Jingle Bells, Mysterious Smells, Fab Feb 2009 babies will soon be on their way - Oh what fun it is to waddle around like an overstuffed turkey all day.

[dinkystinky]

Hello lovely ladies, the new thread is open for business

Herbgarden - that is really awful news. I feel so desperately sad for your secretary and her grand-daughters. Surestart sounds a good place to start to find out about support for the little one; also her GP surgery may be able to put her in support with the local authority who may do bereavement grants for similar such circumstances to help her get back on her feet (as going from 2 mouths to 4 mouths to feed must be a financial strain). They should also be able to arrange/offer bereavement counselling for the little ones and her - it sounds like they all might need someone to talk to after the shock. I'm sure there must also be some charities out there who help out families in similar such circumstances - maybe someone in the parenting forum may be able to recommend something?

thank you so much everyone for all the advice on self harming. Was a bit worried I was aiming wrong which was why it was stinging so much, guess I'll get used to it though.
Dinky, glad you had a lovely time in Copenhagen, its one of the cities on my list of places to go as it looks so beautiful.
Herbgarden, how awful for your poor secretary, what a terrible thing to have to deal with. At least she has a nice boss.
TBM, so glad you got past this milestone, fabulous news.
calico, sorry about your bad day and your MIL. Really sensible stuffing them full of sugar! Next time tell her she can have him overnight!
Ref hospital maternity clothes I won't have that issue in Saudi if I go back there to have baby. You get your own private room and I had to giggle last time they expected me to get out of bed after my CS to put my abaya (long black tent) on to see the doctor. Needless to say, I declined their kind request. twats!

Thanks all for your advice- I'm going to post on the forum tonight to see what I can find out but did have a look at the Sure Start web page earlier on. I suspect she might not have heard of the mumsnet website so I'd really like to be able to gather up some good advice for her and maybe even get her in touch with some people - I think right now that's more helpful than anything. It's hard when you don't know peoples personal circumstances that well (other than the day to day stuff we talk about at work) and you just don't want to offend by doing the wrong thing or interfering - she is quite a private person.

Our deputy managing partner (sits two desks up from me) when asked whether his secretary could chip in today with the work which had been left by my jobshare on Friday asked "When are we expecting her back ?" and ............what is wrong with some people.

herbgarden, some people are just total arses!
At my last firm one of the girls there found out her DP had leukemia. He was ill for a while and then had a bone marrow transplant and seemed better but sadly earlier this year he died. I flew back for the funeral and was absolutely gobsmacked when one of the partners from the firm made some awful comments (by the graveside) along the lines of 'well maybe she will come back to work a bit more now he has gone' and 'she has cost this firm thousands'. Evil f*ing cow! And the poor girl in question was a partner too, but a salaried one. I have never met such an evil person and its frightening to know she is a family lawyer and mediator. EVIL! (explains why I left!)

Thanks to everyone for posting their support. Have just got back from Day Assessment Unit and everything is looking fine, had to have an internal (yuk) and swab done for leakage but apparently everything looks normal so am back home and am gonna treat myself to a big bag of white maltesers to make up for the grotty day i've had

QK My dp said the same thing, that he thought I was 'too clean'. I thought the intimate wash was ok as it doesn't have soap in it. Will ask doc tomoz about all that too then.

herbgarden How awful! That poor family.

rosie Glad I misunderstood about the nightdress thing.
When I had ds, I got the huge maternity pads from mothercare,but they didn't have wings on so it didn't matter that they were thick enough to hold bleed as after about 10mins, the pad was halfway down my leg! I found always ultra super ones did the job just fine, and I bled v heavily for a whole 6 weeks.
My hospital last time had all that stuff so hoping they haven't changed in 18months.

pinkbabybump glad everything is ok.

herb some people are just outright mean, nasty and selfish aren't they? What an awful thing for the other secretary to say. I think it's wonderful that you are thinking so much of her and are willing to go out of your way to gather helpful info on her behalf. Just shows there are still some decent people out there. I'd hate to think what's going through her mind right now.

