Daily Mail -"My beautiful baby was starving to death, until I defied the 'breast is best' bullies"

[theUrbanDryad]

i'm not sure what to think here...on the one hand it raises very valid points, but the headline is so inflammatory....

what do you think?

I was discharged 2 days after my caesar, the nurses at E. Surrey, health visitors, midwives were fantastic.

nurse helped me express a feed for my boy because I was having trouble latching him on which is when I learned that 30ml is a massive amount for a day old baby (!)so no problem with supply. They also helped me get the hang of latching him on, though manhandling my nipples to the shape of a baby's mouth was a new experience to me.

nose to nipple was my mantra for the first days till we got the hang of it. it was always my choice ,I wanted to breastfeed, knew I was producing enough milk because I was shown how to use their breast pump, but knew that if I ended up feeding my baby formula it wouldn't be the end of the world.

This is a strong minded woman writing a sensationalist article. we know we have a choice.

Glad to be hearing antoher point of view - it is almost impossible to see or hear such stories.... i know mums they were just bottle feeding their babies at home as they were ashamed of doing so....

I must admit I did spend some time trying to work out the logistics of nipple, tiny drops of colostrum, even tinier syringe...

I would mention that to someone, Snaf, because if they're recommending a weeny syringe to hand-express into...

Am seeing her tomorrow so will check what exactly she meant, hunker.

We were talking about 'amounts you'd expect to get' at the time so it's quite possible that I'm just confused and having essay-deadline-induced brain-freeze

blinkin Daily Mail, god I hate it. Fair enough if that was her experience but do they really need to put it like that. MIL will have a field day.

My story is very similar to this one of being re-admitted etc for weight loss- where for me I think breast feeding went wrong (I did have a tiny DS 5lb 9 at birth) wasn't so much in the preperation (went to classes prior to birth), latching on was fine etc but I just didn't realise that a baby should almost be feeding continuosly in the early days - I thought his crying must be for other things. I feel a bit crap about it now - but the support wasn't there and I don't think I was helped to be mentally prepared for what was in store. I guess if you were told how hard it can be they would put people of - personally if I'd been more mentally prepared I think I would have coped better. I think the tone of the article is sad though I would support anyones right to make the best choice for them and the baby.

I haven't encountered any of these breastfeeding bullies either and was advised to 'top up' when I rang the post natal ward on day 4 with the surprising news that my baby was crying constantly and seemed hungry.

I too was unprepared for the almost constant feeding you have to do at the beginning and then at other points along the way.

Now he's 6 months old and still being exclusively bf, the comments from health professionals are positive, but in a surprised way.
I totally disagree with the whole tone of the article and yes, I'm surprised at the absence of the 'nazi' phrase.

I have met a breastfeeding nazi. She is a midwife at our local maternity unit. I go there to demonstrate breastfeeding to the antenatal groups (mainly because when we had ours I complained that it was unrealistic to show breastfeeding with a knitted wollen tit ).

After I explained that breastfeeding was hard work but rewarding and answered questions, she went into a tirade of 'no-one here is thinking of using artificial formula are they?'; 'one bottle is likely to cause allergies in a baby'; 'there is no downside to breastfeeding' and so on. She was fairly full on about this and the entire class looked terrified.

Until I (quite diplomatically for me) intervened and said: 'actually breastfeeding is really great, but as I said it can be really hard work at the start, there will be times when you want to quit and at those times it's really important to remember that everyone, including your health visitor, is there to help you and that no-one is going to judge you for having problems'.

So they do exist. This 'angel' also used the phrase 'labour is not painful, it's just pressure and a bit tiring' at which I snorted with laughter I'm afraid.

I haven't read the thread, but please PLEASE could we all refrain from using the term Nazi in this context? It really is not appropriate IMHO.

She sounds demented. Did the midwife really think she had stabbed her baby?Perhaps she thought it was blood, but did she really think it was from from stabbing?

this is yet another of those "poor me" i was done in by those bitch fascist/nazi sorts (i agree these are vile terms to use about people who support bf)

i think it shows yet again the underlying problem that many women seem to think they are being pushed into bf. the rubbish for example that the so-called bf expert "to the stars" is quoted in the article as saying, that UNICEF/WHO bf drive is aimed at the 3rd world not the 1st world.

nonesense. many so-called 3rd world countries have a far BETTER bf record than we do in the UK and other industrailsed nations such as US and Japan, so she is talking utter crap because it is the industrailised world that has lost the art of bf and needs proper health support for rates to increase

it is true that there is a lot of rubbish or non-existent support out there for bf, but she is barking up the wrong tree by blaming it on people who are passionate about bf, even indirectly blaming the major world health orgs. whose main task is to reduce infant mortality, and bf is a major component of that initiative

i read a lot of these sorts of articles, it is obvious what their aim is

I think if they only told women that in the first few days, you usually have to breastfeed around the clock, breastfeeding would come as less of a shock.

Hunker and Snay - you can express and 'sook' the bubble of colostrum straight into the syringe instead os aiming into the top end of a wider one IYSWIM? For mums with little cinfidence, seeing a syringe at least half full is quite good for them. 0.5ml colostrum is enough for most babies!

Personally I use a 2 ml syringe

it's a shame the second part, which was more interesting, was sooooo far down after all that load of rubbish in the first part.

am I the only one then who is surrounded by ff supporters going 'oh go on, give him a bottle', 'let me feed her', 'you need to top up at night' etc? I never understood this pressure to bf thing, seemed more the other way round to me.

