FFS this woman fancies herself as Jeremy Clarkson

[HarrietJones]

here

"Rudeness"??? And this from a person who thinks it is acceptable to call another woman a "knob"?? Hmmm. Spot the irony at all?

if instead of is in my second sentence. I posted too soon.

Why do you all assume that breastfeeding equals being shut at home all day. That is nonsense. I take my baby everywhere with me but do not feel the need to grandstand about feeding in public. If I am somewhere where there are lots of people eg in a restaurant, I move elsewhere. I also value my privacy, not just my baby's.

It's you who said that you never breastfeed in public.

rules of breast coverage nicked from another thread

northnorthwest - you are a delicate flower if 'knob' offends you.

The column we're discussing is not a pleasant commentary on anything - she talks about being 'confronted' by a breastfeeding class; she mocks the idea of a breastfeeding class; she laughs at the idea of a male lactation consultant (why?); she says she is 'squeamish' about 'bodily functions' - what, a small human being having lunch is worth that sort of response?...and so on.

A mild insulting epithet is far less rude than the column.

You are free to move elsewhere if you don't like bf where there are other people. Not doing so, and staying at the table, is not 'grandstanding' but simply deciding to meet a baby's need for food without a fuss. It's not always easy to move away anyway - you might have a pram, a toddler, heavens you might even have a friend or two you are socialising with...no need to move away!

But anyway, if you don't like the occasional 'knob' being thrown around in response to twattish behaviour, I can promise you, you will come over all faint and peculiar if you go elsewhere on mumsnet....'cos some posters can be very sweary indeed :) :) :)

Just to check, northnorthwest - you think breastfeeding in a restaurant is 'grandstanding' and that it's also the equivalent of changing your baby's nappy on the table?

You really think that?

Really?

northnorthwest I have to admit I don't really believe you when you say you are breastfeeding. I can't imagine anyone who breastfeeds their baby equating it with baby poo.

To liken her to JC though, is a bit - Clarkson is a dude!

Yes - belgo, I think it's a bit odd, too.

The 'breastfeeding = poo' argument is usually used by men, anyway....I don't think I've ever heard a mother use it, whether she was ff or bf. I mean, once you have a baby, any daftness like that just sounds stupid!

Are you for real, northnorthwest?

It makes me uncomfortable when people are so squeamish about their own bodies and its functions, what lurks there?

I wonder of she has ever done anything her body isn't, strictly speaking, designed to do

why do women view their bodies only as sex objects, I remember someone telling me she felt her boobs were for her partner
I expect she would be able to differentiate usage reasonably easily

Well, we use our hands to do any number of tasks. Heavens, we wipe our bums and our kids' bums with them (with the help of paper, natch).

We also use hands in sex.

This does not mean it is rude to see someone using their hands to write a letter, tie a shoelace, iron a pile of clothes etc etc etc etc.

I merely said that as well as needing to be fed my baby needs to be changed. I did not equate feeding with pooing. I don't really care what the article said. All I said was that I prefer to breastfeed my child discreetly. And the person who says she doesn't believe I am breastfeeding - how dare you! Just because my views don't fit in with yours. How patronising. I will continue NOT to breastfeed my son in full view of restaurant diners. For my sake, my son's sake and the diners' sake!!

If your boobs are for your partner whose are they when you're single?

If you are hiding your breastfeeding from me in a restaurant, what are you saving me from, northnorthwest?

I can breastfeed discretely at a restaurant table. Yesterday in a cafe with bfing friends, even they didn't notice my ds chomping away .

Northnorthwest you said you would not breastfeed at a table as neither would you change a nappy at a table. This really gives the impression that you think that breastfeeding is like a baby pooping. You say you want to give your baby privacy to feed - do you eat in private? Would you hide away feeding if you were using bottles?

northnorthwest - we can be forgiven for misunderstanding you, though, as you said "I was referring to the fact that, as well as feeding, my baby also produces natural waste - but that I would give my baby the privacy of dealing with that away from other people's eyes." In other words just as you give yourself and your baby the 'privacy' of not changing your baby's nappy 'on a table in a resturant' you would not feed in front of other diners, either.

Sounds like dealing with 'natural waste' is being used as a an equivelent, to me.

Of course it is perfectly reasonable for you to go somewhere clean and private to change your baby's nappy. There are hygiene issues here, for a start.

You are also free to prefer to bf away from other people, too - nothing wrong with that preference.

However, you are saying this should be everyone else's preference, too.

Because just as everyone's preference would be to change the baby away from the table in the restaurant, everyone's preference should be to bf away from view, too.

And that people who complain that they are 'squeamish' or embarrassed to see bf are justified!

And they are not.

Just to be clear, northnorthwest - you think no one should bf their baby in a public place, in view of others, is that right?

You have already explained this is not because you think bf is the equivalent of changing a nappy - though that is what it sounded like before.

Whatever - you don't really think that.

So.....why and why and why do you think no one should bf in a restaurant? It's nothing to do with poos and nappies. So what is it to do with?

Sex?

Shame?

It's got to be something really big and important, to make it so that you think anyone doing it is 'grandstanding' and that it should not be accepted.

Seeing as her first post on mn was to link to that article, I do find myself wondering if northnorthwest is the author of said article.

I never saw bf ds in public as "grandstanding". I saw it as feeding him when he was hungry. Most people weren't even aware I was feeding him - and if they were, there wasn't much to see. In the same way, I was not concerned about feeding him bottles (of EBM of course! :))

By northbynorthwest's analogy, restaurants are "grandstanding" as we can see each other, shock horror, eatiing . IN PUBLIC

NorthNorthWest, you hiding away whilst feeding your baby is actually helping to contribute to the idea of breastfeeding being seen as odd and abnormal and something to be hidden, ergo to be ashamed of.

Aw, lexxity, if someone wants privacy for their own reasons and comfort, we can't ask them to change their feelings.

What is objectionable is thinking that everyone should hide away!

Northnorthwest _ I suggested that you don't actually bf not because I hold different views to you, but I think that your views are incompatible with successful and happy bfing.

In my opinion, and I could be totally wrong, but I think the only reason you are saying you are bfing your second child is to give more credence to your views on bfing.\

Cosmosis, I wondered that.

NNW - I almost never BF in public simply because I'd prefer not to but I have absolutely no issue with somebody else choosing to do that. And every woman that I've seen out BF have always been incredibly discreet - you sometimes have to look twice to tell the difference between a feed and a cuddle.

I had been thinking that too Cosmosis but then you get the impression that the writer of the article would never contemplate bf-ing and northnorthwest apparently has (although only under the table or somewhere)

Out of curiosity northnorthwest, where do you bf if for example you were in a cafe or restaurant with you other dc/family/friends? I sometimes use bf-ing rooms in shopping centres if shopping on my own but only because ds takes aaaggggges over feeding and my local shopping centre provides big comfy sofas and I am too much of a cheap-skate to buy a coffee and use a cafe :)