Due May 2020 (thread 3)

[sao81]

Carrying on from thread 2!

How is it Monday already? Another 5 full days of work! I’m already on countdown until maternity leave 😂

Ugh I don’t know if I’ve got major hormones kicking in but I seem to have lost a lot of patience the last few days. My toddler has been really winding me up!! Then I get worried cos I’m getting stressed and don’t want to affect the baby. Always something to feel guilty about!

So girls am I ridiculous for booking a private scan a week after my nhs one 🙈
I left my scan feeling so happy everything was ok but also a little sad. My app was delayed by an hour and because of that I was so desperate for the toilet I felt physically ill and I just couldn't enjoy it or ask the questions I had prepared! I also felt a bit rushed and just wanted to enjoy it more.
Anyway I thought this morning I'm so lucky to be pregnant, and I've been a bit down the past week which is making me feel worse. My mum has gone half with me (bless her) for a private scan so we're gonna go tomorrow evening and see the little baby again!
I just feel a bit silly.... but I want to enjoy these moments!

So booked into see midwife next week at 15+2 even though it meant to be 16. Spoke to community midwife at the hospital and said I can book in early and as often as I want as really feel my mental health is slowly getting me down more and more everyday getting closer to the weeks I lost my son and daughter at and knowing stitch is being put in the week before I lost my daughter so worrying so much about it all and over thinking everything. Got so much else going on getting to me aswell so I am just struggling right now.

Sorry for the little paragraph ladies. Hope you are all well.

@november90 I dont blame you as you should be able to enjoy your scan appointment and I think I would have done the same if I was in your shoes.

@november90 absolutely not ridiculous, enjoy your private scan and I hope you can enjoy the experience more this time and it gives you peace of mind. During my first pregnancy I had multiple private scans before 20 weeks for peace of mind as well as the NHS one at 12 weeks and don't regret it at all!

@fluffyunicorn86 I'm sorry you are feeling so low and sorry about your previous losses I think it's perfectly understandable you feel the way you do plus it sounds like you have added stress on top of all of this too. I'm glad you can see the midwife early, there are always people around on this thread who will listen and chat if you feel you need to vent/talk about things too so you are not alone X

I have a scan booked for tomorrow to check what the bleeding one, praying my little one is still ok in there 🙏

Little baby growing nicely. Was such a reassurance to finally see them! Also we're now a week ahead so EDD: 09/05/20 (2 days before my birthday) !!!

Hi everyone I’m new here I’m 14 weeks tomorrow with my second baby my first baby Turns 15 just before I’m due. Anyone else suffering with bad headaches? I’m being sick because of them :-( praying this won’t carry on for much longer!

@facevalue yes had my flu jab about 4 weeks ago now. Feeling a little better today. Just think I’m really run down, had a hectic week.

@november90 no you go for a scan if you want a scan, I think we are so lucky to be able to have access to these things so if you can afford it why not.

@Helensss so pleased you are getting to see baby again tomorrow, nice little reassurance but I’m sure all is fine.

I’m already creaming and oiling my tummy 😩 a have a few silvery stretch marks from DD and hoping I don’t get many more. I’m sure genes do play a part but my mum had 3 children and two MC’s and doesn’t have a single stretch mark! I obviously don’t take after her 🙈

@bumpingalong84 thank you, I do feel lucky they’ve asked me in for a scan but also very nervous after the bleed.

Hope everyone is good 😊
X

@Helensss good girl. so glad you checked with midwife and that your hospital is accommodating to scan u quick x just like the others said i'm sure everything is fine but just think u get to see baby again! nurture your body and mind xxx hugs

@Bumpingalong84 glad u feel better. every night i get congested sinuses and runny nose - i sneeze etc like i have a cold but it gets better during the day ... it's been like this for 10 days maybe... i'm just thinking might just be pregnancy hormones

@Steps31 i'm so sorry u feeling rubbish. it sounds like migraines to me- sometime they start during pregnancy and i'm sure if u tell ur midwife she might want to check your blood pressure and blood tests again. worth checking?

