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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

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Original poster

Breast vs. bottle (am I brave or insane?)

227 replies

emkana · 09/07/2005 21:49

article in Times today

What interests me, both in this article and in previous threads on the Mumsnet, is how there is a feeling that the "breastfeeding lobby" or "mafia" as I believe it has been called is regarded as so powerful and influential and as having such a large impact on new mothers everywhere to make their lives an utter misery. I just can't see it! I see formula etc. on sale everywhere, articles on how to bottlefeed in every baby magazine, which always always say that you shouldn't feel guilty for bottlefeeding, I see bottlefeeding on TV, I see bottlefeeding celebrities, bottlefeeding mothers at toddler groups...
Breastfeeding? I vaguely remember a poster on the maternity ward, but it wasn't particularly in your face. I might have been given a leaflet on breastfeeding by the midwife. That's it.

I just don't get it, I really don't.
I don't mean to upset anyone, by the way. I'm just genuinely interested in your experiences. Honestly.

OP posts:

fsmail · 09/07/2005 22:55

I had no problems with my second and am still doing it at 12 months. She was really good at night though. Only woke up once even on her first night. DS was up every hour and found it very draining. I always thought it was a girl thing though as all the women who managed to bf first time seemed to have girls and all the strugglers had boys but daren't say that now as got told off last time.

dinny · 09/07/2005 22:56

Nbq, ds still feeds about every 3 hours at night. we just co-sleep (though at the moment we are trying to get him out of our bed - well, dh is, not me - and so I just go and feed him when he hollers. most nights it's 7pm bedtime feed, 10pm, 2am, 5am, 7am and then up for the day. going back to work in two weeks! God knows what'll happen then!

hercules · 09/07/2005 22:56

the research into that didnt differntiate between breastfed babies and bottlefed ones. Co sleeping increases the chances of bf and bf babies appear to have smaller risk of cot death. Bf mums are also meant to adopt a naturally protective position in bed as well which bottlefeeding mums dont. The babymilk in action organisation produced some interesting stuff about this.

Nbg · 09/07/2005 22:56

I'd love to think that when I have no.2 I could BF so I can experience the closeness and bonding that people talk about but I don't think I can forget the advantages of Bottle feeding and I can't see combining would be successful.

misdee · 09/07/2005 22:57

[walk away]

berolina · 09/07/2005 22:57

fs, my mw actually said that boys tend to have more probs bf, esp with latching on.

hercules · 09/07/2005 22:57

why, misdee?

Original poster

emkana · 09/07/2005 22:58

Well, misdee, don't walk away - I'm really proud of us all tonight, over 100 posts and it's not a slanging match!

OP posts:

dinny · 09/07/2005 22:59

fsmail, I was the other way round - girl = struggled, boy =fine. my friends kind of disprove your theory as the only people I know first time round with bf probs (3 out of about 15) had girls.

hunkermunker · 09/07/2005 23:00

I've been told I was "like the natives" for still bfeeding when he was 9mo.

Have had all kinds of "wouldn't it be better for him to be on cow's milk now he's one" comments too.

Told by GP that I should feed for 6 months only, if I had to and that "they bite"...

So the message may well be breast is best, but just don't do it for too long, m'kay, pervert

Very interested in this paragraph from the article:

"The National Childbirth Trust (NCT), which promotes breast-feeding, rejects the Kent study because it is funded by the Infant and Dietetic Foods Association, which represents the manufacturers of formula milk. ?I would have written the same report if it had been funded by the Department of Health,? Lee responds."

Always suspicious of where funding comes from in studies like this.

tabitha · 09/07/2005 23:01

Nbq, when I bottlefed I thought that it was more convenient and easier than bottlefeding but after (at last ) sucessfuly breastfeeding I really do think that, once it's established, it's much easier than having to clean, sterilise and make up bottles every day.
Only advantage was that my 3 bottlefed babies all slept through the night much earlier than the breastfed one although that might just be a coincidence.

