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December 08 - a few babies under the tree still need unwrapping!

696 replies

EffiePerine · 30/12/2008 22:17

New thread ladies. I have a feeling I will be talking to myself a lot

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
kmp1 · 05/01/2009 23:18

Jam thanks for another "bum crease" story! DH has assured me it's nothing abnormal and not even related to the dimple thing etc but I still thought I am going to go register him at the GP so I may as well make myself an appointment as I want to convince them to write a letter to sign me off ok to drive before the 6 weeks as apparently it's ok with some insurance agencies provided you get this - and no matter how stupid i feel i'm going to get GP to tell me his bum crack is all ok
Hi LadyT sorry i didn't make it to westfield - i didn't leave the flat until 230pm and did go over to Fulham to register him but it was dark by the time i got back on the train and snowing!! So I called it a day - promise to meet up next time though! I also did the carrier thing as I had been given one and they are great! He slept the whole time in it from leaving the flat to getting back (mind you only was out 3 hours or so!) But it was so much easier than doing the buggy and all that. Too cold to walk from the tube station home so i took the bus and the people on it were so nice to me when they saw my little load!
Veggie oh yes i remember now, I am having flashbacks of that place - i had to do a new Aussie passport for myself once and i remember i was quite stressed when i found myself desperate for the loo - i do remember the church! Changing ds1 could be annoying when i go. Very nice of you to offer the photo signing thing - i actually think it said if the applicant is under 6yo it doesn't have to be someone known him a year! I will see how we go but def keep you in mind so thanks for that - though you're up north aren't you?
I am also thinking about the contraception thing as I want to lose the ds1 weight first but then try to get pregnant again quite soon after that. I'm 35 this year and i'd also like to have them quite close together in age so good to know about the pill messing with fertility possibly... I will also ask the GP about this which is another good reason to have an appointment! we might just do the condom thing or even reply on the BF contraception theory I know we should wait at least 6 months after a c-section but i'd like to BF for that long if I can so we'll see.... Only 2 kids for us though I think!
I am going to try ds1 in the cot tonight - haven't since the 1st week home when he screamed and screamed when put in it, but he's settled down a lot more these days and i'm not comfortable with the fact i keep falling asleep when feeding him and wake after 2 hours desperately hoping i havent squashed him!
Anyway, praying for a good night - if not i'll be back here shortly!
Congrats Emma!!!

kmp1 · 05/01/2009 23:26

veggie just realised that if ds1 is only 4 weeks old it's impossible to have known anyone a year - hence the under 6y/o thing i guess.... i dobn't think it's me that has to have know the citizen i think it's the applicant - oh i don't know - i really need to have a proper look at the website tomorrow!!

LadyThompson · 05/01/2009 23:27

No worries, KMP. Glad you were also out and about with the carrier! Gee whizz though, my back really is aching now.

Now I am thinking Persona, but it may be too risky. Might suit you though, KMP. You pee on a stick every day, and if it's green it's ok to do it, but if it's red you might not want to bother

Have good nights, all

Veggiemummy · 05/01/2009 23:56

Kmp the applicants parents need to have known the person a year but really I'm sure they would let you use a suitable British person or a lawyer or noterary public or someone like that.

I love the Vatican roulette have never heard that one.on both occassions we got pregnant the first month we started trying which apart from making DH strutt around thinking was a prize stallion made me think I must have been very lucky with a few ex's.

waitinggirl · 06/01/2009 01:31

loving "vatican roulette"

am i stupid: aren't cap and diaphragm the same? keep thinking back to perfunctory sex edcuation classes at school. we're condom people - not a problem for dh, bless.

SummerLightning · 06/01/2009 01:46

I thought they were the same thing too. Also you can only take the mini pill if you are bfimg can't you. I think you have to take it at a precise time of day for it to work not good for me as I am sometimes too dozy to manage the normal pill.
Wg how is your dd tonight?
Can't type big catch up as on the iPhone while feeding!
Oh wg and other c section people I wanted to ask re recovery should it still hurt after 10 days? Not the scar but my stomach in general is still sore and eg I can't walk fast without it pulling. I would have thought it was normal but wg saying that it hardly hurt from day 1 has me wondering!

Turniphead1 · 06/01/2009 04:41

Emma yay - well done on the birth of baby Amber. Love that name so much. And the first baby girl hospital of 09 at your, what a feat!