Glad to hear things are normal, pinkbabybump - bet it all seemed very real today.

herb - get her to contact her local authority - grandparents caring for young kids especially get financial support akin to foster carers.

mos - can't believe some people, and from a woman with her job?

Had a lovely evening watching Strictly results, but (I won't give it away) cant get over who went - [big glittery shocked emoticon]! Am now watching Take That and singing very loudly (poor John!)

On the subject of lady leakage etc, I'm a bit concerned about the (ahem) discharge I'm getting...It was like the EWCV I had when fertile, but now is more like I've sneezed from my bits - greeny and a very bogey like consistency. I first noticed it when very groggy at 2:30 the other morning and literally thought I'd blown my nose in my knickers! Anyone else familiar with this?

(I'm so not coming to the Jan meet-up now!)

I'm not sure where this fits in with insensitive comments, but it was so daft it actually made me laugh!

After our daughter's funeral, whilst we're still at the cemetery my OH went up to his RPG friend and asked about the game he'd missed "So what happened, have I died?" His friend didn't know where to put himself! He just said "I don't think this is the time to be discussing it"

Mrs ChristmasY I've heard that you can lose the plug bit by bit, but that it can re-form. Could it be that? I've always had discharge probs, in preg and out but not how your describing.
In the jan meet, we can all discuss this in public and clear some more room for ourselves if the place is busy........

TBM Must have just been the most awful day, funny what we say without even thinking.

That's a good description for the plug MrsY. On it's own it doesn't mean much, last pregnancy I lost mine 6 times starting from first trimester. If anything else (pain) happens then get yourself to triage to be checked over to be on the safe side.

evening everyone. Hope you are all well.

I had another bleed on Saturday so it was another trip to the hospital for me. They found blood traces in my urine but the cervix was closed so it is not coming from there and baby was moving all over the place so all was well in the end. They can not tell where the blood is coming from but told me not to worry..... (as if)

I am going to be 35 on Wednesday..... I am so old...

Oooh - sounds a bit worrying. Might give the midwife a tinkle tomorrow.

Loving the crimbly names!

has anyone else had any boob leakage? had some yesterday, was strange felt very embarrased dont know why was only at home with hubby but just felt incredibly un sexy all of a sudden! Been putting pads in my bra since does it happen all the way through does anyone know? And what about when you breastfeed does it happen then too?

lardy I had a bit of bleeding with ds. Is it possible it's coming from behind? Mine was with the first bleed. I was about 10 weeks and thought I was mc as it was quite alot. I hadn't been to the toilet or anything, but felt a bit damp (sorry TMI), went straight to hospital and they said same thing, they didn't think it was coming from front and were a bit stumped. Kept me there for about an hour and nothing else happened, we went home and it was then I realised it was coming from somewhere else.
The second time I was 33 weeks and got up in night to pee and wiped away some blood, back to hospital, put n monitor for half an hour, examined but there was no signs that I'd bled so they said it might just be change in pressure from the baby. Keep an eye though and get seen if anything else happens. Sure it'll be ok.

littlesez I didn't get any boob leakage with ds until after he was born, I gave up bf after 3 days, but would randomly leak for a few weeks until milk dried up. Remember to change pads often to minimise infections

