Night Feeders Part 4 Up All Night Feeding, newborns, sleep regressions, toddlers, every knackered Mummy welcome!

[Cannotbelieveit]

Here's a fresh thread!

Let's start by introducing us/babies again

DS up and cranky for the past hour. Grr, I knew the sleeping through was too good to last.

Dilys that sounds about average I'm afraid!

Thought as much!

Dilys
Welcome I'm new too and my DS is only a week old. I'm demand feeding and as much as he sleeps well in the day he wakes every hour or so in the night.
Your a brave woman for having 3 I've had one labour and that was enough for me, although I am starting to forget already

Ds is now refusing the breast this boy cannot make his mind up! He has however slept much better and is currently fast asleep in bed for the third time tonight!

Welcome dilys - yep sounds normal for 4 weeks.

ds woke at 5; 30 fed, fell asleep then woke screaming - I'm starting to think he may be ill though no temperature so gave him calpol and he's just fallen asleep on my shoulder after much rocking etc. so I'm stuck like this til he wakes as he's not in a very deep sleep. good job dp hasn't left for work yet so he can get me some breakfast!

Welcome dilys, sounds normal yes. Is your newest baby a boy too? How old are your other DC?

Ryder up for the day at 6.50 and DS1 was up at 7. We've gotta be out by 10.45 so I had to get up early anyway.

The two boys are 5.5 and 3.5. Newborn is a girl.

Must say that I am really feeling this addition! The boys are demanding and my boobs have remained slightly engorged since the milk came in. Def no more kids!

Every time we do a newborn, DH and I are very tested. Lots of sniping and competing over who is doing more. Does anyone else feel like they and DH need to pull together more? He feels like he takes the brunt of the boys but I do the nights alone and he simply doesn't see this as that big a deal!

Oh well! Feel very lucky to have 3 kids, or at least i hope I will feel that way in a couple of years!

yep dilys - this is our first ds (12 weeks tomorrow) and I feel like you about nights. dp does majority of the house stuff but that frustrates me too cos it's not to my 'standard' (that sounds awful but I mean he notices laundry and washing up but misses that the stairs need hoovering or the skirting boards if you see what I mean?!)

Sorry in advance but I'm going to have a moan cos I can't in rl... been looking at Xmas boards and getting excited for baby's first xmas but then I remembered it's the first Xmas without mil and as such xmas will revolve around that and what other people want to do. I know this sounds selfish but I'm upset that ds's first few weeks were affected by mils death, his first xmas will be and his first birthday will be as it will also be the first anniversary.

Ladies I totally get it too. I do all the night time stuff with DS and as good as DP is, your right auntie maggie his standards just aren't the same as mine! I'm Gona find it tough when he goes back to work as I like a tidy home.
Dilys we haven't started competing yet but I so know it's only a matter of time, he already thinks he changes more nappies than me! Lol

Welcome dilys - congratulations on your daughter!! I sympathise with the strain on the relationship as I've been there myself. Me and DH were constantly snapping at each other and bickering, it was really horrible.

auntmaggie - my MIL died a few months after DS was born, she only got to hold him the once, and I know Christmas will be shadowed by her absence. I really really miss her and as hard as I will try to keep Christmas a happy occasion I will also be very sad she won't be there with us to see his first Christmas.

Sorry about your mil writer - I think you told me before. I of course am and will be incredibly sad and miss her and am sad she is missing these occasions there is this part of me that what should be really happy times for ds will be affected if that makes sense. His birthday will always be days after the anniversary of her death. its just not what I wanted for him if that makes sense - I would rather it would've been on my birthday. It's already been decided for us where we will be spending xmas and yesterday I started talking about xmas to ds and DP didn't seem happy. He is struggling with her death every day in one way or another and I can't see a time where this won't be the case or when I won't feel bad for wanting something to be happy. I'm probably not explaining this very well but I feel like I'm trapped in this bubble of sadness :(

The way I look at it is although this will be DS's first Christmas he's far too young to really have any idea what's going in, it will be just another day to him. Next year will be a totally different ball game though and that's the one I'm looking forward to

I understand what you mean about the bubble of sadness and please don't take on any guilt about how you are feeling, you're only human and their is nothing wrong about wanting your son to be surrounded by happiness on his special days

We have had quite a few arguments recently about DH pulling this weight with the baby.

In the early days it worked well that he did the lions share of the domestic stuff and I did all of the baby care - EBF so did all the night feeds and settling to sleep etc..

