Lazily cut and pasted from the other thread but I thought you might like it.
OP for reference when you have DC
Best for baby/child in terms of health and development, according to many areas of research:
breastfeeding
having enough food of a high nutritional value, whatever the source
no TV
stimulation (not too much, not too little, and from the appropriate source)
no dummy/thumb
attachment
independence
a good relationship with grandparents who preferably live nearby
grandparents who do not undermine parents in any way
mum staying at home to nurture your child's development
mum working to show your child a good role model and have a good standard of living
exposure to lots of other children to increase confidence
small groups so your child feels secure
male role model
no exposure to any adults who may not be good role models
no exposure to smoke, car fumes, paint fumes, generally not city living
living in the city with access to a wide range of activities and opportunities
small school (with a family like feel and everyone knows each other)
large school (with a range of activities and choice of friends)
no junk food, chemicals, rotting teeth, obesity
everything in moderation otherwise they will have eating disorders
a regimented sleeping routine (children who don't get enough sleep go on to have all sorts of problems)
a relaxed approach to sleep (children who are left to cry go on to have all sorts of problems)
These are off the top of my head. So when you have achieved all of these things, get back to us.
I can understand why the idealistic side of you was a bit sad, but don't feel sad for her child, feel sad for your own children when you realise that with all the conflicting information you will get, you are unlikely to do the best for them in every area at all time. THAT is what we struggle with as parents, we shouldn't have to justlfy ourselves constantly. YABU.
BTW are you a female or non-female mother?