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Birth clubs

Connect with mums-to-be with similar due dates to share experiences and support.

Due June 08 - Creme egg season is over, summer is now here, so time to tidy the ladygarden before the big day

989 replies

bitofadramaqueen · 04/05/2008 10:23

I wonder how quickly we'll get through this thread?!?!?!?!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
systemsaddict · 13/05/2008 14:25

For anyone nervous about labour, I absolutely second what Peartart said. Try not to worry about it - yes it hurts but it's a very different experience from 'just' being in pain. My first labour sounds bloody horrible on paper but in fact was manageable all the way through, with support from midwives and access to good pain relief when I needed it, and was absolutely worth every second. I am hoping this one will be easier but if it isn't, so be it. I was so struck talking to mums at the postnatal groups I went to last time that everyone had such different stories, but everyone got through it - and it's very empowering afterwards to think, I did that!!

Neenz I'm so glad you're having such a lovely time with the twins, fingers crossed the good sleeping continues for you!

systemsaddict · 13/05/2008 14:30

AmberC - I'd check with your midwife when you see her tomorrow - she will be able to advise you based on your whole clinical situation and history.

goingfor3 · 13/05/2008 14:41

I agrewe with systemsaddict and peartart, labour is very painful but well worth it. It is a great feeling when you look at your baby and think I made this!!! I try to remember that with every contraction, the stronger the pain the closer I am to meeting my baby.

Neenz, really sounds like things are going well for you! Both of my girls used to stock feed in the evening especially dd2, sometimes for 3 or 4 hours at a time. I thought it was unusal until my firend told me her dd's did the same.

bitofadramaqueen · 13/05/2008 14:58

Hi everyone,

Too many posts to comment on - I'm also shattered after a rubbish night's sleep so its hard to concentrate. I'm working from home today so might go and have a nap instead.

Still a bit sore walking around but starting to feel a bit better.

Had my ante-natal class today - much better than usual as mad as a brush midwife replaced by nice health visitor (who sadly doesn't cover my area) who did a session on what they do, handy tips about looking after your baby etc. All very friendly and practical. I do like my NCT classes but sometimes they focus more on the 'magical empowerment' than useful practical stuff so this was really useful.

Neenz great to hear your stories - you are clearly loving being a mother!!!!

Re: labour - dont get me wrong, I'm nervous as hell about it but haven't started panicking yet. I just keep thinking that if squillions of other women can do it then I certainly can manage.

OP posts:
xxgemmalou22xx · 13/05/2008 15:05

i aint got time to be scared about labour im just too excited lol i may only have a weeek left now because if my baby has grown lots when i have a scan a week today ill be started off so imm all buzzing and excited about it wooooooooooooo

sophiewd · 13/05/2008 15:06

I love knowing when my baby is coming (around 10am on Thursday 19th June unless there are any emegencies) has made sorting out Edie easier and B&B.

Just back from midwife and she said she is glad that I am having a section as she predicts that if I try VBAC then would probably have endedup in emergency one ( I trust her implicitly with her 30+ years experience) all is well he is just big.

alipalli · 13/05/2008 15:28

Hi all,

Just watched the teen Mum programme on the BBC iplayer here if anyone has an hour to spare. The home water birth with 5 generations of women is quite something: impressive and alarming at the same time.

Breast feeding class this morning. It was ok, although they played a video showing new borns whose Mum's had had pethidine and those that hadn't. The pethidine babies were terribly dopey and couldn't find the breast which was really sad. I haven't ruled out pethidine for me, but it did feel like a bit of a major guilt trip.

Parofleurmapu · 13/05/2008 15:29

Hello!

Im out of hospital and no baby to report as of yet which im glad about as id prefer her to come when she wants if theres no medical reason.

BP stabilised in hospital even has been 110/60 which is really low for me .They did loads of tests and scans which were all fine, They think that its just certain times when it goes up (normally if i walk around for a bit etc) and they think its cause medication tries to cope but cant always

Basically i have to be on near enough complete bed rest and if it is high and stays high even after being on left hand side for half an hour, then i have to go back in. So bed all day and night for me maybe for 4 more weeks!
one thing though she was engaged and head down but is now breech with legs happily kicking my bladder!!Dr said still bit if time for her to turn round. So not going to worry just yet,
Have obstretician appt this eve so will discuss things more with her.

