8 year old anxiety - don't know where to turn

[alwaysscared]

My 8 year old DS is extremely anxious at the moment. He has been out of school since May and has been having a tutor twice a week. He is on the waiting list for CAHMS and also in the pathway for assessment of ADD and ASD.
His anxiety has massively increased these past few days. He had a panic attack on the park a couple of days ago and has been having them regularly every day, and not sleeping until 1am at night due to anxiety.
What do I do? Where do I turn? I have ring the CAHMS emergency line and they are getting back to me today but have already told me that he will be on the waiting list for a long time.
I suffer with bad mental health myself (so of course I am blaming myself) but am completely out of my depth with this.
He won't leave the house, and even the thought of it sets off a panic attack.
What can I do??

Oh, @alwaysscared, you must be exhausted...just reading about all you've done last week has tired me out....I'm so sorry you and DS are going through this hard time.

@alwaysscared It sounds like he's maybe reached his limit and needs a break again. That is a lot of activities in a row for a child who is struggling. With my ASD kids, if they're in a good place during the holidays we tend to do maybe 2 or 3 small activities a week (the park for an hour or two/ go to a cafe/ see friends) or 1 bigger activity a week (full day out/ lunch out plus park or shops) and if they're burnt out we do maybe 1 small thing a week and the rest is garden/ play out the front of the house/ play minecraft/ watch youtube and have close family only over. And tbh, I get burnt out and overwhelmed quite quickly if I try to do more than described as well (also autistic).

@Sweetpea1532 thank you
@DinosaurOfFire yes I'm burnt out and overwhelmed too, it's just such a massive change to how he was pre COVID that I think we assume he will get back to how he was then, but he won't as he was masking then I think. It just seems like he is in sensory overload most of the time at the moment

@alwaysscared
Bless his heart❤
With all the upheaval that's been going on with the pandemic it's no wonder he, like many people are feeling anxious and overwhelmed. Taking this into account, it does make sense that he's not where he was pre-covid like you mentioned. You're doing a champion job as his mom. I know it is challenging for you...hang in there , ÀLWAYS❤

I massage ds feet firmly and have booked a reflexology course so I can do it properly. We also do mindfulness and breathing. He is back in with us at the moment and my DH is really good at relaxing stories. Mindful stories on a phone are also useful as are sea noises/ white noise. I also went on a reiki course which helps with the tummy aches and the stress that stop him falling asleep.

@somethingischasingme unfortunately due to sensory issues he doesn't like to be touched while anxious

I'm worried about him, he's pale, has a cold sore and sore lips and bags under his eyes. He is such a picky eater that he is not getting the best nutrients. He has a multivitamin each day but it's not helping. What can I give him to boost him, he's so run down 😞

Poor child..he must be in agony.
It sounds as if he may have a vitamin B deficiency...especially B12 and riboflavin, B6 and folate....many nerve related issues can be caused by vitamin B deficiency. It would be beneficial to have an exam and testing by a GP to make sure. Sometimes it's not as simple as just being in need of a vitamin supplement...a deficiency can be caused by the body's inability to absorb certain vitamins. Vitamin B comes in a sub-lingual liquid...it he's terrified of going to the GP maybe a nutritionist can advise what to do. Thinking of you, OP.
Do you remember what soothed him as an infant? Maybe that might help soothe his anxiousness.

@LizzieAnt thank you for the advice and sorry your DS is going through similar, although it seems you are further along the journey than us.
I'm going to ask about melatonin when we get to see someone.
We are all just so tired and want our happy boy back. I just keep crying today (not in front of him)

Hope you're okay OP and that your DS gets to see someone very soon

We are still not back at school. He has been off since May and I can't see him going to his new school for a long while 😫 so it's back to me homeschooling. We are getting a new OOST tutor who is primary trained which is good.
I am not a teacher, I never wanted to be a teacher but here I am trying to teach my highly anxious 8 year old. It's so hard, just waiting for support and referrals. New school are really good and are happy for him to start whenever, but I can't see it being until at least the new year. I'm really struggling

@alwaysscared
Hang in there! You are only meant to be DSs mum...and you are doing a phenomenal job!
I hope the OOST tutor works out and that this stupid virus goes back to wherever it came from...enough already, covid19, with you and your variants! Go away! You have done enough damage already!
(Sorry for the rant but I'm am fed up with this virus business and nothing else has worked)

@Sweetpea1532 thank you. I hope the tutor works out 🤞

Me, too, @alwaysscared
We are all pulling for you

If he has not gone out much it’s like it he has low vit d which can also trigger depression - best to put him on a daily v d we use the better you vit d you can get from Amazon.