Horrible experience breastfeeding in boots.

[nomorelostweekends]

So despite their fantastic breastfeeding policy, it appears that Boots has not got its act together in ensuring that staff are familiar with it. Yesterday I went into a city centre branch without a feeding room and asked to use one of the chairs in the pharmacy waiting area to feed DD2 (tho not sure why I asked in hindsight). The assistant refused, saying that methadone users picked up their prescriptions in the same area. I then asked her if there was someone else I could feed in the store. She stated that the store did not have feeding facilities and directed me to another branch in the city centre. I told her that I didn?t want to walk to the other branch. DD was screaming, I was very hot and the town centre was very busy. I said I was happy to feed anywhere in the store, didn?t care if people saw me and just needed a chair. The assistant repeated that there were no feeding facilities in the store and that I should go to the other one.

By this point there were loads of other customers waiting and I was getting really stressed. I asked if I could use the pharmacists consulting room, which the store has. She initially refused, then agreed to ask the pharmacist. The pharmacist came over and said I could not use the room as she was not sure if they were insured and that was not its purpose. I was about to give up and leave when the pharmacist said she would speak to the manager. The manager obviously said it was fine because I was then taken to the room, although the staff member taking me was very preoccupied by the fact it had a window( thought this was odd at the time, but following later events it made sense!)

Once in the room a member of staff came in and said she was waiting behind the door but that she would have her back to me! I started to feed and over heard the staff member waiting outside the door having a conversation with a man, who I assumed was a member of staff (the room was not in a public area). During this conversation the man clearly said ?She can breastfeed me if she wants?- the member of staff by the door then said ?sush, she can hear you?.. As I left I asked the staff member standing outside the door if the man was a member of Boots staff. She was evasive, but asked if I heard the ?comments?, (suggesting he had made more). Then she said ?sorry, you shouldn?t have heard that, then said ?you know what men are like? and finally asked me not to take it any further (I assumed this meant not to complain).

I rang Boots this morning to explain what happened and am waiting for a response. Am interested to know if anyone else has tried to feed in stores without feeding rooms and how they have got on? Have to say, I have done it once before, 3 years ago in a different branch and they couldn?t have been more helpful. So its not all bad.

MadameC:"Oh for gooodness sake - there was a chair - she asked if she could use it and wasn't told no!"

and "I think your attitude stinks - they need to provide a chair - they did that but you chose not to use it."

You are wrong, as well as unpleasant:

The OP says "[I] asked to use one of the chairs in the pharmacy waiting area to feed DD2 (tho not sure why I asked in hindsight). The assistant refused,"

Bully for you that you can breastfeed whilst tap-dancing or whatever. Many can't. Esp w a 5 week old.

I loathe this kind of 'stuff and nonsense, what's the bally problem? The cows on the estate don't seem to have any problem with it' bullshit. It's so.. contemptuous of others.

And in fact, you sound rather more emotional about it than anyone else.

There is a point to make about the way that 'private rooms' make breastfeeding 'obscene' (lit: 'off-stage), but this certainly is not the way to go about it making that point.

And I reckon the 'she can breastfeed me any time' comment is WELL beyond the usual purse-lipped anti-breastfeeding stuff. It is sexually offensive (both to you, AND the female assistant) and I would have no hesitation in trying to get him sacked. What a vile man.

just realised I completely missed the point of the man's comment - I didn't see the "me". I actually thought he was sticking up for her! What a weirdo

I agree obm, at best it's a teenage-style comment, and worst it's a pervy thing to say - even to think - but he said it out loud!

I assume that Boots have a social media team and will be having frantic reputation-management telephone calls as we speak. This kind of thing has a hugely negative impact on the perception of the brand, and the combination of anti-breastfeeding and sexual comments about customers is very bad news for them.

Agree with everyone who thinks the way Boots staff behaved was appalling and contravenes their employers stated policy. And I think the man who made sexual remarks should be sacked - or at the very least given a final warning (i.e. it was serious enough to go to 'one more fuck up and you are out on your arse, sonnny').

If you've got the energy with a tiny baby and C-section recovery, I'd put your complain in writing to the chief exec. This is VERY serious indeed especially for a company that makes multi-millions from parents.

Alex Gourlay, Chief Executive of the Health & Beauty Division , Alliance Boots. Head office is: Boots Group PLC
1 Thane Road
Beeston
Nottingham
NG2 3AA

Boots' website states: 'Our customers are at the heart of our business. We're committed to providing exceptional customer and patient care, be the first choice for pharmacy and healthcare, offer innovative products 'only at Boots', with great value our customers love.

'Our people are our strength and they tell us that Boots is a great place to work. We aim to always be the employer of choice, attracting and retaining the most talented and passionate people.'

It's bad because the policy states that a chair should be provided or if the mum wants a private place to feed and there isn't a feeding room then the manager's office etc should be provided.

nomore You know now not to rely on boots for feeding though. Are there any cafes you can use instead next time you are out?

You could also try Customer Services at head office: Boots Customer Care
PO Box 5300
Nottingham
NG90 1AA

Telephone no. 08450 708090

Email address: can't copy and paste it but see this web page

And customer services is open today, try ringing!

What an awful experience for you nomorelostweekends, particularly the 'she can breastfeed me if she wants' comment. I do think you should report the incident to Boots HQ.

That's a lot of assumptions about methadone users there! I know a few recovering heroin addicts/methadone users and wouldn't describe them as particularly unpredictable. In fact, the partner of my ex-flatmate is a long term addict and was prescribed methadone for a while, and he was totally supportive about her breastfeeding their son.