@lornz awwww beautiful picture. congratulations x my friend has her baby on her birthday which also happens to be valentine's day! if it's your first then most ppl give birth after due date ... 7 may is our wedding anniversary lol i'm sure i'll get my c section then 😂😂😂

@november90 just like the others said enjoy it. i wouldn't judge u if u went on holiday to spain twice or if u decided to watch a movie in the cinema 5 times... that's not any different it's money spent to make u happy x

@fluffyunicorns86 oh babe... i am absolutely proud of you for seeking help speaking openly about your anxiety and fears. you are clearly an amazing person and showing your unborn baby love indirectly ... if you care for you you will be better fit to care for your babies ( the current and future ones if u would like more). I NEVER before had real understanding or meaningful ability to support someone who lost a pregnancy until i had my own loss- not through lack of empathy or emotions it's just not possible to realise how awful it is until u have it.... I/We would not think less of you if u tell us u feel rubbish or stressed xxx massive hug ..

@Emmacb82 oh hon. as a fellow toddler's mum, i absolutely know what u mean. i'm honestly dumping most of the toddler daily care on my hubby because i'm hormonal tired and can't keep my calm/ patience then if i did i absolutely feel guilty and like a bad mum cos i wants as lovely as i can be pre- pregnancy then this thought makes me feel more guilty because being pregnant is an absolute blessing and i should be grateful and lovely and clam bla bla WE R HUMAN AND ITS OK TO HAVE OFF DAYS we r not bad mums and toddlers are bloody hard work at times 🥺😳

i have been trying to personally reply to each comment but scrolling back and forth and trying to link the names to each comment is tasking for a tired hormonal person on mobile phone screen - if i missed ppl out it's purely a mistake not intentionally ignoring anybody x sweet dreams to all

Hope all is ok @Helensss. I’ve had a small bleed too but I did read it’s quite normal after a bowel movement or sexual intercourse. It would be great to hear any advice you are given today though x

Thanks @facevalue I didn’t actually speak to my midwife,
I’ve never actually met her.. the lady that did my booking in appt was standing in for someone.
I phoned the day assessment team who said they didn’t know where I should go as I’m on the cusp being 13 weeks, so she said she’d speak to a dr and get back to me. 4 hours went by and I didn’t hear anything so I phoned again and spoke to someone else who said there was a note on the file from the morning saying I’d need to phone epu, but she hadn’t bothered to phone me back. She was also asking me info about my bloods which I didn’t know and she said the info hadn’t been added to my file.., I had the booking in appt 6 weeks ago! So I phoned the epu and they said I’d need to get a referral from my gp but they couldn’t see me as I’m 13 weeks and the cut off is 12. So I call my gp now in a complete state, he phoned the epu and gets a dr to call me back immediately to book me in for a scan today. Sorry for the rant but I needed to get it out... that’s bad treatment right? I had also just been referred to recurrent miscarriage team before I was pregnant again and haven’t been offered any extra support In this pregnancy, I’m quite a strong cookie but yesterday really upset me. Sorry for the rant! Hope everyone’s ok today! Xx

@helensss ahhh that’s awful!! I’ve not met my midwife yet either for same reasons as you so I’m not sure who I’m meant to talk to about any issues! I’m feeling really quite crampy atm, I hope it’s normal! My stomach looks huge today so hoping it’s just stretching pains?

