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Due April 2009 - Festive bumps explode into crimbo, April mums wait in limbo

1002 replies

BabyCRIMBOlat · 15/12/2008 19:48

New thread here (I hope!!)

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NuttyTaff · 02/01/2009 20:56

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SpringySunshine · 02/01/2009 20:59

Happy New Year, my fellow gorgeous pregnancy victims

So pleased to see that frekkles got her scan & everything's okay! Must be so relieved xx

What was in your parcel, mathsmummy? MIL bought us our cotbed today. There was no way that we were going to avoid, or even postpone, it so we just went along & nodded in the right places. Whilst (obviously) very grateful, I've had a few issues (but I'll have a mini-rant in a minute ) about the whole thing.

Nutty, you weren't half dedicated to the New Year wishes at 3 minutes past midnight! We're honoured Although DP & I went all the way to the ILs (3 hours in the car) to spend NYE with his family, we ended up spending the whole night alone anyway because they went to bed

I am being woken several times a night by persistent kicking & the need to wee - let alone the trying to get to sleep in the first place. & I had the first bath in months last night & my bump actually made a couple of its own splashing noises which was a bit surreal.

Boffin, so pleased that your SPD is better! Long may it continue! & your independent midwifery experience sounds a million times better than the crap you've put up with so far (loving the Indian call centre transcript ) Lovely to hear you more cheerful xx

BB, you're going to have to put up a photo of your nursery so I can be enough to bother sorting ours out. I'm always telling my bump off out loud. He's taken to protesting so strongly when I move that I've been very close to telling DP off with a proper face for prodding me in the tummy before I've realised that it's coming from the inside on quite a few occasions now & my skin is just beyond help now - I've given up & accepted looking like I'm 14

My last couple of days have been okay. I got really overemotional on Wednesday. It started when I was trying to pack to visit the ILs & realised that I've been wearing the same clothes about twice a week every week for months now & that none of them were clean and dry. Then I remembered how I spent last NYE (it was fantastic - out with friends in a club with a fantastic atmosphere & arriving home at 5am with party popper paper still in my hair ) & compared it to be 6 months pregnant with the ILs scenario I was about to face. Then I started freaking out about the magnitude of motherhood & how it was nearly 'this year' that I was having the baby & how am I going to cope? I just about calmed down enough to get in the car & go to the ILs' to arrive to immediate over-excitement & "look what I've been buying for the baby!". Which was 4 massive bags of clothes (some of which for when he's 4 because she 'couldn't resist' ) & various other madness. I sat & was grateful & enthusiastic, but all the while was close to running back out of the door.

Eventually got DP to myself after making an excuse to go upstairs & just burst into tears about how overwhelmed by everything I was. Whilst he didn't really understand he understood as much as a man really can, I think. & I think after the hours of looking at cotbeds on the internet with his mum (which we didn't really want to do) & then having to make a special 40 mile round trip to go to Mothercare to look at them & buy one, he's beginning to see that it's a bit much. Especially when late last night she suddenly announced "I know what else we need! Scratch mitts!" with extreme excitement.

Bless her, she's lovely. I really do like her. She's as mad as a box of frogs sometimes, but she's really, really nice. I feel a bit bad saying any of this because she is being really generous & helpful. But there are 3 months left to go & she's acting like the baby's arriving tomorrow - & that she's the only person capable of organising everything for his arrival.

DP said earlier, though, that she's dangerously close to making it 'all about her' & that he may have to have words - especially if she becomes the overbearing grandmother type, trying to tell us how to do everything her way. That was really nice because it's the first time that I've really felt that he's more interested in pleasing this family than that one

On the funny IL side of things, there was a great 10 minute period where she decided that it'd be fun to corner me with her new 'Men In Uniform' calendar & rate every single man whilst fanning herself & making hilariously lewd comments. When I told DP about it after she'd gone to bed, he said 'Yes, that was a bit inappropriate Sadly, that's just the way she rolls ' I'm actually quite pleased that I got a type MIL story from the festive season that doesn't involve any or faces

Hope everyone's okay & has a nice weekend planned. I have my sister visiting until Sunday night (unexpected, but very welcome visit) & we've been out for a lovely meal tonight. She & DP are currently playing Fight Night on the Xbox (saying things like 'come here, I haven't smashed your eye up enough yet!' & so on to each other )but I'm going to throw them off so I can watch Celebrity Big Brother now

My life is so rock & roll

SpringySunshine · 02/01/2009 21:01

Nutty, I hope I'm not too late for a cookie?

& AA, I'm soooo I was amazed & astounded by the frosty fields in Cumbria (I've only ever lived in cities ), let alone lovely sledging. at the smoking pregnant lady, though. That definitely eradicates any snow-related guilt!

BoffinMum · 02/01/2009 21:18

I told my lovely mws quite a bit of my mindnoise post and one of them said "Now if it happens again, you ring us and we will jump off the roof with you if necessary!"

What loves they are!!

