Due June 2020: thread 7. The one where babies appear

[AndddddHerewegoagain]

Hi everyone. Starting another thread!! Hoping we start having babies appear very soon!!

I already am part time at the moment (I took the opportunity so I could help care for my terminally I'll dad but he died last july and my PT contract was still in place for Sept). However, school is in the process of redundancies and my temporary, full time colleague is having her contract terminated so I think that means when I go back it'll have to be full time. As a teacher yourself, you'll know that full time doesn't mean the same in teaching as other professions. I'm not prepared to put my baby into childcare from 7.30-6 every day then work til 10pm every night and at least one day a weekend! I would absolutely do this if I had to, but having the option not to is nice. I might just sign up for some evening tutoring and if I get any work then it'd be an added bonus. I do miss my work friends a lot though, so that might have an impact on what I do. Fortunately DH is very supportive either way so it really is just up to me.

@SearchingTheSkies I am taking just over a year with annual leave tagged on either end. I think it works out 11 months of maternity leave, luckily working for the NHS (non clinical - HR) I get quite good maternity pay on top of statutory and I've been able to save to cover the no pay period.

Financially I definitely have to go back, husband is self employed and if this virus has proved anything, it's that we couldn't risk just relying on his income. I don't mind though as I've done a lot of study over the last few years for my career and I do love working.

I will definitely be making the most of the time off though with little one, and we do plan on having a second with a maximum 2 and half year age gap really.

I'm definitely going back. It's taken me years to get a job just teaching sixth form and that I actually like, so I'm not giving it up to anyone! I've had some awful jobs and this one is a dream despite still being a lot of work.

Also, weird question but does anyone else have all the emojis people use on this thread come up as little gin bottle emojis? For ages I thought you were all just looking forward to a post pregnancy drink and were punctuating everything with gin! I'm on a Samsung phone.

@peetieswie I don't blame you not wanting to give up that job. Sounds fab. I love teaching A level. I teach in a tough comprehensive and my main subject is being phased out so I'd have to teach my 2nd subject that I'm not as happy teaching which is also forming part of my decision. I would probably still look out for the right job if I did leave but it'd be nice to not have the pressure of accepting anything that wasn't what I really wanted.

@peetieswie I'm in an IPhone and seeing normal emojis... no little gin bottles hee hee

@APD1981 Tutoring could be a great option. I did quite a bit when I lived in London. I really enjoyed it.

@Smiffette That's great that you enjoy your job. I feel the same way - wouldn't want to rely only on my DH's salary just in case.

@peetieswie Just teaching sixth form sounds fab! Hold onto that job! I'm quite lucky really as I work in a lovely school, but the workload and pressure to get certain grades does wear me down. It all feels like a numbers game much of the time. No gin bottles for me, btw. I'm on an iPhone.

@peetieswie I'm on Samsung. No gin bottles for me either.

@SerBrienneOfHouseTarth sorry to hear you've been unwell. I hope you feel better soon.

Sounds like most ladies are aiming for 9 to 12 months off. I was going to go back after 7 months max. Difficult to explain, but the nature of my contract means that after 2 or so months of my return, I can work ad hoc (max 3 days a week) and make similar money to when I'm working full time. I just need to go back full time for a bit to ensure they don't ask for my maternity pay back.
But essentially from March next year, I plan to work ad hoc for a few months so I can be available for the baby. My DHs work is so flexible and at home. We would not need childcare. His company is also giving him 3 months off with full pay starting from January, which is so helpful!

Sorry you're unwell @SerBrienneOfHouseTarth hope you kick it soon - it must be a relief to get a negative for Covid

I'm in envy of those already on almost on leave! I have 2 weeks to go and only have a weekend until my ELCS so no time off at all. I was hoping to take 12 months but it depends on finances. If I could find a job that's only part time I could probably go back at 9 months. I don't get any maternity leave as I am freelance/self employed so I have given my notice.