Glad to be back home now know that spanish hospital food if awful and the care is good but theres no place like home

have skimmed posts too mucg to answer personally but CONGRATS NEENZ , glad alls well. Off to sleep speak soon xxx

makecakesnotwar · 13/05/2008 15:31

Graduated
DD29/05/08 - neenz, esther and theo

Still waiting:
Early June - Kif -(DC3)
29/05/08 - goingfor3 -(2 dds, 4 and 6, mc july) BOY!
29/05/08 - makecakesnotwar -(1st baby, mc June 07)GIRL!!
29/05/08 - katyjo -(1 ds 20 months)
31/05/08 - systemsaddict -(1 ds 1YO) GIRL
31/05/08 - lazylou -(1 DD 3.9/ MC September 04)
01/06/08 - laughinglil -(3YO twins)
01/06/08 - Trix11 -(DS and DD)
01/06/08 - alipalli -(1st baby)
03/06/08 - paromapu -(first baby)a girl will be called Fleur
05/06/08 - Tizzwizz -(MC June)
05/06/08 - emotionalwreck
05/06/08 - aberdeenhiker -(DS, June 06)
05/06/08 - Josey -(1 DS8yo, 1 DD2yo)GIRL
05/06/08 - mistermoo -(DD5, DS3)
06/06/08 - Calebsmum -(DC2)
06/06/08 - supperwoman -(DC2)
06/06/08 - nettiehay -(first baby)
06/06/08 - Lucy0608 -(1st Baby)
07/06/08 - Debinaustria -(2 ds's 8 and 6)BOY
07/06/08 - mellymel -(DS 14 months)
07/06/08 - dylansluckymum -(1DS 23 mos) BOY!
07/06/08 - Rolf -(2 dss 8 and 6, 1dd 2) GIRL
10/06/08 - basilbrush -(1 DS Feb 06, 2 m/cs 2007)
11/06/08 - thegreenfairy -(first baby)
12/06/08 - Pregnant Penguin -(1st baby) BOY
12/06/08 - essie3 - (first baby)
13/06/08 - tassisssss -(ds aged 4, dd 15 mths)
14/06/08 - Deese20 -(1st Baby)
14/06/08 - PearTart - (DD1 is 19 months) GIRL
15/06/08 - Jules43 -(1st baby)
15/06/08 - sybilvimes -(2 dc)Boy!!
16/06/08 - xxgemmalou22xx (first Baby)
17/06/08 - GardenAngel4 -(DD 7months)
18/06/08 - Josie57 -(ds1 13 months, mc sep 07)
18/06/08 - hedgehog1979 -(first baby)
19/06/08 - Pyjamarama -(BOY)
20/06/08 - babyalfie -(got 3 DC - 16, 14 & 7)
20/06/08 - ernest -(got 3 dc - 8, 7 & 4) will be sectioned on 06/07/08
20/06/08 - poppy34 -(2 m/c, one ds lost at 21 weeks) (GIRL)
20/06/08 - whinegums - (first baby) BOY
21/06/08 - HeyBaby07 -(First Baby)
21/06/08 - Hoggle -(First Baby)
21/06/08 - needahand -(DC2) (boy)
21/06/08 - Wigeon -(First Baby)
22/06/08 - Upsidedowncake -(1DS 27 m, ep Aug 07) GIRL
22/06/08 - bitofadramaqueen -(first baby)
22/06/08 - august26bride -(First Baby)
22/06/08 - splodgesmum -(m/c twins April '06, m/c Oct '06, all IVF pgs) Boy!
22/06/08 - ktpie -(first baby)
23/06/08 - looneytune -(DS 4 yrs) BOY
24/06/08 - puddock -(first baby)
26/06/08 - LauraT (first baby)
26/06/08 - Claphamkitten -(first baby)
27/06/08 - sophiewd -(DD 22 months) section booked on 19th June
30/06/08 - capricornqueen appt-(DD 2yrs)
30/06/08 - Kittyjimjams -(2 MC)
Gemzooks - EDD???

