Extended breastfeeding and your GP

[frannyf]

Just wondered if anyone else has had bizarre or interesting comments from their doctors or other health professionals. Ds is 2.5 and we both went to the doctor yesterday. I asked the gp if what he was prescribing was ok to take while breastfeeding, and he instead checked if it was safe to take while pregnant. He realised his mistake, said "Oops, sorry, you said breastfeeding," then did a double take, looked at ds, looked at my notes to see if I had another baby (nope), and just looked astonished! I laughed and said "Yes, we're still breastfeeding, I know it's a bit unusual," and he asked if ds was having solid food as well!! DS is a very tall, chunky, healthy toddler sitting in front of him by the way. I thought it was funny, but was also stunned that a doctor would be so ignorant about breastfed toddlers.

The other gp we see sometimes is the only medical person who has ever been supportive of my extended bfing. She is Muslim and says the Koran states you should bf for 2 years, but not many mothers manage it. She says I must have the constitution of an ox to keep it up (another load of nonsense, but at least complimentary nonsense!)

The health visitor at our clinic is the worst. Whenever we walk in, instead of saying hello, she calls out (across a crowded room of mothers with babies) "Still breastfeeding, are you?" Cue looks of horror.

LOL! It does indeed!

Which religion is that stitch? (Hope you don't mind me asking).

I explained to family planning doctor that coil was my only option "as I am breastfeeding".

When she took my medical history she asked about pg and birth and I said I had a 2.5 year old. She didn't bat an eyelid.

When I was in hospital with pneumonia I didn't talk about breastfeeding - as I wanted the drugs more (if he's been under 2 I would have asked all the questions). One of the nurses asked if I breastfed ds (which was rude and unneccesary) and I said "yes up until I was admitted actually". She said "I breastfed all mine for 3 years."

When I had an operation when ds was a year he was allowed to stay with me, and nobody said anything stupid, the anaesthetist talked to me sensibly about drugs and breastfeeding. None of this pump and dump rubbish.

BUT all the paediatricians ds has seen have said incredibly stupid, ill formed things about feeding past 6 months. Of all the medical professionals you would think they would know a bit more.

bobby, thats quite a medical history. hope you are well now?
beans, why would i mind? its islam.

Stitch - ds now cannot remember breastfeeding, once I was off the drugs and he asked for a "mummy drink" I let him have a go - he looked bemused, had a try, it was like he'd never done it before in his life. He looked up and said "maybe we'll try again later - but I would like some brown milk (chocolate) now". He's 2.5.

So just like the clingy argument I must refute the "can remember" argument.

That's only the half of it - I missed out the bit where drugs for mastitis killed off all my good bacteria and I was virtually faecally incontinent for a month with a 3 month old baby. Now that is yuk!

bobby????????
most people dont remember anything from before the age of three! some are even older. i know my fisrt memory is from when i was four. and even that is just a photgraph, as it were.

omg. i dont dare ask any more questions.......
just, how are you now?
why dont i ever realise my good fortune when i see it?

Are you still here stitchy-one?

I'm fine now thanks.

spidey, i went, honest..... just keep getting called back in.....

Hoorah that this thread has gone fluffy again now. It all got a bit hairy for a minute there.

I have read that your child would need to be nearer 4 before they could remember breastfeeding. Adults who can recollect it seem to remember it with fond thoughts rather than embarrassment. One sympathetic HV told me of her doctor friend who remembered his childhood in India, playing in a football match (age about 5), getting thirsty, running off the pitch for a quick breastfeed, then running back on to continue playing! Although quite funny, it sounded so wholesome and normal. Sadly I can't imagine that happening in the UK. (Stitch would be on the sidelines shouting "yuk" for one thing )

I hope ds can remember being breastfed, he enjoys it so much. I would rather he remembered that than the numerous times I seem to get annoyed with him recently!

