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Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

Due Dec 08 -- Getting Ready for final push (in every sense!)

999 replies

Beans33 · 05/11/2008 16:28

Here's a new thread for us all lovely Dec Mums!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
jumpjockey · 14/11/2008 09:29

Effie - Oxford street? You're brave!! I've got a couple of gap maternity trousers and they're really comfy with big elastic waistbands [aaaahhhhhhh] but look quite funky still.

sorry to ask - what's GBS?

Amy123 · 14/11/2008 09:43

goodness this thread moves quickly - I can't keep up!
We will 2 weeks 6 days to go I have finally finished work - NOT looking forward to the drop in pay!!!
I have to go back for another scan on Monday - number 4 as at the last scan 2 weeks ago although the sonographer and the SHO said the placenta had moved enough when she went to get it signed off by the more senior doctor he wasn't happy and I have to go back for an internal scan and then possibly be booked for a c section.
Bizarre really as reading my notes on the placenta bit it says reaching OS - so why the sonographer told me anything different I do not know!
So it could be early as next Friday and therefore be a November baby! Although I wouldn't look forward to the actual procedure or the recovery time - being organised and knowing when it will be is a god send with a 6 year old and 4 year old!
Off to read all the posts now!
Speak soon
Anne

kayzisexpecting · 14/11/2008 09:58

The nappies have arrived!!! I hope as I'm helping the planet and mother nature they will repay the favour and let us have a decent summer next year!!!

Amy Next Friday!!! How exciting!! I can't believe we are so close to having our first arrivals.

jumpjockey · 14/11/2008 10:03

Finally managed to get through to the maernity reception - given that today's the 14th November, it's a bit worrying that having 3 tours a week of the mat unit, the first space they have is 18th December (ie a week after my due date!) Just how many december babies are there going to be?!

Definitely glad to be booked for HB now.

SummerLightning · 14/11/2008 10:11

jj I thought you went on a tour already?? Or did I dream that?
I was wondering if you would get on the tour to be honest yesterday but didn't want to worry you, as there was a girl on my antenatal course who was 38 weeks and couldn't get on one to look around.
To be honest I didn't think it was that useful. We couldn't go in the MLU as it was full, which was the bit I wanted to see. We also couldn't see the pool upstairs as it was being cleaned. A little worrying that MLU was full as they said that "november was quiet, but dec was going to be really busy"

Sorry I have been reading but not had time to post! Hopefully will do a proper catch up post later. Hope everyone is doing well.

Verso · 14/11/2008 10:24

jj am LOL at your DH. Hilarious. He will learn soon enough .

I can't decide today whether to be impressed by my DH's sweetness or annoyed by his naivety. He announced last night he's seriously considering giving up work completely when I go back next year . This isn't as crazy as it sounds as I'm a lot more senior than him workwise, and with wrap-around care for school as well as nursery we are going to be quite squeezed (not to mention the logistics of two potentially being off sick etc at any time and all the pick-ups and drop-offs being more complicated).

He asked me to work out our budget on my salary alone. I've been working on it this morning and it's really depressing.

He also wanted me to (get this) factor in (a) the cleaner and (b) 3 mornings of childcare a week. It just isn't possible on what I earn. This means I'd not only be out of the house 11 hours a day to earn what I could but also be cleaning the loo (my pet hate) at the weekend as he "can't do it to your standard" .

Oh well I guess it was a worthwhile exercise and reality check (cheque? ) for him...watch this space.

SummerLightning · 14/11/2008 10:36

My DH is the same, he keeps saying he's "jealous of me getting a long holiday". Though I suppose working and trying to put as much into it as you did before you had a screaming baby keeping you up all night is going to be quite hard as well.

Verso does your DH work part time or full time at the moment?

On a related subject. My DH works from home, for himself. He has been investigating getting space in an office but this is expensive. Do all you experienced people think it would be possible for him to work in the house while there is a small baby there? I think I would have to be quite strict with myself about not disturbing him while he was working but I am not sure how well this will work in reality??

kayzisexpecting · 14/11/2008 10:46

My DH thought I was getting a 6 month 'holiday' when I had DS. He soon learnt he was very wrong.

SL Not really experienced in working from home etc. But you could always give it a go. See how well it works and then if it doesn't work very well he can look for an office

My DH works shifts. He does a week of 7-3 then a week of 3-11 and I'm worried about the baby waking him during the night when he has to be up early and then waking him too early after he has been at work until 11pm. Though depending on timing he could have 4 weeks of work as the factory he works in shuts for 2 weeks over xmas.

