February 2010: Babies have started arriving...

[woowa]

and here we are...who'll be next?

Bit of a rant alert....
I am totally furious and in no doubt who runs maternity units! For long and complicated reasons myself and the consultant had agreed on a date for a planned induction (very long story). Then I got a call from a busybody midwife yesterday and she basically vetoed it completely, both the date and the reason. The latter of which she wanted to interrogate me about... none of her flipping business as far as I am concerned if the consultant is happy with it! She demanded I drop off my notes for them to look at and I haven't heard anything since. What really gets me is that I can't even argue with the midwife team because they will be the ones delivering the baby... and I have enough experience of midwives making surprising mistakes (and then calling on the doctors to sort out the mess) to fear getting on the wrong side of them. What it means now probably is that I have to go in for labour on my own with my toddler for company as a birth partner (no kidding as dh going to be away and no family in this country!).
Okay, rant over and blood pressure probably sky high. Almost feel like throwing a spanner in the works now and demanding a home birth. They'd have to think of a very good reason to refuse me one, too, if they go by the medical facts of this pregnancy...

Morning all.

Bone-shatteringly tired today.. was awake most of the night. Am struggling to put a brave face on the day. I didn't take a walk yesterday as I had done so much the day before and my back was killing me all day yesterday (it's the top of my back across shoulder blades and under my rib cage that hurts the most) so DH and my mother, who is here, are saying it's my fault for not getting out.

Anyway, also went for possible sweep, but cervix is fully closed and not remotely ready to be opened manually or otherwise so that means another two weeks (max) of this. I also stayed in for an hours' monitoring as I said the baby often goes three or four hours without stirring - turns out she's just a bit of a sleepyhead as she was fighting fit throughout the monitoring session! I am greatly relieved though and don't mind waiting now that I know everything is ok - I just really, really don't want to go to the 15th and end up being induced!

COME ON BABY!

IC great that you are coming back to us, lovely to keep reading your news.

BabyG sounds a complete nightmare for you and I would be fuming too in your situation. I hate when professionals trample over you like that. I hope you get it sorted out.

You can say that again IC, an early arrival would have sent us into comeplete disarray! Would probably have ended up moving into my Mum's!! Also you're right about our missing regulars... just been looking at the due dates on the old thread, ktpie and raindroprhyme are due today, Devotion and Moth2 were due very recently... any news ladies?!

Nightmare giraffes - how utterly infuriating! Must admit I don't know how the politics of these things work, but is your consultant likely to be able to intervene on your behalf?

x-posted flying - sorry to hear you're feeling rubbish, hope you manage to get some R&R today and that things get moving for you soon!

Hi, thanks for the sympathy... feel better after ranting .
Must admit I find it hard to not be suspicious of midwives and their way of working. Maybe I should have discussed my first labour with someone (bit of a disaster but outcome was good)because I don't feel I can trust them... Ah well. This baby will come out one way or another and I can't wait to have a big cuddle

Good luck BabyGiraffes in getting the birth you want.

I'm having a quiet day today after yesterday's evening trip to IKEAland (which means 45 mins drive each way + the marathon supermarket sweep itself). As usual, has left me feeling a bit 'dirty', a bit annoyed at how, though everything is cheap you still end up spending loads of money and coming home with things you think 'did I really want that'? But hey, at least we have plenty of 'storage solutions'!!! And maybe the endless moving about of different bits and bobs in the house will finally come to a halt!

Good luck all.

Baby G how about contacting the Supervisor of Midwives, big stressful changes are not what you need right now and her job would be to look into what's really going on and why -then getting you the birth as close to what you want as possible. Plus there's still time to get your mind set at ease. Sympathies though, I nearly went completely do-lally when they kept changing my plans last week.

Fluffy great news about the building work, hope you can get all your nesting started very soon.

Flying sorry to hear you're having a bad day. I bet it has more to do with being pregnant and carrying around a baby than not going for a walk. Just do what your body tells you and chill if you need to.

