How to stay awake during night feeds part 3 - wishing for sleepy dust

[TeaandHobnobs]

Welcome all to a shiny new thread for moral support during night feeds, general food envy and chit chat

Small I'm of the "if it ain't broke, don't fix it" camp - some may say feeding to sleep is "making a rod for your own back", but if I find it is the most effective way of getting DS to sleep and stay asleep (!), I do it.

But you could always test for daytime naps to see if DS can settle by himself - sorry, I'm afraid I can't remember how old he is [hblush], so he may not be in the stage where he has more obvious naps yet (as opposed to just randomly sleeping throughout the day!).

I use a dummy, but as DS has got older, he doesn't always use it to get to sleep now - sometimes it helps if he starts to cry as I put him down, but it is not a magic solution here, if he is pissed off, he is pissed off, and no amount of dummying will change that!

Hi babylon [hsmile]

small I feed to sleep too!

How old was everyone's little ones when they started having a 'bed time'?

Mrs About two months ish, mabe two and a half ish is probably more accurate I'd say the last four weeks are when it seems to have worked pretty consistently. I did try really early at about six weeks but I just got fed up sitting on my own in a dark room with a very awake baby so knocked it on the head!!

Small that is exactly how we get baby J to sleep. We are trying to get him to self sooth or sleep after bottle but its bit happening.

I though we had a break through today. Baby had a great nap today, he fell asleep straight after a bottle. Tonight we have tried a bottle at bed time & he fell asleep for 6.30 ( took him to do bed routine early as he seemed very tired) an hour layer he had woke up screaming so went up and gave him the rest of the bottle but he would not settle. I've had to put him on the boob to settle him

6 months! [hblush] [hgrin] (but 4 months corrected I guess)

Helloooooo mummies! to everyone, old and new!!

Can't believe how amazing the threads have been... I've just tried to catch up a bit, but its taken me hours!

I've been AWOL for far too long... Unfortunately not because DD miss periwinkle is sleeping through, just from sheer exhaustion and the fact we had to go cold turkey from BF to bottle 2 weeks ago and now I have no free hands at the night feeds!!! After that first night when I posted after another long absence, it still took a few more exhausting days for her to get bottle feeding consistently well. Then I went to my mum and dads, but she wouldn't yet take the bottle from anyone else :(

2 weeks now down the line and she is officially fully bottle fed, and will take it off DH too :o. She also started off taking frequent small amounts at the beginning, so was up every 2 hrs again, but now she has a full 3-4oz at a time and is only feeding once between 11pm and 7am :o

She didn't gain weight either last time weighed :( I know it's just because of the bottle fiasco, but it was still disappointing. At least she didn't lose though. Weigh in again Tuesday, but I'm pretty sure she's gained this time thanks to the formula!

To anyone struggling with early BF, keep going, but most importantly- keep talking to people/going to groups/ and using this thread :o

Having had a screaming, refluxing, non-gaining weight, bottle refusing premmie baby, I couldn't have survived without MN and especially this thread, and I miss it now! It does all get better and even though she's still tiny (9lb 8oz) at nearly 8 months actual (5.5months corrected), she seems to be developing appropriately and is healthy and happy some of the time!!! we are sooo lucky to have her and I am very grateful to MN and this thread for keeping me same at some v difficult times.

Oh dear- I've just looked back at this ridiculously long and emotional post, so sorry! Hope you're all in for a good night, I'm gonna keep trying to keep up and post occasionally.

Nighty night!

Sorry that should say - isn't happening not bit

small I do a feed in the bedroom with low light on, then put him into grobag, cuddle for a few minutes then into cot, put Ewan on and watch him for a while until he has dropped off. Depending on the time I'll either get into bed at that point or I'll put the monitor on and spend some time with dh. Not sure whether I'm doing anything that is 'recommended' by 'experts' but it works for us!

We tried to feed him expressed milk for the first time tonight. He took a lot of it but not without screaming the house down throughout Hopefully with time he will get more used to it!

We don't have a bedtime yet, ds is almost 5 weeks, but I'm wondering when to start?

Hi there. Not sure how much I will post as DS is only 3 days old so cluster feeding all night, and requiring concentration from me, but I would like to join please. I have two older girls age 6 and 2.

Thanks Tea and Marbles Think it was due to MiniPop getting a cold though, he's turned into aproper snot monster today, and has a tummy bug too I think (Green stringy bits in poo and tummy cramps) :(

Glad you got a Nap MrsN [hgrin] but :( for the projectile vomit. I think if you have two projectile voms in a row you need to see a doctor, otherwise check for signs of dehydration.