herb thats awful

Latest list of due dates

• copy and paste from here and add yourself in ---

TinkerBellesMum - DC3 (girl), due: 01.02.09 (not expected to get far into December) (age 27, Birmingham)
Laidbackinengland - DC4, due: 23.01.09 (age 34, North Devon)
Nkweto - DC2, due: 30.01.09 (age 35, West London)
Oooggs - DC4, due: 30.01.09 (age 34, Cornwall)
Mamagoose - DC3, due: 31.01.09 (age 32, Spain)
idontbelieveit - DC2 (girl), due 02.02.09 (age 31, Leeds)
Questionkid - DC1, due: 03.02.09 (age 33, Wallington, Surrey)
PinkTulips - DC3, due; 04.02.09 (age 24, Roscommon, Ireland)
MsLucy - DC2 (a boy), due: 4/2/09 (CS a few days early)(age 38, North London)
Swampster - DC3, (a boy), due: 06.02.09 (age 40 , London)
Rosieposey - DC4, (a boy) due: 06.02.09 (age 36,Swindon,Wiltshire)
MarkStretch - DC2, (a boy) due: 07.02.09 (age 29, Norwich)
onwardandoutward - DC2, due: 07.02.09 (age 35 South West)
LittleMissNorty - DC2, due: 08.02.09 (age 40 in a couple of weeks, Kent).
KT1983 - DC1, due: 09.02.09 (age 25, London)
KazzaL - DC2 (suprise flavour), due 10.02.09 (age 35, Cirencester, Gloucs)
littleboyblue - DC2 (another boy), due 10.02.09 (age 26, Middlesex)
Sorkycake - DC4 (girl), due 10.02.09, (34, NorthEast)
jenniferturkington- DC2 (girl), due 11.02.09
herbgarden - DC2, due: 11.02.09 (CS 02.02.09) (age 38, Berkshire)
TheHouseofMirth - DC2, (a boy) due: 12.02.09 (age 38, Wimbledon)
Littlesez ? DC1 (a girl) due: 15.02.09 (age 28, Manchester)
America - DC2, (a boy) due: 16.02.09 (age 32, London)
Rachrox - DC4, (a boy) due: 18.02.09 (age 28, Cheltenham)
Catstar - DC2, (a boy) due: 18.02.09 (age 36, Chessington)
Dinkystinky - DC2, (a boy) due: 19.02.09 (age 32, London)
Pluto DC2 (gender unknown), due 19.02.09 (Age 38, Kent)
DizzyBrummie - DC2, due: 20.02.09 (age 36, Berkshire)
Calico1 - DC2 due: 21.02.09 (age 40, West Herts)
mrsy - DC1, (a girl) due: 22.02.09 (age 24, Maidstone, Kent
Scubagroover - DC1 (a boy), due: 22.02.09 (age 31, London/ Kent)
Winemakesmummyclever - DC2 (a boy), due: 23.02.09. (age 35, Manchester) expecting cs @ 39 weeks.
Spottyshoes - DC2, due: 24.02.09 (age 28)
Lardybump - DC2, due: 24.02.09 (age 34)
eejaykay - DC1 (a boy), due: 24.02.09 (age 34, London)
Chilledmama - DC2 (a girl), due: 25.02.09 (age 32, Southsea)
Pinkbabybump - DC2 (a girl), due 25.02.09 (age 36, Cornwall) CS booked for 20.02.09
Cocodrillo - DC3, due 26.02.09 (age 34 at the mo, London) expecting a CS at 38-39 weeks.
mumoverseas - DC4 (a boy), due: 28.02.09 (CS 2 to 3 weeks early) (age almost 41 Arabia/Crawley West Sussex)
Munteria - DC2 due 11.02.09 (age 37, Putney)
stacysmom - DC1 due 08.02.09 (age 36, Kent)
ihavenewsockson- DS2 due 26.02.09 (age 25, Surrey)
- end ---

Boob leakage very much depends on the mother. Some people don't leak at all. I leaked for England in the first few months of breastfeeding last time around (and recommend the lansinoh washable breastpads from the NCT catalogue...).

what then happens is that by 4-6 months, our bodies learn how to regulate supply and demand properly, so we stop leaking because we are producing just the right amount. So many women think they are no longer producing enough milk and give up

I'm hoping that being a tandem nurser will mean my body hasn't forgotten about supply and demand and I won't leak at all this time! [fingers crossed]

(and when I say leaked for England, I mean that if the baby came off the breast randomly during let down and I wasn't concentrating on quickly putting a muslin over it, a stream of milk would shoot 6 feet. Literally. It was astonishing. The Madonna of the Plentiful milk, me.)

