Due in July Part FOUR - gather here!

[Cyee]

Can't believe we need more space... again...

Is anyone else worrying about how much weight they've put on? I've never really worried about my weight and have always been 7st 10 (well, whenever I've bothered to check I have been) and am 5ft 5. I've never particuarly worried about what I eat but I guess I'm realatively healthy and exercise a reasonable amount from walking/cycling to work etc. I've weighed myself and I've put on about 2 stone which seems like a huge amount given that I've got 6 wks to go. I'm a bit concerned about this mainly because my mum, who is smaller than me, had pretty big babies (8lb 5 and 9lb something). Also, I've given up cycling to work for the past few months so a bit worried that will have loads of weight to lose.

Is 2 st normal?!?

Catz,

I am 5'6" and weighed 8.5 stone previously. At week 24 I had gained 20 lbs (1.6 stone?) and I'm afraid to ever get weighed again. I guarantee I've gained at least two stone by now. Probably more!

Sorry I have trouble with the stones thing - I'm American, used to doing it all in pounds (unless we're talking dollars!)

Catz, I was in denial about the whole weight gain thing (I put on 3 stone last time, from 10stone to 13!!!)until about 2 months ago. Last time scared the absolute life out of me but I ended up losing it all and more within 4 months without any trouble through breasfeeding (hurrah for breastfeeding!) and walking everywhere with the pram at double speed! Also did pilates which was so helpful at putting my body back together.

This time I've put on 1.5-2 stones from a lower starting point so I'm not feeling quite as traumatised! I'm also sleeping better and not getting as much indigestion/leg cramps/out of breath stuff that I did the last time. I blame it all on running after an 18month old!

Welcome to all the newbies and weddingcake that was hilarious!
Hope everyone's feeling ok...

Hi to all the newbies.

Jam - I seem to have got a couple of small lumps/flaps of skin under my arms. (Sorry horrible image.) I wouldn't call them moles because they're flesh toned and they're about the size of a pin head. I have read something about them, and moles, being another weird pregnancy side effect. The info did say they were harmless, but I'd mention it to your MW anyway.

We've had a busy week. Our bedroom is finished now, the LO's room is almost done, I have to get the cot from my parents and decide on curtains & bedding, but I might wait till it arrives and I know whether it's boy or girl flavoured

Last weekend my in-laws came round and were so impressed with the work my parents have done on the bedrooms that they've offered to come round on Friday and pull tiles off the bathroom wall to sort out the mould problems that I haven't been able to fix with my trusty pumice stone
They're also going to try to fix the lights in the kitchen which haven't worked for months.

It'll be like a new house, I should have got pregnant sooner.

Tomorrow I'm going to be a model My friend is setting up a photography business, and she wants to do a "Bumps to Births" package. Tomorrow she's going to take lots of pictures of my bump, then she'll take lots of pictures of LO before it's 3 months old.
I'm normally very concious about showing off my belly, but as it's a freebie I'm putting myself at her mercy on the condition she photoshops out my 2 little stretch marks

Wish I was feeling so positive about my body Kyte. I lost loads of weight last year and have put it ALL back on - far, far more than recommended. Worried about effect on baby now. Seeing MW today, worried will find something wrong. Bad night didn't help, couldn't get comfortable, bump kept tightening. Must be BH. Not painful but very distracting. Feeling miserable this morning. Sorry.

Kyte bf doesn't hurt if you are doing it right. If not DON'T worry. There are loads of organisations to help. They will come round to your house, or you go to a meeting and they will watch you and show you the correct attachment. GET HELP AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. In fact go to a meeting even if you don't need help. I went to Bfn meetings and found them very helpful wrt to expressing and storing bm.

Association of Breastfeeding Mothers ABM
Breastfeeding Netwoork BfN
La Leche League LLL
National Childbirth Trust NCT

and I'm sure others can all help.... Not to mention loads of mners who are great.

Kyte - I'm worrying about BF too. Oddly I was far more positive about it until I went to an NHS antenatal class. They were so militantly pro-breast feeding and so dismissive of any concerns that I felt I wasn't getting the whole truth. Also there was no advice about what to do when things went wrong because they were so sure that things didn't go worng. e.g. I wanted to know what you do if you've got cracked and bleeding nipples as I know that this has happened to friends and caused them to stop because they didn't know how to deal with it, once they stopped 'temporarily' milk dried up and that was it. The response was simply 'that doesnt happen unless you're doing it wrong' (not much help if you have done it wrong and it's 3 am with a starving baby!) I know a lot of people who've given up after intending to BF because they've had problems and felt unprepared for that. This has alse caused anxiety and depression for quite a few people I know.... Still intending to try it but am less confident.

Thanks for the comments on weight. My main concern is that I might have huge babies (the rest of me doesn't look that different from normal so the weight must be going somewhere! and my mum had big babies). Are the two related?

I call them the breastapo! I am very very pro breastfeeding but not at the expense of a happy mum (and therefore happy baby).

on your behalf JAM. But hope you're feeling OK now, physically at least.

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Jam, I would tell your partner. This is an important time for you and you shouldn't be worrying on your own. Thankfully it came to nothing, but it's important you get support. How odd about the clear fluid. Now a small break of waters? I guess the hospital would check.

When the baby does come, you're going to need things very calm around you, so I would put him in the picture (even if you slightly bend the truth so it's not so alarming for him) but get him on side so he's ready to step in if things get too much again.

JAM - sounds as if you've been far more sensible and calm than I would have been in that stiuation - you must be absolutely livid. I agree with Cakehead about telling your partner (even in a more mild form). You need to have someone who understands the situation that you can talk to esp as you clearly have a lot of emtional stress at the moment. Late pregnancy is difficult enough without all of this. It would be worse if it came out later which it may well do if things are not obviously not quite right with your mum etc.

