your child freedom formula - has anyone tried it?

[lu9months]

ive seen adverts for this on fb. they claim to be able to cure anxiety in young people. im suspicious - and nowhere does it tell you the cost. however im fairly desperate since my 16 year old is very disabled by anxiety. thanks

CBT is based on the theory that the way we think about situations affects the way we feel and behave. It's about interrupting that cycle, by e.g. challenging negative thoughts. There ya go - CBT in a nutshell.
Honestly the similarities between these positive posts is astounding, waffle, can't possibly explain, passive aggressiveness, and implication. It reminds me of the style of the website which makes me wonder who's writing the posts.

Would you expect a conventional CBT therapist to explain to you how to get well in a few bullet points?

Yes, 100% I would expect this. You can Google it, after all!
www.nhs.uk/mental-health/talking-therapies-medicine-treatments/talking-therapies-and-counselling/cognitive-behavioural-therapy-cbt/overview/

@MumOf2Teens2020

I don’t see why you aren’t able to state the aims in a short paragraph??

My therapist friend uses CBT to help young people with anxiety. I just googled this:

CBT aims to stop negative cycles such as these by breaking down things that make you feel bad, anxious or scared. By making your problems more manageable, CBT can help you change your negative thought patterns and improve the way you feel.

If you aren’t able to state what their formula is, is it possible to get YCFF to provide a succinct paragraph that states their formulas aims..??

Sadly I doubt it ... My DH had a try (following me explaining my friends situation):

YCFF aims to take disproportionate amounts of money from desperate parents of anxious teens who ideally have anxiety themselves and provide the same message repetitively to them in different formats to help do what CBT does (read above) and if there is non-compliance in the formula to belittle and criticise parents and teens for not fully engaging in the process this rendering it impossible for them to claim their money back.

Please feel free to correct him...

Shall I give this another go? Why not.

Mum No one is asking you to write down the whole 'very involved' process. Just a few things you as a family have been asked/suggested to change. The 'strategies and behaviour changes' you talk about.

For what it's worth if this was sold as: 'A supportive environment which guides using our experience ways in which a family can best support and challenge an anxious teen out of their anxious behaviour. By providing our regular mentoring sessions you get support every day as a family and for the teen themselves, which means that issues can be addressed on the day and in the moment rather than waiting for a weekly therapy session. This regular support is expensive to provide, but generally we find the intensive approach works in a shorter timescale than weekly sessions as the support and encouragement helps families push through difficulties.' I'd think, OK that sounds reasonable.

However it seems to be being (over)sold as something much more, but something that no one seems to be able to explain or give examples of.

A clandestine formula at 5K to cure children's anxiety disorder?

Snake oil and cat in the sack come to mind.

Parent-Led CBT for Child Anxiety: Helping Parents Help Their Kids is a great resource.

You can get it on Amazon

@WilderBeth I bet that great Book you’ve recommended isn’t £5k is it?

And I fear it’s far worse than Snake oil and cat in the sack come to mind.

I can absolutely see now why we the mums who have decided to commit to this are giving their best to explain to you ALL their experiences as you have ALL stated it’s about a page to HELP others gain an understanding, you ask for people to explain to you in bullet point again this is not easy because there is a lot of information, it is almost impossible because EVERY SINGLE FAMILY and EVERY SINGLE CHILD is completely different! My friend has had 4 children all of which are completely different! The Whole point of this forum is to not be bitching about people experiences and then picking them apart because then I could ask you some really sensitive questions asking you what points helped your family, some people wouldn’t want to talk about that on a site where everyone nit picks your experiences etc.... if your friend has had a bad time why waste your energy on ruining someone else’s hope for a better life just message privately it’s not helping anyone ? Also go and look on the website, book in a week free do whatever you need to do for your family to get the help you need! Again everyone is different! I would tell you all the lovely things going on but you guys will rip it to shreds like you have everything else? I’m fed up now of having notifications pop up of people being negative! It’s a very sad and unfortunate thing for mums of our age to still be like this! You literally now have a week to do it and see if you don’t like it etc? But don’t be rude about people who are actually trying, I know I am going to get some replies from this but at the end of the day I know who the select few are on here who seem to be just throwing hate at everyone who has tried it! If you don’t want to try it that’s up to you but then don’t start trying to make other people’s experiences undervalued! Thank you that’s all I have to say on this matter!

