High need baby support thread

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Does this sound like your baby?

1. Feeds frequently daytime
2. Feeds frequently nighttime
3. Needs to be constantly held
4. Wont sleep alone
5. Hates the car seat/pram
6. Short naps

If so - join the club! :)

Hi sleepy mummies, hope you're all well and all poorly babies are feeling better.

Had a couple of ok nights. What is really weird is that when he wakes at night now, he no longer wants the boob. He moans (because he wants to be asleep) but I don't know how to help him get there. I just cuddle him, which seems to irritate him but eventually he drops off. I guess it's because he's not as hungry now we're weaning? Any experienced mums had the same thing? My boobs feel like rocks all night, it's so uncomfy.

Had a depressing drink with my antenatal group yesterday. DS still the only non-sleeper. He also screamed blue murder when I abandoned him with someone so I could have a wee. Everyone looked very unimpressed when I got back "does he always do that?" Erm, yes Also, lots of predictable Qs about BLW and when I was planning on stopping BF (am the only person doing these). I replied "oh I think when he goes off to university." "that's disgusting" was the reply. It was a joke. I hope....

I bet not all of them are sleeping Queenkong - and I bet their babies aren't as alert and interesting as your DS! In my antenatal group I may have the worst sleeper but he's also been the first to smile and roll (and is the cutest although possibly not at my most objective!).

I've had that BF conversation with my mum this week, who mentioned that she hoped I'd stop as soon as he's 1, and she was horrified when I said I was thinking of letting him self wean. She has a short memory though because she was still BFing me when I was over 1 because I wouldn't eat very much

DS has stepped up the overnight feeds going from very 2hrs to every 1.5hrs. I think he's just doing it for comfort because his gums are sore as he only wants a few minutes then goes back to sleep.

Well quite! DS is obviously the cutest! It's all quite competitive in the group, not supportive at all - which I thought was the whole idea of those groups. Think I'll bow out gradually after Christmas. I give myself a hard enough time without others doing it too.

How old is baby spanner? DS was in a feeding frenzy while his bottom two teeth came in, so it might well be that.

Don't blame you for backing away from the "support" group queenkong! What is with people???

I nearly lamped a woman in the queue at boots yesterday. DS hates it in there (think it's the perfume) and was consequently wailing in the long queue whilst in my sling. I could see the woman in front of me desperately trying to catch my eye so she could talk to me about DS, while I was trying to avoid her - I hate trying to talk politely while he's screaming! Eventually I had to give in and smiled at her, and she asked how old he is, followed by "does he sleep through the night yet?". I just laughed and then glared. Why oh why do people ask that?? I'm sure I'm just over sensitive, not least as DS was screaming in my face, but still!

We've had a few much needed reasonable nights. When my DS wakes, if he decides he doesn't want to feed the only solution seems to be to get out of bed and rock him. It doesn't usually take long to get him back to sleep, but it's annoying to have to get up. Cuddling in bed usually results in screaming!

Hello ladies!! I've actually started lying ( to some incl my mum) about ds sleeping habits!! It's easier than listening to stupid advice - I mean he's my fourth!! The only one not to be a good sleeper, he's weaning, so they can keep their advice!!
On the plus side, he's been sleeping from 7 pm till 2 am!!! In my book that's sleeping thru!! He's snacking now during the night but I'm happy enough with that! Daytime naps are catnaps still, which does bother me.... As far as I remember, my others were on 2 good naps by now- anyone any thoughts? Some days I try too hard to get longer naps, which stresses me out and other days I go with flow- of course it means I get nothing done in the house.

He's sitting up really well on his own and smiling away at the minute, I've been using the amber necklace too, which I think is really helping

I'Ve been reading all your posts with great interest and was wondering could any of your babies have been twins in the womb?
I know it seems a bit 'out there' and woo woo but i was a twin and my twin died in utero (mum had some bleeding early on and there were two afterrbirths at birth but the double afterbirth doesn't always happen apparently).
Anyway, I'm mentioning it because I was that baby and toddler you're all describing.
I couldn't be left, I needed to be held all the time or I screamed. Seems I was afraid that if mum left me she'd never come back. I couldn't sleep on my own, was afraid of the dark, couldn't be given to someone else, had food issues, etc, etc.
I have grown up to be a healthy, independent woman but still have some insecurities about being left, etc.
I just thought I'd put it out there to see what you think. Please don't flame me I know it's a bit weird!

Hideous night last night. Feeds every 90 minutes, ugh. And for some reason I felt like my normally uberfast milk flow/letdown had slowed to a crawl... DS was getting understandably impatient while waiting for my milk - it normally comes too fast!

When is this baby lark meant to start getting easier again?

Hi Born! Interesting point but I'm fairly sure ds was singleton. I'm happy to hear though how you've grown to be independent! Very reassuring!

Aww Tickle no advice- just a nice arm punch!!! It gets easier when they leave home

That's interesting. I don't know how I'd know. Twins do run in my family though. I was terrified that my first scan would reveal twins. I'm even more terrified now at the prospect of the next bump being twins!

Regardless of why your babies need lots of cuddles and attention just know that it's not your fault and by giving them lots of what they need you're being fantastic mums.
You're giving them security and safety and reassurance as well as the knowledge that you're there for them.