Upsidedowncake · 13/05/2008 15:32

Welcome back Paro, and sorry that you have been precribed bed rest. So glad that they are taking care of you properly. 110/60

makecakesnotwar · 13/05/2008 15:37

Thought I'd update the list....can you tell I have litera\lly nothing left to do until I'm admitted tomorrow night? DH and I are going out to dinner later for a last supper.

alipalli- was put off pethidine in NCT class when one of our ladies, who is a nurse, heard which drug was given to the babies on birth to bring them round. She said that's what they give druggies who overdose....she was also horrified at how large a dse of pethidine ladies in labour are given. Epidural here I come

Amberc- check with midwife...might your discharge be a show? I must admit, I'm tempted to get DH into bed to get things going, but whilst the mind is willing, the SPD is killing me...will have to wait for when I'm done BFing

Speaking of which, oh supermum and horny pregnant lady neenz, are you back at it yet?? [cheecky cackle]

makecakesnotwar · 13/05/2008 15:38

Glad you are back Paro. Thinking of you whilst you take it easy...we think it's hot here...I'm surprised you aren't comatose!

thegreenfairy · 13/05/2008 15:51

Amberc - my MW suggested 'making love' while IN LABOUR the other week to pass the time!!!
So I would of course check with your MW but I think your friend may be worrying too much?

Had an email this afternoon from my friend who was due end of April. She developed really bad obstetric cholestitas (sp?) and ended up being induced at 40+2, even though her waters had broken that morning

Unfortunately she had a terrible time - pessary, hormone drip, 12 hours to get to 3cms, another 20 to get to 10cms, back to back baby, sick from pethidine, strapped to monitor, two hours of struggling to push through epidural when (and finding it impossible) ventouse and forceps and a big episiotomy. She is very traumatised and saying she'll never have another baby again
I feel so sorry for her. And I REALLY don't get why they induced her when her waters had just gone - literally four hours after they broke. It makes me so mad when hospitals don't give women a chance to go into labour naturally. Knowing her (she is v timid and shy) she probably just went along with it without question but (and I know I'm not qualified) everything I've read makes me think they should have given her a bit of a chance. Esp as the advice on OC has changed and now induction isn't viewed as necessary.

Anyway, her son is lovely, and she is on the mend now, but it sounds like her first couple of weeks were not good . Am going to see her next week.

needahand · 13/05/2008 15:59

Hi Ladies

I am back from my (disastrous) holidays. Have I missed much apart from the fact there is a new thread. Anything exciting? Any babies. I can't catch up on all the posts otherwise I would still be here at the end of this week!

needahand · 13/05/2008 16:01

Oh my god! I have just read Neen had her babies! Congrats Neen. I will go back in the thread to see how it all went. You must be so over the moon (albeit tired)!

aberdeenhiker · 13/05/2008 16:21

For any first-timers, I agree with everyone who's said to try not to worry about the birth. I'm coming from a bit of a different perspective though as I did not have a good birth with DS in terms of pain. But a week after, when I was home and healing with a healthy baby it didn't matter at all. Now I'm very anti-natural birth propaganda that says we can all have completely natural births - some of us can't, but hopefully all of us will come home with healthy babies and that should be all that matters.

(greenfairy - I had the opposite experience from your friend - too much emphasis on natural birth led to me being traumatized by the pain. Once I had my epidural, things got much better. I also said I'd never have another - but we changed our minds because it was just a short bit of hell for the absolute joy of having my son).

sophiewd · 13/05/2008 16:25

Needahand - wlcome back and why disastrous?

Makecakes - if I don't get on here tomorrow really good luck to you.

ErnestTheBavarian · 13/05/2008 16:36

AH - are you there? I have a hotslings Q

Neenztwinz · 13/05/2008 16:42

I second what aberdeenhiker said about natural birth - I too was taken in by how wonderful it is and how easy childbirth should be, but when it was happening to me I was like 'bloody hell, this is awful - give me the epidural!' I'm glad now that I didn't have one but I still ended up with forceps. My little sis had an epidural so was asleep through lots of the 1st stage, then the epi wore off and she pushed her baby out - no stitches needed! That sounds the perfect compromise but unfortunately you can't plan for that to happen cos anything could happen.

Also I agree that after the event you are so proud at what you have achieved, you feel like you have joined a club or something, so it is all well worth it. So embrace it ladies!

greenfairy, that's terrible what happened to your friend. They should have let her go at least 24 hours before medically inducing her. It's not right that you should have to read loads of books and be very assertive to stop the docs from treating you like something that needs to be processed.

