tiktok, bfing gurus, bfers, interested parties of all creed and colour... heyulp! bfing a preemie baby... top tips please

[Aitch]

don't know where to start, really...

dd is two weeks old today (blimey) and put on her birthweight on wednesday so that's great. however of course she didn't start putting on weight until her formula top-ups, topping up with ebm didn't do the trick.

her weight gain today was only 30g (last few times has been double that or more) and i do put that down to the fact that i've been pumping more and therefore have been giving her more ebm top-ups than formula.

question is... what's the tipping point? she is gaining, i am producing more milk (not heaps, but volume-wise we are on target for the SCBU calculations). we were told to give dd 280mls per day in top-ups as well as bf, but with the formula it's been more like 350ml.

so do i accept the 'slow' weight gain and think of dd's longer-term benefits having protected my supply, or do i want her on formula but with more energy to feed, iyswim?

midwife has suggested one top-up of formula, and at the next topping-up with ebm, this seems like a reasonable compromise to me, but am i missing something.

i can't imagine it... we're not even in most of the tiny baby clothes yet, just next and mothercare so far. some of the 'tiny' babygros appear to be designed for giselle bunchen.

i totally know what you mean about the not looking, her head and face look fine and rather yummy to me but her wee body is too skinny for words. we've not bathed her yet, funnily enough, the paeds have scared me with their talk of temp control etc. i was goiing to give her a good wash today to wipe some of the sick off, just to make a good impression.

i will continue to experiment with clothing, there was NOTHING in H&M yesterday, just those vest things. i've tried to do a bit of top down but i can't manouevre my tit into dd's mouth (yes, i know, 'baby to breast not breast to baby') without having access to the entire magnificent expanse.

Aitch I can post you some bits if you like as my friend's baby has hit 10lb!! There are a couple of snowsuits that would be great for you.

Email me at rachel underscore summerscales at yahoo dot com if you want anything. It would be a pleasure to get rid of some stuff- they've clothed prem twins in Devon, back up here for the spring arrival and would love a trip further north.

Yes, I think the top-up-top-down method works better when you're more experienced and not using the "jigsaw" method of latching on

Saw these which are designed to wear underneath a wrap top or cardi of your own (no way could you wear them alone!!) Given that they look just like a vest with holes in, I wonder if it's easy to cobble one together out of an ordinary vest top.

This is something I earmarked as being useful before I had BabyDragon. Then I forgot about it!

you are NOT going to believe how we have fucked-up going to this appointment today.

OH NO!
What happened?

am all ready to go, taxi a no-show. phone driver, says he was there an hour ago, check clock and... the app was at .20 so somehow have lost an hour.
said to dh... he said, 'that's why i was asking if we'd be back in time to pick up dd from nursery. and why i was asking where the taxi was...'

not 'THAT'S WHY I WAS ASKING WHAT TIME THE APP WAS'. and he knew when it was... he'd written it on his calendar in the first place. so fed up being responsible for knowing every dammn thing in this family.

app at 3.20

Oh dear. life's like that though isn't it with newborns and no sleep and feeding and juggling older kids...

Will they reschedule you in quickly? Will it add to the stress of waiting and worrying or, hopefully, will it help you just get on with the business of building up your feeding confidence?

Atich i know i'm not a regulatrposter but I lurk lots if that counts. If you give me some measurements for yout little one I can knit/crochet up some cardis etc very quickly and easily. Have loads for yarn in too small a quanities for my now 6mnth old unless he has a joseph coat. It would be a pleasure a a small return for all the help om blw on your blog for the paranoid mums likemyself. email is my username @ googlemail

Oh, what a pain, Aitch. Hope they can reschedule soon - you won't have been the first to do this, and you won't be the last. You and dh must both be pretty tired and worn out - hope you have a good evening, and tomorrow is a better day.

Ha, I think your subconscious has spotted that you're doing fine and the appointment would just have been a waste of time

For, me, by far the easiest - not especially the most glamorous - outfit for public bf has been a cardigan over a stretchy top. You then unbutton the top buttons of the cardie, pull the top up, and voila. The baby can be sort of half under the hem of the top which makes it all a bit warmer/more discreet for the large of nork.

nah, i was just incompetent. i was staning there with my jacket on, dd in new car seat and everything. [twit]

so now hv is coming to weigh her today... she's an islander, full-on gaelic old-fashioned hcp... not pro-bfing, very 'it doesn't matter' etc. gah. why can't i read a clock?!

Well if DD2 has put on weight as we all suspect you can show her the bfing way then eh??

Do you want those clothes BTW? Cute snowsuits.....no room in loft....please have them!!

oh yes, sorry, i should have answered you and charitas. what do you think re the snowsuits? i have a tiny baby one and a newborn one, both of which fit in the sense that she is in them, albeit not to the extent that her hands are out (which i wouldn't necessarily want anyway). so in a way i wouldn't want to take them off you if they could go to someone who could get more use. however, if they're a better fit than the ones i have... bler bler bler, it's impossible to know, isn't it, the blooming sizes are so random. but yes, so long as you wouldn't mind if they basically replicated what we have here. i'll pass them on to someone deserving once i'm finished, or give them back obv. my friend works with a trafficked womens' charity, i tend to pass things on to them cos they really need it.

and charitas... how lovely, i do adore a bit of crochet, a wee cardie would be fab.

right. it's 2.11, up from 2.04 a week ago. hv not too chuffed, kept talking about ounces, saying she wanted to see more etc.

Aitch, have just seen your post, please go tell your HV to boil her head. 70g is not huge but it's a gain plus one week does not a pattern make. If your dd is feeding well and pooing then resist any felt pressure to top-up. If she has only made the transition to feeding by herself in the last week it is not surprising. Plus (sorry if pointing out the obvious and you already know this), has she been weighed naked and on a digital scale both times?

2.5oz in a week for a young prem exclusively breastfed is fantastic! Ignore the stupid woman! I would have been if Tink had managed as much as that. Well done you!

and she's had a cold...

Even better then just think what she would have gained if she hadn't.

but the paed said he wanted to see 20g per day... can't help but want to start topping up again. not that i'd cut them out entirely, but i had cut down to one ish a day.

I think gaining half of a baby's expected weight in a week with a cold is really good. You also need to remember that that weight could have been because she was due a feed or had just weed. When we went through that time with Tink not gaining for 4 weeks I fed her straight after a weigh-in once and when she finished the HV said to put her back on, she doesn't like doing it but she was interested in what would happen. She had gained 2oz, then she weed so HV reset the scale and she was back to the same weight.

Tell your daughter she's not allowed to wee for at least 6 hours before a weigh-in !

this is NOT what the hv said...

She's gaining, pooing, weeing, and thats with a cold. That is the important thing remember - and babies don't grow in straight lines, they grow in fits and spurts.

Don't let this woman get to you !