Oooh Goat a RL hot chocoalte, I almost had one today but had a pumpkin latte instead, it was delish! And yes always have trouble getting pressies for DP as he never wants anything

Small I also feed/rock to sleep at bedtime, but during day Minipop can settle himself sometimes.

Hello Babylon waves :)

MummyV Hope you have a good night tonight.. fingers crossed!

Yay! Sarita How are you? Glad the bottle feeding is working, and DP gets to do his share too. Also glad this thread kept you sain, sounds like you are on the right track now.

Hi Valium :) congrats on your little one.

Well, we've had a bit of a day here (it's a loooong story involving a stupidly place hand drier in the baby changing room [hangry]) which resulted in lots and lots of inconsolable screaming, then an accidential arm bumb caused even more screaming and crying, and he's also getting a cold and has a bit of a tummy upset (green bits in poo). So after our great night last night (possible due to germs)
It's been a bit of a nightmare evening, so doubt we'll have a repeat tonight. Hey ho!

Welcome valium

What a lovely post sarita - I couldn't do without this thread either [hsmile]

That's good to know susie and tea, I was worried I was doing something wrong as he still hasn't had his bath yet because he didn't wake up til half 6 - but he's only 6 weeks so plenty of time!

Evening all

Missmarbles was knackered and went down just after 7 tonight; hopefully will stay that way for 6 hours. Friday night may have been a fluke, Susie. if she does it again, I tell her to let Babyloo know

I am aiming for a 7 o'clock bedtime with Missmarbles but it's more by fluke than design at the minute and I feed her to sleep ,most of the time. Sometimes she self-settles but I can't remember when they actually do that for real developmentally. I remember worrying with DD1 about making a rod etc but I think you have to do what you have to do and can sort out anything you want to later on. If I had realised that, earlier last time round, I reckon it would have been less stressful. The days are long but the years are short. As with everything: this too shall pass, and they will self settle eventually. I'm trying to enjoy the dark hour cuddles because time does pass so quickly DD1 was premmie and DD2 took a looonng time to arrive, and already they are growing so fast. DD1 is nearly 8 I know it's a good thing but my babies won't be babies for long. I hope that doesn't sound preachy, I am sure I will be wishing I had had a stricter routine, when she is 4 and still requiring me to cuddle her til she sleeps

I was given a poem when DD1 was born, it still makes me cry:

They told me babies should not be held;
it would spoil them and make them cry.
I wished to do what's best for them,
and the years went swiftly by.
Now empty are my yearning arms;
no more that trill sublime.
If I had my babies back again,
I'd hold them all the time.
~ anonymous

Sniff

Hello VQ. Waves

I've kept my DS up since 1800, hopefully ill get some sleep tonight. My plan is to bath him in the next hour to really relax him. Fingers crossed.

Evil

Ahhh that's lovely marbles :) I has 6 weeks where I couldn't cuddle minipop properly when he was in nicu, so I aways make the most of my cuddles, I have a lot to make up for :D

Thanks ladies glad I am not alone with feeding to sleep! He is 9 weeks today so quite small still, too young to self settle?
He normally sleeps until 11 after his 7 o clock bedtime but has woken up now so hoping this is not the start of two hourly feeding........

That is a lovely poem marbles. I was lucky as my LO was only in nicu 18 days but still long enough for me to feel like l never want to put him down when l am a bit tired and emotional (most of the time then!). Think he must have heard that as he was fast asleep and has just started grizzling....

Waves to VQ.

That's a lovely poem marbles [hsmile] and minipopsmum very true about the cuddles being so special.

really pleased things are going well, it hasn't been an easy 8 months, I'm sure, but great to hear things are progressing!

DS is being lulled to sleep by his baby monitor playing a plinky plonky Brahms' lullaby - makes me laugh, as when he was 4 weeks old, the only thinking that would get him to sleep was me singing it with made up words [hgrin] When I first played it on the monitor a few nights ago, he grinned at it manically!

Once he's settled, I want to finish my cottage pie and watch last night's The Thick of It with DH. Tomorrow is an empty day - no swimming, so I think I will try and get on with making some more purées for the freezer.

Wishing good nights to all!

DD1 was in just short of 6 weeks too Mini, and a meanie nurse told me I would spoil her with too many cuddles Silly woman! She clearly had never had a child in NICU no matter how many she may have nursed there.

