Night feeders thread part 3 - Up all night feeding? Come join! [title edited by MNHQ]

[mrsmugoo]

Part 3!

Quick recap - DS, 17 weeks, EBF (stubborn little bottle refuser), crap sleeper! Super knackered Mummy, surviving on 1-2 hour sleeps :(

So I am hoping for a better night tonight seeing as bedtime went smoothly. Last night was hideous and I've eaten a twirl, a bounty and a salted caramel brownie today just to get through the day!

Micro I third what the others say. DS was a nightmare for the first 6-8 weeks. He had bad colic and if he wasn't sleeping or feeding he was screaming. He's now 5 months and generally a very happy and smiley baby. The change is remarkable so hang in there!

I managed some sleep last night but DS was wide awake at 7am and I was shattered and in need of more sleep. He dropped off again at about 8.30 and is still asleep but of course by then I was wide awake, the little monkey!

Writer it's just me and DP doing the packing for our move but he's recruited 2 friends to help with the actual move and his parents are coming down too so that his mum can keep an eye on DS while we unpack. Hopefully it'll make them realise that it's probably worth their woe to spend a bit more time with their grandson.

*worth their while, not their woe!

Welcome micronaut - yes those first few weeks are utterly, utterly gruelling. No one could have prepared me for the barrage of hormones and the bone crunching, relentless sleep deprivation.

It does get easier I promise, but you have to align your expectations and grit your teeth for the first 3-6 months as being a very hard slog!

Babies cry, they have wind/colic and they don't sleep very long - it's normal and there's nothing much you can do about it except ride it out and find coping mechanisms. I remember at the start thinking "oh my god this is horrific, surely this can't be how it really is??"

If your DW is bottle feeding then can you maybe arrange to do shifts? You let her sleep say 8pm-midnight then she takes over 12-6 and then you let her sleep a bit more from 6-8 before you leave for work? That way you both get some unbroken sleep. My DS has never taken a bottle so I have never been able to do this! It's very normal for newborns to only sleep in short blocks of 1-3 hours. My DS is 4 months and it's still rare that I sleep more than 3 hours in one stretch even now!

It's also normal for newborns to want to feed little and often, their tummies are the size of a walnut. If after she's fed a decent amount and is still rooting to suck, maybe you could try a dummy?

Micronaut you have my deepest sympathies, it does improve slowly one day you'll wake and realuse "oh DC is 4/5/6 months old and we didn't all kill each other" it feels like it'll never end until you find you blinked and it did.

I recommend the Wonder Weeks as a fantastic read. I can't spell the authors names in my current state, but that book kept my husband going when things got really bad

micronaut I would also add that I don't expect you to believe us when we say things will get better - god knows I didn't believe it, but they did!

Good luck for today johull hope you get plenty of support.

@ Polly: "Oh DC is 4/5/6 months old and we didn't all kill each other" is exactly it

Lol Kate not that I'm believig my own reassurances yet.

I once read something that said everything is a phase, the good and the bad. I cling to that through the screaming.

Seeing the paediatrician today, cingers crossed he'll say I can have dairy again and maybe he'll shed somd light on the screaming fits

Can i join you? I stumbled on this thread by accident and read it thinking it might help me get through this nightmare phase with 4 week old DS but it's just scared me instead reading your experiences!

I'm breastfeeding but what I'm really struggling with is getting DS to stay asleep when I put him down as he just wants to sleep on me! The nightfeeds wouldn't be so bad then! I downloaded a white noise app but it doesn't seem to work! I congratulated someone on another thread for managing to eat a sandwich cos I would struggle to even make it to the kitchen to make one atm!

We've had a busy day over here and I'm not sure whether it means we'll have a good night or a bad one.

He had about an hours nap around lunch time and then fell asleep again at about 17.30pm. I woke him up at 20.00 but Lord knows how long he would have slept for if I'd left him alone.

I smothered him in moisturising lotion as it has been so, so hot over here todayand now I'm feeding him. I'm hoping that because I woke him for this feed it means he will drop off again but I'm not holding my breath.

I spoke to one of my bosses today about my plans to return to work - very depressing!!!

Welcome auntie - please don't be scared

We first started these 'feeding during the night' threads months ago when our babies were probably the same age as your DS is now and when I read those back I can't believe how awful and stressful things were - I don't know how we survived it!! But we did, and so will you, it just probably doesn't feel like it right now.

Most of the current horror posts are because babies are going through regressions, teething pains and dealing with the heat - it's a bad combination when wanting to get a decent nights sleep

However, I hope you took note of the good phases we had and not just the bad ones

Sorry auntie, I meant to add, have you tried co-sleeping and slings to try and help solve your problems?