Now though he just goes down awake for his naps and generally only feeds once in the night but looking after him in the day is so much more demanding - he needs constant entertainment and stimulation and is so heavy to pick up and put down all the time, it's exhausting and also quite overwhelming having to do it all day, every day 7 days a week (on a broken nights sleep)

So I've said to my DH that it's time to stop hiding behind the domestic chores as a defence for not doing fair share of baby stuff - I'm perfectly capable for doing my fair share of that now but I NEED some time off looking after him for my own sanity.

I feel like I have to specifically ask him to look after him in advance if it's for a specific reason (rather than, just "because he's your son"). I just want to be able to go out to lunch with a friend alone or even just watch a film on iPad in bed on my own for a couple of hours.

I completely agree missmugoo - caring for DS now is far more tiresome and draining than it ever was when he was a newborn. There's just no respite from it.

What did your DH say??

Thank you writer

mrsmugoo I feel the same about dp - he tries but I have to ask him to do stuff like take ds downstairs so I can sleep longer or take a shower and then he seems to give him back at the first opportunity - I'd even be happy to have a couple of hours to do housework!

Hi all, I was out all morning and then had a friend round so only catching up with the thread now.

I didn't have a great night couldn't sleep as it was so hot BUT... DS went down at around 8.30, woke for a feed at 12.40, was apparently quickly re settled by DH at 4.15 (I was in spare room) and didn't wake for the day until 7

That's his best night EVER. I hope we can repeat it tonight

I totally agree that they get more exhausting as they get bigger. DS is crawling and pulling himself up now so I spend most of the day on my hands and knees trying to prevent him banging his head, falling over etc. Then DH comes home and starts to cook, and I think "no, hang on, I'm perfectly capable of doing that now. You play with the baby and I'll do dinner!" DH is fine with that, and great at pulling his weight all round, but we've just got into the habit of him doing household stuff and me doing 'baby' so that sometimes we have to remind ourselves that we can swap now!

Lol and I thought having a new born was hard, looks like I have it alllll to come.
May I ask some advise, bcause it is so warm tonight what will you all be putting babies to sleep in tonight?
Remember my DS is only a week old, just don't want him to over hear or be too cold.....many thanks in advance

I'm not being unsympathetic about all of your posts I just can't remember who wrote what. Christmas is always a really emotional time I lost my dad at Christmas 5 yrs ago and it's always hard, but I get the wanting to be happy and surrounded by happy times, life does go on unfortunately but it doesn't mean we can't remember our loved ones.
How about doing a photo book for your DH and giving it to him to show you understand how he feels and giving him something to look back and reflect on ....I did them for my sis and mum and they did one for me...
X

Hi everyone had a friend over today so only just catching up.

Competitive tiredness at the beginning with me and DH but we have settled into a routine now. Tho I have to say apart from him putting the bins out occasionally I do all the housework and baby stuff. Tho DH pretty much does DS1's bath time most nights. Obviously he cuddles DS2 and plays with him but as he's a bottle refuser DH is limited with him!

Sammy your suggestion of a photo book for those that have lost someone is really nice

DS just having his last feed, hoping for a decent night again

My DS has slept a lot of the day and still asleep now! I hoping he will wake soon so I can try and keep him up till 10 then hopefully he will go down all night...well 4 hours

Help with the what to dress him in??

I'm doing DS's bedtime feed at the moment. It's about 45 minutes earlier than usual but we've had a long day, he looks tired, so thought I'd give it a whirl

As soon as he's asleep I'm going to catch up with The Great British Bake Off!!!

We've had a textbook day - 2 naps (1 hour + 1.5 hours) and bed at just after 7. Plus he actually ate his dinner tonight - minced beef & sweet potato

Sammy - my DS will is just wearing a long sleeved vest tonight. He has a baby sleeping bag but I'm guessing your little one still has blankets... If it was me I'd probably just use a v light one up to his waist.

I can't remember who asked about the massage strokes (sorry!) but there's one where you used two hands going clockwise on his tummy which seemed to help. Also, I've read being carried in a sling/ baby carrier can help with wind - although I'm a big fan of my baby carrier so buy into all the baby wearing propaganda!

DS just having his final feed now...

Just doing begins feed here. Trying my best to recreate last night in the vain hope that he sleeps well again!

Sammy my DS is in a bodysuit and a 1.5 tog sleeping bag but he's a lot older (8 months) so your little one might need more layers than that. Sorry, not much help!

Oh and long sleeve vest and 1.0tog bag tonight the room is currently 23deg and will drop to 21 later