August 2021 Babies - Final evictions and the fourth trimester

[BertieBotts]

Time for a new thread! :)

29 gorgeous new babies have joined us already, welcome to the world 💖💙🥳

@Smurf123 - Welcome to the world, baby Sophia 💖
@wimbler - Welcome to the world, baby boy 💙
@Jessicapebbles - Welcome to the world, baby Ebony💖
@Inmypjsagain - Welcome to the world, baby boy💙
@PurplePansy05 - Welcome to the world, baby Leo Alexander 💙
@WinterBabyof89 - Welcome to the world, baby Rosie 💖
@Winecoffeeteamum - Welcome to the world, baby Emily 💖
@Ready2020 - Welcome to the world, baby Rowan 💖
@Magik01 - Welcome to the world, baby Isaac 💙
@Hoares3 - Welcome to the world, baby Ellis 💙
@Daffodil21 - Welcome to the world, baby Elliot James 💙
@sarah13xx - Welcome to the world, baby Freddie 💙
@MrsB2019x - Welcome to the world, baby Ella💖
@Biscuitcat - Welcome to the world, baby Rowan 💙
@Whatshouldbemyusername - Welcome to the world, baby Arya-Nyah 💖
@notinthestarsigns - Welcome to the world, baby Erin 💖
@Aaaaa1519 - Welcome to the world, baby Anum 💖
@Angelesque - Welcome to the world, baby Isaac 💙
@Millymay13 - Welcome to the world, baby Ethan Benjamin 💙
@WolfMother326 - Welcome to the world, baby Alasdair William 💙
@BertieBotts - Welcome to the world, baby Alexander 💙
@RandomCatGenerator - Welcome to the world, baby Solomon 💙
@lucyrp - Welcome to the world, baby Evelyn Rose 💖
@HopefulB - Welcome to the world, baby Chloé 💖
@Mmr224 - Welcome to the world, baby Alasdair 💙
@Smallbean27 - Welcome to the world, baby boy 💙
@Fran919 - Welcome to the world, baby girl 💖
@Caz1226 - Welcome to the world, baby Dougie 💙
@Ava50x - Welcome to the world, baby boy 💙
@dirtyfries - Welcome to the world, baby Frankie! 💖

Counting down until till they welcome their munchkins:

@Dia12 - EDD 8 August, Girl 💖
@livingwithbees - EDD 16 August, surprise 💛
@Sheisfee - EDD 19 August, Girl 💖
@Alittlexmasmagic - EDD 22 August, surprise 💛
@LottSE20 - EDD 22 August, surprise 💛
@ame88 - EDD 28 August, Girl 💖

@Magik01 I've not much love left for anyone today, but whatever I have left, I am sending to you Let's brace ourselves for tonight! xx

I am so glad to know I'm not the only one occasionally losing my shit when things are getting ridiculous, not many people talk about this openly and instead they project this zen image to the outside world...whereas my current status is zen, my arse! 🤷🏼‍♀️ xx

Definitely in the same boat as lots of others on here tonight with the screaming 🤦🏼‍♀️ Every single night just now he starts the screaming and refuses to sleep from 6-9ish. I’ve tried putting him down for naps during the day so he doesn’t get over tired but it doesn’t seem to work. Tomorrow I’m getting up at 7am I’ve decided and following the gina Ford routine to the letter just so I don’t then blame myself for not trying everything possible

DH is grating on me 🤦🏼‍♀️ He is doing a good job on the whole but comes in from work then wants to go a run, have a shower etc, I say this is fine but then when it comes to dinner Freddie will start crying and it’s like he has tunnel vision of ‘I’m making my dinner’ so he couldn’t possibly stop that. My dinner was cooked and out of the oven last night and I said holding Freddie doing anything to get the screaming to stop. He didn’t even notice my dinner was ready and was faffing about with sauces etc for his dinner, while his was still a while off being ready. When I eventually got mine it was stone cold and I ended up having to pick Freddie back up and eat with one hand. I just feel like I’ve done that all day long while I’ve been in by myself so I feel like he should completely take over for at least some of the night but he doesn’t 🙈

As I’ve said before on here, his one job is the 11pm feed. We eventually got the screaming to end about 9pm but I said we’re still waking him up at 11 or he’ll end up being up twice during the night instead of 3 and 6/7. That was fine and he was setting an alarm to feed him so I could just go to sleep. We’ve just woken up to Freddie crying. I’ve taken him through to the nursery and DH has come through. I said is he just up now because of the heat? I take it you’ve been up at 11 already? ‘Eh no, my alarm didn’t go off’ 🤦🏼‍♀️ You had literally ONE JOB! I’m getting to the stage if I want something done I may as well do it myself. So he’s (what he would consider) done that feed/change now, even though he arrived half way through it because he didn’t hear him crying beside him 🙄 but I’ll be back up in a few hours for the second time all because he can’t set a bloody alarm! 😡

Deep breaths! 😅

@sarah13xx wow I'd be pissed at that! My OH can't seem to use his initiative. I've said many times that DD sleeps better after having the big bottle of expressed milk yet tonight he brings her up at 12 saying she's not had it as she's just woken up.... well why didn't he give it to her then! He's kept her past 12 many times plus I didn't get to my nap until past 9. I've only had 2 and half hours sleep rather than 4 or 5 I usually get. I'm awake now as I'm far too warm plus DD is in her light sleep phase and I'm putting her dummy back in her mouth every 5 minutes. I'm slightly resigned to being awake and wish I could just go watch TV..

