December 08 - a few babies under the tree still need unwrapping!

[EffiePerine]

New thread ladies. I have a feeling I will be talking to myself a lot

big hug to you Trace - I'm sure your DD was happy with the calpol substitute! FWIW I tend to feed as a first resort, then go through other poss suspects if that doesn't work, esp in the evenings. I could never yell the different cues, but I think you do get better at guessing what might be up

oli: great birth story

LadyT A thread for you.

I think I might go to bed soon. Despite last night being our best yet, I am still very tired.

Hope we all have good nights.

and no, I don't think you can overfeed bf babies. If DS2 has had too much he just sicks it up. BF babies tend to feed more frequently anyway as BM is easier to digest

WG and Trace I really feel for you and remember that dreadful sinking feeling when approaching night. I haven't got there yet but as I said, Heidi is still in the sleepy phase so I am just a bit behind you I'm sure. One thing I am doing this time which I didn't do last is co sleeping. I was desperate to keep DS in his moses basket and spent countless nights fraught with it but I just opted (with no real thought or consideration) for co sleeping this time and it seems to work (so far). Apologies if I've missed something as I haven't caught up on all the past messages.
PS, Trace Please don't worry about sweets instead of medicine!!! Works a treat. If we have to wake DS from his lunchtime nap we always bribe him with chocolate to keep him happy. The alternative is such a grumpy old toad that I think a little chocci treat is perfectly acceptable (although I never would have thought so pre kids!!!!)

I'm off to bed now...DH is at poker (well it is Friday!!!) but will be back early as he is on shift with the older one!
I am trying to get as many early nights as poss as I am also rubbish at sleeping in the day. The nursery looks like a dumping ground from all the lovely clothes people keep bringing round that I haven't managed to sort through. I really want to blitz it as she is probably growing out of half of it as we speak but never seem to get round to it.
Good night all. Fingers crossed for (relatively as can be expected) peaceful nights x

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can anyone reassure us? dd has been essentially grizzly/having screaming/crying fits since midday today. she has slept for 45 mins at the most. dh is worried she is abnormal/doing herself an injury. does this sound like other people's experiences? i think it probably is normal, but dh is so so worried about her, especially as she wasn't breathing when she was born.

all she does is feed, nap for 10 mins and then scream the house down. she can fall asleep for a minute or two, and then wakes up screaming.

am thinking of getting her checked out by a doctor, just to reassure dh that she is fine, and this is "normal" baby behaviour, whatever that is.

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LadyT I'm in Herefordshire, in a tiny village called Bishops Frome, population about 200 (farmers)! Not actually that far from Oxfordshire, so if you get fed up and want the company of someone who knows the difference between Prada and Primark, I'll happily meet up with you - not that I have a Prada handbag, after 2 years living here, I realised that it just wasn't suitable for walking the dog.
Re reading cries, I have only just started to recognise Lily's cries and she is nearly 6 weeks old, so don't worry, it will happen. The really obvious one is the little cough cough type one which means she's hungry. The out and out screaming with legs and arms flailin gis usually wind and then overtiredness is a really sad and bit depressed sounding wail. Every baby is different, but that might give some of you some pointers. The baby whisperer has some greatdescriptionsof different cries which really helped me.
We've had 2 nights sans colic now, so am hoping that the combination of Infacol and gripewater and more winding between feeds is having the desired effect. I have also bought some Dr Greens bottles for the top ups. Night times are actually getting better, but don't usually get her into her moses basket before midnight, she then wakes at 3 for a quick feed, and I inevitably bring her into bed and then fall asleep, she then grizzles at about 6/7 so I plug her back on and then she'll sleep for another couple of hours. She's actually still asleep in bed with DH whilst I am entertaining DS.
I have yet to get her to sleep in the moses basket for a whole night, but entirely my fault for falling asleep with her in bed. Any tips on making sure you stay awake whilst feeding in bed so that I can get her back into the basket?
I'm feeling a little like Kayz, in that now that I am topping her up with formula that there isn't much point in continuing BF'ing. I actually am not really enjoying BF and get frustrated that it takes so long and stopsme doing other things with DS,howeveritisso much more convenient than having to worry about having enough bottles etc. DH keen for me to continue BF'ing, but it's not really his decision to make. Do you think I will really regret it if I give up now?
Sorry, that's ended up being a long one. Hope everyone has good weekends.