My MIL has gone a bit odd over the last week or so . She has been offering to clean non stop for weeks but to be honest I'd rather do it myself - and things like the tall windows on ladders can wait. She is cleaning obsessed - I would never meet her standards- and over the weekend took a huff at the 'state' of our house. She is now waiting for us to call her and invite her to come clean . She's great most of the time but phew. My DH is her only child and she was also saying how excited she is to be getting a baby, how it's 25% hers... It upset me quite a lot especially after the stress fiasco that was last week. I simply cannot arrange now when she can get the baby to look after, it's a crazy thought. Anyone else having MIL problems?

Yikes sunnybump your MIL sounds a bit full-on! Mine is 400 miles away (sometimes a blessing, sometimes a curse!)so she hasn't been able to get as involved as she would have liked, but I have had similar issues with my Nan of all people - she was trying to insist that she should wash all of the baby clothes and blankets etc as there was "no way I would have time" and that I must tell her the minute the baby arrives because she wants to be straight round and be "very involved" with her great-grandchild... I'm relying on my mother to restrain her (physically if necessary). Do you think your DH would have a quiet word with her? Blokes are not very good at fronting up to their Mummies are they?!

sunnybump it is totally crazy to be arranging now when MIL gets to look after baby! Mine offered yestereday too. I thought um, let's wait for it to be born, shall we... But you know they only mean the best. As for the cleaning... why not just say yes?! OK you'd rather do it yourself, but you have SOMEOONE OFFERING TO CLEAN YOUR HOUSE! Speaking as someone who is paying for a cleaner to clean her bathroom as I write... I would jump at the chance.

flyingcloud I can only heartily sympathise, sleeplessness is the bane of my life right now. Don't listen to DH and mum saying that it's because you didn't get out for a walk. It could be for any reason, but who needs a reason, you are nearly ready to give birth and the mind and body play cruel tricks. You have to listen to your body and if it says rest, then rest! Can you take a nap today? My afternoon naps are my saving grace.

BabyGiraffes can the MW just change your plans like that? Doesn't consultant outrank MW? Clearly they can't change your induction date to when your DH is out of the country - madness. Can you speak to consultant about it?

GF I believe it is your induction today! Good luck, and can't wait to hear the news.

Dorinda I'm so with you on visitors calling before dropping in. Surely they will?!

westlondongirl shame you didn't get the news you wanted at your scan. It could still move up...?

Fluffy great news on the house and the sudden blooming! About time eh

Chin up threeplusone not long to go now, I'm sure the first EDD is the more accurate.

stoofadoof commiserations on the toothache. Off to the dentist with you!

As for me, I have thrush, AGAIN That is the other reason I would like this baby to arrive, I have never had so much thrush in my life. Ooh, the itching

Sorry to all those feeling sleepy and weepy. I feel exactly the same and am fed up of being pg and in pain with SPD. Then I feel guilty that I want this baby to come out now at 38 weeks...

I also have MIL issues. Mine is great most of the time (has DD one day a week and for regular sleepovers) but just doesn't appreciate where the line is, even though DH has explained it to her many many times. When I went away last week, she decided to come over (she has keys so she can let herself in when she brings DD back if one of us isn't here), but didn't ask beforehand or leave a note. So we got back to the strange sensation that someone has been in the house, and kept finding annoying things that she had done (like emptying the dishwasher and putting everything away in bizarre places, putting out the compost but washing the containers really badly so they all had to be done again). I know she means well and is just trying to help, but we have said so many times that she needs to call beforehand to check it's OK, and to leave a note saying what she has done so it doesn't freak us out (we have been burgled in the past), but she seems unable to remember to do either of these things because, in her words, she is being a "helpful fairy".

In the past, she has taken it upon herself to come round and clean, move furniture round, do our laundry and make our bed. She was very surprised when we weren't delighted at her help. The irony is that our house is always much cleaner and tidier than hers anyway!

Ooh, sorry at massive rant. It just drives me mad that she can't respect our requests for her to call beforehand and leave a note when she has been.

Oh it's so good to get it out of my system, thanks for listening.

Fizi I can totally see your point, but she really does have unbelievably high standards, and from past experience I know she will come round a week later and cry because it's not been kept exactly like she left it and then the emotional guilt trips start. This is our home and we keep it clean and cosy - but we also live in it. But yes, if it came with no head games I'd love someone to come and clean!