The hate you're perceiving is just not there, if you read it with fresh eyes. There is no need to get notifications you don't want, you can turn them off. I would happily explain further how different techniques we've tried have (or have not) worked, but that's not what this thread is for, we're asking about one specific approach.
People questioning does seem to be massively affecting you, you are taking it very personally. Assuming you do not run YCFF then this really isn't personal to you.

@JungleMum40 You always seem to be so angry, and use such strong negative words to describe other mums with children battling various manifestations of anxiety.

@WilderBeth Will look up that book, thanks x

I am angry, I’m angry at the fact that all the mums who have commented about their experiences you guys have just ripped them apart ? There is no need for this, the compassion we should have for someone who is actually trying and making it work ? There is no need for the hatful comments on people’s lives I don’t understand it at all? This is particularly why I am so frightened of my daughter having a phone because of social media and it doesn’t get any better when we’re older

@InspectorHastings
I am not taking it personally I’m frustrated because you mums are not listening to people? Instead of saying yeah that’s really nice that you’re trying something you’re not! No it has become personal to me because you are underpinning my experience and other peoples.

We are trying to give information to those who want to make an informed decision about whether to try YCFF for their anxious child; if you want to do it then do it. If it helps you then that’s great BUT if you aren’t sure, cant afford £5k or want to understand the formula, then this thread (and all the comments on it!) is relevant, important and entirely appropriate. You do not have to post and defend the formula if you’re happy - step away and get on with what you’re doing. Every defensive comment made only reinforces the assertions that YCFFs practices are unscrupulous.

My friend who had a very bad experience with YCFF also suggests you check out Sam Robins LinkedIn profile which she says is full of ‘fabrications and untruths’...

Hello, I've been off this thread for a while as I was getting a bit obsessed with it . I get the feeling that we on this thread are providing a free focus group service for YCFF, they have made a lot of changes to their website and trustpilot replies based on this thread.

Still a few things worry me.

1.The public sharing of identifying information (parents and children's names on website and in Trustpilot replies)

1. Id like to understand what strategies they have to cope with a child who was extremely resistant to coming to the sessions.

1. The posters on this thread who are coming on to 'defend' YCFF. Their writing style is wierdly similar - lots of ?? and !!, Very confrontational, very defensive. Finishing each post with "I'm done, I don't have time for this, you do you, good luck" etc and then coming back multiple times.

1. The mysterious "formula" that no one could understand without spending £££.

It's perfectly possible to give an overview of how a particular program works, to help others decide whether it might be helpful to them and their child. For example, this is how the parenting program that I attended helped me with managing my dd's anxiety:

1. Providing a fixed time each week to focus on learning about and understanding anxiety.
2. Providing a safe relaxed but confidential space for parents to open up and share their experiences, good and bad, successes and failures etc.
3. Guidance from two experienced and qualified professionals to facilitate this.
4. Ground rules about confidentiality, and also one of the most important ground rules we had was that if a session got too much, anyone could get up and leave, there was a designated area where one of the professional group leaders would come to check up on how you were and if you needed any help.
5. Evaluation of the course throughout and at the end. This was managed independently of the group leaders.
6. Learning about the pyramid model (loosely based on Maslow's hierarchy of needs) to understand how we needed to create a base and work up from there. IE there's no point trying to tackle "top level" behaviours without first making underlying changes, to the relationship between you and your child.
7. Learning the physiology of anxiety and strategies to help our children to overcome it in the moment. Breaking the thoughts feelings behaviour cycle to stop feeding into our child's anxiety. Learning the physical symptoms of anxiety (fight or flight response) and how to use strategies to work with it.
8. Having a group of parents going through similar experience was extremely supportive and helpful. We even formed our own WhatsApp group after the program finished and continued to support each other.

