Due March 2010 - do I look pregnant yet or just fat?

[annamama]

... starting a new thread as the old one was running out of space ...

Arcadie, I forgot to ask, how do I join the Facebook group?

It's my birthday!

DH bought me a voucher for some indulgence at a local spa - torn between the 'mum to be' or a Indian Head massage.

I think Anya has used the wrong list... here's the updated one...

The 11th is looking like a busy day!

Becky7000 15 February #4
Smac 25 February #2
DrSkid 22nd February #3
pureeandpearls 26 February #2
Tigresswoods 2 March #1
Donttrythisathome EDD 1 March #1
Potpourri 1 March #4
onlyanauntie 1 March #1
369thegoosedrankwine 1 March #2
MissieMoosMummy 1 March #2
cyphercat EDD 2 March #2
Caitni EDD 2 March #1
Horsiemummy 2 March #2
Oscarsmumm 2 March #2
Pipsonhisway 2 March #1
sarahmikeharryandrosie 3 March #3
BlueyDragon 3 March #2
TakeLovingChances 5 March #1
hecklephone 5 March #2
Dalrymps 6 March #2
Scooby26 6 March #1
Iwonka 6 March #1
Twofalls 7 March #2
Carrie2010 7 March #1
MandaHugNKiss 7 March #3
BYM 5 March #2
ilgb 9 March #2
Sariska 9 March #2
rebeccacad 9 March #1
therubyslippers 9 March #1
Summer2010 10 March #1
Anya4 11 March #4
wilkos 11 March #2
Lemonadegirl 11 March #2
PacificDogwood 11 March #4
BulletProofMum 11 March #3
itwascertainlyasurprise 11 March #1
Minicooper 11 March #2
Josie22 12 March #1
Swingsofglory 12 March #2
Vixie123 13 March #1
Walnut8 13 March #1
slackrunner 14 March #2
Poppyjen 15 March #1
Annamama 15 March #2
Retromum 15 March #2
Childofthe80s 16 March #1
mmtwgr 16 March #2
Scootergrrrl 17 March (??) #3
SleepWhenImDead 18 March #2
PixieOnaLeaf 18 March #4&#5
Kay1980 18 March #2
designerbaby 19 March #2
Luckysalem 22 March #2
Veryworriedme 22 March #1
Betterbitofbutter 23 March #2
Easydoesit 24 march #2
Rindercella 24 March #2
Arcadie 26 March #3
Fleximum 28 March #3

Happy Birthday BPM hope you enjoy your spa break - v jealous

I think I felt the baby move too last night!
It was just one short jerk. But I'm pretty sure it couldn't have been anything else.

Heckle - try telling your DH that you really want it to be him who gives you the special news "It's a ... !" rather than a sonographer. Also you've had the experience of knowing last time, this time you want a different experience. See I'm good at arguing a point even though I don't agree! We are both far too curious to let it be a surprise...

Becky - it would be a bit devious of you to find out without telling your DH that you know... but I'd probably do that! Just be careful so you don't let it slip.

Minicooper - that's a bit late for the second scan isn't it? I thought they want to keep it around 20 weeks. Ours is at 21+ weeks but only because we're in Florida for 3 weeks (can't come home earlier cuz of a Bar Mitzvah...). Anyway, maybe you should see if you can get an earlier appointment?

LouBudd - that's definitely not right about the MW! You should ask to change MW. Or at least get another appointment to have your urine and baby's heartbeat checked. Urine is quite important as it will pick up on infection, diabetes, etc.

Sariska - me too, I was glued to pregnancy book first time around, but not so much now...

Iwonka - hope you feel better soon! Are your iron levels a bit low, maybe that's making you tired? I understand you're still worried, it's hard not to, isn't it. Even though it's most likely that's all is ok! Yes I would go back to the clinic if I was you! I wish we had gone there for the 12 weeks scan and not the NHS... "Nasal bone? We have not been told to look for a nasal bone." Apparently they can look for certain things at the 20 week scan but not sure if the NHS does that. How much is a scan at FMC, do you know?

Happy birthday BPM! Were you on this thread before or are you a "new joiner"?

Hello everyone,

BPM - Happy Birthday!!! Hope you have a great day.

Annamama - my iron levels were checked during the first MW appoint and everything was fine. I am seeing her again tomorrow so I will ask about it. It probably has something to do with the worries that keep invading my mind. Hence also the lack of sleep. The 1st scan I went for was 150, the one at 20 weeks is supposed to be 200. I know it's A LOT but when I think about the stress it can save me from, I think it's money well spent. Could you tell me what the quadruple test was like? What do they check for exactly?

Is anyone else feeling the baby move?

