Spring is sprung, the grass is ris, I wonder where my toenails is - Due June 2010

[greensnail]

Ok, here it is ladies. Nice new thread for us all to enjoy

Your manager said whaaaaaat, Milly? Bloody hell's teeth, way to go on incentivising you to come back to work, eh? I'm not surprised you packed it in.

Deepest sympathies to you Mampam and LaT - I think a lot of people are short tempered/emotional anyway at this stage of pregnancy (I know I am....and so do my colleagues and husband after this week ) but when you combine that with lack of sleep the smallest irritations are going to make you want to rip limbs off someone. Do you find it fixes itself quite quickly if you can get one or two decent night's sleep?

Been cruising around looking at all your profile photos...folks, how are some of you old enough to have children? You all look really fresh faced and youthful. I'm not a great one for flashing myself around on t'internet (irrational old gimmer that I am) so you'll just have to imagine a cross between Gordon Brown and Nanette Newman. Although don't think about that too hard because it can conjure up a nasty mental image.

PlayFTSE I meant to say in my earlier message that I'm glad your husband has avoided the Road to Alimony. It's just astonishing that he even feels he can ask, quite frankly, but good that you've given him some, ummmm, clear boundaries around the issue .

Goodname holiday was OK, thanks, although I had a wierd weepy panic attack one morning (grrr bloody hormones) and managed to twist my knee when 'not skiing' . We were in Saint Martin de Belleville which is a very cute village at the bottom of the Val Thorens valley in Trois Vallee.

Milly - I've never bought a maternity bra in my life. As long as your normal bras are still comfortable they are totally unnecessary, and it's a myth that you can't wear underwires during pregnancy. I am however still in nursing bras because of feeding ds, so all a bit irrelevant for me this time!

The bear is very professional looking meggy!

Welcome back gizmo. Great news re your bloods.

LaT - for your friend. What a hard time she is having.

sunworshipper - the pic of me at 38+3 on my profile was when I was about to schlepp to central London for a night out with some friends. And with dd I travelled to a wedding 3 hours away at 36 weeks. So I would say keep on partying as long as you can, because your new baby will kurb such things for a while afterwards!

Oh dear - I have just eaten almost an entire 400g bag of roasted salted cashews. That's about 2000 cals worth .

DD got totally over-excited at the prospect of having a little brother while having a quiet five minutes on my knee wathing Peppa Pig today. I was explaining who Peppa's brother George is and how we're going to be a Mummy, Daddy, big sister and little brother and she was bouncing up and down on my knee and then flinging herself on my tummy giving the 'beebee' kisses. Ahhhh.

CSWS - I found maternity bras a waste of money last time too so I've gone straight into nursing bras this time. MAybe they'll see me through, maybe they won't but I got pg the month after I stopped bf DD and my chest size doesn't seem to have changed much as yet. I just needed something comfier then the old bras I had. I never got back into non-nursing bras either.

Beautiful dresses everyone!!

lat that's so cute, did you cry??!

mampam I really feel for you, you poor thing, it seems to just be one thing after another. I have to say i did laugh at your ds though, sorry, what the HELL am I going to do with 2 stinky boys?!?!

Was meant to have a mw appt today but after waiting an hour with ds in tow i gave up and rearranged for next week. Grrrr.

Oh LaT, that is so cute! Hope she carries on with the helpful attitude.

LaT - What your friend is going through is like my worst nightmare. Poor thing.

Mampam - Not funny for you at the time probably but you really made me laugh about your poor ds!! He sounds like my ds from the point of view of not being able to amuse himself and causing chaos! For me, it's like having a loyal little doggy who follows me around constantly, does everything at 100 mph (causing me a near-heart-attack every 5 minutes as he runs into everything) and makes a mess of everything. He's 3 and I was really hoping he might grow out of it by school age, but judging from your experience, possibly not! ...And nothing winds me up more than bad/dangerous drivers. I would be incensed! Sure the lack of sleep doesn't help in keeping calm. I resolutely sleep on my own now... can't see us ever sleeping together again really!! I also go to bed late, have a bath pretty much every night and sleep in a v. dark room. Don't know if this is why but I sleep really well. - still never feel like getting up in the morning though.