And my DD would defintely not win cutest baby at the moment, she has cradle cap on her face so is covered in scabs - lovely.
Sorry about the above typing, my space bar is playing up.

Morning,

DS2 had a good night last night and only woke up once. But he woke up DS1 who ended up having to come into our bed. He then thought it was time to play and was trying to bounce on our bed. He eventually went to sleep.

Katie It does have to be your decision, I think DH would like me to give up BF as he says I seem more tired this time round. But I still be getting woken up in the night so it won't make much difference. BF is better for when you go out as you don't need to take any bottles but you can get some really good stuff for FF. We have a thermal bag for the bottles, a tub with 3 sections for the formula and you can get flasks for hot water to warm the bottle. It can be quite easy to FF out and about. Whatever you choose make sure you are 100%, maybe you could express so DH can feed DD while you play with DS.

morning

Oli that birth story is lovely-brought a tear to my eye thinking of your DS walking in to meet his sister.

Katie it can only be your decision re giving up the breastfeeding, so as long as you are happy with that decision it doesn't really matter what other people might think. Did you BF your DS? I only ask because the only thing I would say is that a couple of months down the line it is MUCH easier than it is at the beginning.

WG I am no expert but it sounds quite common to me. Certainly had this with my DS1 a couple of times (he had reflux though). I think sometimes they get overtired and can't get themselves into a proper sleep. Worth asking the health visitor/doctor about to get some advice to put your mind at rest.

I am still feeling a bit emotional which happened with my other two at about three weeks. Thought I was getting mastitus yesterday(felt hot, then cold, had sore, red boob etc and looked like Dolly Parton on one side)but seems to be better today.

We are also about to put the Christmas decorations back in the loft and am really tempted to put the maternity clothes back in the loft too. To which DH firmly reminded me there is no way we are having any more children! which is fair enough, but it just feels very sad to have reached the end of an era. A good friend of my sister's had a baby girl on NYE so I have given her some of my favourite baby girl clothes and did feel a bit sad about that too. This friend's mum died on NYE when the friend was 12, so it has always been a sad day for her. What are the chances of her baby daughter arriving on the same date?

Majormoo Maybe it was some sort of fate, to try and make NYE a happier day.

I have decided I am not cultured or could even be remotely posh even if I wanted to be. I want to take DH out for a meal on Valentine's day so I had a look at a couple of Michelin Star restaurants near here and I don't really like anything on the menus. We always go to the same Cantonese place which is gorgeous but I thought we could have a change.

Hey Ladies,

Got a breast feeding question for all the guru's out there.

Woke up this morning and feel a bit like crap. I'm running a fever and hurt all over. Hoping it's not the flu. When you are sick do you continue BF or switch to formula and pump the breast milk?? Can't the baby get sick too since everything passes through the milk?

Also... the sides of my boobs hurt SO BAD! It hurts to lift my arms. I feel like I've done 1000 pushups. Not sure if this is related to fever and feeling bad or if it's the beginning of metasistis (not sure on the spelling)

Any ideas??

I'll probably call the birth unit as well and ask them. But I know you ladies are a full of a wealth if knowledge!!! :D

Kimberly you need to keep breastfeeding whether it is mastitis or other illness. If it's flu or something this will help give LO immunity and if it is mastitis it won't affect LO but feeding will help get rid of it.
HTH

Thanks katie!

trace in response to your screamathon last night, it may be that DD had just not quite had enough when she fed an hour previously. I fed DS last night for his usual 30 mins then he was really unsettled for over an hour, I tried everything to no avail (was convinced overtired and not hunger) then I put to to the boob and he sucked ravenously and settled ! LIke wg said, there is no harm in trying the boob if they are inconsolable. It may have been that when they fed earlier they did a lot of comfort sucking and didn't take enough milk... am just guessing too but I suppose we'll learn as we go !

wg well done for braving the bath ! We put it off too as DS hated it in hospital but when we did eventually do it he loved it and we do it to calm him sometimes now . On the screaming, have you tried a sling ? Is she very pukey ? My friend's baby was very unsettled and had reflux... I guess if the screaming is bad it may be colic.

On the subject of crying, I am finding that I am crying a lot less now as I approach 6 weeks post-birth. Maybe the hormones are finally settling down and I can be just like a 'normal' person again !