Link to Barts quadruple test here Call the number if you wanna do it, they will send you a "kit", you get your GP/nurse/flubotomist (sp!) to take the blood, then you send it by special delivery yourself. Send it Mon-Thu, not Fri. I got results by phone same day as they received it. It costs £80. I'm not sure how reliable it is, but I think it's better than the early bloods...

My positive thought of the day is: At least my cold is preventing me from smelling DD's dirty nappies with full intensity!

loubudd as arcadie mentions, you'll see a midwife (albeit super-briefly!) at your 20 weeks scan and then as I seem to recall, you go to your GP for your 24 week appointment (I assume you're having shared care and that's why midwife doesn't want to see you until 28 weeks).

She's rubbish naughty (we'll give benefit of the doubt, maybe having a bad day) for not making that clear to you - do you have a section in your notes that was filled in at booking that tells you what week you see whom? Take a quick look, it may all be written down but goodness knows its not exactly difficult for the mw to elaborate on why you won't see her until 28 weeks and avoid anxiety/confusion!

Thanks everyone for your commiserations! Not sure that's the right word, exactly, but such a show of support is heartening. Tbh, it's no where near as difficult now as it was (although it's certainly not simple/easy) but I'm fairly philosophical about it most of the time - I picked a wrong 'un, as it were(well, I was only 20), and have to do my best now! I forget who said it, but 'ain't that the truth' when you try so hard to not repeat mistakes you've witnessed/lived before and you end up making a whole new bunch!?

We're all of human, none of us perfect... so long as (for the most part) we try to do the best we can I think we're on the right track.

ICWAS I know I'm just a username on the screen right now, but I really do empathise with where you are and how you're thinking you'd like to proceed. I really hope things work out if that's the way it goes. Either way you are a strong woman, you can do this, either with him, or 'alone' and I'm/we're here for moral support/advice/join you in tears. xxx

Manda - it was me who said it! In my case my mum had a father who couldn't give a toss about her. Therefore she tried for years to stay together with my dad even though they were miserable together, and made us miserable too... just because she thought we needed a dad around. Happiest day of my teenage years was the day they told us they were getting divorced! It's not easy to do the right thing... (I have forgiven her). And I get on great with my dad now.

Morning ladies

Am now back from my holidays and am 18 weeks today - jet lag has me wrecked today! I haven't been on in nearly three weeks and it's taken me ages to catch up on people's news . Such a lovely bunch of ladies on here though

Pixie more belated congrats from me on your news. Glad it's sinking in, it must have been such a surprise.

BPM happy birthday! Have a lovely time at the spa (major from me).

Waves to everyone else.

I had a great time in the States but I had a bad bout of sciatica that seems to be recurring...never had any back problems before and it's a killer . Still, am now feeling the first tiny movements which makes it all worthwhile .

Hello all, sorry not been on for a couple of days,

Happy birthday BPM, hope you have a fab day xxxx

re finding out the sex- when pg with DD my dh didn't want to know so i agreed,but at the 20 week scan i was asked to return 2 weeks later as baby was in an awkward position and she could not check the heart properly, DH told me there was no point in loosing the time from work again as he had seen baby earlier etc- i was upset that he didn't seem interested and told him i would find ou the sex if i went alone- he replied u would not dare!!!!(never dare me!!)lol anyway took my best mate and we found out it was a baby girl!!!! i was elated as we had DS already- got home and told dh all was fine and i knew did he want to know? Reply- no followed by much sulking,

Anyhow, we agreed he would not go in nursery etc as he still wanted a surprise, at about 8 mths we went out to dinner and ds was getting bored, i sent dh out to the car to collect the new book we had bought him and inside the bag was a pink blanket(i had totally forgotten it was there) dh came in and shoved it on the table and said- "i take it i am having a daughter then!!!!" followed by the biggest grin i have ever seen cross his face!!!!! needless to say this time we will find out together but it was so hard to keep it quiet- although everyone knew except him!!!!)

sorry about the ramble !!!!

welcome back Caitni- i too get the scaitica down my butt cheek and leg its awful¬!!!! hope you recover from the jet lag soon xxx

thanks for the birthday greetings...

Not a new joiner just decided to change my name (pka dophus).

It is also my Mums b-day and her father's (now deceased).

We've decided not find out the sex. We didn't with either of the boys but more tempted this time.

Forgot to say Happy Birthday BPM! Oooh, you're one of those 'into every generation, we get a child bon on the same day' people! If only your mum would have placed a bet that that would be when you'd arrive. Enjoy your treat whichever one you choose (I don't like Indian head massage after a weird experience with it so I know which I'd pick )

annamama sorry I couldn't remember it was you, but you're wise indeed

I never did congratulate you, Pixie on your double the fun news! I always thought it would be perfect to have twins until I had DD and then I realised I was insane. That said, she was my first, I was young, inexperienced and slightly neurotic... I feel I'd cope much better with twins if I were to fall for them now. How are you feeling about the wole situ and do you have support network to help you?