Hope that your Dad is OK.

Justaboutmanaging, sorry to hear about your horrible night. I think the most indiscreet person in all of this is your aunt. It is easy to see how your mother maybe thought her faraway brother might be a safe person in whom to confide, easy to see how he told his wife. Very difficult to understand her motivation for letting you know that she knew. Yuk. I am sure there was no malicious intent from your mother, perhaps she is worried about you and needed to talk to someone, to get another perspective perhaps. Perhaps she feels a bit overloaded what with your dad and everything. Look after yourself, physically and emotionally. Tell your mum (not in a blaming way) what your aunt relayed to you. Don't let it become a problem between you and your mum. Hope you are getting some rest now.

JAM I am so sorry to hear about your dreadful evening.
On the losing fluid front I can tell you that it happened to a friend of mine. She thought her waters had broken and was admitted to hospital and it turned out that a very small amount of fluid had been lost (she said it felt like tons!) and that all was well. As a tip she was asked over the phone if the fluid smelt sweet...apparently amniotic fluid has that sweet aroma to it.

On the 'family conversations' I agree with Caroline that your Mum did not maliciously spread this news and that the gossiping lies with your Aunt.
It really really annoys me that there are some people who like nothing better than to spread rumours and talk about other people's intimate lives and details.

I understand you not wanting to tell your other half and would probably feel like that myself. But keep this to yourself only if you think you can cope with it and not stress. The minute you start to affect your health is the point at which you need to share it. He may be more understanding than you think.

Pregnancy is hard enough but having to deal with this bull$hit is unnecessary! I would try and have a calm conversation with your Mum and explain to her that you would prefer her not to talk to extended family about your issues. It may help to write down the points you would like to get across so that you don't get too emotional about it and upset her.

I hope that you feel better and please know that you are being sent tons of cyber hugs!

HI Divaskychick.

Justaboutmanaging- sorry you have had such a rough time of things at the moment. Big big hugs to you.

Sorry have obly briefly skimmedt the messages and have forgotton already...

Washing my pram etc today...

When can we start the rasberry leaf tea, is it 34 or 36 weeks..!!! Think will check other threads and see.. (cant remember when I started them last time.)

Have a good weekend all..

Take care.xx

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JAM- just wanted to send you tonnes of virtual hugs (((((( ))))))
You have enough on your plate with your Dad (really hoping his operation when it happens goes smoothly & is 100% successful) without all of this. Like the others have said I think you should share some of this at least with your husband. Many women confide private info in their mothers but do not expect to hear more about it from extended families. But I'm sure your mum didn't intentionally gossip to hurt you, but your aunt had no place calling you about it all. I am so relieved for you that little one is ok but do try to minimise all stress and make your family & husband aware of that. Remember you and your baby are priority no. 1, as hard as it is try to let everything else wash over you like water off a ducks back.

Sorry everyone else haven't been on for a while and so not really caught up
Re. breastfeeding often the first 2 weeks can be tough until both you & the baby have worked out everything...but do get support as soon as possible there is lots of advice out there and it should not be painful. I breastfed DS for 10.5 months and it certainly helped me lose my pregnancy weight and more! Plus I loved it, just such a close bond! But never put yourself under too much pressure- definitely agree a happy mum = happy baby so just don't forget that!

I have not been weighed since my booking appt and don't have any scales so dread to think how much I've gained!! But not worried as will lose it I'm determined!! A friend who has 3 children gained 4 stone with each pregnancy (and she was tiny to start with) but lost it all each time within 9 months...remember it takes 9 months to gain the weight so can easily take 9 months to lose it (well usually the last stone is the toughest!). Don't worry about it too much!

My Mum was over for a week and left this morning. Found her help really great although have to admit it is nice to have the house back to ourselves (feel bad for saying that though!). Anyway LO and I seem to be doing ok, next growth & blood flow scan next Thurs so hoping all is well then!

Huge hugs to you all xxxx

twoplusone - on the tea, the woman in Holland and Barrett said 34 wks (so I have started having one a night), last night the NCT person said 35 wks although she also said that it used to be 20 wks but the companies that make it have started to say later for fear of litigation....

Going back to the 'how much weight' question...I haven't weighed myself but feel absolutely huge and I swear my face looks like its at least trebled in size!

Never been one to worry about my weight because I am really small so trying desperately not to worry about it!

Just had a breastfeeding tip from my friend who had her LO on Saturday. She has been reading 'What to expect when your breastfeeding...and what to do if you cant'. She said its been a life saver for her and something she is constantly referring to...so I may go and treat myself to it later on today.

Big hugs to all.

Think I am going to start on Sunday, might trawl through archieve threads and see when I started taking it with ds. A few have said they took from 34 weeks though.
Firststar 37weeks seems a little late to me as this is classed as term.. suppose each mw thinks differently towards things.

I am really starting to nest. Am going to get all the baby clothes washed this afternoon as really feel the need to get everything ready for lo. Pram has been done, carseat stuff is in the wash as I type. It is finally starting to sink in that I am going to have another baby soon..

Tommorrow we can see we see our lo next month

Hi Ladies,

Thanks for being so welcoming! I can't see how you keep each other straight to respond to every post, my pg brain is fried. I can barely remember my own name half the time!

Really good to hear that BF helps get the weight off, thanks for that. I was already intending to try for the health reasons - I have terrible allergies and didn't breast feed so hopefully the LO will have a better shot than I did. I've been told there could be issues however, as I have breast implants (I mentioned I'm from LA, right? lol) and that can get in the way.

Someone asked about AF pains. That's a yes for me. Is that BH?

I just had my first "drive by" bump molestation! I just couldn't be upset, the lady was so sweet and told me how tiny I am. Can't hate a good liar!