NuttyTaff · 02/01/2009 21:24

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NuttyTaff · 02/01/2009 21:29

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BabyBolat · 02/01/2009 22:27

Hey Springy

I completely get how hard it can be - I went out to buy the cotbed at the weekend and it is a bit expensive but not overly so I don't think! Anyway DH was at work so took mum with me who proceeded to frown and make ridiculous comments about it's size and cost and then ignored my questions and looked at every other flipping bed in there with much more enthusiasm at which point I got in a strop and decided to leave it until me and DH can pick it up together. She is a bit like that tho and hates everything in the world she hasn't chosen herself!! It is important to strike a balance tho and while it is great your MIL is so excited, you need to find some sort of happy medium! Although when I was 3 months pregnant I did get a lecture from MIL via DH about the importance of persevering with BFing (I was tempted to say that I had already decided not to do it just to cut the conversation short!!)

Think we have all had those moments where it becomes a bit real - especially when we are faced with direct realisations of how our lives will change but the only way I can get through it is to keep thinking that actually my life post baby will be even more fun and exciting than before!

Oh Nutty, have you got the any biscuits left... just got back from a three hour round trip to London and biscuits could solve all my problems!!!

I think I would die if my MIL started taking me through her calendar - like you said though - great that you have a semi decent MIL!

Nutty I think I want your DD - she sounds like the cutest thing (in her actions and comments!)

Boffin, can I have your midwives too - they just sound great and seems like the whole process will be much more chilled now!!!

Anyway, DH is frowning at me for concentrating more on MN than him so best be off!! Hope everyone has a restful night.

BB

SpringySunshine · 02/01/2009 22:37

Haha, I love 'did a fairy get you?' - ace I wasn't even drunk last NYE ( all round) but it was just so much fun. I was dressed as a sexy Christmassy elf, in a green silk dress with a red belt & red stockings & shoes. I looked really good & had an amazing night. Now I look like a beached whale, have stretchmarks on my fingers (nobody warned me of that!) & had a really crappy evening pretty much watching the fireworks on tv on my own as DP read his book

I was getting drunken texts off my mates until 4ish (increasingly incomprehensible ) & feeling quite envious every time I checked my phone in the midst of bleary-eyed pregnancy insomnia.

But now I'm kind of thinking 'haha, they don't get a baby this year', which seems like a good thing again. It comes & goes in waves

The MIL thing is generally okay - she is nice, but she does need to calm down a bit. Having said that, I'm not sure where she can go from here. I just hope that my family can find something left to buy!

& Boffin, I want to share your MWs I've still not been able to get hold of mine at all.

Out of interest, how high is everyone being kicked? Because I'm sure that I've been told that 26 weeks = uterus level with bellybutton (what bellybutton? ), but I'm getting lots of kicks that are about an inch below my boobs. I thought at first that it must just be weird nerve confusion, but we've seen the bulges... Am I growing a monster baby?

SpringySunshine · 02/01/2009 22:44

BB, I nearly did die during the calendar incident. Especially as my dad used to be in the army & is now a fireman - men in uniform don't hold the usual appeal for me

& yes, that's exactly it - it's nice that she's showing an interest, but she's already telling me how to parent (not only what to buy / what not to buy / "why did you buy that? What were you thinking?") & giving me tips on feeding baby rice from birth (I wonder what they'd say about that out on the bottle & breast feeding topics [devil emoticon]) & so on. It's difficult to keep nodding & smiling & saying "oh yes, I'll bear that in mind, mmhmm "

NuttyTaff · 02/01/2009 22:55

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BoffinMum · 02/01/2009 22:55

Imagine how I felt when DD brought home a charidee calendar from her school when she was 15 or 16, of the school boys' hockey team, naked, entitled "We're hot, like our hockey". Eeeeow!!

NuttyTaff · 02/01/2009 23:01

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NuttyTaff · 02/01/2009 23:03

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SpringySunshine · 02/01/2009 23:06

Nutty, your MIL is evil. Mine's not evil... She's a lot of things, but mostly she's just bonkers. But I will speak up, don't worry. I can do a good line in opinionated bitch & I'm still getting kicked below the bellybutton too (which isn't an 'outie' yet, but completely flat) but definitely really high up. Apparently DP was 22.5 inches long when he was born & it's looking like I may even be about to break that family record with some freakily huge child

Boffin, that's vile & I'm surprised it was allowed Probably hilarious if you knew them, though.

BoffinMum · 02/01/2009 23:07

I think the calendar was but not the film.

BoffinMum · 02/01/2009 23:07

They were dead spotty and there was a lot of hair gel. I wouldn't have shagged any of them in a month of Sundays.

NuttyTaff · 02/01/2009 23:28

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SpringySunshine · 02/01/2009 23:34

Maybe they lost every game

& that sounds awful. I'm hoping that's not going to happen! But yeah, I'm just not sure how he's kicking quite so high yet. I feel like I must be 9 months pregnant already!

NuttyTaff · 02/01/2009 23:49

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SpringySunshine · 03/01/2009 00:35

Shush it up, Nutty - I'm 26 weeks tomorrow. Well, technically today now [terror] When did we get to be so pregnant?

