Right. DH started what he refers to as his 'daddy issues' counselling today, after a 4 month referral time (& after she'd got the correct records up, having found others for a man with the same name, who is 38 years old, despite 2 referrals for DH to her, & didn't even realise that it wasn't 22 year old DH until things started not making sense?!)
After an hour with him, she's diagnosed him with 'attachment issues' (apparently he's unable to bond with George ) & 'anxiety' (because he's worried that he's unable to bond with George ).
I'm not professionally qualified, but I think that it's unusual to give a diagnosis so quickly (especially given the amount of time she spent talking to him about relevant things - more on this later), but it's complete bollocks! Right now he's holding George & gazing at him lovingly. I don't remember the last time that all 3 of us were in the same room at the same time & I got his full attention - he's always staring at / playing with / laughing at the silly faces of our son. To say that they've not bonded is totally ridiculous. Bearing in mind this woman's never met any of us before & has never seen him with George. DH also doesn't feel that he's having a difficulty bonding at all, although he says he does worry that he'll let George down & be a bad father. In my opinion, he does worry about that an unhealthy amount - but that only serves to make him more attentive, which undoes the other point!
So asides from those ridiculous assumptions, the counsellor spent more time talking about irrelevant crap than anything to do with what he's meant to be getting counselling on. This included (but was not by any means limited to ) her asking for a detailed account of his knowledge of which benefits we're entitled to, finding me lots of information about support groups in the area (I can do that myself & am already part of an NCT group, for a start!) & suggesting that we move in with other students so as to 'form relationships with our peers'?!?!?! I don't have any local 'peers' with whom I'm friendly, but he does. & he's the one she's dealing with! & why would we, as a married couple & a baby, want to move in with a bunch of stupid, drunken, immature students on the basis of our educational status? We have a lovely two-bedroomed flat & are very happy here.
She also apparently asked, totally out of the blue, if I was drinking enough water. Because, of course, my current levels of hydration are completely related to past traumas in DH's life. She also seemed obsessed by the amount of time we've been together & left DH with the impression that she feels that we'd be better off getting a divorce. Or at least that he'd be happier getting a divorce. Whichever one. After all, we all know that being together for just over a year before your baby arrives means that there's absolutely no chance of your marriage working at all. No. Not a hope in hell.
I'm absolutely fuming & can't believe how unprofessional she seems to have been. Either he's spouted a load of crap at her & she's made what appear to be reasonable leaps from that (which I doubt - he seems quite shocked & annoyed at her as well, although not as much!), or she's completely out of line.
How dare she ignore what he's asking for help with & instead make harmful suggestions about our marriage & the circumstances in which we conduct that marriage, & butt her nose not only into his irrelevant personal affairs but mine?!
AIBU? Am I just being over-sensitive & defensive? Is it just hormones / sleep deprivation? Or is she being actually quite unprofessional?
I'm quite tempted to go & see her & ask if there's anything else she'd like to ask about me so she can get on with what she's meant to be doing, but I'm sure that I'd only get a special tick in the 'overbearing wife' box, so will leave it. I'm distinctly unimpressed, though.