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Infant feeding

Get advice and support with infant feeding from other users here.

Original poster

Tiktok are you there? Talk me down from the edge..

123 replies

Tinkerisdead · 02/04/2009 18:54

I cant do a link (im sobbin my heart out and now is not the first time to try) After yesterday where i posted to say my DD had only put on 2oz in 5 weeks and HV had sent me to GP..

Have been to GP who rechecked charts and she has gone from 50th centile to 2nd. She discussed my feelings on formula and early weaning and respected my views but basically told me that DD is nowhere near where she should be, that a plateau of weigt to that extent is not normal. She has advised that I feed her as normal at night but give her formula as well. I raised the issue that surely thats milk that DD will not then seek from me in the night.

Ive come away sobbing, everything ive read says feed feed feed. But I cant get DD to stay on, she feeds around 12 minutes each boob and i even revisit each one afterwards to ensure im emptied. She already feeds every 2 hours and pumping gives me nothing.

Ive read kellymom, ive called la leche, ive called the ABM. I even called my indie midwife. Everyone says feed her more, but I cant make her feed anymore than she is, she just turns away.

I feel like i cant afford to ignore the advice as I feel like ive starved my baby but my head says how can a breast milk substitite be the answer? Please please can someone advise me, im devastated that I dont seem to have done a good enough job.

OP posts:
ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 02/04/2009 20:00

DS didn't regain his birthweight until he was 4 weeks old. He wee'd, poo'd and was very alert. However it seemed he only took enough milk to satisfy and fuel him, and no more.

So to get him to put on weight, each day after a couple of feeds I used to express (so a higher % of hindmilk) and then straight away bottle feed him the ebm, whether it be 1/2 oz or 2 oz's. After about a week of doing this he started to put on weight. So, yes it was a faff, but it worked.

Have you done or has anyone suggested switch feeding? As soon as your lo looses interest in feeding you swap sides and the gush of the letdown regains their interest. You can swap sides as many times as necessary during each feed.

The above is my experience, so hopefully someone who is qualified will come along and help.

You WILL get through this. Good luck.

becaroo · 02/04/2009 20:01

Goodness me, you are amazing!!!! Feeding that often at 18 weeks!!! Crikey, you should get a medal!

You are right, though, how can you possibly feed more?

So, she has gained just over 3lbs since birth? Is that right?

If GP did not examine her and felt she was fine physically, what exactly is the problem other than poor weight gain? Sorry to sound dense, but with my ds1 he had other issues as well as poor weight gain (not meeting milestones, floppy, lethargic etc)

Bit unsure what it is they are telling you....have they refered her? Did they do a dip test for uti at least?

Sadly, babies cannot read the red book charts so do not know what centile they should be on!!!!

Oh dear, poor you. I really feel for you having been there myself...daft question coming up - was she weighed on the same scales at the same time of day??

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 02/04/2009 20:01

Oh, and after a week of the ebm top ups I stopped expressing and he done it all himself, so it may not be a long term thing.

Original poster
Tinkerisdead · 02/04/2009 20:02

Hi daisy

No I havent tried anything else other than the tea, to be honest I can always hear the milk whizzing down her throat. Since the tea ive been amazed at how well she was feeding so this has floored me that her weight is even slower.

the doctor didnt even discuss increasing supply or feeding more often. In a nutshell she said that she respected my opinions but that at this stage she would recommend formula. She claimed it wouldnt affect my supply as it was in addition to the normal feeds but surely filling her with formula could potentially stop her waking at 2am and so on for the next feed and then my supply would dwindle.

oh and daisy....your tea was skanky

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PlumBumMum · 02/04/2009 20:05

But the gush of letdown is foremilk which is not as calorific as hind milk so you are better to keep offering same breast, instead of her filling up on fore milk from each breast,
she could just get tired easy, and dosen't have to try hard for her feed because she getting fed so often

Original poster
Tinkerisdead · 02/04/2009 20:06

I think thats why im upset becaroo i cant see the problem really. The health professionals have planted one in my head. My DD has been amazing this last month and now its like panic stations about her weight.
Good tip move it about expressing straight after a feed although i do struggle to get anything on pumping. i will try that though.

OP posts:
becaroo · 02/04/2009 20:06

I am afraid that has been my experience with tops ups for my ds2 doctorswife....as soon as I introduced a top up he wanted that as it was so much easier for him to get his milk from the bottle instead of me Bf only lasted 6 weeks I am not a GP but I am pretty sure it would affect your supply eventually, particularly as you are feeding so often.

PlumBumMum · 02/04/2009 20:07

becaroo is right you do deserve a medal

becaroo · 02/04/2009 20:09

...I only ever managed 1oz of EBM (after 20 mins), even though the milk squirted out from the other boob when I fed him!!! (very messy!) Babies are far more efficient that a pump AFAIK.

LackaDAISYcal · 02/04/2009 20:09

apologises for the skanky tea

the way the centile charts work DW.....some babies have to be at the top or the bottom.