Verso · 14/11/2008 10:52

My DH works full time at the moment. Part time is where it gets tricky because the cost of part time childcare is almost as expensive as full time, so you end up not actually making any money. Also his school are REALLY rubbish at allowing people to go part time in any case!

SummerLightning · 14/11/2008 10:56

Yeah, was going to suggest part-time but guessed that might be the case re it all being more expensive than it worth.
Is he a teacher? Is there any way he could give up work but do the odd bit of supply teaching here and there, or would that not pay for the childcare required to cover it?

lal07 · 14/11/2008 11:16

Morning all
jj LOL at your DH's idea of a holiday. Have to say one of biggest shocks of becoming a parent was that holidays don't really exist any more. V nice to be in sunnier place but you basically are changing nappies/chasing round after DC in slightly different environment rather than lounging around reading and drinking cocktails. DH and I had a couple of v romantic trips to venice around about this time of year. Sigh will be many years before we can do that again.

But still. Am getting v excited about seeing new baby.

SL my sister and her DH had similar situation re: working from home. He was v disciplined in coming down at lunch time etc. and keeping to proper working day. Worked very well for them (his office is still based next to home 3 DCs later). My sister is very good about not asking him to just look after them for a bit while she showers/goes on Mnet/sleeps - not sure I could be but you're probably better!

mibbes am having acupuncture this time - I was induced with DS and would rather avoid if possible (mainly because I'm impatient and want a HB - experience was fine). Apparently there's been a big study done in New Zealand showing that having acupuncture from 36 weeks helps to prepare body for birth and shortens labour. More likely to be born around due date too.
This is where I'm going. Is really lovely - same place helped with hyperemesis.

Having said that I'm great believer in babies coming when they're ready. I tried every single remedy last time and would say to really steer clear of castor oil - made me hideously sick which when you're that pregnant is a truly gruesome experience.

EffiePerine · 14/11/2008 11:16

SL: DH works from home and has done since just before DS was born. We're in a tiny flat so it is stressful for him, but manageable! I think the essentials are:

  • a place for him to work which you do not disturb and which (ideally) is kept clear of baby stuff (DH works in the main room, I have a quick clearout before I leave in the morning so he isn't working with dirty pots and clothes or toys strewn on the floor)
  • getting your DC and their carer (whether you or cm etc.) out of the house or in another area of the house for prolonged periods. Again, small flat so if Dh is working and I'm at home with DS we go out in the mornign, back for lunch, then out again in the afternoon. 3 days a week he's at the CMs 8:30 - 6 which is when DH gets his real work done.

It works really well for us as DH can do the drop offs and collections at the CMs and be more flexaible than me in case of emergency.

It may also be helpful for him to have a place he can use for meetings. DH is rejoining a members club in Central London in teh New Year so he somewhere to meet clients and even do some work if things are hectic at home. Much cheaper than renting office space (a few hundred a year). HTH - if you need any more info I'll grill DH when I get home

EffiePerine · 14/11/2008 11:18

Verso: can you negotiate with your DH and get him down to p/t? I would say that if he was not working at all I'd cut down on the paid childcare a lot (say to one day a week) and keep the cleaner. Obv you need to work it out between you - sounds like he has decided what he wants to do and thinks you can make it work! As you know, it aint quite like that in a relationship .

Flumpybumpy · 14/11/2008 11:23

Last day at work today yippeeeeee!!! Then baby on wednesday, it's all getting very exciting

EffiePerine · 14/11/2008 11:25

Coo Flumpy, you haven't left much time! Enjoy your last day

poisondwarf · 14/11/2008 11:31

Welcome Cat - another Hackneyite here (for now at least). Had DS at the Homerton and will be having this one there as well. There are a few of us round here and as Turnip said we did have a local meet-up in Clissold Park a couple of months ago. I can't make the London meet-up next week either and won't be around for the next week or two but would be up for meeting up for a coffee or something locally after I get back (which will be about the 25th) if anyone's interested. Actually Effie if you're still off on Wednesdays I will be around Wed 26th.