Not read this whole thread but have to say that I found that whilst I thought that the emphasis on bf was a bit heavy handed when I was pg, I was amazed at how MUCH help there was with bf once my ds was born. Maybe this is because I live in Manchester so there are more resources (?) but when I needed help (and I really did!) it was only a phone call away - I rang a bf counsellor from the NCT and by that afternoon it was problem solved. There is also a Baby Cafe group nearby which helped some people I know. I have no problem with people choosing to ff instead, and obviously there are some cases where this is the only option, but find it v surprising that people change to ff because of lack of support with bf - just not my experience.

it is interesting that she was discharged so soon after an emergency section with her first. With no1 and 2 I was kept in for five days. Even though with dd1 - I did not go home with a babe - she was in ICu and then SCBU for a number of weeks and I would be reporting for my postnatal care to the hospital - they would not discharge me no matter how much I wanted to go home. THis time - no3 I went home after 2 days BUT feeding was established etc and they were happy that I knew how to care for myself post surgery.

I agree with mears - total lack of support and assistance.

2ml it is then, mears

I think it's sad that women often want to discharge themselves asap because of the lack of support (in all areas) while in hospital.

I thought I'd want to stay as long as possible since I knew nothing about babies and thought it would be really important for establishing bf. The reality was that I was getting no sleep, no-one really showing me how to take care of the baby, and enthusiastic but inconsistant bf support. At least at home dh could help with changing nappies, soothing etc. We were advised to stay until bf was established but this was by self-reporting "success" and quite frankly, how did I know? I left after 3 days and the next day my milk came in and the bf went pearshaped! Luckily I had excellent community support and was referred back to the hospital for help.

It all comes down to lack of staff...

"Like 76 per cent of mothers in the UK, I had chosen to breast-feed"

This is a prime example of the problem with our health care system. I don't believe that 76% of mothers breastfeed ~ that's how many maybe try it in hospital (if you're lucky), but that's not the number doing it at the end of the week, or a month, or the recommended minimum of 6 months. I know of a few friends who didn't bf, but their notes say that they did!! And why, so that the health authorities don't look rubbish on the stats. And that's not good for anyone!!

Fair, well-balanced, thought-provoking article, sadly let down by the headline.

My baby suffered dehydration in hospital depsite coniuned pleas for help with breastfeeding. I was denied a breastpump and left to hand express tiny amounts into a thimble which was fed by a syringe for almost three days. It was hellish and only had a happy ending because the MW who came to help when I was sobbing in the corner of the room knew what to do. AND she gave him formula via a cup and that formula brought him back to life before our eyes. It took a nother day and a half of STRUCTURED help and we cracked it and went home, but the memories of feeling so desperate, anxious and useless are still there today. Given what she had to go through, far worse than my experience, I think her conclusions are totally valid.

I breastfed my son for two years. Am a total BF advocate and am a Surestart Breast Feeding Peer Supporter.

I think breastfeeding is wonderful, but it should always be the WOMANS CHOICE and pregnant women should be educated on the potential problems of BF in pregnancy, not just the benefits. Forwarned is forarmed and maybe if the BF promoters were more balanced in the information they give, woemn wouldn't be so shocked and feel like such failures when they have problems.

Mothers need information, support and pracitcal, consistant, structured help when they encounter problems and reciving that is a total lottery in my view. They should always be reasured that babies thrive on love more than anything else. That wont make potential breastfeeders abanded their efforts for formula. It will give them the perspective and space that they need.

I would be honoured to give my support and help to anyone who wants to BF but at the same time, women being bullied into making choices about feeding that they dont want to make, let alone to the extent of the mother in the article - it should not happen. It is heartbreaking and so unnecessary.

When I had DD, she was not immediately put to my breast. After she was weighed etc, I held her for a bit but I was so delerious from the G&A that I didn't think to put her on straight away. Within minutes, a MW came in and said that someone would be with me in a few mins to stitch me up so my sister held DD. Someone kept popping their head around the door to say that they wouldn't be long... I waited an hour and a half in the end while my sister held DD, who was sleeping. Once stitched, I was told to have a bath then they would be taking me to the ward. When I was taken to the ward I finally got a spare minute to try to breastfeed DD and she did so for 20mins before falling asleep.
Whenever she cried that night, a MW would rush in, put DD in my arms, put her mouth on the breast and then disappear. Which is when DD promptly took her mouth off...
I actually remember BFing her lying down and falling asleep. I woke 8hrs later with her next to me on the bed! Why didn't a MW spot this and wake me - I could have rolled onto her or she could have fallen off the bed!
Anyway, DD wasn't BFing by the time we were discharged and so wasn't doing it at home either. I was struggling and the MW just kept saying "Keep trying, it'll work out." Three days later we were admitted to the hospital again, as DD had lost a lot of weight (around 15%) and I couldn't rouse her. It was really scary - she was just like a ragdoll
After waiting 3 hours to be seen, a MW tried to get DD to latch on and, after several attempts, advised the bottle.
I did express milk after that, but only for a short while, since DD hadn't done much BFing, I didn't have much milk coming in. I'm glad that she got the first bit though (can't remember what it's called)
My MW would regularly visit me to tell me to BF but it just wasn't going to happen after the bad start we had. In the end, I burst into tears and told her that I didn't want to do it. She said "Oh, I didn't realise. You should have told me."

Woah, that's a lot longer than I thought it would be!
Sorry!

Babes survieve and thrive on formula. It's not the end of the world and a dreadful failure if you don't BF.ot only was my DS bottlefed but so was I and my brother, and we are both over 40 and not dead, obese, diabeticor noticeably wierd. Well apart from being healthily wierd...