Another article about how awful breastfeeding is, this time in a feminist publication

[Caligula]

I thought some of you would like to read this.

This misinformation bugged me:

"Times change though, and the formulas on the market are hopefully as close to what comes out of your boob, as they will ever be".

Wonder what the rest of you think

the new breastfeeding taboo

There you are... the 'breastfeeding mafia' don't even know they're doing it! They think they're 'educating' you.

They're just common or garden arseholes

I would have smacked their monkeychops!

I bf my 2 and it still makes me stroppy that people behave like that.

If it's any consolation kamikayzed, I got some filthy looks from three women when I was bfing my daughter very discretely under my coat in a cafe the other day. And from the other side of the room a woman actually got her husband and teenage son to turn around and look at me. They didn't say anything, but what on earth was their problem? There was nothing to see (if that was their problem), just a baby's head. Maybe she had sick in her hair or something. So you can't win either way.

Nice thing happened to me once though when dd was tiny. I was bf in a horrible room above the shopping centre when a mother and toddler came in. The little girl said 'what's that lady doing?' and the mum said 'she's giving the baby some milk'. The little girl said 'is it coming out of her tummy?' and the mum started to get embarassed and laugh, then the little girl said 'I know where it's coming from - her boobies!' Cute.

Gad. YOU win, MissM, because you are giving your child the very best food it's possible to give her. that, i assume, gives you comfort when you are stared at.

those of us who struggled and ultimately 'failed' to BF can sit in the privacy of our own homes, with no-one else around to make a comment and still 'lose' because the indisputable fact is that we are feeding our children an inferior product. so try taking that feeling outside and getting people talking loudly about bfing. you want to die inside. (same thing happened to me, kami, but i'd forgotten because it was so awful i'd actually Blocked It Out).

so the two examples are not equivalent, really they are not. [baffled as to why this is tricky to undertand]

I think it must be very unusual though. I agree with you Aitch that the two situations aren't equal, but I also think that the FF situation is far less common. I have never ever heard an adverse remark about FF in public, or a stare or raised eyebrow, whereas with BF it really is par for the course. To the extent that you really do have to steel yourself to go out sometimes, but if you need to buy food, you need to buy food...I suspect that although FF'ers may feel worse about it when it happens, it probably happens far less frequently.

do you know what? i think that it must depend on the area where you live... i definitely live in the type of place where it's all meeja types, academics, educated ladies and fellers etc and the overwhelming majority either bf or have tried and failed to bf. in my (rather expansive, if i say so myself) circle of friends i just don't know a single person who bottlefed from birth. not one.

otoh, i was the only person bfing on the ward where i gave birth, because the hosp's catchment area is fairly deprived. so i can imagine people having the opposite experience to mine, but it does not invalidate what i experienced. and being perfectly honest, we all saw the MN poll results so we know roughly that on this site we are in the majority a bunch of braying middle class fools (more or less), so why do we debate bfing as if it's something that is constantly under attack? it's just not my experience, tbh. it's not as normalised as it should be, far from it, and there is lots to be done, but in terms of the hearts and minds of MNers, well, you're already there.

hahaha, just read that back, d'you think i could have qualified my MN is middle-class statement any more? or do you think that four times was enough?

But as you say, MN isn't representative of the real world. In the RW, breastfeeding is constantly under attack. I don't think it would be very useful to have a debate about it (or anything else for that matter) as if the world consists of mumsnetters. (God the very thought of it. )

true, but these drawing of equivalencies of suffering do get on my (useless) tits. I suffered MORE fgs!!! and you beetches with your cracked nips and bfed children better remember that next time.

yeah, kami, it REALLY isn't my experience either. and it's not like i live in chelsea either. i'd love to be bfing a one-year-old and for someone to have a go at me about it... i'd bloody relish the opportunity to have a square go at them. (i'd put down the child first, though, probably.)

I fed my DD for 14 months in Australia, and am currently feeding ds (10 m) in the uk, and i definately get more hostile looks and stares and 'tut tuts' here. Actually I got none in Australia. Here I find myself feeding in yucky little room that I would never have dreamed of feeding in, but its sometimes better than being glared at. Of course not everyine is awful though, some people ar elovely and helpful etc.

This acticle annoyed me because she wrote as if she had uncovered some new piece of information - that nobody likes breastfeeding - and also the implication that theres no real benefit to it, its just purely a matter of personal preference.

Of course I respect the right of all mothers to chose the feeding method that is best for them and their situation (and would never glare at or make any comment to a FFeeding mum...infact I always smile at all B or F feeding babies, cause they always look adorable), but that doesn't change the fact that the acticle is fairly crappy.

I vividly remember when dd1 wasn't putting on weight at first (poor latch) and being told to take dietary supplements "to improve the quality of the milk".

As it happens, I knew this was nonsense, but I hated the comment because of the implication that my milk wasn't good enough.

I was also bullied (no other word for it) into giving dd1 some formula top-ups and I resent that in the same way. (As well as the fact that she immediately developed eczema and is still allergic to cows' milk to this day).

What dd1 needed - and in the end got, and thrived on - was not better milk: just more of mine.

If I'd been just a little less well-supported and well-informed, those bits of seemingly innocent, yet savagely undermining advice would have brought me to despair.

There would be no sense in comparing that experience to the feelings of someone who is unwillingly ff. The point I'm (very longwindedly) making is that feeding your baby is hugely personal and hugely emotive.

It is just so easy for other people's comments to hurt you in the early days. It shouldn't be, but it is. Even a well-intentioned comment will feel like an attack.

so true, welliemum.

Yes I agree too Welliemum. Breastfeeding is often subtly, and not so subtly undermined by the same health profs who say breast is best. When I took dd1 for her 9 months check, I was asked what sort of milk she was on. On saying breastmilk only, I was immediately told to give her vitamin drops. I was amazed,angry and insulted! There was absolutely nothing wrong with my baby. No questions were asked about what sort of and how much solid food she was on. Just because she was not on formula (which has added vitamins and minerals) I was advised to give these supplements. There was no evidence whatsoever that my baby was deficient in any nutrient.

If this were really necessary, the human race would have died out long ago. I challenged the hv, and she just said that it was the government's advice and she had been told to give it.

I would say to mums who are given advice, especially unsolicited advice by any health professional, ask for the evidence on which it is based. Ask: what will happen if I don't take this advice?

That kind of bullying and intimidation makes me really cross Kami, and it's not the first story of it that I've heard. Did this happen to you in UK and how long ago was it?