14 weeks... I properly started counting down weeks when I still had about 28 weeks to go - I'm now halfway through that countdown

We're so close. We've done well to get this far - very few of us have had anything like an 'easy' time of it. I'm so proud to be part of this group of fantastic women. The world's so lucky that we're all breeding

NuttyTaff · 03/01/2009 01:44

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NuttyTaff · 03/01/2009 01:57

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BabyBolat · 03/01/2009 09:25

Oh Nutty! I feel really bad for you - I love sleep so am dreading insomnia! I am fine in the mornings could wake up at 3 and be fine but when I need to sleep, I need to sleep (even if that is 19.00!!)

But hang on a year? I had kind of convinced myself that after a few months they will be in a lovely little sleep pattern and all will be fine - pleeeeeaaaaase don't shatter my nice little illusion!!!

I am 28 weeks on Monday and while I know 12 weeks is nothing it still feels so very very long!!! (Am having a mini tantrum on the sofa as we speak) Doesn't help that every morning when DH wakes up he has a little hug and chat with the bump and ALWAYS asks it when it is coming out and tells it to hurry up!

Springy, My kicks are actually pretty high now too, normally about 2 inches below boobs to the right and no where near as strong as before so wondered if it might be hands and fists rather than feet - occasionally get a few thumps down below but not as regularly as before - will probably ask the MW about that on Monday as it has decreased quite a bit!

Re counting... I found out so early on in to the pregnancy (literally the day I was supposed to start my period) and have been counting from them but have been mainly counting down since 20 weeks (and those 8 weeks have taken a long time but think that is because nothing happens in that middle bit!). I think it till get really exciting at the end of jan when I am on single figures! Also read that from about 30-32 weeks the baby should turn and make it's way down (aaaaahhhhhh freaks me out no end!!)

I am off to my hospital today to try and decide where I want to give birth (maternity unit, ward, consultant care etc etc) and I am petrified I am going to see / hear someone give birth - I know that sounds really silly but to be honest it will really realky freak me out!

Boffin - I can't believe they did a naked calendar - it is wrong on so many levels!!!

brettgirl2 · 03/01/2009 10:16

I personally am finding it quite irritating whenever anyone gives me advice about baby (and tbh my mil isn't the worst for this). Perhaps I'm quite arsey but I just think that everyone is different and that you have to make your own way.

My least favourite pieces of advice/comments are:

  1. You'll change completely once the baby is born (thankfully my mother reassured me that she didn't)
  2. You won't be going on holiday in the summer then this year (say WHAT?? I realise that flying long haul is probably out but there are lots of other options)
  3. Buy xyz pram - great idea, only prob is that I have a tiny boot
It's like you are a complete imbecile just because you have not had a baby but I don't intend to entirely give up on life grrrrrr!

I'm 26 weeks tomorrow - completely agree about it dragging. As I didn't find out until I was 5 weeks I suppose that makes my pg a week shorter than yours bolat haha. Kicks are around belly button and some are enormous, clothes moving efforts. Baby has been going mad over the last couple of days - I went out last night with some friends and she was jumping up and down all night

MILs are a nightmare, mine's nice but she still does my head in. In fact I don't think that she is more annoying that my own mother, them main difference being that why my mother annoys me I tell her to butt out, whereas with my MIL I can't, so the annoyance kind of builds up.

BabyBolat · 03/01/2009 10:31

Ah Brettgirl, I know exactly what you mean!

The most annoying thing I find is when people say (normally with a kind of irritating know-it-all smirk)

  • You'll see, you'll think differently when the baby comes - like I am suddenly going to lose my mind. This normally follows my comment that I intend to be a working mother and keep progressing with a career even when I have a baby but apparently I will see!!! grrrr!! I get that my career will not be my number one priority but I didn't study my butt off and get where I am only to just give up and completely forget about it!

As for the holiday that is ridiculous - DH's parents are in Turkey and we will be flying out in June for a lovely long summer holiday with the baby because 1. it's important for his family to spend time with DH & bubs but 2. We will need a break together!

And with regard to the pram - you don't know what it will be like until you actually use it with a baby - everyone is different I have a Graco pram (that is fairly big and have to take the parcel shelf out to fit it in but it is the one DH wanted the most and to be honest I wasn't all that fussed with what we had!) and some people have reviewed it and said it is the best thing ever, others hate it!!

Bubs only kicks when there is no one else around really - just had a funny five minute party but all settled down again!

My MIL is great really, so very sweet, (very different to me and very very tactile which I find weird sometimes! FIL not so easy but still fine - My mum is very opinionated and flips from being the greatest mum ever to incredibly frustrating but think that is because we are quite similar! I can't really tell her to butt out as it would o down like a tonne of bricks but try and appease it by saying, Yeah I agree with you but DH has his heart set on X....

Ah you say that Brettgirl but I was bought forward a week following my 12 week scan so we are about equal methinks!

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