QueenOfQuotes · 09/07/2005 23:01

"qoq, maybe women in those countries learn through informal 'support' networks - from watching and discussing with aunts, big sisters, friends etc?"

No they don't - they're simply expected to "get on with it" and quite often get laughed at if they ask "how"

My last thoughts on this subject

When I 'failed' at BF with DS2 at 5 days old - yes I did feel guilty. But I now know the reason why I felt guilty. It was because of the term "failed" and the way it was used. I'd always had it drummed into me (as lots of people do) that "Breast is Best" and everywhere I looked at places about giving up breastfeeding the word "guilt" and "failed" were always pretty close together. It was like I was supposed to feel guilty that it hadn't worked out that if for whatever reason it didn't work out then I'd "failed". That if I stopped breastfeeding then I wouldn't be doing the "best" for my child. Other mums, both bottlefeeders and breastfeeders would 'expect' me to feel guilty and also used the term "failed" frequently - so in effect not only had I had drummed into me that "breast was best" but that I should feel guilty and feel like I'd "failed"

No where did I see/hear that it was normal not to feel guilty that I was no longer Breastfeeding. The expectation, from other mums, HV, magazines etc was that I would feel "guilty" and I did (for a short time until reality kicked in)

lockets · 09/07/2005 23:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

dinny · 09/07/2005 23:02

Berolina - just think they say whatever to make whoever they are speaking to feel better! my bf counsellor said (after my exp with dd) that she hoped I would have a "big strong boy next" as boys generally much better feeders. it did turn out like that too (happily }
ps so glad to hear bf going so well for you and ds now, many congrats for your amazing tenacity and strength x

Original poster

emkana · 09/07/2005 23:03

"qoq, maybe women in those countries learn through informal 'support' networks - from watching and discussing with aunts, big sisters, friends etc?"

No they don't - they're simply expected to "get on with it" and quite often get laughed at if they ask "how"

How do you know that, QofQ?

OP posts:

dinny · 09/07/2005 23:04

yeah, of course she'd have written the same report, regardless of funding, HM...

hunkermunker · 09/07/2005 23:04

Was asked at booking in how I was going to feed my baby. I said "with the placenta for a while longer, I hope"

dinny · 09/07/2005 23:04

pmsl!

jessicaandbumpsmummy · 09/07/2005 23:04

When i had jess, i was asked in the hopsital whether i was breast or bottle feeding. Taking into consideration she was my first baby, i was handed her and told "she needs to feed" and the mw promptly left the room.... wasnt shown how or anything, hence giving up on day 4.

This time i hope to be able to do it for longer, but as my original post said, a tin of formula and the steriliser will be on hand.

QueenOfQuotes · 09/07/2005 23:06

"How do you know that, QofQ?"

Because I lived in one of those countries for 2 1/2yrs!

berolina · 09/07/2005 23:07

hm - lol at 'they bite', but a bit too
qoq - i think the use of 'failure' refers to those women who do feel they've 'failed' if they give up bf, but doesn't and shouldn't imply you have to feel like that - but having faced the possibility of 'failure' (please note quote marks!!!) i do know where you're coming from.

berolina · 09/07/2005 23:08

dinny - aw shucks

misdee · 09/07/2005 23:10

because it will undoubtadly get heated.

i am being asked a lot now if i am still breatfeeding. i was told that with dd1 she wasnt thriving on breastmilk and to top up. she was slow to gain, but then dd2 and dd3 were slow to gain in the first few months then lept up that 'charts'. feel i failed dd1 in some ways by not feeding her for longer, but at the end of the day i was 1st time mum and 'listened' to the HV. now i dont. they even came round to do a weaning talk at b4 4months old. heh. no wonder i dont pay them attention.

dinny · 09/07/2005 23:10

Berolina

hercules · 09/07/2005 23:11

so how do they succeed then?

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