Hmmm I need to look at some contraception at some point too. Have always used condoms in recent years but like Veggie having got pg first month on each three times (a real blessing of course but we are now DONE on the children front) need to take care.

The GOOD news is that Baby Turnip gained 150 grams (nearly 7 ounces!) since leaving hospital on Friday. I was so pleased as have massive issues about weight loss from my other two. Never managed to get that kind of gain previously. So making the total sleep deprivation worth it. The m/w was so sweet, she was so excited too as she knows how much it means to me and how worried we were.

KMP hope you are reassured on the bum crease thing. Never experienced it but sounds like its fairly normal.

LadyT hope babyO does another night like that for you soon. Sounds fabulous! much And glad you enjoyed the wedding. Am really looking forward to my first child free event! A friend got engaged over xmas, (last of our crew til the second marriages!) so that's one to look forward to!

I totally sympathise with those with wind issues. I had totally forgotten what a 'mare it and how there is no answer. We are trapped in a feeding/screaming cycle too during night. Am knackered. Like others I am putting baby on her side (amd also warming her moses with a hottie bottie before putting her down - watch me be arrested by the guidelines police!) And whoever was worried about sleeping with DC on shoulder against chest - my MiL did that last night when I finally cracked at about 4.30 - and frankly I couldn't have cared (bad mother alert).

Am being dense about Jump's thread about wind. Where is it?

Better go as DD may have settled for first time tonight in her Moses.

For anyone looking for a series to Skyplus for feeding times can I recommend the Party of Five reruns on Zone Romantica (not a channel I have ever come across before...). With DS it was Thirtysomething reruns. Both series stand the test of time. Mmmmmm Matthew Fox! Laters...

kayzr · 06/01/2009 05:59

Morning,

We had a pretty bad night here. DS2 would not go to sleep. He would feed, fall asleep, wake up screaming, be winded, be fed, fall asleep and then wake up screaming. We went to bed at half 9 and he went to sleep at about 12. He then woke up at 4 and it all started again. So I decided to get up with DH at 5 when he got up to get ready for work.

I was planning to try and get some sleep on the sofa but DS1 decided he wanted to get up too. So now both of the boys are up and awake.

I really hope you all had better nights.

Verso · 06/01/2009 07:48

OMG kayzr you've had pretty much the same night as me ! DD2 finally went down at 11pm - after HOURS of me feeding, rocking, burping her etc... and then slept until 3am. I was quite pleased about that part actually. She then went down for 20 minutes and then woke up SCREAMING. She wouldn't settle again for ages - eventually got her off by putting her in her snowsuit and rocking her in the car seat (it's really cold in our house and in any case DH was saying he should just take her out in the car...) she's now been asleep for about two hours... she's been so restless and noisy though that I haven't been able to get any more sleep myself.

I think she's got a cold, which is part of the trouble - it prevents her settling.

I'm scared I'm getting PND - just can't stop crying and feeling like a failure - either that or feeling really really angry and impatient and irritable and then feeling guilty for not existing in some loved-up Mummy haze of postnatal bliss. I keep telling myself if I could just get some decent sleep I would feel better but I'm starting to wonder whether I should quit breastfeeding, get some serious antidepressants and start divvying up the night duties...

Thing is, breastfeeding (after our rocky start) is going REALLY well - so it's one thing I feel I'm doing ok with... so I'm not sure I can give it up... or, perversely, that I want to give it up - even though I know if I switched I could get more rest by sharing out the baby care a bit more

kayzr you totally have my sympathy. I hope the others have had better nights than us.

Verso · 06/01/2009 07:52

FWIW I think the cap is a slightly more conical version of the diaphragm. The diaphragm is more dish-shaped.

Vatican Roulette eh?!! lol. I used to have a Persona for years and it was fab - until I learned to do fertility awareness (which helped for conception too). Fertility awareness is FREE once you've bought a fertility thermometer (about £2.99 - you need one that does two decimal places). Persona sticks, if I remember rightly, are quite expensive.

People think fertility awareness is risky, but if you have a reasonably regular cycle and monitor a combination of signs it's very very effective. I have used it since before conceiving DD1 - about five years in total. I can post links to more info if anyone is interested (though there are probably lots of threads about it on MN too).

Only problem I have at the moment is that with breastfeeding your cycle gets messed up so I think it will have to be condoms here until I wean DD2...

