If you didn't want to breastfeed/did want to, but didn't breastfeed for as long as you wanted/didn't want to breastfeed, but then did, can you have a look at this thread, please?

[hunkermunker]

A lot is done to try to persuade people to breastfeed.

Personally, I think a lot of it takes the wrong tone and misses the point wholeheartedly; in fact, I think some of the bf promotion does more harm than good. I am, for instance, not a fan of militant lactivism.

I realise that the thread title is a bit broad, and I did consider starting three separate ones, but I thought that may be too much. So, three questions on the same thread instead. And feel free to just splurge your experience - I like splurged experiences! Only if it's not too prickly and upsetting though - I know that this can be a pretty damn raw subject. Thank you in advance

1. If you didn't want to breastfeed, was there anything that could have changed your mind? Antenatally? Postnatally?

1. If you did want to, but didn't breastfeed for as long as you wanted, what would have helped you? Antenatally? Postnatally?

1. If you didn't want to breastfeed, but then did, what changed your mind and when did you change your mind? How long did you breastfeed for?

I have been reading this thread all morning and have been so touched by some of the stories, so angry but others and laughed at (with) others! My DH keeps trying to talk to me and I keep shushing him because I am trying read!!

I am breastfeeding DD1 at the moment and she just turned one. I have no idea when I will stop as she still breastfeeds 8 maybe 9 times a day and I still love it so its ok for the time being.

We participated in NCT classes and had a proper pro-breastfeeding dictator lecture us for three and a half hours (it was supposed to be 1.5) on why we must breastfeed. I had joined the class with the intention of breastfeeding (my Mum did, her Mum did etc) but her attitude made me want to announce that I was never even going to try. On the other hand she brought dolls into the class so we could all practice the latch before we gave birth and when I did give birth I followed exact directions and immediately established a great breastfeeding relationship with my daughter.

I am eternally grateful to her but you couldn't pay me to sit through another one of her lectures.

In the hospital I noticed that the best advice came from midwives who had breastfed themselves. They were the most supportive, patient and helpful. The women who had not breastfed seemed to resent having to help out and were less compassionate - they also offered my daughter a bottle when she was hungry one night and the little munchkin never left the 99th percentile.

The other thing that I found supportive was great practical advice from my extended family. The best cure for cracked nipples was sunlight - just a couple of minutes after each feed, pre-lanolin. Boy was that a saviour as I was bleeding and in agony!

We plan to have more DC and I hope that I will get to breastfeed those too!

1. Good support and care for parents of SCBU babies would have helped me a lot in the hospital I was in there was nothing for us. The midwifes didn't really have time for us because we weren't on the ward and the neo natal staff were busy caring for the babies. Plus some focussed support for mum's who have to express because baby can't or won't take the breast. My milk ran out on Christmas day when ds was ten days old. Oh and a neo--natal homecare nurse who didn't think that breastfeeding was the work of the devil.

that should have read ten weeks old. whoops

Riven, agree that expressing to feed is exhausting. It's just a never ending cycle of feed, express, store, wash sterilise and get up and start again. We were under instruction to feed ds every 3 hours whether he liked it or not so nights were exhausting when we got home, I think I got about 30 minutes sleep every three hours if I was lucky

MyTiChaSte, it's lovely you had a great bf experience and you're continuing to do so

I am an NCT bfc and I wonder if things happened the way you say they did - really puzzled by this. NCT breastfeeding classes normally last 2 or 2.5 hours - I have never heard of one lasting 3.5 hours and certainly never heard of one being 'billed' as lasting 1.5 hours. We don't lecture - the classes are interactive (as indeed you found with the dolls) . If the counsellor you had gave a lecture, then she needs to get feedback to say this is how it came across, and you need to report this to your branch, and to the organisation - I can assure you that your complaint would be investigated.

Benefits of breastfeeding are normally a very small part of the class. The class aims to give people information and confidence in their own ability to breastfeed. If you felt the class was a 'stage' for instructing you all on why you 'must' breastfeed, then this class was a failure of communication and you need to complain. It's only a year ago - it's not too late.

(I'd also add that it wouldn't normally be thought of as good practice for midwives to say what their own feeding experience was - and actually it should be irrelevant. Plenty of great, supportive midwives have never actually breastfed themselves!)

i refer to ds1 because i am still BF ds and happy with that.

i did want to BF ds1 and i BF until 7 weeks. the reason i gave up was because i didn't know enough about BFing to know that we were at a classic growth spurt time. it wasn't ever mentioned to me by midwife or HV or anyone else i came into contact with in those early weeks. i received bad advice from a midwife. she suggested i wasn't producing enough milk and i should top up with formula. this was at 5 weeks so i did and as you can imagine, my milk supply dwindled until i really wasn't producing enough at 7 weeks so gave up.

for me the thing that would have helped me to continue would have been knowing more about the actual biology (if that is the right word) of breastfeeding. i mean, it would have helped if i had known then how BF was a supply and demand thing and that my milk supply would respond to increased suckling. also if i had been told when teh key growth spurt times were.

this time round i still didn't get any of this information but decided to educate myself. i have to be honest and say MN was vital to this task. i really do not think i would still be BFing ds2 if i hadn't found MN.

so really more info before birth on the way BF works and a rough idea of when to expect the growth spurts. also, midwifes with up to date info would help alot.

sorry my first line should read,"i am still BFing ds2 and happy with that."