no nono n o. ff, i would be on mn shouting yuk yuk yuk
in rl i am a real wimp. would either say nothing. or something along the lines of 'well done for keeping it going' etc

frannyf, I had tonsillitis when ds was 18 months and still having a feed at night (self-weaned at 2.5, dd is still having a feed night and morning at just 2). I saw a GP who looked and talked like Rosa Klebb and she was appalled when I requested a/bs compatible with breastfeeding. "good God, time to knock it on the head don't you think", she boomed. Vile, uninformed old bat.
I think you need to make a complaint about your HV. The GP just sounds like a wally

If you want to educate doctors, write to the Royal College of GPs, or the Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health. Or the British Medical Journal (all in London) - they carry one thought provoking/not clinical research piece in each issue IIRC. Would be a very positive thing to do, I think, but as I stopped when ds was 7 months to go back to work not really my place to do it.

BMJ is here

And editor's email is [email protected] (she's a woman btw - I mention this for use when you are addressing the email).

It challenges my innate prejudices to see / hear of breastfeeding toddlers and children.

I previously had a very long thread all about extended breastfeeding (I started it before I had DD because I had personal issues with the thought of going past the 4 months I had managed with DS). That thread got hairy at times, but it was always educational. Anyway partly thanks to that thread I made it to just under 11 months with DD .. but started to have the visceral reaction that it was more than enough.

So I am left with the over-riding inability to emotionally accept without inner revulsion the picture of bf'ing a toddler.

I think its a shame that those who do extended breastfeeding (I suppose I count as one) feel the need to clamp down on any reacion that is so emotional. There is a distinct pro-breastfeeding camp here that gets cross and loud and 'gang-upy' and tends to stifle any discussion that could lead to any change in heart. At heart I'm not surprised really because the lay of the land is totally different in RL so it must be refreshing having so much like-minded support

Anyhow just wanted to say that.

And I do, in case it is not clear, totally accept that it is absolutely none of my business how other people chose to feed their kids, I just feel it is sometimes a shame at how extended bf'ers sometimes put their points across on here .. because a previous discussion helped me jump a hurdle, and you could actually help others if they had the guts to 'take you on'

I feel the predjudices of which you speak are culturally learned rather than 'innate' Twiglett. I'm sure you'll be aware, from previous threads and the information supplied therein, that such 'prejudices' are confined to our Western society.

As someone who had bf'd three children beyond the age of two I am saddened and disturbed to learn that women like yourself feel 'inner revulsion' at seeing me feed my child.

Luckily I'm confident in myself but I worry that those who are less confident may be put off and affected by this sort of prejudice.

Eloquently put and interesting points raised,Twiglett.

That is ALL I am saying!

Thing is, Twiglett, I think a lot of the time, that reaction is put across as "yuck" or "how repugnant" or "that's child abuse" so perhaps you can't blame some of the more vocal extended breastfeeders for being so forthright about it?

I've only fed to 16 months (when DS self-weaned) so not as long as some by a very long way.

If those who felt so repelled by it could be a bit more open about why they feel that way, perhaps there would be more willingness to discuss it, rather than for women who do breastfeed longer than most to immediately be on the defensive because the initial reaction to what they're doing is so vile.

Btw, realise you've approached it in a reasoned and rational way - not attacking you!

You seen my ABM thread eh hunker???

I'm not "interested" in stitch's reactions in that she is entitled to her opinion as a private individual etc. I don't agree with her but respect her right to hold those views.
I AM interested in health professionals allowing their personal opinions and prejudices to spill over into the consulting room, Twig.
Frannyf's Health Visitor, who sparked this thread, is behaving disgracefully. My GP had no right to give me her own reactions to b/f an 18 month old. What she should have done is prescribed me with b/f compatible a/bs for tonsillitis, and kept her views to herself. That's what I was consulting her about.

Absolutely, Marina.

Edam, thank you for the link. Will be doing some emailing later, I think

Btw, in Romeo and Juliet the nurse says she breastfed Juliet until the age of 3 (wet-nurse) so it was obviously normal in 16th Century Verona. If that helps!