visit with us after DD1 arrived "Wow! Are you having another one....Hahahahahaha!"

and another odd one from friend visited whilst I was still in both me ad dd very ill needing antibiotics for strep B. My friend anounced whilst holding dd she had been on steroids for 2 weeks due to teriible chest infection. I did ask her to leave and she no longer talks to me as a result.

I wasn't warned about the back passage :( consultant just...did it. Nearly shot off the back of the bed

Ah ok I understand now re back passage - I never had that, not that I'm jealous you understand, just curious!

i dont remember you eating that

'Are you sure that one's yours?' said the MW pointing to my hour old DD lying in the crib beside me.

Agh! I'd blocked out the back passage part and remembered it reading this thread!