DH has had a chat with her, didn't go well. I'm sure she'll calm down soon.

Watercress it can be a nightmare eh, not all the time by any means but when the lines crossed it's so hard.

My Dad on the other hand is so laid back he's practically sleeping and sometimes doesn't even seem interested, lol.

On the positive side, I've just collected a huge black bag of baby boy clothes from a lovely lady off freecycle. They're in such good condition and so cute, so am sorting them out into sizes before I get washing!

My cat has what we call his "alarmed face", when ears go back and eyes go wide. I swear I must have looked just like him when my MIL started talking about babysitting, and looking after LO when I am away...when I was 6 months pregnant. She lives 200 miles away, so it's not like she can pop round to babysit. In my head I was going "rather leave it with my parents thanks." I know we all know that MILs are wonderful, love their sons and want to help us and be involved in their grandchildren's lives. But WHY WHY WHY do we often find it so hard? I was lying awake last night wondering why the MIL relationship is SO much harder when children are born. Anyone enlighten me? I used to love my MIL, but since being PG i can't bear her. I'm sure she's not being any different...

sigh.

didn't feel LO move for about 12 hours...but has recently started wriggling on bladder and kicking in ribs again. Such a relief. I was starting to think about going down to the hospital to check. Keep moving baby. Am now 38+5 and quite happy for baby to arrive NOW!

off to tidy, new friend (hopefully!) from antenatal class coming round, mustn't look like slob.

Today was my induction day!

DH and I arrived at 8am at the maternity ward as planned and realized that they were pretty busy (all the beds were full). We'll were put onto the observation berth and waited for a mw for about 40mn.

i was then put onto the monitor to register LO an my contractions and after 20mn, the mw came back and said that the obstetrician will come to discuss with us.

The obstetrician told us that they'll not be able to induce me today as they were full (2 in delivery room and 2 in pre labour) and they will not be able to give the care I need if they were to do it today (because of my health, I'm classified as high risk).

So I'm due back tomorrow where they hope they will be able to induce me and provide the staff/care needed.

In one hand I'm gutted as I was psychologically ready to be induced today but in the other hand I do understand that it is best to adjourn it until tomorrow to make sure everything goes smoothly

Sorry for the long post and I hope you're all feeling fine/better/rested

Oh GF so sorry you're going to have to wait another day in latent labour limbo. Do you think you will be able to get any rest?

Lol at woowa - picturing Puss in Boots from Shrek, doing the cute face with huge eyes!

Oh GF sorry to hear about your disappointing morning! Definitely better to be safe though - and you'll be cuddling that little baby in no time!! x

Oh thanks everyone - really I am fine and compared to the rest of you I don't feel I deserve any sympathy.

I had a reflexology session this morning and it was sooo relaxing, definitely worth it. I am booked in again for next week.

fluffy you have done well to put up with building work- I can work myself up into a tearful state just when I see the dirty dogs come in and track their muddy paws across my clean kitchen floor - poor DH has been cleaning the floor non-stop at my insistence although now I am going to take up doing it on a daily basis again as my gynae said lots of housework might help move baby along!!

sunny my mil is similarly clean-freakish (she's a nurse, so has much higher standards than me) luckily she's 500km away. My mother is here and she is the opposite, bless her, she keeps offering to clean, but leaves a messy trail in her wake! Although watercress your MIL does sound a bit odd (although with the very best of intentions!)

Someone mentioned about Devotion - I think I spotted her on the January thread as her due date changed, haven't heard though.

fizi sorry to hear about your thrush, what a nightmare for you.

GF ooh, I can't imagine how tough that must be, being made to go home again, but as you say, for the right reasons hopefully and it will work out for the best.

woowa - I really freaked myself out with lack of lo's movements and that is why the doc sent me for monitoring. The midwife told me ten in 24 hours is enough. I did start to worry as she just seemed to go longer and longer without moving. I have to say, seeing the heart beat and hearing the midwife say reassuringly that all was well has really put my mind at rest.

Right I really am quite sleepy now and may go for a little lie-down. I just re-read my post and it makes very little sense!

Hi everyone,

Congrats jardins, lucky you meeting your LO! Great name by the way...

