Due April 2009: Episode 19 - We had sex in July!! The curse of the slummy mummy!!

[SmuttyNuttyTaff]

so the orgy thread begins

My cousin actually has a chocolate factory!! For real!!

NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO body paint is Baaaaaaaaaddddddd that way trouble lies or possible sticky situations

ooooohhhh Boffin how cool!!

Nutty have just emailed you his link.

Boffin - thanks

right must go to bed.

DH has his driving test tommorow

Nighty Night xxx

Off to bed now as there is no fruit smut and no more dwarf jokes.

Night night xx

RLT lube, surely it would work better cos it would be direct to business area?

Oh, too late again, goodnight guys!

Morning. I feel sick. And I've had to get up stupid early because a man is coming round to sort out my socket.

(grump)

Yawn. Last night was crap, DD kept waking up. I think she was having a growth spurt, she seems huge this morning.

Boff - If i'm not having a birthing pool, how necessary is plastic sheeting? I'm going through the list the midwfe gave me and wondering what I can borrow and what I can ignore.

Ju my love, what you call stupidly early will shortly become a lie in.

Juw look at you with the smut at 07.11!!!

Puzzle - how absorbent are your towels? I would personally be inclined to use it if you are planning to give birth in a room with carpet - just in case!

Hello!
Crap night for me too - random pointless contractions 1-2, midnight fridge raid 2-2.30.

Plastic sheeting - depends on your carpets. I put down an old plastic double sheet the other two times I had a HB, but this time I invested in a whole roll of bubble wrap of the type you get for greenhouse insulation, and I am going to put old towels on top of it. Apparently this is less slippy.

What I have got ready for the HB:
Nappy bucket with lid
2 packets paracetemol for after pains
4 big dark swimming towels
Hot water bottle
Little soft towel for baby
3 little cartons juice with straws
Above mentioned bubble wrap
Large tin chocolate biscuits for midwives

I have never owned the infamous anglepoise lamp for stitching, btw. Nor have I needed stitching.

PS Also tinfoil to wrap placenta in.

Tin foil? 40mins at 180 degrees? With potatoes dauphinoise?

Also for the aftermath, Moses basket all ready made up and ready to go, holding 2 nappies, babygro, vest, cardigan and hat, ready for midwife to sort baby out with. I forgot to do that last time.

Associated with this, little changing basket with wet wipes, nappy bags, nappy cream, travel changing mat, muslins, spare sheets, spare clothes and breast pads for plonking next to me wherever I end up in the house on the day, to make changing easy. That meconium is sticky yucky stuff! Bugger boiled cooled water and cotton wool.

Morning all - I had quite a good night's sleep for a change, that's actually three running. I only got up to go to the toilet once. I am to some extent of the random contractions though - I haven't had a bean and I'm getting increasingly convinced that I'm going to go to 42 weeks.

I feel very deprived, no-one in my family has a chocolate factory. Also Boffin, I'm impressed that you've already bought the tin of biscuits, I'd just eat them

Puzzle, with fava beans and a fine chianti, actually.

No, you double wrap it and then bury it in the garden, unless the garden is frozen solid, in which case the mw takes it to the hospital for disposal.

Brettgirl, I have actually gone off cakes and biscuits. Did not stop me putting on four stone though, which seems somewhat unfair.

They are the exciting end of the family. Uncle was a partner in a leading Hollywood architecture and interior design firm.

The German/UK contingent is comparatively boring on the other hand. Someone owns a Merc dealership over in Germany, but that's about it.

They better dig deep, we have a resident fox and all the neighbourhood cats in our garden.

BB - I'm planning to beg peoples old towels. Will probably end up with my Mum's dog towels. .
Are you at home today?

Puzzle - I know . but while I'm still in the post-work, pre-baby limbo I want to stay in bed until at least 8, if not 9!

BB - Glad you noticed

Brettgirl - I have not eaten my midwife biscuits yet (have had them in the house for nearly a week!), but I have every intention of eating them today!

Don't forget maroon bath sheets - £2.50 each in Wilko!!