@Ready2020 they just don’t have a clue do they 🙈 He was shouting through earlier (as Freddie screamed over it) asking whether he should make a 4 or 5oz bottle. At this point in time just make a bottle of some sort!! He’d then ask again, further delaying this bottle ever being ready. He just has no sense of urgency about him at all 🙈

That’s not a lot of sleep 🤦🏼‍♀️ hope you’ve managed to get some more now

@sarah13xx @Ready2020 glad it’s not just me feeling frustrated with DH. Mine did the 3am feed (first time this week as I’ve done them all whilst he’s slept in another room) didn’t really do any paced feeding / sitting up so after putting DD down 10 minutes later she was sick everywhere so needed to change the sheets, take her out of the one swaddle bag we have for this heat and then needed to be resettled. DH fell back asleep 4-6.30 ish whilst I settled DD till 4.30 until she woke at 5 and didn’t get back off because she can’t seem to sleep without being swaddled. Very tired today, hoping he’ll offer to do all the feeds tonight or at least give me a lie in tomorrow without needing to be asked… we shall see 🤣

My OH can't seem to use his initiative

After a horrid day, DS decided to sleep through between 11pm and 5am. I'm so grateful, think I would have torn my hair out otherwise! Trying the EBF approach today, lots of smaller feeds, cuddles and quick feeding, as soon as he starts showing he might need a feed. It's probably not sustainable, but I can't bear watching him in such distress again and I also want to see how we get on without formula and what his skin looks like. So far, he's been great and now peacefully snoozing in his carrycot. 🤞 I think for me the best thing to do when I hit the crisis point is to actually have a good night sleep, rise early and tick off some things of the list, then I'm set for the day and my sensible hat is back on. This likely means DH will have to be more involved sometimes, as I don't think DS will always sleep through so well. Hope we all have a better day today! xx

@Fran919 this totally sounds like my DH 🙈 he says I may as well record myself and just play it back to him every day but I ask every time if he’s definitely sat him up after feeding, he always says yes but I can tell by the noise Freddie makes the second he lies him down. If you want something done right, do it yourself 😂

Hope today is a better day for everyone 🤞🏼 He’s gone down for his first nap without a drama 😌 long may it continue!

@PurplePansy05 initiative what's that?? My dh doesn't have any!

I've taken ds to soft play thankfully only toddler here as I can't see him in the big frame dd is having a growth spurt or something on fell I've done nothing but feed day and night for 3 days now. Dh has never done a night shift when she was first born he would take her to about 9 when she wanted fed but she has literally cluster fed all evening from about 6 -midnight the last few weeks . Which was fine when I was then getting to 5 ish before next feed but past week she is feeding every 2/3 hours during the night too

Currently trying to get Rowan to sleep! So we've gone for a walk. Do you get them to sleep during the day on the lounge amongst the noise?

Has anyone else booked on any classes yet?
I’ve booked on sensory classes from Monday through to end of October- I know he will only be just over 2 weeks old but thought even if he sleeps through it gives me something to take him to and hopefully meet more mums in the area!
I’ve been lucky so far he is formula feeding really well every 3 hours and sleeping well- hoping I don’t jinx it but I’m sure he will find his voice soon!
Everyone is doing amazing- even on the days you may not think so your babies love you! Xx

@Ready2020 we do try to get him to sleep with everything else going on around in the day - at home he's usually very good with that but he doesn't like to sleep at all when we're out and about unless the pram is moving - I think he's too interested in the world so he fights sleep

My boobs seem to have really started squirting milk now, yesterday I accidentally delatched Rowan on the train and milk went everywhere 😳

We never tip toe around DS and when if he sleeps, he sleeps through everything. I don't want to be restricted in the future just because he's learnt to nap in silence. He sleeps on most walks too, we got him used to this since he was 4 days old.

I will be taking him to weekly sensory classes from next week for 6 weeks. Mostly to meet other mums but also if we time it right, I think he'll enjoy them, he's a curious little boy at nearly 6 weeks old and his attention span is getting better and better every day. If he sleeps or feeds, well, so be it. I'd rather go now in case we end up in another lockdown and no classes for months again xx

@PurplePansy05 that’s what my DH was saying about the possibility of another lockdown, would just be typical 😰 the way things are going where I stay it definitely could be! The hospital have cancelled all elective procedures and aren’t seeing anyone in A&E unless it’s life and death basically.