The course above was provided by CAMHS. I understand it was something of a pilot project so don't know how widely it is used. Children meanwhile were engaged in therapy, groups etc also within Camhs.

I totally understand that CAMHS is overstretched and in many cases doesn't provide what young people need. If anyone is offered this program PACE) I'd be happy to tell you more or answer any questions.

I also have experience of using Psychiatry UK for a private ADHD diagnosis. I'd be happy to give details of that too, both positives and negatives.

@Mibb2 - I think yours is a fabulous post. Thank you for sharing this amazing resource.

My freind just shared this link with me:

www.yourchildfreedomformula.com/post/a-secret-technique

Objectively, what do you think and feel when you watch this?

I rest my case! I have no more interest in reacting to this anymore! You guys, people will read all of these comments and see for themselves there is about 6 of you just ripping people to bits! And then saying it’s weirdly similar! I am my own person with my own experiences and you guys then accuse of things? I am going through a very tough time! I have no doubt that non of you actually have any intention in trying so what’s the point in me wasting my time! You all have fun talking amongst yourselves while I am living my life with a Happy daughter, this is not the way forward for you guys but you carry on with doing whatever you think is best and I will as well you also don’t have any power over my daughters life and her experiences and you certainly have no compassion.

@JungleMum40 I’m sorry you’re going through a tough time. Believe that I am full of compassion for all and any parents having a challenging time; I’ve been there too .

Cynically though I wonder if this is why you were deemed an appropriate person to join YCFF?

No-one has ripped anyone to shreds. We have not ripped the content to shreds (given what we know it is).

We are ripping the unscrupulous practices (excessive cost/intimidation tactics etc etc) of YCFF to shreds and that (in my mind in any case) is quite different.

@GoodButNaughty Thank you for that I think that is what I needed to hear someone who just understands,

I don’t believe at all on any level these people are doing any harm in fact they are just there as a massively helpful, resourceful and are focused on getting our children better. I wouldn’t waste my time if I thought it wasn’t good for its money, and I know everyone wants to get their value for money, if you don’t think this is it then don’t do it, but at the end of the day it’s for life and this thread has caused me to become more upset, I’m sorry your friend went through a tough time but this isn’t the way to deal with those pent up feelings. I hope you all find some closure. Bye guys

Hi junglemum40, it's really unhelpful to come onto a thread for parents of anxious children and strongly imply that they are not wanting the best for their kids, because they are discussing this company. I have read this whole thread and have not seen anyone being hateful or ripping anyone to shreds. Some people have got a bit impatient or gone a bit over the top but on the whole the discussion seems to have been fairly calm and a few posters have made quite a commitment to sharing their own experiences.

The strong theme throughout has been a concern for parents who are in a vulnerable place being convinced to part with a lot of money, and whether what YCFF offers is worth the price.

This is not about telling parents who are using the program that they are foolish or deluded, so I'm sorry you've felt that way.

I just want you to know that your message has upset me a bit, after I spent quite a long time composing a post to share my experience of a similar parenting program. I will get over it, but I am conscious that not everyone on here will be in a similar place in terms of their mental health at the moment.

At the start of September I was as stressed as Jungle sounds. Luckily I was able to turn to adoption support and also a good friend found a counsellor for me (as I didn't even have the strength to do that for myself).
I hope Jungle that it works for you, and that one day when you are feeling more relaxed and objective you will revisit this thread and see that people aren't 'hating or 'attacking', and you may be able to summarise things for future readers.

Cross post with Good and Jungle. Good explained it better than me.

@JungleMum40 I feel that you misunderstood my posy a bit but hey ho...

@Mibb2 please be as kind and compassionate with yourself as your post was. It really was hugely helpful and I truly believe many readers will benefit from it; they may not feel able to post messages of thanks but I will again. You’re very kind to take the time to share this.

No worries Good I'm really happy to share,(probably ramble on a bit much tbh!)

'None of you have any intention in trying' with respect you have no clue what I have, or have not tried for my daughter.