Incidently, are they fraternal?

Hmm, eating a lovely pasta/chicken salad thingy from Marks for lunch. Maybe it'll give me some energy although I suspect I'm so kaflumped because I usually sleep on my stomach and that's just become impossible the last week or so. As a result, I spend most of the night huffing an puffing whilst I try and find a position I might drop off in. I blame the government and their 'put baby to sleep on their front' advice that was prevelant when I was born. Not only were they trying to kill me but also condemning me to sleepness nights when pregnant myself. Gee, thanks, Mr Heath et al :p

Hi Ladies - Happy birthday BPM. Go for the Mum to be massage - I heard you shouldn't do Indian Head stuff when you're pregnant ( although maybe that's a bit like shouldn't eat Peanuts - just a little over sensitive!)

SarahMikeetcetc LOVE how you let it slip to DH!! Great story!

Iwonka Go to facebook. Go down to the bottom left hand corner and you'll find two blue people. That's your groups button. Type MN March 2010 into the search box. Request to join. When I (or Rindercella) next log on we'll confirm your request. I keep posting a log of whos RL name matches whose MN name so you can nosey at us all properly!!! I'm the incredibly beautiful young looking one.....

Thanks for all your replies.
I called the community midwifes office today which is a t my local hospital and they told me that there was no need to check my urine cause they did it at booking in(ridiculous I think) and we don't see a midwife at the 20 week scan here and no doctors appointment in between. She implied that it would be ridiculous to be seen before 28 weeks. I feel really let down and am contemplating paying for a private midwife. Anything could happen to you or baby within 3 months. I don't think it should matter whether it's your 1st or your 5th baby, you should be treated exactly the same. I'm sure it's another cost cutting exercise. Hope nobody else is experiencing the same problems. xx

LouBudd That's atrocious. Not everyone recognises warning signs of stuff like pre eclampsia or poly hydroamniwhatsit which is WHY you need regular(ish) checks. It's not good enough to say - come if you think there's a problem. I had a text book pregnancy 2nd time round but still got aneamic and wouldn't have thought to go to the MW to say - I feel knackered all the time and I'm getting headaches. That's why they do blood tests....

3 months is a stupid amount of time to make you wait. If you can afford it go with a private midwife - esp if you'd consider homebirthing. I'm all for the NHS making sensible cuts to keep afloat but no prenatal care for 3 months is just... atrocious.

Makes me feel a lot better about my community NHS midwife who I'd always thought was a bit on the rubbish side until now!

Think it depends on your local PCT. I live in Worthing, West Sussex. I don't know about everyone else. I am thinking of complaining to our local pct. I think maternity services are getting worse and I don't believe it's the fault of the midwives. It is the big wigs at the top cutting costs in the wrong places. I'm now on a mission.

Caitni - welcome back! Jet lag sucks... Where in the States did you go? We're going to Florida for 3 weeks soon. (DH is american)

LouBudd - yes go private! If you can afford it, why not. Ridiculous...

Funny story Sarah - I take it he wasn't angry at finding out then (phew)...

Aha BPM, mystery solved!

IWCAS - good luck with the trying again!

Pixie - just make sure you treat the twins as individuals whether they're identical or not! My dad loves his identical twin, but is sometimes a bit resentful of the fact that it was always just "the twins"... There were some perks though such as girlfriend swapping! Will you breastfeed? It must be hard to do that exclusively... but I guess that's why we were given 2 boobs.

Pixie I knew ident twins called Natalie and Natasha. The kids at their primary school either just called them Nat or Twin cos they couldn't be -arsed-- to tell them apart.

A good mate has ident twin girls and dresses them almost the same but with one major diff each day ie. N has the pink tights but K has the white ones so that once you've established which is which you have a "handle" on telling them apart.

Another friend with twin boys bought nigh on matching clothes but one boy always had something red on and the other always something blue. Easy to remember Dan= Red ( 3 letters) Matthyoooooo = Bloooo.

With both sets I think it really helped them to maintain their own individuality. It must be horrible having someone constantly call you by your sister's name.

And the "at your age" thing. I presume if you're still capable of getting pregnant naturally then your body still thinks you're capable of feeding them. Have no official data or experience to back it up - just a gut feeling that God knew what he was doing putting the menopause at the age he did.

Wow. Mammoth post. Will go and bond watch Waybuloo with the kids.