Verso · 06/01/2009 07:55

turnip WELL DONE on the weight gain! and much sympathy to you for your bad night as well. Sorry I've been reading the thread backwards and hadn't seen that you had an awful time too. (And I'd totally forgotten about 'Thirtysomething' - talk about a blast from the past! )

Verso · 06/01/2009 07:56

SL I think some 'discomfort' (?) while you're healing is normal. With me it definitely got a bit 'tight' feeling in week two or thereabouts - I think it's when the stitches really start to heal internally (I didn't have any external stitches, just a pressure bandage so it was an internal feeling that I had).

Sorry for all the messages but I have a mini-laptop and it's difficult to read more than part of the thread at a time so I end up replying piecemeal!

kayzr · 06/01/2009 08:07

Sorry you had a bad night too Verso. I know what you mean about giving up BF. I sometimes think it would help but I still need to be awake as DH can't lift DS2 in and out of his moses basket. So it's not really worth it.

pixsix · 06/01/2009 08:46

Hi All, sympathies for all the bad nights.

We are going to Oxford Street today to look for a new fridge so i will have to bf in public. We went to Canary Wharf on Sunday to do some shopping and i bfed twice in cafes. It was not too bad but i felt really self conscious. my main problem is getting him latched on without showing my entire (sizable) boob. He doesn't latch straight away and i have to support the boob while he's trying to get on. Any tips for not flashing while latching? on the plus side, once he was on, covering up was quite easy.

katie3677 · 06/01/2009 09:07

SL my tummy still hurts 5 weeks on, not the scar so much but above it and my Dr signed me back on to driving last week.I just rang the surgery and he rang me back and said it was fine, so you may not need to make an appointment KMP, although if you are getting DS checked out anyway...
Another crap night here, DD was screaming with wind until 2.30. Once I got her down, she actually slept until 5, but DS kept waking up worrying that the birds might eat the caterpillar he found in the garden and DH didn't hear him, allegedly, so I had to keep getting up.

katie3677 · 06/01/2009 09:30

Quick piece of advice needed. DD hasn't had a poo for 3 days now, should I be worried? She has gone from having one an hour to just having one per evening for 2 days, and now nothing. Lots of wet nappies still though, but this can't be helping her wind.

Turniphead1 · 06/01/2009 09:45

pixsix if you are on Oxford Street I would recommend timing your feed with a trip to John Lewis where they have a nice feeding room with lovely Hauk feeding rockers and that way you don't have to worry about flashing etc. There is room for buggies and change tables immediately outside. JL and Peter Jones are always great for early feeding when a lot of flesh and a good chair needed imho! Mothercare further down also has a feeding rm. Further down the line I find feeding in cafes fine with a pashmina or muslin over the shoulder and a chair not right in a main thoroughfare. If a bit of flesh gets shown, who cares...There are also b'fing capes you can buy but I think they look a bit mad to be honest and draw more attention than a babe snuggled against the chest.

Kyaz sorry you had a bad night. Hope today is OK with both your boys. Does Ds1 still nap? Maybe the nap fairy will descend and they will go down at once??

Verso/Kayz I totally understand your being conflicted (to sound American) about bf'ing. I have various issues with it - mainly due to previous weight gain issues with my other two. But also in many ways bottle feeding and the "certainty" of what goes in suits my Type A control freak type personality a lot more than b'fing.

Katie you had a shocker too. Its awful when both are up and about. Hugs and some rest in order.

Can I just thank PD for letting us know about the dr jack newman website . Had never heard of it, only Kelly Mom but think it is fab. For anyone struggling with latch, nipple pain it really is worth a look at his pdf on attachment and the video clips. I have also just found that putting a phone book under my feet and thus raising my knees level with my hips has really really helped me. Couldn't tell you why...

Hope a good day is had by all.

Some b'f questions -

Is everyone say feeding from right breast, offering left too and then starting from the left next time.

Or do you feed from right and then feed from left next? (sorry badly worded - I guess I am asking, should I always start on the breast I last finished on?)

DD is 7 days old today (my word!) but her poo is still greeny/brown with tinge of yellow (saag aloo anyone?). She still must be excreting bilirubin b/c of jaundice but newman suggests she should defo be doing the yellowy mustard seed poos by now.

Does anyone else have tiny red blotches all over their chest after they have fed. Does this mean anything (thrush, blocked ducts etc?)

You would think I would know this stuff!