Oh, Growing babies is on again. Catch up later or tomoz

littlesez, yes it's likely you will leak after your baby is born, though as OAO says not everyone does. I leaked so much in the first few months that I donated my spare milk to the milk bank and I didn't need to pump it I would just sit there with a jug under one breast while DS fed from the other. It's not as yucky as it sounds though, it's quite satisfying to know here's lots of milk there. You'll leak lots at night too probably so it's good to lie on a towel or one of those Pampers bed protector things.

I know I keep banging on about it but I really cannot recommend enough that all you propsepctive first time breast feeders find out as much as possible before your baby is born. When it goes well, breast feeding is the best thing in the world for you and your baby but sometimes it can be harder than expected and midwives are notoriously rubbish with BF help and advice so any preparation you can do is a really good idea. As you know there are quite a few of us still feeding our older ones and we'll always answer your questions but I found La Leche League meetings absolutely brilliant in terms of support and information and they welcome pregnant women at their meetings

OK, I'll get off my soapbox now.

Hi all. Lardy - sorry to hear you've had a worrying bleed again; great that all is well with the little one though and they've said not to worry. I know plenty of people who had random bleeds throughout their pregnancies and had healthy babies at the end of them - so try not to worry too much about it.... And 35 is not old! Hope you've got a nice day planned on Wednesday.

MrsChristmasY - I had that last time when pregnant with DS; the texture of your mucus can apparently change lots in pregnancy (including with diet would you believe it). If is green or smelly, see your doctor. If just looks like snot, dont worry about it too much - at least that's what the midwives and GP's told me last time round. And have plenty of pant liners to hand

Littlesez - re leaks; some people leak, others dont. May happen if you breast feed (happened to me a lot for the first couple of months - and like Onward, I would spray passersby if DS decided to bob off after the let down - amazing how far boob juice can travel!), may not. Do what you're doing and try and wear dark tops if worried about it. Happened to a friend of mine when she was pregnant with her first child - in a lawyers meeting when she was wearing a white shirt and had no jacket. She looked down and saw she'd leaked - and did the first thing she could think of - which was pick up the nearest glass of water and pour it over herself saying "oops, please excuse me - I've had an accident" and scarpered out of there. She didnt have any more leaking incidents after that - or in her subsequent pregnancy - so was probably just one of those things...

evening all, just got in from a very painful christmas concert at DD1's school. Thank god thats it for another year.
Sorry to hear about all the leaking that is going on. I'm guessing that our next thread title is going to involve leaking from somewhere or other as opposed to currys, cakes & smells?

Evening, hope everyone's bodily fluids are back on a more even keel now.

I am now the proud owner of a dozen BumGenii!

I got a message for you MOS from my support group:

"My thrombophellia (not sure if I spelled it right) said that I may give myself the shots anywhere, tummy, thighs, upper arms, or bottom, as longs as it is into the fat, not muscle, it is to go sub-que, which is under the skin.....not into the muscle but rather the fat...I have been doing so in the many different areas for the last 3 years just to give my tummy a break. I also will have to do these lovely shots 2 tiems a day for the rest of my life.. Oh well....I look at it like if I had to have insulin. Hope this helps. Take care and good luck."

A few people were told stomach, but mostly they've been told anywhere.

Will catch up with the thread in a bit, watching 4400 while I wait for credit for WoW

MrsY, if nothing has happened by tomorrow then it probably means that it's just one of those things. You pass the plug when the cervix has dilated enough that it's not holding onto it, so it's into labour.

littlesez it shouldn't happen too much before baby is born, afterwards it will happen until you're in a supply and demand routine. Not long usually.

lardy, what LBB said! I had quite a big bleed, obviously coming from there. I wasn't even constipated at the time, in fact I wasn't!

Just finished S4 E1. I have a house full of WoW playing friends and I have to surf and watch 4400 as I don't have any credit!

Someone please help me eat this ginormous bag of Maltesers!