Welcome Auntie! Oh yes I remember the painstaking process of trying to transfer sleeping DS to his Moses basket and then holding my breath to see if he'd stay down. I think something that helped me was swaddling him in a blanket so that when I put him down he was already cosy and wasn't being put down into a cold, flat surface. I also used to stuff rolled up blankets in around him to form a little cocoon to make it as womb-like as possible. At 4 weeks they basically have no idea where they stop and you start, they barely know they've been born!

We've had a horrendous day today. DS has had calpol for the first time in his life today as he's teething - he's got a teeny tiny piece of tooth that's cut through on the bottom.

He's really hard work at the moment - if I put him down he immediately rolls on his front and then cries because he can't stay there. Then cries when I turn him over. Cries when I hold him. Cries after 5 minutes in the bumbo. It's flipping exhausting!

He was up at 6:30 this morning meaning so his naps have been all over the shop. He was asleep in his cot by 7:45pm.

Even though I haven't left the house today I feel shattered! Here's hoping for at least one decent stretch of sleep!

Sorry, late to the party.

DS 25weeks(can't quite admit he's 6mnths on Friday and still not sleeping)

Goes to bed fine most of the time and mostly sleeps 3hrs at the beginning of the night but after first wake up he's up every 2 hrs and has started to want to play at 5!!!!!! ahhhhhh

Beyond tired and suspect PND

Any help welcome!!!!

Hi bumpies!

Is he in his own room? Does he self settle or go down asleep? Does he cry when he wakes? Can you settle him without feeding?

The reason for asking is that since my DS worked out how to self settle we tend to leave him when he wakes in the night and he'll usually go back to sleep by himself now. Before, it would be a feed every time as that was my only way of getting him back to sleep.

It is hard to ignore the wakings after you've become accustomed to responding to their every whimper - hence why I can't wait to get him in his own room!

Swaddling was great for the first two weeks but even having kept blinds shut and stuff the bedroom is still really warm.

I'm going to borrow a sling from a friend but I'm really nervous about cosleeping tbh. Even in this heat I'm sleeping with a duvet cos some drugs I'm on mess with my temperature.

We have got a big fan for our bedroom now suntie which we keep on all night and I definitely think it helps. All DS wears at bedtime is a vest and a pair of socks - I definitely think being too warm makes their sleep disturbed.

Welcome bumpies - have you sought any advice or support from your HV or GP if you suspect PND? Do you have much help with your son from family members?

johull - I hope your appointment went ok x

Auntie you could swaddle with a muslin?

I co-slept from when DS grew out of his Moses basket at 8 weeks til 16 weeks when he was starting to take up too much space! For next baby I will definitely co-sleep from birth though - you don't have the baby in your duvet though. My DS was in a grobag. A newborn would be swaddled or under their own cellular blanket or whatever.

I have to put my DS in a grobag even though it is hot otherwise he wriggles and rolls and sticks his legs through the cot bars. I'm getting an air wrap to go round the cot and a 0.5 tog grobag this week though.

I was worried about that too mrsmugoo - except I'm on about the bars of his cribs. I was really worried about him getting his arms and legs stuck in them so I went and bought some bumpers that go all the way round the crib. It also helps that he loves looking at them (they have zoo animals on them) and it keeps him quiet whilst drifting off to sleep

Dreadful day today. DS has been inconsolable for most of it and only had 2 short naps and is still showing no sign of sleepiness. I don't feel well either and am achy all over so hope I'm not coming down with something. DP has taken him for a bit, ostensibly so I can get some sleep, but it's difficult when I can hear him crying. This bloody heat doesn't help - tomorrow we are staying in all day with the fan blowing on us!

Welcome to the newbies on the thread btw.

Well it's 22.00pm and he has finally fallen asleep. Fingers crossed he stays that way for at least 8 hours

Writer - just be careful with the bumpers when your LO is rolling, apparently they are a suffocation risk hence the air wrap I'm getting - it's safe for LOs if they roll and face plant into it.

Finally got a break, DD was asleep by 6:55 tonight with minimal fuss thank god!

She's just had a feed and gone down nice and easy again so I am going back to sleep. :)

Hi to the newbies, there's great advice and support here you're jn the right place. DS is settling into a pattern of cluster feeding all evening, going down around 11pm then waking for feeds around 2am and 5am. I can't work out if it is good or not as I am getting several 2hr sleeps...but then I have friends with babies same age who sleep through 10pm-6am!?? Did your DCs still wake every 3hrs at 7 weeks?

Worst thing at the mo is that I'm arguing loads with DH. It's mostly my fault but as I look fine on the outside he doesn't realise how the lack of sleep affects my mood and tolerance levels??