@Ready2020 Freddie was good at sleeping during the day in his moses basket but he seems to be fighting it more every day and out in the pram is one of the only times I can get him to sleep 🙄 We consistently use the Ewan the sheep every night so he has white noise playing as he goes down which then goes off and I sometimes put it on the Alexa when we’re having dinner if I’m desperate for him to sleep but think I should probably get a shusher machine thing for downstairs and just use it every time so he knows when he hears that it’s time to sleep

@PurplePansy05 thanks for that last night, he eventually went to sleep at 12:45 and slept for 3 hours 20 mins which is the longest he’s ever gone for at night so small wins. Don’t know what it is about the nights though he just seems super fussy lately.

@Ready2020 we don’t tip toe around DS- wouldn’t be able too if I wanted too with a toddler 😂 helps later on though when you don’t have o have science for a nap! I fact the hoover sends him to sleep rather than wakes him.

How long is everyone’s babies sleeping for in the day? Like how long is each nap? Don’t know if he’s sleeping too much in the day?!

@Magik01 about 3 hours! Until the next feed!

@lucyrp ah okay good! Wasn’t sure if his naps were too long and I was self sabotaging nights with waking up 😂

@Magik01 his are completely random just now at 4 weeks. It’s different every day, he’s slept a lot today and one of his naps was up to 3 hours. Most seem to be 45 minutes- an hour and a half but it’s just whenever he wakes up. I’ve found if we have a day of not doing very much and stay in the house he seems to be worse that night and sleep less during the day. Waiting on him getting into a pattern with it but not sure when that’s going to happen! Every night it’s 3 hours like clockwork so im more than happy with that

Apparently they sleep for about 18 hours in every 24 at this age. Certainly he does seem to sleep a lot but I'm not really tracking it. Naps are just whenever he falls asleep feeding or wherever he is.

I'm completely at my wits end. Been trying to get Rowan down for 2 hours and she's screaming blue murder. OH is no help at all.

She is very fussy on the boob so it's not settling her like normal. Walk didn't help or dummy. I'm sitting here crying with her. No clue what's wrong with her. Worst evening ever.

Oh @Ready2020 I sympathise entirely! Frankie was up for almost 4 hours this afternoon - constant feeding for comfort then dirtying her nappy and just would not settle. We all had a big cry! The only thing that worked in the end was a feed in a pitch black room until she fell asleep on the boob then I rocked her in that position for 20 minutes. I think she'd got over stimulated and just couldn't calm down.

Hope she goes down soon @Ready2020 🤞🏼 It’s so hard going! Freddie has done that every night for hours but tonight we went out for dinner to the local pub and didn’t hear a peep out him the entire time 😧 Fed him and put him down there and he’s just projectile vomited repeatedly while lying down, picked him up as fast as I physically could but it’s so scary 🤦🏼‍♀️ Now just going to have to hold him til he sleeps

@Ready2020 hope she settles soon, dd is cluster feeding all evening again.. but in between feeds I've been getting some smiles which is lovely!
we have been using dentinox colic drops in a little cooked boiled water in the evenings the past week and I think it's made a big difference to make dd a little happier and more able to pass some wind.

She did finally settle on the boob (in the darkened lounge) and fell asleep and she's transferred OK to her bassinet. No idea how you deal with that every night. She's never been that bad. How can babies get over tired when they sleep all day! No idea.

I think in the evening we try and settle her in the lounge with the TV on. I think we need to do it either lounge with TV off and curtains drawn or in a different room. Our house is quite small so the only room downstairs we can use is the lounge (kitchen is tiny and only got downstairs loo) OH is on night shift tonight so was upstairs trying to nap. He came down when she was screaming and asked what could he do..... as if it looked like I knew what to do! He got snippy with me and just said you deal with it then and just walked off. Not very helpful really!

I also want to murder my cat. He's old and deaf and often just wanders about meowing very loudly. More than once he's woken Rowan up.

I think anyone who gets through the baby period without getting frustrated and shouting at some point is a total liar honestly!!

The most fussy period for us always coincides with DS2's bedtime, so I'm trying to get a hyper toddler down while all we can hear is crying or loud music from the other room :o Or it's when we've gone through the whole getting him and me ready for bed and I just get to sleep and then he can't settle down

But we have been pretty lucky so far. I think my only tip for those unsettled days is to try and take a step back and remember you can't always fix everything and it's not your job to anyway. Maybe they are just having a bit of a shit day. I think we can get really caught up in trying to meet their every need when sometimes there isn't really anything to be done and they don't know what they want either. Also it's definitely ok to prioritise your own needs and put them down somewhere safe while you attend to them. I was a bit of a martyr with DS1 but I do now just think well... Nobody has six hands and I'm going to be much more comfortable sitting down with you for the next hour or so if I have a wee and make a drink first.

DS1 is such a sucker and picks him up all the time because "he was making a sad face"