@Missgemini that arrangement sounds ideal - especially if your DH's work is also being accommodating! Part time would work so well as a full week away from our bubs would be hard!

Im going back after 6 months 🙈🙈 but 2/3 days a week. I went back fulltime after 12 months with my first I was ready to jack my job in but i started to enjoy it once I'd resettled.

I have to say however tough lockdown has been its been a real eye opener to the time I've missed out on with ds. Sure theres been crappy days but theres also been amazing days and I've just watched his personality bursting out, im so glad I'm not going back fulltime.

This is not in anyway intended as a guilt trip- before babies i was a nanny and relied on people working fulltime 😂 this is just my personal experience!!

I’m taking 16 weeks maternity and then I’m back at work (this is choice - we could survive on my husband’s income if needs be). I love my career and I spent 7 years completing 3 degrees to get it, so I’m definitely not giving it up! I’m going back full time but I have a fair bit of flexibility in my job and will be mainly working from home until 2024 which makes it much easier and appealing!

Hey sorry, rubbish at keeping up with this at the moment lol! Me and baby doing well, loving all the cuddles😍 struggling with breastfeeding a little at the moment, pumping to increase milk supply but he is being topped up with formula as well. Hoping it will work out okay soon. He's slightly jaundice due to being 3 weeks early but should go In 10 days or so.

Cannot wait for you all to have your beautiful bubbas! Good luck @newbyxx sounds fine everything you're packing for hospital, I was induced with the gel, and didn't need hormone drip after as he was already here lol! I really hope you have a good experience. You'll feel really proud of yourself after!!

Hope everyone's enjoying last stages of the pregnancy, all the aches and pains will be gone soon🙈 xxx

Thanks for all the good wishes! Itchy as f*ck today and the rash is a bit worse but all bloods came back normal so far and back for a checkup at daycare tomorrow so feeling well taken care of.

I'm off on leave from today too - wooop - prior to mat leave starting in June. I'll go back after the paid period ends as I can't afford to take unpaid leave. I went back to full time work after 7 months last time and it was grand. My mat leave options have changed so I will get longer paid this time, about 9 months, but the pay will be less towards the end.

It's getting exciting now hearing everyone starting leave etc!

I would love to take more time off but currently working on 19 weeks maternity as of this Saturday plus any holiday I have left! We just can't afford my salary to go down, we have just moved this year to our first house and getting married in January so we are literally doing everything at once.

On another note is anyone that's due a similar time to me experiencing movement but just subtle movement now? She tends to move at the same times still but less than previously. I have put it down to less space and that she's back to my front but wondered if this is normal?

37+4

I'm taking a year off, so because I stopped so early, will be back at work when the baby is 10m, which is what I did with DS. I was mentally ready for work at that stage, but I found it really tough, as he was going through a bad sleep regression and breastfeeding 3-4 times a night.
I really struggled settling back into work, even though I normally love my job, so I feel a bit more prepared this time round.

I'm getting occasional period cramps, every few days or so. Lots of Braxton Hicks today and quite and increased amount of discharge. All clear though, I don't think it's a show.

Hospital phoned today after my iron infusion last week, they decided they want to put me on iron tablets as well after all. Building up a list of questions for my antenatal appointment on Friday. I've been on aspirin and want to check when I stop it - some things I've read say 36 weeks, some say right until delivery. And I want to discuss some sort of birth plan as well.

35+5

It’s so interesting to see how different everyone’s plans are re going back to work. I’m not planning to go back to work for at least a year but I am hoping to start my at home tutoring again as soon as the coronavirus situation and baby-care allows because I’ve hated not having my own income lately. I finished working in feb and was supposed to continue tutoring right up until June but that also hasn’t happened since Feb because of the virus. I hated my job though, if I enjoyed it then maybe I’d be wanting to go back sooner. My mum went back to work when I was just six weeks old (out of choice, she’s told me many times she doesn’t particularly like babies 🤣🤣) @peetieswie those are cry-laughing emojis not gin bottles 😆

@Busylizzie85 I'm 37+6 and would say it varies day by day. Some days the movements are so big and uncomfortable. Other days, they're just 'normal'.
It's so annoying, but I think you should speak to midwife at least. Most probably no issues, but cannot risk it.
The stress of pregnancy, ey?