I've been trying to go to bed a bit earlier but my eyelid is still twitching ... really hope I don't end up with a permanent twitch as happened to your friend greensnail.

DP has banned 'one born every minute' without ever having seen it. This has made it even more of a forbidden fruit although I still haven't succumbed to it on iplayer - he always seems to be around! I'll wait 'til on maternity leave then watch them all at once.

Loving looking at your gorgeous dresses mampam and meggy.

Did anyone else see that programme about the 'worst forms of child labour' used on cocoa farms in West Africa? Unfortunately it hasn't made me feel quite guilty enough to stop gorging myself on chocolate. I really wish that it had!

hi all, haven't been around for a while; working is seriously killing me at the moment. Apologies for not addressing individual points - there is just too much going on for me to keep up with!

On the subject of partying to the end (cant remember who asked) I have a wedding in Leeds at 37 weeks and a wedding in Brighton at 38 weeks (we are in London). I intend to be at both, unless i am actually giving birth, but admit I am a bit nervous!

On another subject; my blood is already boiling at all these strikes, given I will be returning home from easter "up north" on the first day of the strike! I absolutely wont be cutting my trip short! No idea how I will get back!

anyone else going to be affected?

Hey gizmo, we stayed in St Martin a couple of years ago. Three valleys is prob. my favourite place to ski but thats not much use when you are pregnant. We went to les deux alpes in Jan and I had a couple of weepy attacks just cos I was left behind every day. Think it must be something to do with the altitude as well! Am currently planning next years hol while I still have time to think about it. Fancying switzerland for a change.

Is anyone else gettting too hot for sleeping at night? I sleep with no heating on and the window open, and its March in Scotland, and I am still too hot. Had to get up and put my feet in freezing cold water last night to cool down. Is this normal? Want to get the summer duvet out but DH is not so keen. Poor thing is currently sleeping in long sleeved tops and PJ's.

Tried One Born on the Channel 4 site last night but my computer is too rubbish. I saw about one jerky minute beforeI gave up but was already welling. It's confirmed my suspicion that the programme might help me get some of my nasties out. I even contemplated gring forward getting a new computer.

Chestnut - I know paid employment would be killing me by now, so sympathies. SAHMing is hard work but also of a different kind. I probably will be affected by the strikes but might be able to delay. I haven't really looked into the issues behind it but the union claim it's a question of safety. Hopefully they'll be able to thrash it out before then.

Minimoo - It must have been exhausting keeping DS entertained in a confined space for so long. I've done 30 minutes in the GP so many times I know arrive with no time to spare as I know I'll be kept waiting. Usually I'm an early bird. HAving said that, GP also never makes me feel rushed. I'd be pretty cross if I were you.

Goodname - I do get hot even though I like to be quite hot in bed. Not as bad as that,e h? Are you sure you're not trying to push DH onto the sofa bed? (bear in mind, my DH has been on ours for 5 months now!)

I've got 20-month old twin boys coming round to do painting with DD this afternoon. Their mum was telling me how she was too apprehensive to try it at home in case they ate it etc, so I thought the ratio of two mums to three toddlers was better odds, especailly as DD is pretty civilised about these things. She's usually so absorbed she doesn't get it everywhere. Must go and dig out brushes etc...

La Trucha - Good luck with the painting, sounds like a fun afternoon is in store

Goodname - I too am really hot at night & am getting really cross with dp now as he insists it's too early to change to the summer duvet.