Thank you. It's so nice to hear stuff like that.

born we're fairly certain DS was. I had very heavy bleeding around 8 weeks, HCG levelling off, scans showed 1 baby and a big bleed site.

Bad night/good night alternating here. I'm trying not to panic at the prospect of tomorrow night's long haul flight.... I just so hope he's good and charming over Christmas. When he's good he's so very, very good that when he's bad it makes it look even worse.

mampig I lie. Lots.

queen sod what everyone else says. I wish I knew how to get DS back to sleep when he wakes in the middle of the night. He's such a light sleeper :(

Frak , that's awful!! I had same in my first pg, and twins run in my family. Also, looking back, he was hn too! It's been my boys who are hn. My first girl was a dream, and my second girl is hn sometimes, but she's 2 atm, so therein lies the trouble with her lol! Haven't even been Xmas shopping because she is sooo loud when in a strop
Thank heaven for tiniternet!!!!

Queenkong - thanks for the smooches, they were lovely! Lots of people don't know they're 'womb twin survivors' as we're called, sometimes the only way to know is through childhood and baby needs and behaviours. Twins run in my family too, it's so scary every time your pg.

Ohfrak - lots and lots of cuddles for your ds, keep doing what your doing and continue to make him feel safe. Tell him lots and lots that your not going anywhere and you'll always be there for him (I know he won't understand yet but your starting a longterm security thing with it). Lots of reassurance and very close cuddles and talking eg hold him so close to your face as if you and him are one person and if possible lots of skin to skin contact. Basically let him feel as close to you as he did his twin.

He wakes in the night because he's scared and feels alone (I've always been a light and poor sleeper and still sometime wake up feeling like this). All I want is human contact and someone to talk to me to make me feel safe again. Good luck with the flight, and if he's not perfect don't let anyone make you feel bad. Your doing a great job in a difficult situation.

Hey ladies, I've not been around for a while as had mum & dad staying and it's all been a bit crazy. How is everyone? Here, have some and s

The health visitor came back on Tues and confirmed that LO is still on the 74th centile so although he hasn't climbed back up he doesn't seem to be dropping any more. She was lovely actually. Ended up mediating between DP and I on our parenting choices (& supported my ideas, which was helpful!)

We're getting a leeetle more sleep since DP started sleeping on LO's side of the bed. He's ignoring all the little noises and just passing him to me for a feed after the big cries but 16 week jabs yesterday plus signs of another tooth this morning equals one very fractious baby!

On the plus side, the Christmas tree looks lovely! Anyone else's LOs loving the tree and the lights?

What's up truth? So, I take it the 'routine' has gone out the window?

I took DS for a little photo shoot. It was free and I thought I could get a photo as a Christmas surprise for daddy. Let's just hope daddy wants a photo of his pride and joy screaming.

Haha Queen. We have lots of pics of our pride & joy screaming! Did any of the shots work out or is it another "I'll laugh about it one day" experience?

The routine has indeed been banished, tho I am still trying to space out feeds a little bit as we'd got into a bad habit if lots of snacking & I agree that fewer , longer feeds will probably be better.

DP hasn't quite given up on the idea of a routine though. He settled LO to sleep tonight (hooray!) & then appeared downstairs saying 'I don't know why you make it look so hard very night. You just have to stay calm. We should do blah blah blah every night.' I managed not to throw the knife I was holding at him & muttered something about one night not making a routine. Sure enough, an hour later I'm lying in bed feeding LO & DP is downstairs muttering 'I don't know what's wrong with that boy'

No, I am exaggerating a bit. He did chill out after a little while, but only gave very lacklustre half-smiles to the photographer who was leaping around like she was having some sort of fit. She said 'he doesn't smile at anything does he?' I take that as a sign of intelligence. Going to view the pics on saturday and DH can pick out his fav.

Your DH sounds just like mine. One success and he's bloody supermanny! If only they knew what it was really like!

Just popping in before bedtime (DS looking distinctly awake). He's 6 months today. Despite all the problems I'm still breastfeeding. He has fomula top-ups but mostly his feeds are bm ( apart from the odd bit of solid food on the floor). I question daily if I'm doing the right thing but still proud that we got this far. Sorry to hi-jack..

Congratulations Titania! You should be so proud of yourself.

Why are you apologising Titania? That's great isn't it?

Everyone lies about how their baby sleeps apart from us on here

Baby button's skin is a little better, thank goodness, though he had a real screaming fit tonight. So after I'd had him for an hour, dh comes along and takes him. 20 mins later, he's asleep. So, of course, dh starts the supermanny routine (lovin' that word)... what you need to do is a, b and c blah blah.

I said 'oooh, so you don't just take him from the person who's tired him out and settle him that way then?' I had a real look!

DS was def a singleton - three scans before 12 weeks showed that. Though I did have a large fibroid. Does that count?

Sorry. That was far more flippant than it was meant to be.

Interesting born - DS was a twin at a very early scan (around 6 weeks) but when we went back for a rescan there was only one heartbeat.

Awful night here. At the best point, he slept for almost 2hrs. Apart from that he's been awake every 20-40 mins. The bad thing about feeding lying down for us is his latch isn't brilliant on the right side so my nipple is feeling pretty shredded today. I want to cry already, and I've got a feeling DS has just created a poo explosion for me :(

My postnatal group are lovely but they don't seem to get it, one of them was complaining that her DD needs feeding 3 times overnight!