Wow there's a lot going on. So my Lo is still up. Having yet another bottle. Hopefully I'll be able to get him down after this as I'm exhausted. Also fingers crossed he will sleep in his own bed tonight. Shall check in later when he gets up again.

Also that poem is very sweet. I shall remember it :)

Aw marbles what a lovely but kind of sad poem

Feeling emotional tonight anyway as me and hubby had a row. Won't bore you with the details but I'm feeling pretty lousy. Sure it will easily be forgotten about but don't want to talk about it with him now cause I'm too annoyed and we argued in front of little fella so feel guilty too.

Blurgh, good job I have some cadburys mint bubbly choc

Went to bed early and have been woken by serious twisting on monitor, walked into nursery for immediate settling effect. The question is: do I go back to bed or wait for real feeding cues??

Back to bed it is!

Oh marbles that's such a lovely poem, brought a tear to my eye. It's so so true, I hate hearing people saying you can spoil a baby by cuddling, such a ridiculous thing to day of course you can't spoil them. Babies thrive on love (and copious amounts of milk!), I strongly believe that the first 6 weeks are for feeding and cuddling only, anything else you manage is a bonus. I wish I'd known more when I had DD1 as it would have been less stressful but I'm glad I know now and can appreciate DD2 in all her newborn snuggly-ness.

Oh mrsn that's rubbish hope you're ok. Sending virtual hugs your way, and I'd send virtual chocolate but the real thing is so much better so tuck in and enjoy :)

Welcome valium how are you finding having a new baby with your two older DCs?

We had a nice day today, I took both DDs to my friend's daughter's 6th birthday party, DD1 is only 2 but she had a fantastic time running round like a loony with all the bigger children & DD2 slept in her moby wrap the whole time leaving me free to scoff all the party food

It's cold here too, we've got a gro egg like a lot of you and its been blue for a couple if days now :( DD1 has gone to bed in a big woolly jumper that my friend knitted for her, she looks really cosy. Our room isn't quite so cold so hopefully babylump will be warm enough in her fleecy blanket.

goat I didn't know Langley Pk had a cafe too, we go to Black Pk a lot for coffee and cake before feeding the ducks but I've not been over to Langley for a few years is it worth a revisit then?

Good luck tonight everyone, hope the sleepy dust has been distributed to all.

1st feed of the night but he probably would have slept longer if I has left him to grizzle a bit more but didn't want him to wake up properly, would love him to go through till 3 or 4 now but will be more like 2.

Nice to hear from you sarita and hello to everyone else, I'm going to attempt cot transfer number one in five mins, enjoying the cuddles a little while longer, great poem and I get told a lot about the rod for your own back but I just ignore it or say 'well it won't be your problem so I shouldn't worry about it too much'.

Have a good night everyone and hth to mrs, rows are horrible.

Welcome vq nice to see you here. Don't worry about posting often, just read and enjoy the insanity!

Thank you for the poem, marbles and like the other members of the nicu club I feel I am making up for lost time... And how on earth can you spoil a baby by communicating love and security to it?? I am just so glad to have a baby who loves the cuddles as much as I do!

mrsn that's [hsad] about the row. I hope at least the choc is helping!

heff Langley is def improved, they have done a lot of work. The rhododendron garden is lovely,and there is a lake with ducks begging to be fed! And of course fab hot choc! Also quite a nice children's play area.

We are off to the grandparents tomorrow. Grandad is very funny as he likes to pretend that he is indifferent to Kid's charms and that we believe him on this! Oh, so it is complete coincidence that half your friends just happen to be passing through while we are there?... [hgrin]

goat that is so funny about your FIL! I think men our parents' age are in one camp or the other with babies. My FIL is too scared to hold babyfunch in case he drops her or something, but DH caught him welling up over how beautiful she is...bless. We went to my uncle's on Friday and he was dead keen to get his hands on her for snuggles as he loves babies. Such different approaches but both touching.

Welcome VQ, come and join the fun (don't read the thread while hungry though!)

I do the feed, ten minute sleep on me then cot transfer too (wasn't always doing then ten minutes bit but the idea came from this thread and is working well-another thing to thank you ladies for.). Babyfunch has never ever fed without ending up asleep - bit nervous as to what it will be like when she does finally find herself both full and awake!

DH and I also had a row tonight, sorry to hear you are in the same boat vicky. We have made up now, it was partly down to me being so tired and a bit grumpy but I was right too.

Babyfunch slept from 7 til 11.30 and is now on second boob so hopefully will go 2-3 hours once I pit her back down...