I've been enjoying one born every minute, found this weeks a bit hard with the wee preemies though. I found dd's birth quite scary, originally because of all the unknowns & then after a long labour & no sign of distress she was delivered blue & rushed to scbu. I think although there has been lots of births shown needing urgent intervention, if anything I've found this reassuring I suppose because you see it all makes it less scary. Anyway I'm seriously waffling now & better go else I'll be late for my doctors appointment.

Everytime I look at the posts I lose track of all the things people have said and who said them so apologies that this is not directed at anyone specifically!

I am on a tight budget so have gone for nursing/maternity bras a size too big (having gone up one already) which are beginning to fill up quickly! I think these should suffice to the bitter end but who knows what will happen with the puppies closer to birth and I have duly noted what was said about afterwards!

Me and the other half are in the position where I am the only one earning at the mo due to his business not doing so well and I will only get SMP so we are panicking about him getting a job whilst I am off on maternity to pay the rent and bills as the SMP won't cover a thing. It may turn out that he becomes a full time dad once I go back to work as we can't afford childcare if he isn't earning much. My attitude is that we will work everything out but I am going to see how I feel physically and emotionally as this is our first, I have to open myself up to not knowing how I will feel rather than put pressure on myself to have a strict plan.

I find it disheartening when I read some of the posts about the negative experiences some of you have had with other mums being so judgemental about the decisions you have made about the work/stay at home issue. Women tend to be quite rotten to other women when it comes to questions of motherhood right at the time when I feel you are looking for support rather than judgment but everyone is entitled to their opinion. Please don't read this as a rant, it is an observation, I have no feelings one way or another, que sera sera

That said about our finances we are off to Whitby for a week tomorrow staying with friends who have been inviting us for years and we have never made it and I promised last year before we got preggers. I am looking forward to it, but not the driving, the other half can't but I intend to take it easy, we're not in any rush. I am looking forward to reading books, knitting, ice creams and one lunch at the Magpie cafe Hopefully the break will get us refreshed and motivated when we get back. My mum has been lovely and is giving us fuel money to get there and back we are very lucky with our families.

On a very much lighter note this should make you giggle, I had a mystery package arrive the other day, had a sticker on it saying 'competition winner'...I won....an ELECTRIC BREAST PUMP!! Haha! We did giggle about it and now there are no excuses for the other half to not help with night feeds How random is that! It was from another website ahem where I periodically go on and enter for baby bits and bobs with no expectation of actually winning anything! The kit got a good review on this website: mipump

Woah Perkster - congratulations on your big win Do you remember entering the competition? If your boobs will cooperate (unfortunately mine won't, being perfectly capable of distinguishing between a baby and nasty cold plastic) having a spare supply of milk is terribly handy: as you say, get your DH involved!

LaT I'm sure you're right that 'Oneborn' would get your nastys out....but I don't know whether it would help you find a way of dealing with them if they're really causing you some stress. As programme makers they have obviously decided to heighten the drama - of course they would - so there seems to be a disproportionate number of births where things don't go quite to plan. Perhaps if you have a look at the website, which lets you sort through clips, you might be able to get a feel for some of the more positive stories on there.

Goodname Yes, I did like St Martin, even though I was sulking a bit about skiing. In the end I got fed up and hired some kit on the Thursday, which made me feel better even though it was simply used for me to stand at the top of the learners' area and ski 50 meters down with DS2, before getting on the magic mat to come back up again. Still managed to twist my knee though! Having sternly told DS2 not to step off the mat half way up because he would have a big accident I, umm, tried to step off the mat half way up. Cue a slow, undignified collapse to the ground as one leg continued up the slope while the other stayed static, followed by stately progress up the belt, on my back like some giant, pregnant beetle, with all my limbs waving in the air

I took the skiis back to the shop a couple of hours later.

goodname I've had the summer duvet on all winter this year! Luckily DH also gets warm at night so it hasn't been an issue for us, but he's now on an air bed in the living room anyway!

perkster I think you're very wise to wait and see how you feel before you make any decisions on how you're going to work things after the birth. You may be surprised at how well you can cope on very little money. We had a similar situation during my first pregnancy when Dh was forced to go part time which reduced our income drastically. At the time it felt like a disaster, but we have learnt to live with what we have, and look at the positive side of the situation that he gets more time to spend with DD that he would otherwise. For what its worth, i've never encountered any negative comments about my choices about working.