Hope everyone has a good day (gosh but the days are so much easier than the nights eh!)

Turniphead1 · 06/01/2009 09:48

Katie that is one Q I can answer. Yes, totally normal in a b'f baby after first couple of weeks to then start going ages without a poo. Its not constipation, apparently its just because babies use breast milk so efficiently. Jack Newman talks about the pooing and weeing on the website.

katie3677 · 06/01/2009 10:14

Thanks Turnip, I love this thread. DH told me to ring the HV, but who needs them with Mumsnet mates. Love you all for your constant support, advice and solidarity. (I'm not drunk by the way...)

waitinggirl · 06/01/2009 10:28

HALLELUJAH! a night without a complete meltdown (apols to those who had crap night - everyone, take heart: if we can do it, so can you). we have discovered the magic of the sling - basically once she's in it, and dh is tramping up and downstairs a couple of times, she seems to quiet and sleep - magic, magic stuff. doesn't make it easier to get the sodding thing on (a fabric one), or negate the initial 20 mins or so, or stop it being hard to get her out of it and into the basket, but it is working. i would highly recommend it to anyone with difficulties settling their LO.

she is, however, now feeding more frequently - every 3 hours, not every 4, but i suppose with a newbie that's ok.

i have to thank dh for being a star and looking after her after the feeds last night - he has been wonderful (we are also talking about pnd for dads a lot - been looking it up on the internet).

SL - don?t even think about me being up and around without pain from cs ? I am a complete freak ? all the nurses looked at me like I was insane, and I am very very lucky. We went for a 20 min walk yesterday and I did feel some pulling as well from the scar. If it hurts hurts, I would get yourself down the doctors just to make sure, maybe?

i am very envious of those feeling confident enough to go properly out at the mo - i think it might do us the world of good to get out and about, but we are feeling a bit ginger about things. also have to wait in for the midwife today. btw - have beeen so impressed with mw visits - the system really does seem to work!

Does everyone else have their heating on constant and is anticipating bankruptcy when the bills come in?

Emma - hurrah for your dd!! Wonderful news!

verso, kayz and others - may our good sleep vibes visit you tonight. and also make a reappearance with us.

LadyThompson · 06/01/2009 10:48

Hooray for the weight gain, Turnip! I think you have the same taste in slightly schmaltzy American dramas as me - I loved Thirtysomething and I LUH-HUH-HUVVED Party of Five. Unfortunately we don't have Sky in the country, only in London...grrr...as it's problematic. I miss my Sky+.

Verso, I am sorry you are feeling low and of course you are very far from a failure. When does PND tend to kick in? I am exceptionally ignorant about it despite my sister suffering from it with her first child - I was at university at the time and I was the last person she wanted to talk to about it, I think mainly because she felt I was just gadding about having fun and it made her feel worse. Is your GP any good? I guess your HV is just the normal irritating kind but is there a nice midwife you can ring? I wish you could get a break for a bit and have a rest and then you'd be in a better position to assess how you are really feeling. I take my hat off to anyone who is breastfeeding - the more I hear about it, the more phenomenally difficult and complex it sounds. I know you are doing well with it but apart from anything else is makes taking a break near impossible. I do hope things improve for you.

WG, I used to think the cap and diaphragm were one and the same. I think sex education was a bit duff at my school (which is probably why two girls in my year got pregnant). The one had the kid so he will be pushing 21 by now. Yikes. Perhaps she is even a granny Anyway, the cap is like a thimble, which fits on your cervix like a rubber hat on a pool cue. Fiddly. The diaphragm is a big flying saucer thing which you have to squirt spermicide onto. Sounds great, eh? The information I looked at also mentioned it being spring loaded at the sides I think even Casanova would struggle to maintain interest after dealing with that little lot. I may try a combo of Persona and fertillity monitoring (thanks Verso, good idea). You can buy the Persona sticks on Amazon now. Is there NOTHING you can't buy on Amazon these days? Did I blink and it suddenly became an online Walmart?

In terms of telly watching, we are going through the box set of Our Friends in the North - so good, although I watched it when it was on. I've been lent the series of Blackpool which my Mum raves about - any cop?