Turnip aw thanks - you're lovely too! N London post-baby meet-up sounds good. Good news about your friend btw. Oh and thanks for the Lucy Ewing link ages ago - had forgotten about that particular Poison Dwarf (in fact had been meaning to remind myself where it came from - it was an ex-fling's not-so-affectionate nickname for me but I kinda liked it).

pixsix your move sounds like a nightmare. Have you managed to get hold of a mattress at least? Also Twiga - your damp situation sounds horrible. We stayed a couple of nights in a damp flat a week or two ago and it had me and DS coughing & wheezing, so it must be awful for you & the kids to be living in it.

kmp1/Veggie/jj slower weight gain/getting slimmer in last month? It certainly wasn't my experience last time - I looked quite normal apart from the bump for the first 8 months then just ballooned in the last few weeks. This time I've looked like I've been inflated with a bicycle pump for most of the pregnancy so God knows what I'm going to look like by the birth. hungryhorse I am also suddenly ravenous all the time. I cannot get food into me fast enough. Just go with the flow is what I say, and as Veggie said try & eat filling carbs rather than skimping and trying to get away with just bits of fruit. I know it's not always easy to lose the weight afterwards but if your body's telling you you need more then that's how your body's designed to prepare for the baby and breastfeeding - try not to feel guilty and just enjoy!

traceface about recognising contractions when you get one - I must admit I didn't! I was having pains from about the Monday & gave birth on the Saturday night, and there was no Eastenders moment where I clutched my belly and knew labour had started. By about 10pm on Friday night it idly occurred to me to measure how far apart the pains were and that's when I realised they were regular and actually getting closer together. No idea when that started though - in fact I've been meaning to start a thread on how you work out how long your labour was (people always ask) cos I really haven't a clue! All those with DCs already - what point do you count as the beginning of your labour?

JollyBear I used mainly Bambino Mio wraps & nappies, with fleece liners. Dead easy to use & quick to dry. I had a few other types as well but they were the ones we used the most. IIRC you can get a starter pack of 5 nappies plus wrap(s) - I got mine off ebay, from a shop rather than 2nd hand. Can't remember the name of the shop but it seemed to do a lot of special offers (I think I got mine half price). Having said that though, I don't think any of them were particularly cheap, including the 2nd hand ones.

Verso oh dear - sounds like DH is in trouble. I must say the "not to your standards" bit would be like a red rag to a bull to me (even if it is true). Perhaps you could agree to pay the childcare & cleaning costs - but pay them to him? I know your DH has health problems but it does sound like he puts an awful lot of pressure on you sometimes. As you say, it might be time for a reality check!

Summer working from home with a newborn certainly wouldn't have been possible in our flat because it's so tiny. It would depend on the size and layout of your place I think - don't see any reason why it couldn't work in theory.

Sounds like we are going to get some humungous babies on this thread! Can't believe we'll be getting some baby action around here in the next week.

Thanks for the replies about urine samples/antenatal classes/bleeding gums the other day. I asked about the urine sample thing at the hospital & they said they only test you if you have symptoms of something. Hardly reassuring.

My maternity leave got off to a dramatic start on Wednesday - I suddenly got visual disturbances which I know can be a sign of pre-eclampsia, and pretty soon I couldn't see the screen in front of me. Decided I'd better go into the hospital to get my BP checked. Anyway, it was all fine in the end - nothing wrong with me or the baby and they just said it was probably over tiredness or anxiety and that I should rest. I was a bit narked though when I read the notes later. There was no mention of the visual disturbances, just that I felt a bit dizzy & faint (I did a little bit but that's not why I went in) and that I now felt better after having something to eat!

Seems a lot of you are dying to get the babies out - am I the only one who is in no hurry whatsoever? I really feel like I haven't been able to enjoy this pregnancy properly and focus on it cos I've just been too knackered with working & DS until now. I want to spend some quality time with DS before the new arrival as well. And as this may well be my last pg I want to savour it. Also I'm well aware that this bit, uncomfortable though it is, is the calm before the storm and need a couple of weeks of rest & eating properly (now that I don't have to rely on DP so much for food shopping & cooking) to prepare myself. Didn't cope at all well with DS as a newborn (feeding problems) and I want to get myself physically and psychologically prepared.

Anyway, sorry to drag the thread down again but it wasn't good news for my brother. The cancer's back and he'll be having an operation a few days before I'm due. He's having a scan on Monday to see if there's evidence of spreading, and from there they'll decide what treatment to give him apart from the op. My dad is apparently deteriorating too. Still in London at the moment - hospital advice on Wed was to rest, so I've been doing that (well that and eating) and will be going up to Lancs tomorrow.

mibbes · 14/11/2008 11:38

Oh dear I hadn't realised I had to eat so many - of course labour will start if you eat 7 a day, you'll be permanently on the loo so I guess it would have the same effect as curry ! I bought 5 - one for each day next week. Och well I love them anyway and all that fruit can't do the wee one any harm ! Thanks for the advice Effie and kayz. kayz I am more surprised that we haven't had a birth on this thread yet - am so excited to see who is first... maybe this weekend... TBH after your sore back and BH yesterday I wondered if you'd be first

Lal07 that acupuncture place looks great - pity I'm in Scotland . I may look into finding somewhere local though, good idea !