I also wouldn't worry too much about driving to whitby. I have to do all the long distance driving too which isn't too bad - I find the worst bit is sitting still in the car, which would be the same if I was driving or being driven. Hope you have a great time.

I'm off to work in a bit. Hope I survive - my bedtime has been 9pm most nights this week so might be a bit of a shock to the system. Anyway, looking forward to tomorrow night when I'll have a hour less to work due to the clocks changing . Have a lovely weekend everyone.

meggymeg - I love the bear. Handmade gifts are absolutely the best thing! I had banned my family from purchasing anything until 28 weeks but my mum has been unable to resist knitting bears - we are on number 3 now and they make me smile each time I look at them. . My friend's sister knitted a bear for her that was terrible - arms and legs unequal and her DH chose the wool - dirty green, brown with bright red for the jumper - but that made it even more fantastic and her boy carried it everywhere!

perkster - we're in a similar boat. My DH is waiting for an interview to see if he will keep his job at the end of April. I'm fortunate to have maternity pay and although we'll have to tighten our belts I'm sure we'll manage. But it's not the money that stresses me - I know I'm being really selfish but I really wanted my 6 months maternity to be me and the baby. Of course I want DH to be involved and he will. I can't even explain rationally what my issue is.. I'm sure all will be fine, just wanted to moan.
Congratulations on your win ! A friend has given me a breast pump, but DH is freaked out that it has been on someone else's boob. I can't see the issue, is it me?

Oh - and people love to tell you what an awful person you are for going back to work - I have had so much stick for planning to go back at 6 months, some of which has come from people who don't have kids! Given that there are so many things to consider and that no two people have the same circumstances, I cannot believe people think they have a right to judge. Each to their own I say! Do what you think best and don't listen to the nay sayers!! Rant over

As regards being hot - our house is like an igloo - usually I have to wrap myself up on the sofa even when the heating is on. This year, no need for extra jumpers, heating has gone off and I am begging for the summer duvet. The phrase bun in the oven does seem rather appropriate!

Off to work now . Only 11 weeks to go and I won't miss the 6 day week!

Apologies for not replying to anyone specific, but the thread's gone crazy in the last couple of days!

I get hot. In fact apparently the other night I had no duvet on me at all, but I was still stealing all the duvet from DH and just bundling it in the middle of the bed so he was cold Maybe I did deserve the jab in the ribs to wake me up so he could get some back

I?m another one with a wedding at 37+3. It seems to be a bit of a theme for us all. Luckily this one?s only about 40 miles away, so not too far if we have to dash home. I looked at the links and the dresses look lovely, but I?m holding off and planning to get a maternity/ nursing one which I can wear after the birth (since it?s so close to the due date). But this linking business is dangerous- my parcel from Pumpkin Patch arrived this week- so thanks to whoever recommended them and their sale. I?ve got some gorgeous stuff (Although DH finds baby socks a bit ridiculous and can?t believe they?ll fit anything!)

I had my 28 week midwife check this week, and those of you who have to see phlebotomists to have blood taken really need to see my midwife. Not only was there no bruising, I didn?t even need a plaster Mind you, I did have a phone call half an hour later to say she?d forgotten to fill in the paperwork to go off with the sample, and could we run through some details But all is well with the bump, and I have a choice of antenatal classes, either April or May. I think I?ll go for the last 3 Saturdays in April though, as the end of May seems to be leaving it a bit late (plus we?re busy with weddings etc in May!)

Hope you all have a great weekend.