Summer, my scar didn't feel good until very recently - ie the last week or two (six weeks on!) Mind you, it seemed to turn a corner very quickly. I still have the numbness above it but no pain really (only the mental pain when I look in the mirror at the unattractive overhang ) However, I am planning to do a bit of rowing machine tonight or maybe a dash of Davina. Hmm, let's see if I get time [sceptical emoticon]

Now that DP is back at work properly, I HAVE to try to tidy the flat. I never seem to get on top of it and in a flat this size the chaos drives one nutso. But I also have work to do. So I mustn't spend the entire day on Mumsnet/emailing my mates.

Oh, forgot to say that I have got 'postnatal arthritis' in my fingers and wrist. Before I had the baby it kept getting called Carpal Tunnel or Tendonitis . Anyway, I'm on Voltarol and it can last up to six months. Here's hoping I don't end up with a Matthew Perry style addiction to anti-inflammatories I forgot to ask the obstetrician about flying after a cs. I dimly recall something about a greater risk of dvt in the early months (and I think after any surgery). Anyone know?

artichokes · 06/01/2009 10:55

Morning!

LadyT - Gah, I forgot that yesterday was the possible Westfield meet. When does the pregnancy brain recover??? Mine is getting worse. If you loved Westfield then we must rearrange. How did your black outfit go down at the wedding?

Katie - After week 3 DD1 only pooed once every 10 days for months. The HV said it was fine for a BFed baby. I loved it, so few bad nappies .

Pixsix - have you tried wearing a low cut t-shirt under a jumper for discrete feeding? If you can lift your boob over the low-cut top then the t-shirt covers your tummy and the jumper covers most of the boob.

Turnip - I am BFing from right breast, offering left too and then starting from the left next time. I think you should be getting khaki poos by now. If they are still very dark then maybe talk to your midwife or HV. I too have red patches on my chest after feeding but that is because DD2 claws at me with her tiny scratchy nails...

Re contraception - I can't tolerate hormonal contraception, it makes me fat and anxious. Therefore we used Persona for ages. It worked perfectly for us. It was also helpful when TTC as it tells you when you are fertile. I think we will use it again, although I am slightly more hesitant as before I knew I wanted more babies, so a mistake would have been OK, now I am not so sure (acutally I am hugely and strangely broody but surely that it some weird hormone induced madness).

Sorry to those having bad nights. We have been in quite a settled pattern for a while. The evening is spent snoozing and feeding with us in front of the TV. Then 10.30pm to 2.30am she is nicely settled in moses basket. Then she wakes for a feed, refuses to settle back in basket but sleeps happily right next to me. Wakes after 2 hours (5ish) and then wakes for day at 6.40am. I guess its not bad but I would like her in the moses basket more so I can relax while sleeping.

No real news here. DH is still on paternity leave but yesterday I took both DDs to toddler music on my own. It was quite empowering. Then in the afternoon I met up with three mates with toddlers and newborns and we did cafe society for a few hours. It felt like normal life again after quarantine of late pregnancy, christmas and newborn days.

I am off to get DD2 weighed now. Wish us luck!

LadyThompson · 06/01/2009 10:57

WG - so glad you had a better night. Slings and things are brilliant, aren't they? Glad you are having good postnatal care - the postnatal care in Westminster sounded like it was really good too - I had numerous calls and letters even though I kept explaining I was now in Oxfordshire. Good old London town Hope you enjoy the shopping trip, Pixsix My dream fridge is a pink Smeg. Needless to say, both here and in London, both fridges are tiny, old and crap.

Hope Katie and Kayz can get some proper shut eye today.

Kimberly1979 · 06/01/2009 11:00

Hey everyone, I've been lurking for a few days but have not been able to catch up properly.

Big hugs to everyone who has been having rough nights.

Has anyone else's babies has a rash on their face? Looks similar to pimples. Judah has it on his face and some on his chest. The MW came round the other day and we asked her about it. She didn't even look at him and just said it was normal! I'm beginning to worry a little since it doesn't seem to be going away and sometimes turns bright red.

artichokes · 06/01/2009 11:03

Oooh yes, Party of Five, loved it as a teen. I was living in SanFrancisco when it was first on and I used to dream I would run into Bailey.

Blackpool was good too. Very surreal but gripping.

We have box sets of The Wire and Gavin and Stacey which we alternate depending on levels of tiredness. However, I may never be able to watch Gavin and Stacey again after last night... I was sitting on the sofa with my trousers undone and my tummy hanging out, and my thong pulled up a little high and my ill advised tatoo on display (can't beleive I am describing this). And DH looked over at me and said "God, its like living with a real life Nessa"...