LOL my DP seems to think that because I'm on ML he can sit back and let me do all of the household chores - he was put straight on that the other night and reminded that he'll probably have to do the majority of the chores once baby is here (for a wee while anyway !). It is hilarious that you are supposed to be on ML to relax and prepare for baby but men seem to think you are off to do the housework ! Admittedly there are lots of nesting jobs I want to do but am not here to cook him gourmet dinners and wash his pants !

Ooh my cosatto nursing pillow just arrived - it has a lovely cosy fleecey cover - baby will love cuddling into it

mibbes · 14/11/2008 11:40

sorry x-post pd, so sorry to hear about your brother and poor you with visual disturbances . Look after yourself xx

poisondwarf · 14/11/2008 11:48

I hear you mibbes - DP took advantage of day 1 of my mat leave yesterday to have a nice long lie-in while I got DS fed & dressed. Cheers love! This morning he looked at me hopefully when DS woke up. A raised eyebrow was enough to get him slinking out of bed though.

TheInvisibleHand · 14/11/2008 12:36

SL DH works from home and has done since before DD was born. As others have said, part of it is about space - DH has an office at the top of the house and DD and I tended to hang out downstairs, so it gave him relatively little excuse to wander down. Both of you have to be a bit disciplined - I had a C-section last time and definitely relied on DH to help quite a bit when first home from hospital. We both had to make an effort to get out of that pattern so that he could get on and work. Once I finished maternity leave it was easier as DD and her carer tend to do their own thing. It is handy for me though as DH is always around if there is a problem.

poisondwarf - so sorry to hear you are having a hard time. I do hope the scan news on Monday is better for your brother. Do also look after yourself.

I do know what you mean about not being in too much of a hurry to get the baby out - I keep assuming its going to be late, have no idea what I'll do if it decides to show up early!

CatDean · 14/11/2008 12:55

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CatDean · 14/11/2008 13:03

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SummerLightning · 14/11/2008 13:28

PD sorry to hear about your brother

And hope that the visual disturbance stuff was nothing to worry about.

Cheers for advice all on homeworking stuff. DH is super disciplined about going in his office and staying in there apart from for lunch, and even sometimes not even that! I don't know where he gets his motivation from sometimes! It is me that there is to worry about really!! If he can hear me getting stressed about stuff and making noise it will disturb him and he will get annoyed!(I have a tendency to have tempers to myself that are not quiet if things go wrong or I can't find things, which I'm sure they will if I have had no sleep and am trying to do stuff with a baby) So I will have to try and not do that!

He has a seperate office that has no baby stuff in it (as yet) and shouldn't do, so in that respect it should be ok.

I would like to defend the male race briefly and say that my DH is vvv good with housework. But I am super slovenly and he knew this when he married me....so I guess this is the key....he has a lower mess threshold than me! . I am actually feeling guilty as he has done pretty much everything recently even though I had Weds off work. Tonight I AM going to tidy up! Don't mean to make you all though as he does have his faults but not in that respect.

cat the heart monitor thing sounds a good idea, just to set your mind at rest from time to time!

poisondwarf · 14/11/2008 13:33

Cat sounds good, although thinking about it it will probably be a teensy weensy meet-up (i.e. you and me, unless Effie is coming along). There were 5 of us at Clissold but I think it's just me & Effie still posting on here regularly (anyone seen lowrib and sunshine185 about lately?).

Shouldn't think it'll be too restful at my mum's - she's not exactly forward at helping out with childcare & is the queen of the empty cupboard, so I'm under no illusions about being pampered while I'm there. However I'm hoping to get in a couple of nights in the Lakes or Yorkshire Dales next weekend as it's my birthday [decrepit emoticon].

Verso · 14/11/2008 13:54

PD your Mum sounds like mine . Sorry to hear about your brother and Dad. I wish it was better news.

For what it's worth, now it's getting so close I'm panicking I haven't got enough time before the baby comes! I'm off to get my last haircut this afternoon (voice of doom here)... but not hugely looking forward to it for some reason. Just feeling a bit like I want to hibernate. (Just watch me -I'll crawl behind the sofa in a mo and start shredding newspapers .)

DH has mooted the possibility of going to 3 days a week - which in fact when you go into the sums (I've been busy with my abacus today!) does make some sense... just not sure if his school will swallow it!

Really wish I could come to the meet up next week. Anyone fancy arranging another for those of us who can't make it?

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