Those worrying about going back to work or getting comments, you it's as though you can't win.
My friend is a nurse and the earful she has had from patients/friends/colleagues about her NOT going back after the 2nd baby was staggering.
Apparently it's just fine to combine motherhood and full time employment if you're considered needed by everyone else as well as your children

Hi all, am going to sit down with a pen and paper tomorrow when I've got more time and go through the last few days of this thread and make notes. I cannot for the life of me remember things unless they are on the same page and I can flick up and refer to them .

So just a quicky for today......

Perkster we are in the same situation really re finances. Not the Christmas just gone but the one before DH had his overtime cut, this was worth at least £600 a month to us so it was hard, then in the January he had his hours cut to 24 per week,(because DH refused to participate in dodgy take and NI evasions....another story) so you can imagine how that took it's toll. To cut a long story short DH was bullied out of his job and now works self employed but it's very weather based so right now he only works 2 and a half days a week. We have been through the mill financially over the last year and I'm sure this added to DH's breakdown just before Christmas.

There's definitely something in the saying 'you don't know what you've got til it's gone'. It's very hard and at times seems hopeless when we've got bills coming from all directions and no money for food shopping etc. I think as soon as I'm able it will be me who will go to work full time, which will be easier as childcare in this area is pretty non-existant and that's why I work evenings. DH will carry on working part-time so he can do the school run etc.

Wanted to ask what you think of this....
our next door neighbour goes away about every 6 weeks or so, we don't really know her, only to say hello to. Last year when we got our cat she asked if we would feed hers when she went away and vice versa. We went away in September and asked her to feed ours but she said she was going away at the same time whether she did or not we don't know as she was there when we left and there when we got back.
Usually it is just for a weekend and over Christmas she asked us to feed the cat for 3 days. When she dropped the keys off it was 4 days and when we went to feed the cat there was a note saying she would be back on blah blah blah day which meant it was 6 days!

We've already fed her cat for a weekend once already this year and now she has gone away again. When she asked DH originally she said for 3 days, the key was posted through the door last night with a note saying she'll be back on Sunday 4th April

Don't get me wrong, I really don't mind feeding the cat but why doesn't she just say how long she's going for in the first place instead of doing it in a really sneaky, underhand way? I feel like she's really taking the p*ss now and am inclined next time she asks to tell her we're going away ourselves then! Would this annoy you or is it just me being grumpy, moody and hormonal?

barbeasty glad all is well, can you send those phlebotomists to see my MW too please? When she stuck the needle in my arm, blood was coming out of the hole and she only gave me a tissue to put on it afterwards and summoned me onto the couch. I took the tissue off my arm to help myself up and my arm starting pouring with blood to which she said "no keep the tissue on there and press really hard". No cotton wool, no plaster....nothing And I've been left with a bruise!

Hope everyone has a good weekend, we're meant to be having friends around this evening but DH has been up in the night being sick and has now got the runs, so he's obviously caught it off DS. Not sure it's a good idea to have people over into our germed environment! Plus our oven has just packed up and I can't seem to think of anything to cook just on the hob without the oven (except spag bol and stir fry)....answers on a postcard to mampam please ideas would be gratefully received.

Morning all,

i'm starting to feel like i being slowly cooked from the inside out at night now. Last night i was shoving the duvet off over DH's side i couldnt bear it near me.

I think its a tough and very personal decision whether to return to work after baby/babies. Everyone's finances is different and no one needs to feel judged by friends and family as to their own choice for their own family.
I'm SAHM and feel lucky to be one, of course it means DH and i have to be careful with what we do and spend wisely. Even now we know it means next year or 2 we will have to cut back(no forgeign hols etc) after #3 arrives.

