17 week old and baby rice

[pamelat]

Any opinions?

The health visitor has asked me to wait another week as she is still gaining weight well but she is cranky (and has been for 2 weeks or so), waking frequently at night, grabbing my toast (!) and crying when she cant have it.

I believe she is genuinely hungry, especially at night.

Health visitor said to put her in her own room instead as that could be why is waking so frequently but personally I would rather satisfy her hunger and have her near us?

I know that 17 weeks is meant to be the earliest you start it but what are the negatives for starting it at 17 weeks?

For me sleeping through meant the difference between functioning well and not, between PND and not, between having the energy to play with dd1 during the day or not. I feel its important. How can you function for any length of time on 3 hrs sleep and remain happy. I just couldn't, not through selfishness, through physical inability to cope without enough sleep.

I agree tori but some women feel they have to suffer to be 'natural' mothers.

For me, short term discomfort for me was far outweighed by the long view of what I was doing.

I'm not some sort of sleep-deprivation junkie, nor am I a martyr (ha, the very idea!) and I won't deny there weren't times when I didn't function very well at all. But it passed. And there's no guarantee early weaning will help them sleep better anyway - some babies are unsettled by it.

It's about different priorities - for me, I would be feeling very selfish and guilty now if I'd weaned early - it is but a blink of an eye in anyone's life, that couple of months extra.

I think its v fair to say that BF mums do tend to feed BM exclusivley for longer than a FF mum.Certainley that seems to be the aim of BF to lots of mums who choose to do so.Just an observation

The other thing regarding this is whether you have to go back to work. I did and was doing long days every day in an operating theatre. If I was tired and made a mistake during a procedure I would be in deep sh*t. Likewise when I started CM, if I was knackered and not paying attention then one of the kids could have an accident because I wasn't on form IYSWIM.

God, what a bitchy thing to say, Chocolatepeanut - I certainly don't feel I have to suffer to be a natural mother. What a peculiarly twisted viewpoint.

lol, chocpeanut.

I can't function on 3 hrs sleep either and have had pnd knocking on my door, early days, due to crap postnatal care, including bad bfing advice, like tori had.

once the bfing problems were worked though with help from people who knew about bfing, MN actually, my and dd's sleep improved. that plus I started to cosleep, even if just for naptimes at first. I also started to get better sleep and more sleep so the fug of pnd lifted. I suppose it all helped me to manage things better without sleep training or early weaning.

Yes, I went back to work as well - long days, unsociable hours. Not in an operating theatre, but if I make mistakes, my company can face mahoosive fines from the industry regulator.

That was night time sleep of 3 hrs. I unfortunately could never relax enough to sleep when she slept, so whether she slept for 12hrs during the day is immaterial. I now can't sleep during the day because dd2 hardly sleeps in the day and dd1 sleeps all afternoon Lucky she sleeps at night except for feeding.

it may very well be true, starlight. i think it is true that by and large women who ff are of a lower socio-economic and educational status than those who bf, and it's certainly true that HVs aren't given to advising 6 mos across the board, so perhaps they wean earlier because they listen to their HCPs more? who knows?
as a ffer myself i find it weird if it is true because the length of time it takes babies to digest formula rather than bm does tend to help them sleep for longer bursts of time anyway, so i'm not sure why the rush?

DS2 IS 4 weeks old.
He goes to bed at 9pm(ish) sleeps til 1am, unless I do a dreamfeed when I go to bed at 11pm (ish), wakes at 4am sleeps til 8am, so I get a total of about 7 hours sleep, just interrupted.

I can function pretty well on that tbh.

I am sorry to come across as bitchy but tbh some bf mums come across as so holier than thou.Its like that nipple comes out and lo and behold anyone can suggest anything other withouut being preached to.

The op is clearly struggling and I think she should be given options so she can make a choice

As for PND, I had that with DD, she was in SCBU, I got plenty of sleep, never been happier with the boys, no sleep, no PND.
You can't possibly balme PND on sleep, anymore than you can claim your early weaned child has not and wil not ever suffer from it.

It's as ridiculous as the 'never did me any harm' argument. Well, I used to smoke heroin and take goodness knows how many ecstasy tablets a night but it never did me any ahrm so must be fine

ChocP, was it a necessary comment on this thread though?

I could make wild and sweeping allegations about a chunk of mothers I don't know at all on this thread, if you like? Pointless and rude, though, eh?

Or were you perhaps aiming it at someone on the thread?

BF mums would urge people asking for advice not to wean as they tend to wean later,thats my point.

chocolate peanut, that's not the case at all. It's about doing what you feel is right for your child, based on the information you have to hand, and not wanting to cause your child to suffer at the expense of an easier life of the parent.

To suggest that women are 'suffering' because they arent jamming a bottle in a baby's mouth in order to bloat out their baby, or are happy to meet their baby's needs at all times of day, is unfounded and ridiculous.

CHOCOLATEPEANUT, I agree, completey, she should have a choice, as should we all, but surely she should be given all the facts to make her choice rather than some random experience that could easily be put down to luck?

i do think holier-than-thou is very often in the eye of the thou, tbh.

Maybe because "they" read the research and understand it better, CP?

Ooh, look, I've just done it - a rude and sweeping generalisation that I neither mean nor believe.

Yes, I would urge people to wait to wean their babies for the frankly excellent reasons I've already given