@Helensss oh no. that's so stressful. sorry i assumed it was all rosey treatment. well done you for fighting your corner. i know i keep saying this but even a clear hand written letter addressed to the person in charge ( the EPU manager/ your named consultant/ your GP/ the hospital chief executive) or on one of those patient feedback forms that r usually hanging on walls. you can also ask at the reception for the feedback form when you attend the scan. if you don't let the people in charge know nothing will improve. coming back to you- please try not to let this upset u too much, baby is probably ok, u did the right thing involving your GP. when all has been done and u r reassured be sure to thank whoever helped. u r 13 weeks and never met your midwife 😳😳😳 that's not ok. hopefully u don't need to see the recurrent miscarriages team anyway cos u r pregnant and all will go well x massive hug

@sunshine if you have done a self referral online then just call the switchboard and ask for early pregnancy team/ midwife's reception and explain u never met a midwife and how many weeks pregnant and that u had pain and bleed. i was given a file and a phone app and highlighted the phone numbers to contact in an emergency 🥵

goodluck ladies i'm so sorry about this stress

i woke up at 7am with a headache that i still have! i might give in and take paracetamol 😞🤕

@facevalue I did see a midwife but she was standing in! I have my next midwife app a week Friday for the 16 week checkup and apparently that will then be my midwife throughout.

Seems like a lot of people end up seeing a different midwife at booking in. I did too and was told my regular midwife would see me at 16 weeks. A shame really as that’s the appointment where they have the time to discuss things with you and you know they won’t be passed over.

Thanks guys 😊 I think I will give some feedback, the lady who phoned me actually said ‘let’s get you in tomorrow and scan you and stop all this faffing around’ I was so relieved and will definitely thank who I see today! With the recurrent team I just would have thought I’d have a bit of support given my history but wasn’t even offered an early scan, maybe that’s not normal practice I don’t know. Oh wel hopefully today will go well! It’s nice that they are seeing me even though I’m technically passed their ‘date’. My friend is the same as you @facevalhe has a list of numbers i haven’t got and she’s in the same area as me. She had a difficult birth Last time so I think she’s on the continuity team or something.

@Sunshine8888
I bet cramps are just growing pains but maybe call day assessment to speak to someone if you want some reassurance ? Do you have that? How many weeks are you? X

@helensss I’m 14+3, I think I’ll just monitor for now, hopefully nothing to worry about as you say. But after 3 early scans due to bleeding I just get nervous every time I see any hint of blood!

@sunshine8888 oh sorry I missed your message where you said about the bleed. I will post my experience later on definitely, we are only a week apart so probably similar reasons xx

@Helensss ohh dear, you've had some a heck of an experience already! I hope everything works out well and I'm glad you're getting your scan done tomorrow. Happy mum, happy baby!

I wish there is continuity with midwives as I've met with 3 already and I'm just 11wks.

Does anyone know the process of changing birthing hospital or having a home birth instead? Whilst researching the hospital which I put down for follow ups and birthing, I realised they have had a couple of maternity mishaps and deaths and rated for improvement on CQC until recently. They've been on the papers too and all these makes me very nervous especially since this is my first time and don't know what to expect. I dont know if I should get an independent midwife or doula or if I'm worrying too far ahead for where I am now. So stressed about it and have been for the last few days after seeing horrible reviews online.

Hugs to everyone feeling a bit down at the moment with headaches and just life in general etc. We will all be fine!
I guess most of us are at the stage of having our 12wk scan done already or to be done over the next few weeks, so lots of positive thoughts to you all.

Feeling incredibly nervous today ladies. Our 12 week scan is tomorrow but not until 5:30pm so I've planned a busy day. I just feel so anxious. I've had no bleeding, I've had mild cramping which I think is stretching pains. I've been nauseous then stopped then nauseous again. My boobs have hurt then dulled down...

I've nothing to make us think anything is wrong, as saw a heartbeat at 7 weeks after 3 prior scans (due to pain) that were just horrendous and I think they have totally made me on edge now.

I'm a worrier anyway and struggle with anxiety a lot, and today it's just taken over. I'm so hoping tomorrow is ok to put my mind at ease 🥺

All ok at my scan! Saw the little bean again and has grown the right amount since last scan 😊 No cause for the bleeding apparently. They’ve also given me a direct number to call if it happens again, so relieved! X

Fab news @helensss, must be so nice to see baby again! I’m struggling with the wait for the 20 week scan ☹️

@mrsf1204 I totally understand, I was so nervous before my scan too. Hope you have a lovely, positive experience tomorrow xx