Agreed @Missgemini everyday is a new worry specially for a first baby! I think a lot of it is me being over anxious now the closer to the end I get!

@Busylizzie85 I'm 37+2 and have been experiencing the exact same. He does a few big movements but I have found over the last few days it's still as often but the movement do feel smaller! I have growth scan tomorrow and midwife was today and his heart rate etc was fine x

@Busylizzie85 mine is also back to my front x

@peetieswie love the gin bottles thing!!

I am having 8.5 months off and then DH is taking about 3 months. We were very keen to split the leave this time as shared parental leave wasn't around when our DD was born.

No chance of giving up work. I enjoy my job! Know it will be hard again but then again before you know it they go to school anyway so it isn't long to survive the madness in the grand scheme of things

That's good to know @newbyxx it really helps that everyone on here can relate or are having the same experiences 😊

@amymaria2 so lovely to hear from you. Glad you're enjoying all the cuddles! And as for the breast feeding, well done for persevering. I think my baby will end up bring combi fed at some point too. Have you decided on his name now? He's absolutely gorgeous xx

@newbyxx I've been having exactly the same worries that I can't feel the movements as much now, have to sit and feel for them! Each time I convince myself I should call the midwife he has a stretch or sticks his bum out and I don't want to waste their time. Will definitely be asking about it at my growth scan on Wednesday. Having some major anxiety now being 36 weeks with no idea what my birth plan is going to be!! 😩😩

Lovely to hear from you @AmyMaria2 - he's so lovely and makes me so excited for my little one to come! My DD has jaundice too and had formula top ups until about 2 weeks when my milk supply caught up with her needs and she would fall asleep boobie drunk after being on the breast and she didn't even want the top up. We didn't try bottle again until 6 months and she completely refused it! But that's another story!

@Busylizzie85, @newbyxxx, and @BabyBird20 I'm 37+3 and have found the same with my movements. Certainly not the full kicks I was getting before but I would say just as often. Because it's less of an outward kick and more of a wiggle I find it's easier not to notice it throughout the day when I'm busy. Certain things get him moving to reassure me though. Lying on my side or going on all fours I think forces him to move and shift position, a cold drink and a shower! I think the vibrations or sound of the shower wake him up. And a fool proof one that gets him going but is harder to simulate is a good ole hearty sneeze. It gets him moving like he's annoyed haha.

I did mention it at my midwife appointment last week that the movements were different but just as often and she said it's normal as long as you keep feeling movements. Any worries please call. He's been like this for almost a week so I guess this is his new normal. When he does a bum stretch it hurts a bit though like he's running out of room and stretching out in there!!

But certainly the worry doesn't end does it?!

@peetieswie you’ve obviously got gin on the brain?!

@Busylizzie85 yes I’ve noticed the same, only in the last few days. I think he’s just a bit more squished in there now. I did a bit of research and it seems normal, the frequency of the movements following baby’s usual pattern is the most important thing.

Re work I’m self employed so am getting maternity allowance (same at statutory mat pay). I started that early due to corona virus, so will get it til January. Then I will go back to work one day a week (I have a really really fun and well paid job on a Saturday, DH can have both kids with no childcare fees!!!), and back fully to all my usual jobs from Easter term 2021 because that’s when I could get baby a nursery place from. I’ve got a little bit of money saved to tide us over and to be honest we’re pretty used to being skint anyway so it won’t feel much different!

With DD I was itching to get back to work from when she was about 9 months, but we had just moved and couldn’t get her a nursery place til she was 15 months, so that’s when I went back. It was far too long for me and I had started to go a bit nuts!