Have they said they are going to review things in a few weeks? or just given you the ultimatum to give formula? Have they said what would happen if she doesn't gain weight, even on formula?

sorry for all the questions.

becaroo · 02/04/2009 20:10

...I wish I had a medal....I could post it to you!!!

PlumBumMum · 02/04/2009 20:10

Thedocswife, I fed ds for 6 months and was absolutely crap at expressing, so don't be worrying about that, although with dd I did get an electric pump and tried to pump out at least an oz (took ages) at the end of every feed and then add them together

Original poster
Tinkerisdead · 02/04/2009 20:14

no the questions are good its helping me rationalise my thoughts as i just sat in surgery sobbing at the doctor and all the way home. Ive tried so hard to get this right and i feel like ive been neglegent.

GP wants me to go back in 3 weeks but that was on the understanding that i top her up with formula. Im so grateful for MN though as i was able to query her burning more calories, formula being less calorific but i think she was miffed at a debate with me. It was formula..the magic cure all.

OP posts:
popsycal · 02/04/2009 20:14

Doctors wife
I havenot read all of the thread but couldn't not answer

If your dd is showing all the signs eg wet/dirtty nappies, thriving, etc etc I really would trust your instincts

ds3 is almost 7 months. I would have no idea what he weighs. Really. I last had him weighed when he was 11 weeks and in hospial with bronchiolitis. Before that, he was 10 days old when the HV weighed him at her first visit. You keep feeding your girl and trust your instincts. You have not starved your baby.

LackaDAISYcal · 02/04/2009 20:14

Just another wee thing DW.

Have you seen this link from kellymom. It mentions possible thyroid problems. Have you any concerns re your thyroid at all? Or on any of the meds listed?

ILikeToMoveItMoveIt · 02/04/2009 20:14

PLUMBUMMUM - if you are switch feeding within one feed it doesn't mean a higher % of foremilk. They get the same amount of both types of milk as a normal feed, just more letdown gushes to keep their interest. Each swapping of sides doesn't start with foremilk! And if the DW is feeding as much as she is I would think there isn't much foremilk there.

popsycal · 02/04/2009 20:15

You know what - formula schmormula!

ook for Sparklygothkat's posts about her ds2 - he was premmie and they insisted theyat she top him up. She lied and didn't then they told her that, look, you were right to top him up

Will see if I can find you a link

Original poster
Tinkerisdead · 02/04/2009 20:16
OP posts:
popsycal · 02/04/2009 20:17

and step away from the pump. Breast pumps are like those mirrors at the fair ground. They can give a distorted view of what your supply is like

popsycal · 02/04/2009 20:18

how old is she and how heavy is she?

dd not your gp

treedelivery · 02/04/2009 20:19

Can anyone tell us why weight gain matters so much? In the company of a well thriving baby who is developing normally and perhaps gaining length?

Because really what would they do if you were ffing and in this scenario?

Horton · 02/04/2009 20:19

Doctorswife, are you thin? Is your partner thin? Were either of you a bit skinny as children? This is the age when my DD started to drop centiles like nobody's business (from straight along the 25th to way down at the bottom of the chart) and I had HVs threatening paediatricians etc like anything. I stopped talking to them after my v sensible GP told me to do what I thought best after he'd seen DD. She is FINE. She is now 2 and a half, eats like a horse and is skinny. I was also skinny as a child and was reduced on one occasion to screaming at HV 'Her father only weighs nine stone and he's a MAN!'. When I regained my senses a bit later and talked to my mum, I realised I'd never been on any of those centile lines between the ages of about four months until I was heavily pregnant.

I'd say if you do want to mix feed then give a bottle during the day as this will impact less on breastfeeding (I understand that hormones produced in night feeds help support milk supply but someone else may have better info).

And I was feeding just as often as you at this stage - be assured it does get less relentless, I promise.

Original poster
Tinkerisdead · 02/04/2009 20:20

"Beer has been recommended for decades as a galactogogue (agent to increase breastmilk supply). " woooaaaaahhhh and ive been drinking that curry tea??!!!! I coulda had beer!

I do switch after she has finished each boob as i was paranoid about foremilk hind milk imabalance and it does keep her interest.

Now thyroid issues...im bloody tired but then that could be the feeding at 2am onwards..my hair is falling out but i thought that was a post pregnancy thing.

OP posts:
odisco · 02/04/2009 20:24

Sounds like what was happening me about 2-3 weeks ago. For a start only get her weighed every 2 weeks. I'm with Plumbummum - try feeding only on one side per feed and then expressing - even if you get nothing. This will increase the hindmilk.

Also ignore the birthweight - even with the small weight gain is she gaining ALONG a centile or still crossing them? If still crossing then a Paediatrician review is probably sensible. Someone needs to examine her to be really reassuring.

Don't panic, doesn't sound that bad.

Original poster
Tinkerisdead · 02/04/2009 20:26

we're both thin (well i was before this baby) right gonnna try expressing then, even if i get nothing off i surely would be stimulating supply

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