Childminder demands I stop breastfeeding

[Acr07]

Hi, I'm after a bit of advice. I've been sending my daughter to the childminders since she was a year old. The childminder happens to be her auntie as well. I've breastfed since birth and she in now 3.5 years old. Yes I know she's probably too old but she only has it at night before bed. Doesn't demand it at the childminders or anything. But today, she has said I NEED to stop as they're trying to teach her how to be more grown up and they associate BF with being a baby. Surely it's our choice when she's ready to stop, and nobody else's business of it isn't affecting her day to day? I've said that she will stop in hwr own time, but she keeps saying it needs to be now. She is my partner SIL and even though I've said something, she doesn't listen. Can she demand I stop?

To be honest I think you need to grow up. You're the problem here. Making something creepy of something natural.

Why would a lack of baby groups mean 2 year olds have baby bottles?

Now you're just being daft. Clearly my first reply was to the first part of your post about delayed development

I was a c/ minder for 10 years .

My initial thought was tell her to fuck off … however no the sake of family harmony I would tell her she is overstepping and it is a decision for you and Dd.

Wow.

I bet you're one of those who thinks women shouldn't breastfeed in public too aren't you?

I don’t understand how bf your dc at bedtime is affecting her at nursery? What am I missing?
I bf my dd for a very long time and she’s fine!

She cannot demand that you stop breastfeeding but I guess she can decide she no longer wants to be your childminder? Have you asked her to give you some specific examples of her concerns about your child's development if she feels that the breastfeeding is holding up her developing age appropriate skills?

My DS was 3 and a half - and still feeding - on his first day at a new nursery - as I collected him - he honed in on boobs and asked for milks.. the worker looked at me with a 'knowing looked' and said .. ''Children who are breastfed for too long are often developmentally delayed'' (or something to that effect).. she genuinely believed he was not talking at nursery down to me babying him.

I was quite shocked by this - I knew I was feeding late -I basically told DS not to ask for milk at nursery, but to wait till he got home. I really rated the nursery (it was a great place.. and really didn't expect these views.. )

About 2 weeks later - once DS had 'sussed out nursery'.. the worker came and apologised to me. Turned out he was not as developmentally delayed as she had first thought!!

He is currently in secondary school - and in the top 5% of his year. He is super bright.. He fed till he was nearly 5 (I drew a line at going to school, as I didn't want negative words said then). Honestly feed your LO the time is quick and the idea it makes them a baby is ridiculous!

Of course she can't, she getting to big for her boots, I was a CM and if it was affecting her in the setting, crying, acting babyish and not developing, I could understand.
I think the problem is that Ofsted push us so much into making sure they reach milestones and are not developmentally delayed and we promote independence, it's hard to know what lines to cross and what not to.

I also think the fact she is the child's aunt is making her too involved

I got chatting to a few friends mums at a baby shower recently. They all breastfed their children between 3 years and 6 years of age. At that time it was encouraged to start babies on formula by 6 months so they kept it to themselves/their husbands.

Remind the aunt that she's being paid to care for your child but that you are the parent so you make the decisions.

There's a great book out next month for children who breastfeed beyond infancy. When we're ready.

If you won’t fire her, at least be firm that the matter is not open for discussion. She is massively overstepping.