When I was living in Hackney by local pharmacy doled out a lot of methadone and I don't recall witnessing any bad/unpredictable behaviour - there was more bad behaviour in the queue for the post office. People came in, drank their methadone, and left. I don't see how it's a valid reason to stop someone breastfeeding.

i would have got a bit of paper out then told them i was 1 of those shopper people (the ones that rate the stores) that would have shocked them lol. I would deff follow up the complaint. I intend to bf my next baby and when i read the boots policy it made me feel less worried about it (iykwim) but after this i think id probable stick to mothercare

MC. I see what you are saying about breastfeeding shouldn't be hidden away but some new mothers (me included) in the early weeks feel vulnerable and are still getting to grips with positioning and latching and simply don't want rubbernecking

You sound so contemptuous. Like some of the established breastfeeders sneering at anyone who has used a bib or a cover.

You have a valid point, but I think you expressed it awfully and are not at all understanding of some new first time mothers' reluctance to get em out.

I was a bit nervous about breastfeeding in public in the first few weeks -- particularly as I lived in Singapore (nudity an issue in Chinese culture and few breastfeed and there are no laws safeguarding rights) and used a cover. I soon ditched it and now whap em out wherever. I am the same woman I was then but would have hated to come across your vitriolic post in the early days of breastfeeding. Yes, I do think some women can be a little precious but I honestly think it's less to do with them feeling shy, more about not wanting to deal with any nasty comments when they're just starting out breastfeeding.

OP, sorry you had to go through this. I had a nasty comment believe it or not in a children's hospital and I couldn't stop thinking about it and feeling angry for ages.

OP - if it were me I would also let the NCT know about this. They must have quite a lot of leverage in these situations.

Do not let this put you off bf - I bf both my dc's for 2 years each and never encountered anything like this. You have been very unlucky

Here's hoping Boots send you £££'s in vouchers to say sorry and kick that man's ass!

I've breastfed both my children until they were 1yr old and i've always just moved on to somewhere else if i did not feel comfortable.
Why stress yourself out? Babies can feel stress from their mothers, no wonder your baby was screaming.
Just try and chill

I understand why the OP asked permission to breastfeed. BFing is seen as a big deal in the UK, there is so much in the press about it, with shops writting breastfeeding manifestos and the government making laws. If anything it seems more of a big deal to breastfeed now then it did five years ago when I first started bfing.

It's all very well saying you just have to get on with it, bfing anywhere and everywhere without making a fuss, but that takes quite a lot of confidence and experience in bfing.

and it seems almost impossible to bf anywhere and everywhere without being perceived to be making some sort of statement about it.

I b/f my babies until they were a year old too. Babies also scream because they are hungry, and to tell someone that they are to blame for their babies screaming because they are stressed, that they simply need to chill and they should move somewhere else is not helpful in the slightest, is it?

I think a key point here is that the OP is quite a new bfder. And also probably quite tired.

(it sounds like you bf a baby before but some time ago?)

At five weeks, yes, some women do sometimes need a chair, cushions etc etc.

I know plenty of women who, by three or four months, can feed a baby bareback riding and blindfold but who, at 5 weeks, before its all necessarily properly established, do need the whole cushions-chair-etc paraphrenalia.

I think gettting a decent shot at breastfeeding is every mother and child's right (if they want it, not to denigrate formula feeders, etc etc), I think Boots have a well publicised bfding policy which, tbh, is as much done to make a difference to how mothers percieve them as out of the goodness of their hearts. And I think they should be able to find a bfding mother a chair, fgs.

I'd also complain about the very prejudiced comments made about methodone users.

Yay for being uppity. All that means is that you are being assertive and ignoring those who don't think you have a right to be. Obama was called "uppity". Being uppity is how we get stuff to change, its how every oppressed group in society has ever gotten change, so don't worry.

Peronally I wouldn't have asked.

But that is irrelevant. You did ask and you and your baby should have been treated respectfully, rather than told you were not allowed the use of a chair and then had sexually suggestive and puerile comments made about you. How bloody dare he?

In light of the Boots breastfeeding policy I'd make a proper complaint. Point out how it is completely not acceptable for staff to make lewd suggestions about customers.

Very true Filly, on all counts....
Was just musing on this and not only was the OP treated appallingly by almost everyone she came in contact with in the shop, but the comments by the man outside the door, and the comments made about the methodone users who come into the shop, are utterly outrageous.
I think if that had all happened to me when dd was 5 weeks, she would, in all likelihood, have been on the SMA that night.
Thankfully (and you will only usually find me saying this in relation to bf issues) I am in Italy, where I could bf quite happily and unembarassedly in front of absolutely everyone, of any gender, class or choice of substance abuse, and no-one would bat an eyelid.
Agree also with FJ that the shop assistants should not have been commenting on what any of their customer's prescriptions contain.
That said, I imagine if the OP had found herself sitting next to someone waiting for their methodone script, she'd probably have found someone far more humane and accomodating than the people behind the counter. It could hardly have been worse, let's face it.

Have to agree Bucharest. All the smackheads I've ever met are really sweet natured and chilled!

I think tiktok's post of 09:43:00 is extremely sensible. I would have asked to use the chair not because I needed permission to BF but because I was using the chair for something other than what it was intended for, asked out of courtesy. There isnt something wrong or cowardly about asking to use a chair in that situation! The comment from the male member of staff is, I think, very offensive. I would continue with that complaint.

OP- Just to say

• well done for not slinking away with a screaming baby and going elsewhere, but making them stick to their OWN POLICY.
• well done for already trying to make a complaint.
• well done and thank you for letting other mothers know about what happened; forewarned is forearmed!

I will check back on this thread to see what response you get to your complaints (in general, and in particular regarding the lecherous member of staff who should be sacked imo). Hopefully they will be suitably contrite, and I can be confident when I shop in Boots that I'll also be free to breastfeed if the occasion should arise. If not, I'll take my business elsewhere.