DS is smiling at black and white images of faces/shapes. He also loves his swing and the mobile above it makes him grin sometimes. I tried a book of baby faces and he was not interested.

BF question - should it still hurt after 5 weeks ? the latch is really painful and still causes me to yell out sometimes. I am now also getting pain throughout the feed which is torture. DS doesn't seem to move his head from side to side when he latches any more and his mouth doesn't seem to open as wide - could this be why it hurts so much ? any advice for fixing this as not sure I can continue, am dreading each feed

Quickie as am very behind with everyone - but Mibbes re; latch, no it really shouldn't be painful at this point. Have you tried reading Dr Jack Newman's pdf on latch. I found of everything I have done this has helped me most finally get a good latch. For me it has helped to hold baby's head on side to control it properly to get their chin in tilted towards boob and so the latch UP and Over. He desribes it best I think. Check out the pdf called "when latching" Jack Newman For some reason I found reading this and looking at the diagram better than the two lactation consultants who saw me (I get performance anxiety! and am not naturally dexterous).

KImberley sorry you are feeling grim. Can I direct you to the Dr Jack link too which tells you about feeding when sick and also if you do have mastitis (and sounds a little like it when I had it) the list of antibiotics to get (some gps prescribe anti-bs that are actually useless for mastitis). But the answer for both as Katie says is feed feed feed. Take to bed and have DH bring Judah to you everytime he needs a feed.

Terrible morning of tears here. Was feeling very resentful of DH who was off golfing !! But we had a good chat and feeling a bit better. But upset by news story that a 3 hour old baby has been left under a hedge in Bedfordshire. Find am so sensitive tostories like that at mo.

WG aware I didn't mail you the Gina F timings. Would you still like them to try. It has totally turned things around for us and we were having shocking nights. Let me know.

Better go. L crying.

WG have found and packaged GF book will pop it in the post first thing monday.

turnip - those timings would be fab - thanks - will email you (you are siobhan???) - i think i have been trying to contact the wrong person for it - apols to whoever it was.

i don't believe in karma, but i am loathe to put that non belief to the test - however in short... we had a good night and a lovely good day. at present dh is shushing dd and carrying her around the room in an effort to keep her from the meltdown we feel must be inevitable as we are due one now. we do recognise the magic of the sling, but are trying to keep it for the evenings in case we use it too much and the magic wears off.

we went to a local coffee shop today and another couple came in with their in laws and one year old. we ended up talking and they were so supportive - saying that the first weeks are a nightmare and that things do do get better. i've got her telephone number and may well get in contact over the coming weeks. they were both so supportive and honest about their experiences - it was great.

jam - you are a star! thx

not that i want to turn into a GF person, but interested in finding out what she is all about.

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turnip Thanks for the info. Can you repost the link for Dr Jack?? Sorry you've been weepy. I have been as well. I guess it comes with the territory. We've all been through a lot the last few weeks.

I'm still running a fever and I think Judah may be sick now as well. Looks like it's going to be a rough night for all.

right... off to feed... again!

hello!
I'm not crying! In fact we've had a good day - Phoebe has waited 2 and a half hours between some feeds (long time for her!) and has slept well in between (albeit being cuddled!). Now she is asleep in her cot, Lucy is asleep in her bed, and DH and I are getting a Chinese - and I feel like eating it (not fancied any food for weeks!). Things are good tonight. Don't want to count my chickens but it does give hope...

WG - I've been wondering about the GF thing. I did extract bits of it for use with Lucy but couldn't do it properly because with her being prem, I couldn't go with the ages and so it didn't really work, but I did glean some helpful hints. Said today that I'd like to get Phoebe in some kind of routine, given that Lucy's school times are not going to change, so we need to fit feeds around that, and DH just laughed at my unrealistic expectation to manage to 'train' her! Ye of little faith - I'll show him!

I've got millions (well, 5) of ulcers in my mouth at the moment and they really sting (not a patch on the post-birth fanjo stinging, but sore all the same!). I told DH and he said "that's lack of sleep - you need an early night"!!!what does he think I do - deliberately prod Phoebe so she wakes me every hour at night?!!

well I hope we all get good nights - we must be due a bit of a positive spell...[fingers crossed emoticon!]