I had my first traumatic baby-change experience today - Esther projectile pooed all over me. I am telling you it squirted about a foot right from her bum onto my top and jeans and onto the floor!! She's a really good crappere

needahand · 13/05/2008 16:52

Sophied: first two days taken with the SIL drama (she is still in hospital at the moment, not progressing much, won't acknowledge she has a pb, says she will stop medication as soon as out of hospital). Hence a lot of long disucssions into the night and a very knackered needahand. When we finally got to our holiday destination, I started to feel really rather sick, couldn't breathe just like when there is a cat in the room (I am border asthmatic and cats trigger a massive reaction). Turns out the accomodation where we stayed allows owners to take their pets with them and do not segregate those rooms or that of smokers. And because it was rather dirty there must have been months (years?) of pet incrusted hair. Each time we were going back to the flat I had a more severe reaction, so we had to leave (can't take any allergy tablets at the moment). The problem is that it is bank holidays season in France at the moment. So we then found a nice hotels for two days but after that everything was booked. Still managed to find a nice looking B&B, only the mattresses were so old you could feel every single spring. My husband can normally sleep anywhere but he coulnd't even sleep. So when fed up at 3 in the morning he suggested we got home, I could have leaped with joy. We came home five days early. And it felt like all I did during my "holiday" was not sleep and pack and unpack bags and travel in the car.

Neen: lol at projectile pooh, welcome to the wonderful world of motherhood, just you wait for projectile vomit, even better.

systemsaddict · 13/05/2008 17:06

I really wanted to do the whole thing without drugs last time, having been rather sucked in by things like the video allipalli talks about and lots of reading of Sheila Kitzinger-style natural birth books. This meant that I refused a Meptid injection at a point where it would have been REALLY useful for me to get a couple of hours' sleep and Meptid was the only way I would have got it, and I only agreed to the epidural, reluctantly and feeling guilty, a couple of hours after I really needed it. Once the epidural was in my experience was transformed. Without it I would definitely have ended up completely exhausted, probably more traumatised than empowered, and having a section anyway as I couldn't have done second stage without it (as it was he was a forceps delivery - there was no way he would have got out without some assistance).

I am now MUCH more of the opinion that we are incredibly fortunate to have access to these relatively safe forms of pain relief. It's wonderful if you can give birth without them of course, and being informed about active birth etc helps a lot, but much of the time it's more a matter of luck, size and positioning of baby. I felt for a long time like I had slightly 'failed' in not having the lovely 6 hour water birth that some of my friends have, which is ridiculous. EVERYONE who has had a baby is a hero, however they've done it! And me and ds both thrived after the birth, and he had no trouble finding my breast at all, despite me having had every drug going!

Sorry for rant! I just get a bit at the guilting that is associated in some material (not all by any means, but some) with the use of pain relief. Ultimately we're very lucky to have these choices - so long as they remain OUR choices.

goingfor3 · 13/05/2008 17:15

nnedahand, so sorry your holiday was not good . Hopefully your sil will be more compliant and realise she has a problem once the drugs have really kicked in.

I had pethedine about an hour before giving birth to dd2 and found it really fantastic. It really helped me relax (fall asleep) inbetween contractions. DD2 had no prblems feeding and was feeding really well about 15 mins after delivery. You really just have to go with whats best for you and never feel like a faliure because you didn't have the experience you expected.

alipalli · 13/05/2008 17:30

Thanks for the words of wisdom neenz, systemsaddict and goingfor3 (and anyone else I have forgotten). I haven't done this before, so can have no real idea about what it's actually going to be like on the day itself. Whilst being informed ahead of time is really important, making a load of rules for myself surely only makes the whole thing more difficult, and more likely to result in disappointment and a stupid sense of "failure".

sophiewd · 13/05/2008 17:37

Needahand - it sounds awful and poor you for your SIL as well. My frinds cousin was statemented (schizo) and was on medication the came of it and didn't take her medication sadly she died a few months ago. She broke of all contact with her family.And such a difficult time for you and your DH. Hopefully you will be able to rest now before you become a mummy

aberdeenhiker · 13/05/2008 17:56

Ernest - I'm here - what's your hotslings question...

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