17 week old and baby rice

[pamelat]

Any opinions?

The health visitor has asked me to wait another week as she is still gaining weight well but she is cranky (and has been for 2 weeks or so), waking frequently at night, grabbing my toast (!) and crying when she cant have it.

I believe she is genuinely hungry, especially at night.

Health visitor said to put her in her own room instead as that could be why is waking so frequently but personally I would rather satisfy her hunger and have her near us?

I know that 17 weeks is meant to be the earliest you start it but what are the negatives for starting it at 17 weeks?

The thing with 17 weeks is that some babies will be physcailly ready (As in their gut is able to take solids with no problems) at 17 weeks, all babies will be ready by 26 weeks.
So the guidelines say to go for 26 weeks as then you can be sure your baby is ready for food, you cannot see inside their gut, so cannot be sure they are ready at 17weeks, it's just possible they might be.
HTH

I weaned DS1 at 4 months as per the advice 6 years ago. Having just weaned DD2 at 6 months I feel that with hindsight, it seems far more natural to do so at 6 months. 4 months seems too young with hindsight and experience.

I agree that babies aren't born with a knowledge of day and night, however, from my experience they can be taught the difference. With both my dd's I started to put them in the bedroom at 7pmish to sleep around 6-7wks. Both took a week to realise that it was sleep time when they got into their sleeping bags and went in their moses basket in a dark room, following their bath. With dd2 who is 7wks she never slept during the evenings downstairs but after a week of being put upstairs in the evenings she now doesn't stir until she needs a feed at about 130am. I doubt this would have just occurred without persuasion

Thank you all (again).

I guess its hard when you have the "comparing" thing going on. Of the 16 mums in my antenatal group (babies are all within 2 weeks of being the same age) there is only mine and 1 other that is not sleeping from 1030pm until 7am (or 7pm to 7am in a couple of cases!) and a lot of the mums around me have sworn that its because of solids, or the own room idea.

I obviously don't want to put my baby at any risk (my cousin was a victim of cot death years ago, when guidance was very difference and risks far greater, so I am quite conscious of all the current advice). The health visitor seemed to think that 4 months would be fine, I suppose the advantage she has is in "knowing" my daughter. Its very confusing to have such conflicting advice, especially when I am tired and it comes from a so called expert (and my husband is more than keen).

I am going to wait a week or so and see whether her eating or sleeping improves, if not then I will re consider early weaning once more (at least she will be a few weeks older, I will be about a decade older!). I dont think its "natural" for her to be so hungry, but like a lot of you say, it could be a prolonged growth spurt.

No one ever said mother hood was easy! I just wish that the experts could be consistent in their advice, that would help

Are you on one of the Post Natal Groups on here? Perhaps drop a post on the relevant one and find out where their babies are at? You'll get a different perspective than your RL AN group I'm sure.

You sound like you're pretty sensible, and that whatever you do will be considered and well thought out.

Good luck

pamela - I'm sure not everyone's baby is sleeping through the night everyone classes sleeping through as something different IYSWIM.

My DD2 had solids at 6 months, at 8 months she was on 3 good meals a day plus a few snacks plus BFs, she still woke in the night, solids did nothing to her sleeping.

If you don't feel ready to move her into your room then don't, I personally feel young babies should sleep in the same room as their parents.

The trouble with late weaning is that by then bf babies who have fed on demand and have always had night feeds get into the habit of night feeds rather than actually still needing them.

Trust me. Everyone else's babies are not sleeping through. They are telling you porky pies!

Also agree with welliemum that we must get away from this idea that babies are meant to sleep through. Instead of expecing babies to sleep through, we should expect husbands and partners to help out more at night. I know I know...easier said than done!

have to disagree with that tori, sorry!
maybe some babies suckle for comfort without feeding at night, I don't know, but I know my dd takes a vg feed, and as a slow weight gainer she certainly needs it

I hate to hammer the point - but the experts are consistent in their advice. Anyone who pays attention to the World Health Organization guidelines will know that babies should not have solid food before 6 months. The majority of babies who are weaned earlier than this will be fine - but some won't. And there is no way of knowing which category your baby falls into. Interest in your meals, more frequent feeds, unsettled sleep are symptoms of being a bay - they are NOT symptoms of needing solid food. They might be symptoms of needing more milk, though.