I dread having blood tests/any needle really.
but the phlebotomist in my hopsital seems to be able to do it rather quick and painless and still dread it though.

mampam that neighbour is really taking the p* in future id say to her oh we can only help out for a day or 2 max from now on with new baby on way hosp appointments etc we are ever so busy.
Even my ILs put their pets: cat + dog in kennel/cattery if going away for 1 night.
RE Dinner: how about some sort of stew..lots of veg n beef in a huge pot simmering away for a few hours.

My weekend plans include lots of washing and then packing for our few days away from Monday. And tomorrow bringing kids to feed ducks(Seen as im feeling a bit more mobile after my physio other day.) and then dinner in ILs.

mampam - risotto, macaroni cheese, spag carbonara, shepherds pie (if you get both layers ready together then it doesn't really need to go in the oven), poached chicken and veg, sausage and mash, stew, a good old fry up - plenty of things really!

We took one of our layers of our duvet last night because I was getting too hot. My friend has also lent me her Dream Genie pillow so hopefully nights will be more comfortable.

Talking of looking after cats Mampam our neigbours dropped in this morning and asked if we could feed their cat for two weeks whilst they are away and switch their heating on the day before they get back etc. I don't mind because they are very appreciative, bring us lovely goodies from France and will reciprocate so would say that I think it's not what your neighbour is asking you to do but the way she goes about it, not being straight with you etc and then not reciprocating. She's actually just not being 'neighbourly'.

Mmmm,mmm just sitting here thinking what I can cook for my Mum tonight and Perkster has come up with the answers. Thank you!

Broke down in floods of tears yesterday cooking supper - god knows why. Just felt really emotional about having this baby, wanting to be ready for it and feeling a bit cut off from my family. Then my friend came around with all this lovely stuff to lend me for the baby - saving us a fortune - but it was her kindness that really moved me.

Sorry CWSW just realised that it was you who had saved my chef's bacon today. Thank you.

What a busy thread... it has taken me ages to catch up!

Gosh the SAHM / WOHM criticism is just awful. I really can't imagine how anyone can judge anyone else's "choices" - as very often they are NOT choices but necessities. You never know about other people's situations. e.g. I actually did intend to go back to work full time after DD was born, but as soon as I sent my letter advising of my return date they called me in and told me I was redundant! It was horrible both financially and for my confidence as well, and we've struggled ever since. I actually enjoy being a SAHM most of the time, but I'm not sure it's what I would have chosen.

Word of warning re buying equipment, especially buggies. We have just got our double buggy after ordering it ages ago, thinking we had plenty of time and were being a bit rash with buying it so early. When we picked it up the shop told us that they had had 12 on order but only 6 arrived! So 6 people have missed out, and they've been told there's no more arriving until August. We feel very lucky, but thought I'd mention it so people don't leave it too late to buy things.

My midwife is great at taking blood, hardly feel a thing and I did compliment her on it at the first appointment . Due Anti D jab in a week or so, so hope she's just as good with that...!

mampam Your neighbour sounds a bit strange. Why she needs to lie about how long she's going is anyone's guess. You are right to be p**d off and I would refuse next time.
Ponymum I agree - we've just bought an I-candy travel system and they report a 12 week delay on the carrycot - given how short a time they are in them, I would be very disappointed not to get it on time.

Reading the cooking suggestions, I need to go find food now....

Hi all! Haven't posted in ages for variety of reasons mainly cos I struggle to keep up with all your posts and then feel guilty for just updating rather than commenting

Anyway here goes with an update for anyone who can keep up! I'm 28weeks Tuesday and got midwife appointment morra. All's been good for ages now so think that's good. Starting to get very round and some things are starting to get more difficult to do but then guess that is normal too! I seem unable to wash dishes without soaking my belly which is now in the way and find it hard to get up off the sofa if I snuggle in to the corner of our suite like I used to! Generally though all is good.

Hope everyone else is doing well.

Update for stats though - my due date has been moved to 22.06.10 instead of 17th! But it is our first and it is a boy

Take care all and I'll pop in again soon to try to read some of the posts and hover in the background for a while.