So is it just me who has viscerally negative reactions to talk about breastfeeding 4 or 5 year olds

[TwigorTreat]

Now look I know its different strokes for different folks and I am not judging anyone as I know logically that its fine and anyone who does is doing what they deem their very best for their own children.

But I am talking about a experiencing a sense of distaste that I cannot help. I do have a negative and almost physical reaction to the thought of breastfeeding my 3 year old let alone an older child. And I have discussed this before when it came to extending breastfeeding for my own child beyond 6 months and with the discussion was capable of making it past that psychological barrier to 11 months.

Perhaps the thought of having a reasonable discussion over this particular reaction is just a step too far for us on Mumsnet. But I thought I'd give it a go anyway .. what, with it being Saturday and all that.

Anyone who experiences the same sense of negativity will no doubt need to gulp down hard before adding to this discussion. Just as anyone who is on the 'other side of the fence' will need to take copious amounts of oxygen into their system to calm down before posting .. I hope both sides do though... it could be interesting and educational

Tori - I really am struggling to see why you are determined to find an argument "against" b/feeding. If you dont want to do it - then of course that is fine. But that's your hang up, and not something that people who continue to b/feed should have to deal with, quite frankly.

I think it's incredibly sad that you are dredging the bottom of the barrel in such a manner as to give your hang up some weight in it's presence.

Correct, toddler....periods beginning at age 12-13 is a very modern phenomenon, and while tori's argument is confused, and confusingly written, I took her to mean that today we would be advocating pregnancy at 12-13 ie at the start of fertilty.

jeremey - "it was a leap for you to think that I was uncomfortable with the thought of sensual pleasure in mother/baby contact."
sorry if you thought that is what I was saying, I was maing a more general point about what the "ew it's pervy brigade" might think (and clarifying my own views FTAOD) not directed at you.
you aren't in the pervy brigade I don't think

"Also, nature meant us to bf until the next child arrived, which would be annually in the days before contraception and TV! Once the newest arrival began feeding the older child had to fend for it self"

really? what evidence do you have for that? it is perfectly possible for women to tandem feed, and women in many cultures do it.

and anyway, what has that to do with anything at all? because we used to do it that way (which I doubt), then we always should?

"We can't argue animal behaviour on one subject and not in another."

Well I don't think we are arguing "animal" behaviour, whatever that might mean. we are arguing that there is nothing unnatural about it and that we want to do it and our children want to do it and actually there is no reason not to do it.

and anyway, I think it is perfectly legitimate to say this type of behviour as practised by our ancestors is positive and good for development but on the other hand this type of bahviour (say, cuffing) is negative and we shouldn't emulate it.

I can't really see any logic in the argument that we must adopt all or nothing the behviour of our ancestors (even presuming we know what that is - which we don't). that seems over simplistic and wihtout foundation.

except other people's bigotted reactions.

In cultures that do demand feed toddlers it's actually very unusual to have babies annually. Actually even in our developed world I have a friend who completely demand feeds and lets her toddlers self-wean who has spaced them out this way (something like every 3.5 years for her) with no contraception (she's only had a handful of periods in the last decade).

Interestingly, chimps, who share about 99% of our DNA, continue to nurse their babies until they're 6.

I have days when I wish I was BF-ing my almost 3 yr old. I don't find it strange at all, i find it lovely. Doing it public in the UK, though, and you're asking for trouble (sadly).

My dd 2.3 has just started again after a 4 month gap - and I think I still have milk. Amazing.
If it weren't for the fact that I've got used to sleep - never managed to shift the wake/bf connection iyswim - I would be really considering starting again . I think it's lovely too. As it is, we're just doing a symbolic 10 secs on each.

Exactly 6 years old nappy?

Agree with nappy's sentiment, but isn't the 99% thing a red herring? We share 95% of our DNA with mice, I think

and mice bf till...?

Oh got it, it's 3-4 weeks! all so simple for mice.

I think the DNA thing is a red herring, yes.
but the needs of our children are not that different from our primate cousins, imo

Dont belittle the poor mice that suffer

[hgrin]

I share 100% of my DNA with one very bad mouse

doesn't that mean you are actually a .. mouse? Hunker? How do you negociate the keyboard? and the Kamillosan?

She must have a squeak recognition system

mice have very nimble feet. I think she dances her posts out.

I have whisker-recognition software

Message withdrawn

that's very interesting lisa

lisa, v interesting. Is bf (both baby and toddler) public, out of interest?
and lol at 'learning to be sweet' - mine have never learned.