And people lie like troupers about babies sleeping habits. We have somehow arrived at a situation where having a baby that sleeps through makes you a "good mother" and your baby a "good baby". So people boost their won confidence by being economical with the truth - or interpreting 4 hours as sleeping through. This is only a tiny fraction of your life. It will get better, but at the moment accept that you are looking after a baby and that is a full time demanding job. Sleep when she sleeps, let everything else go, accept all the help you are offered, take her into bed with you - do anything that provides the greatest sleep for the greatest number of people. And appreciate her as a baby. Before you know it she'll eb a lumpen teenager and you wont be able to get her out of bed in the morning for love nor money.
And don't run even the slightest risk with her future health by giving her solids. They won't help her sleeping, I promise. Time will do that.

super post seeker

seeker, I don't think the majority of mothers lie about sleep. For me sleeping through is not about being a good mother, or expectations from other people, its about me liking sleep myself and not wanting my baby to end up being a four year old with poor sleep habits. I am also not lying about the age at which my dd1 slept from 2230-7am consistently without waking for anything- 8wks. By 12 weeks it was 7-7. She may have woken because all children wake, but over time leart to put herself back to sleep so quickly that she didn't murmur.
After a week of doing the bedtime routine with dd2 (7wks) she has tonight gone to sleep, without being rocked, cuddled, fed to sleep- she had all of these before going into her basket awake. I said night night, go to sleep sweety and left the room, she didn't murmur and went to sleep without help. Once she has practiced this, she will go back to sleep if she wakes and isn't hungry/wanting comfort.

Yes eventually time will do it, however, I have no intention of spending several years getting up 3/4/5 times per night because my dcs failed to learn how to settle themselves off to sleep when they were young. I also have no intention of spending every night doing the rocking thing/ patting/feeding to sleep.

Tori, I wish you'd had my DS2...

Not because I think you'd have fixed him - more because he'd have made you rethink quick smart!

Tori - I don't feed "on demand", I feed "on cue" and I don't feel that giving a tiny baby food or comfort in the night is a bad thing.

fwiw my dd will now self settle without feeding/patting etc, not all the time but most naps and most bedtimes

but when she wakes, she's hungry!

The trouble is that if you pick a baby up the minute it starts to snuffle because you think its hungry, if he/she isn't hungry but has just come into light sleep, you disturb them for no real reason iyswim. Obviously if the baby is upset/crying and obviously needs comfort/feeding then yes do it. I just think that with new style parenting babies are not given the chance to learn to get themselves back to sleep. We all seem to feel they have to be rocked/petted/dummy etc, etc. My dd2 was in her cot with eyes wide open but knackered- not slept from 1130-1830hrs, no dummy in as she spat it out before hand. Went to sleep- routine and practice.

PS no crying either. I soothed before hand with the dummy and rubbing tummy, just not until she went to sleep.

Never picked a baby up at the first snuffle. Ever. DS1 would've slept through far earlier than he did, were it not for the fact that every time he cut a tooth, his temperature rocketed to 41 degrees, so from 6-19m, his sleep was disturbed for a few nights every few weeks.

DS2 - well, DS2 just doesn't need sleep. He is made of boing.

hunker, emailed you.

Seeker what an absolutely fantastic post. Read it out to DP and he thought it was well; worded and spot on .

Also am excl bfeeding and co-sleeping here and it varies wether he sleeps 2 hours or 8 hours. Am not going to stress out about it though as in time he will sleep. I also have an 8 year old and what seeker says is true. Time flies by so fast, theyare only small for a short while.

Sorry tori - but have to disagree as did pretty much the same with ds1 as i am with ds2 and ds1 sleeps fine and self settles.

Ds2 is now 20 weeks and still not on solids yet although i do admit that he has grabbed bits of my plate and had lots of funb playing, sucking it. LIke banana for example, but he hasnt really digested any solids yet.

I have just put my 4 week old DS to bed, wide awake, no tears, settles himself quite happily, but I'll still be getting up a few times in the night with him, not because of every snuffle, or because he ahsn't learnt to settle himself but because he is HUNGRY FOR MILK.

It's what babies do, I think someone once said it was to do with the size of his stomach? Who knows

oh and i dont pick up ds2 at first snuffle but i do 'read' him well and i dont leave him till he is crying either. This 'new style parenting' isnt all that new as did very similar with ds1 and he is a happy content boy. I think every baby is different and you cxant force them to all follow a fixed routine as they have differing and at times complex needs.