GF that must have been really hard but better the hospital had the foresight to put you off a day, and not try and fit you in under stressful circumstances. Good luck tomorrow...

IC glad you are working out the whole motherhood, feeding thing, I am still not sure I'll know what to do when LO arrives despite the NCT classes and the books...

On the MIL front, my DP's mum died a few years ago which was really sad, and I think he's really missing her now that we're starting a family as he really would have liked to have shared it all with her. And although I have had a MIL before in a long previous relationship, I wish she was around! I think my mum is secretly pleased not to have to compete with my MIL as she has a terrible relationship with my sister's MIL and they spend the whole time trying to outdo each other - it drives my sister spare!!!

I am at work sipping RL tea (shirking from home!) and trying to do pelvic floor exercises at the same time. I'm starting to find sitting at my computer really uncomfortable - my last day is my EDD... which is February 25th!!! luckily I no longer have to commute in but still my brain is pretty fried!

It is hard when people aren't around to share it Abs, my Mum died when I was 19 so I never got to ask her all the baby questions,but at least I'm not still grieving with these crazy hormones. Have you tried a birth/ yoga/ exercise ball at the PC, sometimes it's the only thing I can sit on with any amount of comfort so worth a try. Mine was a fiver in asda.

Flying I wish there was one of those empathy belly suits available to do the rounds when people are insensitive and decide they know just what you need. A nap sounds like a grand idea.

Thanks Sunnybump, I'm sorry about your mum, my DP's mum died a while ago and he has come to terms with it, but as I'm sure you know, there are obvious events that trigger overwhelming sadness.

I know what you mean about the hormones, what a roller coaster! I bloody cried during the Simon Cowell song for Haiti this morning on the news, and I hate Simon Cowell, I felt like such an idiot!

Yes I have a yoga ball in my office which I jump on occasionally... My desk is too high to sit on it while working though... I just need to get up more frequently which is hard when they seem to be bombarding me with work!

Sorry to hear people are having MIL problems - always a tricky situation to handle and someone always ends up getting upset.

I've had the most glorious day. I finnished work on Friday and DH had bought me a pamper day for Christmas, so I booked it for today. This morning i got up, walked the dog for 40 mins and drove to a lovely hotel in the country. I spent an hour in the gym, an hour in the pool (including a quick sit on the edge of the jacquzzi with my feet submerged!), a relaxed lunch, then a facial and an indian head massage. I'm now back home feeling very relaxed. We're getting fish and chips in as a treat tonight, before heading out to NCT class. Not a bad way to spend the day waiting for bump to arrive. I'm trying to make the most of it before the 'bundle of joy' turns our life around!

Hope everyone is finding a little time to relax as well.

GF - good luck tomorrow.

Oh scooby that makes me so envious! I'd love a pamper day. I'm going to aquanatal tomorrow, but that's not quite the same!! Maybe I'll look on my coming waterbirth as a spa day. Probably a similar experience, no?

flyingcloud my MIL was also a nurse and she has an overwhelming desire to clean my house too, to very high standards. However, DH and I have decided to get a cleaner, just a couple of hours a week. I hope that will make MIL's visits less stressful for me as I won't feel like all she can see is dust! Interestingly, my mum is "supernurse" and yet has no desire to clean anyone's house, not hers or mine! I find this much more relaxing!! And i've inherited her lack of cleaning gene.

You also have my sympathy with the dogprints. We have 2 cats who LOVE putting their feet on everything. One won't clean himself until he's walked across me or a sofa, and we can't seem to change that habit. He's been very badly brought up!

Right, what's for dinner?

oh, and meant to say to GF, oh bananas. Glad you're able to see the benefit, but it must be so hard - you thought you might see your LO today, and have to repsych yourself for tomorrow.

ooh - and just noticed the new emoticon. Is it new? I like it!

Just a quick hello and to let you know I had a baby boy yesterday afternoon, 9lbs 7oz. 14 hour labour, irregular contractions again, lots of stitches! Back home now. Will update you all properly when I get chance.

Oooh Ktpie huge congrats and a good size too, hope you recover from your stitches quickly....

ktpie Congratulations - the 1st February baby (I think?)